AYLA | THEN He is crazy. She is going to kill him for sure. He even locked her in the car, went to the department store and bought condoms. Not just one but ten. She will kick him on the bed and lock him in the washroom. Then she will sleep while he begs her to open the door. "I swear, Jayden. If you don't take me home today, I might kill you accidentally." "I am taking you, home." He said so casually without giving a second thought about what his words were doing to her, they were giving her hope which she didn't want. "I am not ready for this." She yelled. "You're more than ready." She was. She is. She knows it. She also knows how addictive his touch can be, how blissful his kisses can be and how peaceful she'll be with him. She will be addicted to happiness. That's what her relationship is with him, pure happiness. That's what makes it more precious and fragile. It can be broken. A month away from turning eighteen Ayla already knows that she wants forever w
AYLA | NOW I hugged my diary and wiped my tears. I had something I thought I'd never have: a father figure, a brother, and a man, my man who loved me unconditionally and who protected me."Nothing you do will make him leave you." Henry told her. And somehow I did something that made him leave. But he came back for me. He said that he came back for me six months after he left, which is exactly two months after I woke up, and he saw me in Blake's arms. That must have hurt. He felt betrayed. I think I can finally see his pain. He was ready to give Ayla a chance even though he believed that his father died because of her. His love is incomparable. How did I get that lucky? How did it all go down? For now, I closed the dairy. My body and mind were desperate to see him, see the guy who gave me the world, and nothing about him changed now, even though I didn't remember him. I squealed in joy as I got ready for the office, putting some extra effort into my hair and make-up. I chose a two-p
AYLA | NOW My hands are clammy. I stared at the road ahead, sitting in Jayden’s fancy car. The speed hit over 70, and when the hood of the car opened without me asking for it, I released a breath of relief. I closed my eyes, my face towards the sky, and the wind swayed my hair. It’s going to be a mess, I’m sure. But I enjoyed this moment. The wind, the freedom, the thud in my chest, the moment of no thoughts, the clarity in my bones, I love everything about this moment. Did I ever think that I would have someone to depend on completely? That’s exactly what I am doing. I am trusting him with my heart, and my body. I am going to take the leap of faith in him, in us, and I hope fate plays in our favour. We entered into a sumptuous upscale street with many apartments and villas here and there. Either side of the road is lined up with maple trees. I bet it looks more beautiful in the daytime. Jayden stopped the car in front of a tower. Of course, it’s a skyscraper, or how else w
Alya’s chest heaved up and down with every step her foot touched the ground. Sweat formed on the little of her cleavage shown from her sleeveless top. The song playing on her headset is nothing more than a constant buzz like an indistinctive noise when one is crowded. Her mind wandered somewhere along with her legs. She stopped at the first turn her eyes caught. Every time, she encounters a turn, she wouldn’t risk taking it, because she knows that she would lost. Sometimes, the turn appears just after two minutes of running. She would go back to her car and runs in a nearby park as long as she is not tired. Sometimes, she would go beyond miles. She has run for four miles today. She was going to turn around when her shoes stopped in the midway spotting a lady who just got from a car. “Tamam, tamam. seni geri arayacağım,janam. Hoscakal.” She heard the woman say on the phone before she hung up. As soon as Ayla
“Anne I felt weird. Everything I saw is so real. It made me think that it is my accident itself. Kemal would say that I am imagining things. But I think they are my memories. Even if you think it is crazy, they all triggered after the word, ‘Jayden.’ When I stepped out of the building, a drizzle hit me. I looked up into the sky and suddenly felt naked as if someone is watching me standing somewhere in the balcony of sky scrapers. I feel like this universe is sending me some message and I can’t understand it. It is 1:00 AM. I couldn’t sleep. It is raining heavily and I still have my windows open. I miss you and I don’t know why I miss Nottingham, especially the river Trent. Maybe, it has to do something with my regular dream in which I stand in a harsh rain waiting for someone. Funny, right? Bilmezdim.” She felt dizzy like she woke up from a long sleep when the fact is Ayla only slept for four hours. Her dairy is under her chin. She started to rewind what happened last
PRESENT DAY “Are you crazy? You turned him down? I pull out all the stops to get this done. I thought you both will be compatible. He pretty much fell for you as soon as he saw you. And you turned him down!” Quinn’s hands are spread in the air while she stood on her best friend’s bed. “Every girl at my office drools over him.” “I think I am not every girl at your office.” Ayla replied plainly while bending her body to tie her shoe lace. She is all set to go for a run, before Quinn barged into her house unannounced. “You are like 24 and you are still single, Ayla. You are not enjoying your life to fullest. You are like a typical girl from typical novels. This......" She continued all her theories on leading a life. Last night, Quinn set her up with a friend of her. He is cute, handsome, and smart and all the things a girl wants. But Ayla found zero interest in his "good" jokes. It is like a part of her is missing. There's some hole, something empty, some kind o
PRESENT DAY ‘Physically shot, emotionally hit Ready, aim, you get the party lit I'm shaken to the core, my defenses are shit Under siege, I'm marching to your beat You're staring at me, so damn piercing Got under my skin like a tattoo Let's keep going 'til hell's freezin' To get to heaven just take these two’ Maybe, it is a bad idea to listen to her favorite songs after all. Whether it is her vivid imagination or it is fate’s play, every lyric started to mean, especially, they are pointing out her situation. She switched off her speakers and removed her sweater. The top beneath was displaced when she did that and a part of her cleavage is displayed where the tattoo lay. It is a Korean word that contains, don’t know how many letters. The first letter is, 에which sounds ai, the next letter is so vague, as she got a wound there due to the accident. Everyone believed that the word is Ayla. As far as she remembered, her mother would kill her if she has a tattoo near her hear
Ayla is riding her car on the wide wet roads of London crowded with vehicles. Her heart is thumping out of anticipation of what is going to happen once she reaches her office. As she drove into a peaceful street, she saw a teen covering her head with a yellow colored raincoat on the side pathway. The girl shoved her hands into pockets of her skirt and walking slowly when someone from behind came running and removed her coat off her head. She didn’t say anything and walked like that. The girl reminds Ayla of herself. She has been through many harsh things when she was a teen. She grew up with her mom in Istanbul. When she is old enough, she started questioning her mom about her father. He was somewhere in Europe. Every time she asked about him, her mom used to smile. Just a smile, a smile of assurance saying that she was there and Ayla doesn't need anyone. And that made her feel secured enough. She was sixteen when her mom took her to Ankara for a tour. She started to