1.5
He rushed to the bathroom, perhaps he was thinking that I was there. If he is looking for me, he should have thought about wearing something first. He finally walks out of the bathroom and I began to pray that he won't walk into this closet because I wouldn't know what to do if that will happen.
He stood next to the closet where I am actually hiding and my heart just leaped out of my chest and my soul begin to leave my entire body. But then he stopped and didn't continue opening the closet's door and I was saved from his phone ringing.
"Hey Leon." Hugo greets.
Hugo looks so troubled and of course he should be, seeing a bloodstain on his bed with no woman in his room would totally ruin his career. But don't worry Hugo, I won't let that happen. I will not be the reason to ruin your career even if it means hiding everything. I will forget this day even existed but I won't forget what I saw around here.
"You need to come here in my room. I need to talk to you." He keeps running his fingers through his hair.
He exhales and adds, "Yeah, it's something serious."
I gulped.
"I'll take a shower for a bit but be sure you get your ass here right away. I need to show you something before we leave." Hugo worries.
"Yeah I'm fine. Thanks man." he finally hangs up.
He sighs and finally marches his way to the bathroom with low shoulders and troubled expression on his face. I listen to him and finally hear the water running..
I need to get out of here before Leon would see me and even though I want to see Leonardo Porter, SatPat’s talented pianist, so badly, I can't. I need to go before anyone of them sees me here.
It's better if we remain anonymous.
I carefully pushed the closet door open and noticed that Hugo was really taking his shower. This was my chance to get out and save myself. I walked out of the closet and tiptoed my way to the door as quiet as I could and wished that room has no CCTV camera. I take a last look at the bed, then the entire room which makes me realize one thing, it was fine that I missed the concert, what happened in this room was much more worth than that concert ticket anyways.
Finally I headed out of his room with my head low, covering my face with my hair with the help of my hands as I continued to march away from Hugo’s room. I'm ashamed of what I could've done and what’s more frustrating is that I don’t remember anything of the things that I did to Hugo.
When I finally got inside the elevator, I was alone. I exhale heavily and place my hand over my heart. It was still beating ridiculously fast.
I gasped and felt that my neck was empty.
My necklace!
I left my necklace inside Hugo’s room! Damn it! God damn it! That has always been something important to me.
Face palm.
Way to go Miranda!
My tears were quick to fill my eyes and they started streaming down my face. I cried for a while with my head down as I kept my wiping my tears off my cheeks.
The elevator makes a sound before the door opens. I hurriedly wipe my tears with the back of my hand.
"You okay love?"
I quickly pulled my head up and saw Landon Thompson right in front of me. Am I dreaming? I want to slap my face but it's really Landon who asked me if I was okay. It's the real deal Landon who's marching inside the elevator with a rueful smile on his face. I was surprised to see him all by himself with no security around him.
He stands next to me as the door finally closes, “You okay?” He asks again.
"It's... It's..." I stutter, still starstruck.
He smiles a little wider, "Hi. I'm Landon." He introduced himself to me as if I do not know who he was.
I accepted his hand right away and I think I was still gaping in surprise. I feel him squeezing my hand but I seemed like I held onto it a little bit more. "Miranda." I croaked.
"Are you okay Miranda? Why were you crying?" He asks.
"Nothing. I’m.. I’m actually fine." I lied.
Why am I so calm?
It's Landon Thompson, my ultimate crush, but why am I not screaming or hyperventilating? I'm in one elevator alone with the freaking Landon Thompson but I'm not fangirling.
What's wrong with me?
"Are we on the lobby already?" I asked, anxiously being in the same small room with him.
He chuckles and his laugh sounded so handsome even if it doesn’t make sense but to me it is. "No.” He answers. “You were on the 25th floor when I hopped in. We're on the way to the lobby now."
I nod but my eyes were still glued to him while he stares ahead of him. I didn’t really want to be so weird in front of him but it still doesn’t sink in that we are both here and I am actually not freaking the fuck out when I was anticipating myself to be.
God Landon sure is heavenly adorable.
His head turns to me with rueful eyes, “Are you sure you're alright?"
I nod, too mesmerized by his handsome face. I didn’t even realize that he is actually pretty tall in person.
"Are you going somewhere?" He asked again.
"Home." I say. “I had a rough… night and morning.”
He nods. "I can drive you there. I mean, it’s the least thing I can do for a woman looking so sad."
My eyes dilated with his words. I swear to God, he is so perfect.
“You’re too generous.” I smile shyly as I shake my head sideways. I know how the fans would react if they see the boys with another woman and it’s something that I don’t want to be involved in.
"That would be nice but ummm.. a cab will do." I say softly.
I can't believe I'm having a causal conversation with Landon.
He nods. "Alright. I'll call you a cab. I'll tell the hotel manager to get you one to make sure you get home safe, how's that?" He smiles.
I nod.
The elevator finally opens and we were at the hotel lobby in a split second. I realized that I was inside one of the most expensive hotel in town, the one that Nina and Beth were thinking that SatPat were staying. They were damned right.
Finally walking out of the elevator, I still feel completely remorseful now that I walked the walk of shame from Hugo’s bedroom. The more I tell myself that what I did was normal, I still can’t help but blame myself for getting too drunk the night before.
Remembering Hugo’s face after seeing the bloodstain makes me hate myself for what I even went through without actually having no memories from last night. That look on his face, I think he was completely disgusted of what he saw.
He was disgusted of me.
"You sit on the couch, love. I'll get you one right away." Landon tells me.
I walked to the couch and sat down where he told me to. I waited for a while but my tears were building up again and I don’t know why in hell I was crying for.
Am I crying because I saw Landon? Am I crying because I was hurt seeing Hugo’s face from the bloodstain on his hotel bed? Or am I crying for blaming myself of what happened to me and Hugo?
"Ma’am?" I pulled my head up as soon as I heard the voice. "Mr. Thompson wants you to have this and the cab is already waiting."
I smiled back and accepted the paper.
From the corner of my eye, I see Hugo and Leon walking out of the elevator which causes my breathing to hitch in the back of my throat. Hugo looked fresher than earlier but he had his brows creased in the middle of his forehead. They were busy talking at the same time walking towards where I was. Before he can see me and recognize that I was the girl from last night, I quickly pulled myself up, thanked the attendant and headed out of the hotel as fast as I can.
I get inside the cab exasperatingly while my eyes were still glued on Hugo who is now entering the hotel’s cafe. I travelled my eyes on the small note which I remembered was from Landon.
I opened it quickly with excitement.
Miranda,
You're one beautiful woman. For whatever reason you were crying of a while ago, you'll pass through it. Don't forget to smile, love.
Always,
Landon ThompsonI smiled.
2"Miranda!"Beth and Nina exclaims in unison as they rushed towards me once I entered our hotel room. Both of them hugged me tight and I tried to smile ruefully, keeping my tears to myself but I still feel so disgusted of what I did from last night.Riding all the way back to my hotel, all I thought about inside the cab was the embarrassing things I did when I was drunk and of course how I ended up having sex with the Hugo Saintclare.Moreover, it still has not sink in that I actually talked to Landon so casually inside an elevator without screaming at his face and busting his ears. But the traumatic part is the drunken sex with Hugo. I still can't believe I gave him my virginity like a snap of a finger.The bloodstain. The look on his face, I sigh inwardly recalling about it again.In the cab, I wanted to take a three-hour shower because I feel like I'm a dirty woman, not because I had sex with Hugo but because of that shameful things that I could have done last night that I don'
2.5Both of them started screaming loudly and started pulling me back and forth as if I did something really great last night. They were happy for me. They were even happy that Hugo was the one who got my virginity. Well, it is something to be proud, I mean just of a little bit of it. because he is actually freaking Hugo fucking Saintclare from the freaking Satellite Patrol but there is still that shame since he met me in my drunken state. If he'll remember me, he will assume that I am that kind of woman and that I have always been an easy girl my whole life.Seven years later."MOM!! MOMMY!! MOM MOM MOM MOM! I can not find my Ironman shirt!""Honey it's on the top drawer!" I yelled back."Mom I can't! It's not here! Moooom!!"I grunt inwardly as I was quick enough to wipe my hands over my apron after washing the dishes. I pulled it off from my body and ran upstairs to see Benedict still wearing his black jeans with no shirt on him. All of his clothes from the top drawer were scatter
3"Nervous?" I asked Ben with a smile."I am." Ben nervously smiles back but with eagerness in his eyes."You'll be doing great on your first day baby. You always do."When we arrive at his school, I held his hand tight as we walk together to the building. I can tell he was nervous but he was trying his best not to freak out. I walk him to his classroom and to be honest, I feel like I was much more nervous than Ben when we reached his school. I know how it goes in schools and there are always going to be bullies which is one of the reasons why I am scared about. Ben’s a very nice kid and he’s too good that I am scared other kids will bully him because he doesn’t have a father.I squat down before him as I push his curly hair off from his forehead. He smiles at me sweetly and kisses my cheek then hugs me."Thank you for driving me to school for my first day mommy." He says too adorably that it’s warming my heart.I kissed his temple and pulled myself away from him as I smile back tryin
3.5When you’re a nurse, you're always needed in every part of the hospital. Everywhere. It's crazy tiring. But you know, it's a good feeling to be able to help to other people. Seeing them smiling at you and thanking you for things you do for them, it's such an amazing and extremely rewarding feeling. I love helping people just as how it also hurts me seeing a patient expire.Since high school, I wanted to be a nurse by choice because I know I can help my countrymen. I was inspired by the nurses on that movie Pearl Harbor which was really a brave thing for them to do. Ever since after I saw that movie, I wanted to be one someday.Look at me now, a licensed nurse.As the hours pass by, another tiring day came to an end and I hurriedly grabbed all of my stuff to fetch Ben. I got inside my car and drove my way to his school. When I got there, I was right on time when Ben was rushing out from his classroom. I squat down as he rushed into my arms with a smile on his face. He hugs me tight
4Hugo’s blue-green eyes were still staring at me, they look intense but at the same time calm. I think he is trying to figure out where he could have seen me or maybe he knows already about me. Did he already figure out who I am? No, it was seven years ago. There’s no way that he would remember me, that was seven years ago.Relax Miranda.Relax.Don't freak out.I'm sure he doesn't remember you. It has been seven years after what happened to the two of you. I'm sure he won't remember any of that night because I think both of us got insanely drunk.I smiled away my nervousness. "Good evening sir."Sir? I could barf at myself right now for how I address him that after having sex with him. Jesus Christ, my armpits are sweating.I guess we can actually call it as our first proper conversation because I can’t consider something that happened years ago as counted since I was intoxicated. Also, nothing comes to mind when it comes to that sinful night.I still don’t know how I acted.I clea
4.5I feel my pupils dilating after what he said but I quickly recovered from it the moment I realized that I seemed too shock. Miranda, remember he meets millions of people day by day and it’s something that you don’t have to worry about. But then hearing him say that I look familiar makes my heart leap out from my chest. I slightly pulled my arm away from him before he releases me."Sorry for grabbing you." He apologizes right away, while he puts back his hands into his pockets."It's not a big deal, sir." I answered and I still feel awkward addressing him sir.I gaze at my feet and his leather shoes were shiny as fuck that it’s too blinding. I pulled my head back up and stared at Hugo’s luring blue-green eyes which were still glued on mine."Have I seen you somewhere else before?" He asked while furrowing his eyebrows.He looks serious and I am sure he means that. Shit, he recognizes me. He freaking recognizes me!I clipped my opened mouth, "W-well... Some people always have mistak
5Being in one room with Hugo Saintclare again is very unhealthy for a woman like me who has been trying to keep my composure together.After all those years that have happened to me, I could still remember how I woke up that morning and how I got startled when I saw him on top of his own bed, naked with our clothes scattered everywhere on his hotel room floor.And God, of course his goddamn penis. I could never forget the size of that freaking thing not erected.I walked away from Anne's Presidential Suite with a heavy heart and finally felt happy now that my shift is over. I walked to the nurse's lounge to grab my stuff before leaving and tried to shake the thoughts off my head.Maybe this was a sign and chance that I should finally tell Hugo about the whole thing now?I shook the thought out of my head and decided that I shouldn’t do it.He is freaking Hugo Saintclare.Finally, I placed my hair down past my shoulders and tried to finger-comb it. Our hospital’s protocol is to always
5.5Later then I realized that I had no time for fixing my hair back up again. We rushed out of the elevator and noticed that I'm back on the floor where the Presidential suites were found."What are we doing here?" I asked as I try to catch my breath but she was still pulling me."Hurry up or else we're dead." She rushes."There would be someone else who would take care of it right? My shift is over and I don’t think I have more time to stay.” I say like I was rapping.“We need to hurry it’s a VIP!”She claims.“A what?” I gaped. “I thought there's code zero? Wait, you mean a VIP just died and--""We'll be in code zero if I can't bring you with me." She clarifies.."What?" I gaped."Come on!"My hair was completely everywhere. She opens a door right away without me noticing the second we stopped. I looked like a complete shit. Even before I can say anything, she opens a door without even asking me if I agreed to this or not.“Let--”I stiffened the second I saw Hugo standing by the si
87 T H E A Sebastian committed suicide. He ended his own life with a gun in his head. No one even knew how he had a gun in the first place and no one had any idea he was going to do that. He was supposed to meet Ben and the others tomorrow for a reunion. He was supposed to live a new life after being sentenced in prison for seven years. He was supposed to live in a tropical place and start a new life for himself. He was supposed to live a life filled with dreams now that he is out in prison. Sebastian was supposed to live. I was supposed to forgive him. The autopsy report stated that it happened around twelve midnight which means just a few hours after he left our home. I have never felt so depressed in my entire life that I wasn't even able to tell him a lot of things that I wanted to say. I didnt know what I was exactly feeling, completely lost in my thoughts and emotions after Sebastian's passing. I knew that there was something wrong in his eyes when he talked to me becaus
86T H E A"How have you been?" He asks.Sebastian wore blue, white and light pink plaided top, a pair of faded jeans and a dirty white sneakers. He looked older than the last time I saw him and his hair has gotten longer too. He looked different, but those eyes still frightens me.Those merciless eyes.I couldn't stare at him longer and I had to look away from his gaze. I clear my throat, "I have been well." I answered."I'm really glad that you are." Sebastian tells me."Um, do you want to drink something Sebastian? Tea?" Ben offers.I quickly held his wrist, stopping him from leaving me alone in here and stared into his eyes as I said to him. "Please don't leave me here."Ben stares intently at me before he turns to Sebastian who speaks, "You dont really have to offer me anything."I bite my inner cheek and breathe in some confidence before I faced Sebastian. "What are you doing here?"Sebastian stares at me eagerly."What do you want?" I asked firmly."I came here to see if you ha
85T H E AI couldn't sleep the entire night as I was bothered about Sebastian's release happening in just a few hours.Thoughts were filling and piling inside my head one over the other and I don't know if this was going to let me sleep at all.So I slipped out of the bed where Ben was sleeping soundly and headed out of bedroom to get myself a glass of wine from downstairs. I hate myself when I turn to alcohol every time my thoughts are fogged up and fucked up. I hate when there are questions left unanswered and my solution is alcohol.I hated it.I hated it so much I hate myself too.I finished two glasses of wine and spent almost thirty minutes just sitting on a chair where I tried to drown and sort my troubled thoughts. I finally pulled myself up and headed back to my bedroom only until I saw Xavier heading out of his room, crying. I rushed to his side and wished that he wouldn't smell the stingy scent of alcohol from my breath."Xavier." I cooed. "What happened?""Mommy I had a n
84T H E A“Why didn’t you tell him?”Benedict's question still lingers in my mind.Why didn't I tell Sebastian back in the day?I have been asking myself that same question over and over again for the past couple of years. I used to tell myself that I wasn't ready and I know I wasn't ready. I lied to myself when I said I was ready to confess to him about our child but I was absentmindedly denying the fact that my mind was filled with so many thoughts as soon as I faced Sebastian.When I saw him, I was reminded of how he raped me mercilessly. When I saw him, I was reminded of how dirty of a woman I was. When I saw him, I was reminded of how I didn't want this baby to be born if only it hadn't been for Ben.Ben has always been my rock and my strength after everything that happened to me. All these years, he accepted me no matter what and I have been beyond blessed to have a man like that in my life.That kind of love and care he showed me is going to be something I didn't want to waste
83T H E AI stare at my own reflection in front of the mirror, I gained weight but I look different compared to the old me a few weeks ago. My eyes travelled down to my baby bump and as I turn to my side, I feel more anxiety building in the back of my head. I am not confident enough that I will be a good mother to this baby once it’s out when I know this baby came from a man who I trusted so much but just raped me. My bump is starting to show now and I know I have a lifelong responsibility waiting ahead of me. I just hope I will be responsible enough.I rub my hand over my small tummy then smiled at myself.“You will be fine.” I told my baby.Ben is here for me and for us. He always has. He made everything feel better. He made me better and happier without asking too much in return. He is a very selfless man and I owe him my life. My everything and all that I have left.I breathe out heavily and tucked my hair behind my ears as I stare at myself wearing this white dress and white ba
82B E N E D I C TShe stands by the balcony sliding door, staring at an empty space wearing my shirt and some pajamas. Standing here afar from Thea, looking at her, I can see and I can feel that her mind is full. It’s full of endless thoughts and worries. I wish I could take some from her restless bothered thoughts and I wish I could help her with what she is going through.Thea is strong but I don’t want her to have another breakdown. I hope I can share the pain and confusions she is going through right now. I wish, at least I could make her happy despite of what has happened lately.But I don’t know what to do as well.I am bothered too, restless, anxious, troubled and angry. I still have this growing hate in me and unwillingness to befriend Sebastian.I hate him.I walk towards Thea and wrapped my arms around her. She didn’t budge but still sets her eyes out the window. “There are no stars tonight.” I say.She sighs heavily.“Aren’t you hungry sweetheart?” I ask.She didn’t answer
81B E N E D I C T“The CEO of Saintclare Enterprises , finally off the market!!”I read mentally the newspaper’s headlines as soon as I got into my office. I scan through the magazines which were also over my desk, and the headlines were also all about me.I sigh. “I knew this was gonna come out first thing in the morning.”The phone on top of my desk rings, I quickly picked it up, “Yes.”“Mr. Saintclare everyone is calling in for an interview with you. They’re all asking if you have any available time.” I can hear telephones ringing from my secretary’s background.“Cancel all interviews. Tell them I have a busy schedule up until next week.” I hung up.Suddenly the phone in my pocket rings. I stare at the screen and it was Mrs. Brown, my PR.I sigh as I answer, “I know what you’re going to say.”“It’s everywhere. My phone has been ringing since six o’clock this morning. I don’t know what to answer them.”“Did you say anything about Thea?”“No. Not unless you tell me to. I’m only wait
80BENEDICTI stare at Thea, and she has been looking out of the window for minutes now. I know she still has a lot of things in mind with what has happened lately and I’m sure she’s tired of thinking about it too. She has talked to Khaleel and I have had talked to him too. Despite her past, we wanted to keep it to ourselves than letting the others know about it. They wouldn’t understand what she went through to survive and it isn’t our story to tell.I have asked myself a couple of times why she had to choose such job but then I didn’t have the courage to ask her. I don’t want her to feel bad about herself and the more I ask about her past, the more she would think it bothers me.Honestly, it has been in the past and we all have had done crazy shit a thing or two. All of us deserves a second chance and women like Thea who strives hard to change herself to become a better woman deserves more than that. I am proud of her and she knows it.A smile creeps on her face as soon as I rubbed
79THEASometimes, in our lives there are instances when you just want to disappear because of awkward situations or embarrassing moments. And right now, that’s what I want to happen. I want to teleport to another place far from here.It feels like everything inside my system malfunctioned and brain feels dead. I have never felt more disgusted of myself and my past than how Sebastian is embarrassing me right now in front of Ben. No one has ever made me feel so little of myself, only Sebastian.This bastard. This one of a hell man. I wish he dies.My tears were just flowing from my closed eyes and I feel this growing pain against my chest. I try to breathe in but the pain grows as I exhale so I remained quiet. I don’t want to face anyone or see how they look at me with disgust and filth. I just want to disappear like one pop of a bubble or run out of this house and never look back.But I cant, I know I have to face them now. I have to face Khaleel. I have to face Benedict even if it’s