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Chapter 9
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2021-03-19 10:07:41Cassandra
"Good morning, Bernie," I greet through the speak thru in the bulletproof glass.Bernie's crow's feet expand as he smiles and gives me a faint wave. A small, light brown colored stain is visible on the collar of his white uniform top. Bernie presses the buzzer and I walk through the door."Good morning, sweetheart. How are you doing today? Oh, and what do we have here?" He asks, his smile widening as his eyes narrow in on the cup holder in my hand.I giggle and hand him one of the four cups. "Iced tea, of course.""My favorite. Thank you, Cassandra. You be safe out there, okay little lady," he remarks with a gentle smile. After I return it with one of my own, I bring my hand to my forehead and act as if I'm saluting him.I enter the office and walk towards my desk. A quick glance over at Crayvin's desk, which sits empty but makes my stomach turn. All morning I've been stressing on whether or not he would remember our
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Blinded By The Past Chapter 10
CassandraSpirit week in high school was supposed to be fun. For a week, you can dress up to match the theme of the day instead of everyday school clothing. Each day allows us, students, to have fun and be nerdy without having to worry about the repercussions. Though, for me of course, it didn't go as well as I had planned. No surprise there.I finish curling my hair and add the final touch, the golden headpiece to match the dress. Today is a Disney theme, so naturally, I went with my favorite movie, Beauty and The Beast. I glide my hands over the sides of the layered ball gown and smile at my reflection. I chose not to eat for the last couple of days, hoping to fit into the dress a bit better, but with the zipper feeling as if it may blow at any moment, I guess it was no use.I turn slightly to see the back, and to my horror, my back fat is oozing over the material of the dress, the zipper about to implode.
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CrayvinToday has been anything but slow. We're barely about to reach the six-hour mark into our twelve-hour shift and we've already had thirteen calls. Granted, they've just been minor things, but still. Watching Cassandra walk out of Keva Juice with her weird-ass, green smoothie, I groan as the signal over the police scanner becomes audible once again with the dispatcher's voice.Dispatch: "Units available for possible four-five-nine, respond."Cassandra gets into the vehicle and buckles up, looking over at me and quirking her eyebrow in amusement. "Another one?" She asks.Argh."Sounds like it. Hope it's not another drunk walking around."All these damn public intoxicated calls are driving me mad. Damn Spring breakers. It's the same thing every year during this time. College kids come from all areas and party here in Phoenix and Lake Havasu.Cassandra nods her head in agreement as she
Last Updated : 2021-03-20Blinded By The Past Chapter 12
Cassandra"Sissy, I don't think the place can get any cleaner," my sister says, looking around the apartment. "Seriously, it's spotless. Besides, if you keep cleaning, you're going to be all sweaty and gross when Drew gets here, and the dinner won't be done."I stop dusting the fan and step down from the stepladder. "Shit, dinner! I need to start cooking, what time is it, Tarra?" I ask while I rush to put away the cleaning items."It's four p.m," she replies and I gasp."Shit, shit, shit!" I walk down the hall to the bathroom, my steps padding hard against the carpet. Tarra laughs in the background, her laughter echoing into the hall. "You're enjoying this way too much," I call out before closing the bathroom door.As I remove my shorts and baggy shirt, my usual outfit I wear for cleaning, I turn on the shower and wait for the water to warm up.As I take a step into the shower, Tar
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Crayvin"Official?" I ask, grunting as I set the heavy-duty barbells in my grasp down. I sit at the edge of the weight bench, lean over to grab a white cloth on the floor, and wipe the sweat from my face.Drew gets off of the treadmill, resting his hands on his narrow hips and throws his head back in exhaustion. His chest heaves with hard breaths and he's sweating as much as me.It is nice having a best friend being in the same career field as you, especially when it is crucial you stay healthy and in shape. It is also nice when said friend lives in a fancy apartment complex that has a gym that I utilize to my advantage. Normally our conversations were about the woman we slept with the night prior and the crazy, kinky things we would do, or simply discussing fuckheads that we had to deal with work. Today's conversation was far from normal, leaving me baffled beyond comprehension."Yeah, I asked her last night," he says with an exasperated
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CassandraHigh school prom was just as beautiful as I had imagined it would be, better even. Shredded styrofoam and snowflake decals covered the entire maple hardwood flooring of the high school's gym, resembling snow, to match the Frozen in Time theme for prom. Blue metallic fringe backdrops clung to the walls, snowflakes hung from the ceiling, dangling as if they were falling from the midnight sky. A mixture of silver, white, and blue metallic balloons were paired and scattered throughout the gymnasium. White lantern sets were placed on the tables, an elegant addition to the ambiance of the blue strobe light, illuminating the magical theme.I was lucky to be able to participate in prom, considering I'm only a freshman and a nobody. It pays off having a sister who's not only a senior but cool enough to take her little sister, even when half of the class had asked her to be their date."You're always looking out f
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Cassandra"All that hard work I put in during nursing school, only to have to put my finger in someone's asshole," Tarra grumbles when she walks through our apartment door.I close myCity of Fallen Angelsbook after being sunk into the words of Cassandra Clare, and set it on my lap, laughing at her greeting. I'm not hysterically laughing, but this isn't the first time she's come home tired and complaining about something she had to endure while at work. The worst incident that I can recall, was when she came home completely traumatized by a hysterectomy. Before that, I never knew what the hell a hysterectomy was, and could've gone my whole life not knowing about the details."You know, most nurses would've usually gotten used to all of this stuff by now."Tarra sets her purse down on the wooden dining table and then plops down next to me on the couch, the white cushions sinking under her weary body. "Theyact
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CassandraWhen I wake up, I'm lying belly down with my arms holding a pillow against my cheek. The pillow is soft but doesn't smell like my detergent or strawberry-scented shampoo. Instead, sandalwood and a faint smell of smoke fills my nose. I open one eye when I hear a rustling noise, then turn my body around and sit up, realizing that I'm still in Drew's room. I internally groan, knowing this is going to earn some comments from my sister."Morning," Drew says groggily, taking a seat at the edge of the bed."Morning." I pull his blue and white checkered comforter up to cover my top half. My thin camisole does little to prevent the morning chill coming from the open balcony door from hitting my chest.I watch as he finishes tying his bootlaces before leaning over to kiss me. "I've got to head to work for an extra shift, but I made a pot of coffee if you want some. I'll see you later." And with that, he leaves. Almost immediately after hi
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Crayvin"Fucking hell," I groan, grabbing a fistful of long blonde hair and winding it between my fingers as I finish in her mouth.I stare at the ceiling, exhaling as I come down from the euphoric state that the blonde has put me in after giving me head. Kelley, I think her name was? The girl I met last night at Jax's Bar looks up from her knees, gives me one more smirk, then wipes her lips. Normally after I get what I need from women, I give them some coffee or water and send them on their way with an Uber, but this blonde was persistent and wanted to make me cum one more time before she left.And who am I to refuse that?I didn't even really feel up to going to Jax's last night, but after Drew said he was having Cassandra come over, I dipped out faster than possible. Kelley just so happened to be clinging to my arm and I had nothing better to do, so why not bury myself into a cute blonde?The blonde drinks her coffee while waiting
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Blinded By The Past Chapter 75
CassandraThe last time I sat in a therapist's lobby for the first time, I was full of disbelief, destruction, doubt, and anger. My father brought me to Dr. Loraine, so I felt forced, trapped almost. Now, I see how therapy truly works if you open yourself up to it.One year since my last therapy session with Loraine, I sit in another therapist's lobby office. While again I am here not out of personal choice, my perspective is to just finish this so that I can go back on duty."Cassandra Porsse?" I rise from the chair I had been sitting in for almost twenty minutes when a tall woman calls me."That's me," I admit nervously.With a small, genuine smile, the woman tucks a piece of her toffee blonde hair that fell from her messy bun behind her ear and extends her hand. Her clothes are sleek and professional. A huge contrast to the colorful Lorraine, she wears a black conservative two-piece suit. The skirt is knee-
Blinded By The Past Chapter 74
CassandraFat ass. Short ass. Miss Piggy. Ugly piece of lard. Fat piece of shit. Oompa Loompa.These are only some of the names my peers would call me at school. Though now homeschooled, even the distance from my tormentors wasn't enough to ease all of the damage. While leaving was some relief, the memory of how I was treated also left with me like mental scars.I hate that place. I hated it so much that I nearly made Tarra late every morning as I dragged my feet every step. Up to the point before I left, I'm surprised she didn't place Dad's cuffs around my wrists to force my ass there. But she knows why I hate it. The constant bullying, the ear-deafening cackles, skinny bitches, and asshole guys are everyday torture that I succumbed to.My weakness, my attachment to the hateful comments and treatment, is what brought me here, to Loraine's office. Last night, Tarra and Dad dropped the bomb on me tha
Blinded By The Past Chapter 73
CassandraI remember when my Dad would watch UFC fights and the loud sound of fists hitting faces and crunching bones would make me cringe.None of those fights compared to the sound Tarra made when her palm connected with Drew's cheek. The echo practically radiates through our apartment and I am eternally grateful it didn't cause Crayvin -who is still tending to the burning sauce- to come running out.Tarra's fiery gaze was enough to make me want to bunker down and cower, and I wasn't even the one on the receiving end of that glare."In case that slap across your face didn't knock some sense into your dense, Marshmallow ass, I'll repeat myself. What the fuck do you want?" Tarra spits.Drew releases a tear as he brings the palm of his hand over his now reddened cheek.Pretty sure the tear isn't from the slap though."I deserved that but look, I don't want to fight. I was hoping to have a word with Cassandra," he says and th
Blinded By The Past Chapter 72
CassandraDeath is on its own clock and I could have sworn I heard the ticking stop when the bullet struck me. I will not forget the feeling of leaving everything and everyone I love. Scared shitless, I remember frantically pulling at the hem of Crayvin's shirt as I continued to bleed out, begging for him to save me. The look he gave me still shatters me to my very core, the look that reminds me of how my near-death experience nearly broke the man that I love.Though, if given the chance to save his life, I would do it all over again.When my sister rushes to the hospital, a strong sense of guilt hits me like a tidal wave when she smacks my arm after smothering me in hugs and tears. "You sissy swore we would always be there for one another. How the fuck did you expect to stand by that promise by jumping in front of a bullet? Never. Never do that to me again, Cassandra Juliet Porsse," she demands.Tarra is eerily quiet as I am finally leav
Blinded By The Past Chapter 71
CrayvinAs a police officer, I've seen a lot of shit in the past four years. I've seen the worst in some people, a lot of bad accidents and circumstances, pure evil monstrosities where bodies were involved in a pool of blood. While some days are harder than others, four years on the force hardened me against the harsh realities, like an emotional set of armor.All those years of hardened resolve were shattered the instant two bullets pierced through the body of the woman I love.My mind is going crazy from what little sleep I don't get. A recurring nightmare makes me feel as if I am stuck on a carousel, going round and round on the highest frequency. The same dream resurfaces when I close my eyes; it's never-ending. Each time the carousel circles, I see red... blotches and blotches of red.The same red that had stained Cassandra's white top when she was shot. The same blood red that coated my hands.When we get to the hospital, Cassa
Blinded By The Past Chapter 70
Tarra"Tarra, come here my love so I can get a good look at you," my mother says in an unrecognizably brittle voice, crooking her pale finger at me and motioning for me to approach.I look at my father, who gives me a weak smile and an encouraging nod. Sucking in a sharp breath of air, smelling the sterile, nearly choking environment of my mother's confined hospital room, I rise from my chair and shuffle small strides to stand by her side. Cassandra, her eyes glossy and red, kisses Mom on the cheek, then walks away. She takes my previous seat next to Dad, burying her head into him."Mom," I croak at her bedside. "Are you going to get better?"I stare at my mother's small body and dark eyes. Her beautiful features resemble my little sister so much that the comparison hurts to acknowledge.Our mother was always beautiful, full of laughter and light. Looking at her now, I don't recognize her. Wher
Blinded By The Past Chapter 69
CassandraHave you ever wanted something so badly in your life, that when you finally get it, it's taken from you just as fast? Leaving your heart completely and utterly broken. You were happy one moment, and then fucking destroyed and shattered the next.Well, me too. That's exactly how I feel now. Finally landing the guy that I have always wanted, just to lose him the second I do.Two shots were fired and there was no taking them back. Once the two bullets were released from the barrel, they had to go somewhere, right?It was like the world decided I looked too happy and in one moment the reason for my happiness was removed from my life."Crayvin!" I shriek.I drop to my knees, hitting the gravel parking lot. My pants are immediately pebbled with debris and dirt. My eyes quickly avert to Drew who charges towards Stormy. He yanks the gun from her grasp and takes her to the ground, holding her wrists behind he
Blinded By The Past Chapter 68
Cassandra"Tarra!" I call out, scrunching my nose. "Mommy and Daddy are kissing again!" I whine, deliberately forcing myself to look into the contents of my cereal bowl, rather than my disgusting, groping parents.Tarra giggles as she joins us at the table, excitement in her eyes. "I can't wait to be in love," she coos.I stick my tongue out. "Eww, gross. Boys are nasty.""You say that now because you're only ten. Wait until you grow up, you will have a whole different outlook," Tarra argues.I shake my head, dismissing that thought, because... no. All the boys in my school are gross. I have seen some pick their nose and eat their boogies, scratch their booties while at recess, and the other ones are mean. They never leave me alone. My mother and sister say it's because they have a crush on me since they act like that, but I beg to differ.If you like someone, why would you be m
Blinded By The Past Chapter 67
CrayvinWhen I manage to drag myself off of the pavement and into my house, Piggy is sitting in the foyer with droopy, sad eyes. A rush of guilt hits me like a damned truck, causing me to not be able to see clearly. A sea of thoughts floods my mind.I want approval.Acceptance.Forgiveness.I want her to see that I can, in fact, be a good guy. I don't want her to think I am some kind of monster that she has to starve herself to be with."I don't deserve you in any way, do I?" I say quietly more to myself than anything.I rake my hands through my hair, exhaling as I avert my stare to the floor.What the fuck is wrong with me?I bury myself into willing women's bodies who let me fuck my cares away. Any trauma or shit that I see at work, is gone and replaced by unchained pleasure. Uncommitted fun, no loyalties.But, then I look at Cassandra, and it's like someone releases the chains around my heart. I want to er
