Kabanata 1

I was abruptly awakened by aggressive knocks outside my room. Namamaga pa ang mga mata ko kakaiyak habang walang tigil din sa pagkirot ang puso ko dahil sa sakit. Kahit anong insulto at sira ko kay Ethan sa utak ko, hindi ko maipagkaila na minahal ko siya ng lubusan.

Confused and disoriented, I soon realized that it was Mama calling out angrily from the other side of the door. Ang aga naman!

Tiningnan ko ang orasan, mag o-one pm na pala!?

With a heavy sigh, I slowly got out of bed and made my way towards the door. As I opened it, Mama quickly stormed into my room at hindi pa maipinta ang mukha nito.

"What did you do?" Mama demanded, her voice dripping with anger.

Kunot noo ko namang tinitigan ang ina "What do you mean, Ma?"

Mama's anger intensified sa hindi ko alam na kadahilanan. "Why did you break up with Ethan?! He's the one who made our company more successful, and now you've ruined everything! Nababaliw ka na ba?!"

Napatanga ako sa sinabi niya. Tears welled up in my eyes in instant as I tried to explain mself. "M-Ma, he cheated on me. How could I just ignore that? Kailangan kong hiwalayan siya!"

Mama's tone became even more hostile. "You should have stayed blind! My God, Camelia!"

My jaw dropped, my heart shattering into even smaller pieces at Mama's hurtful words and insensitivity.

Inilingan ko si Mama habang wala pa ring tigil sa pag agos ang mga luha ko. Even I was already expecting my mother to react like this, masakit pa ring harap-harapan niya akong ginaganito na para bang isa lang akong bagay sa kanya.

"Ma, he hurt me. He cheated on me! Naririnig n'yo ba ako?" I pleaded with a voice filled with pain.

"You're just being dramatic, Camelia! As long as he's not physically hurting you, you should stay with him!"

Tangina? Ganito na ba siya kasilaw sa pera at kapangyarihan para pagsalitaan ako ng ganito? I felt frustration and anger reached a breaking point.

Galit ko siyang tinitigan. "You will never understand what I felt because you didn't love Papa!" I exclaimed as my voice trembling.

Nanlaki ang mga mata ni Mama at namula ang magkabilang pisngi sa galit. In a fit of rage, Mama slapped me hard across the face. "Wala kang alam! How dare you!"

Taas dibdib kong tiningnan ang ina. Namumula na rin ang mga mata nito at may namumuong mga luha sa kanyang mga mata. Humikbi ako sabay iling ng paulit-ulit. May alam ako. I even heard Papa drunk himself to death in his library office and talked alone of how bad Mama was to him. Alam kong biktima rin silang dalawa sa arrange marriage and Mama was in a relationship that time.

"Why are you treating me like this? I was doing my best---"

"Not so close to the best you are talking about, Camelia. Ang best na magagawa mo ay ang ayusin ang sa inyo ni Ethan!" she demanded.

My eyes widened in shock and defiance. "N-No, Mom! I won't—" I started to say, but Mama cut me off.

"Do it, or I will disown you!" Mama threatened. Pinukol niya ako ng masamang tingin bago niya isinara ang pinto ng padabog.

I stood here inside of my room with a trembling heart. Dahan-dahan akong napaupo sa sahig at dinamdaman ang lahat-lahat. The betrayals, the hurtings...Hindi ko alam kung ano ang susundin at uunahin. Ang sarili ko ba o ang pamilya.

I gritted my teeth when I saw Ethan waiting on me at the living room. He is with my parents and Mama was talking to him like there's nothing wrong. Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras kong pinakalma ang sarili sa kuwarto para harapin sila. As usual, Papa was there sitting besides Mama nonchalantly.

"Oh, Camelia is here!" masayang bungad ni Mama. Tumayo pa ito para igiya ako palapit sa kanilang tipon.

Napako ang tingin ko sa bulaklak na dala ni Ethan. It was my favorite white tulips. Palagi niya akong binibigyan ng mga bulaklak sa tuwing nagagawi siya rito sa bahay.

He stood up and smiled. Fuck you! Nagawa mo pang ngumiti sa akin?

"For you...." aniya sabay bigay sa akin no'ng boquet. God knows how I badly throw this boquet to his face pero pinipigilan ko nalang. Damn this!

"Salamat," ikli at malamig kong sinabi.

"So, saa kayo pupunta, Ethan?" nakangiting baling ni Mama sa kanya. Ethan eyes didn't leave me before he answered Mama.

"Sa Conquest Resto po sana, Tita. Mag ce-celebrate ng anniv namin ni Camelia," he uttered.

Gusto kong humahalakhak nang humahalakhak iyong hanggang mawalan ako sa katinuan. Putangina. Bigla ko na namang naalala ang eksena kung paano niya binayo-bayo si Rachel. Fuck! That's very disgusting!

"That's great! So," Mama turned to me with a smile on her face wishing it was a genuine smile. "You already looked good as usual, anak. Puwede na kayong lumabas."

Yeah, right. I was wearing a body con satin emerald dress na hanggang hita ko ang haba dahil balak kong mag bar. I also ponytails my long wavy hair and make up lightly.

Nag beso si Mama sa akin. "Ayusin mo ang naging desisyon mo, Camelia. Sinasabi ko sa 'yo."

I pressed my lips and didn't say a word. Inayos niya ang pendant ng necklace ko pagkatapos niyang ibulong sa akin 'yon. I nodded and almot rolled my eyes because how her face turned happy. As if!

Nilapitan ko si Papa sabay halik sa kanyang pisngi. "Mag-ingat ka, anak..." he whispered.

I smiled before I nodded. "I will, Papa..."

Even Papa was nonchalant, nararamdaman kong may kakampi pa ako sa pamamahay na ito. I know he was still accepting and processing everything including my mother's selfishness and bratty attitude.

I am already and adult, a twenty five yet it feels like I was still a minor and need to be guided accordingly. Para akong isang empleyado rito at hindi anak. Tangina. Hindi ko alam kung may patutunguhan pa ba itong buhay ko gayong wala akong ideya sa mangyayari pagkatapos kong maging sunud-sunuran.