Chapter No 15 I do not believe In Love

She was shaking with fear when he lifted her up and brought her out of the building.

“You are not going to live here after this,” he said, worried and adjusting her passenger seat.

She was still shaking.

He got in the car and started driving, he was looking at her with worried expressions as if he was checking if she was all right.

After 30 minutes of driving, they reached his mansion. She slowly got out of the car and walked towards the Garden.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“I want to live alone for a while” she said shortly and walked ahead. He was staring at her back when she had gone lost inside the darkness. He took a deep breath, put out his phone, and dialed a number.

******

“I love Matilda, you are love of my life” his voice was surrounding inside her mind. She put her hands over her ear. He confessed in a moment where he thought he lost her.

“No, it can’t be, no I hate love, no I can’t believe in love,” she repeated to herself.

She was sitting on the swing, she was feeling a bit tired while fighting with herself.

******

There was ambient silence in the room. She was sleeping while he was sitting on the bed working on some project. After a while he shut down the laptop and grabbed the business book from the side table. He had a habit of reading before going to bed.

“No,no,.” she murmured. She got alert.

“Matilda? Are you okay?” he asked while bending on her face. She was breathing restlessly.

“No….You can’t do it,” she muttered.

“I have ruined my life by marrying you,” she heard male’s voice.

“Why don’t you die and take your dirt in the name of children with you?” the woman screamed.

“Noooooooo” three women screamed. A very memory she wanted to erase. Her worst nightmare. Memories were the reason for her anxiety.

She saw a five year old in chaos. Two men were fighting, beating each other, all she could hear were screams, and then she saw a five-year-old girl running on the streets.

“How dare you?” a man beats her badly.

“No I will not come, I promise I will not come down please don’t beat me,” she was screaming in her dreams. Easton holds her shoulders and shakes her.

“Matilda, wake up” he said, worried.

She was crying as if she was in pain. She opened her eyes and looked at him in disbelief. She got up in a rush and looked around her surroundings,

“Mr. Easton? What am I doing here?” she asked worriedly.

“You fell asleep in the garden” he said shortly.

Her heart was still beating fast. The nightmares were back, the nightmares she wanted to leave behind. We all have a past but it follows us if it’s abusive. She took a deep breath.

He holds her shoulders and looks inside her eyes.

“Matilda, I am here, tell me what is it?” he asked, there was something in his voice and eyes that made her freeze at the spot, she slowly set his hands off her.

“Mr. Easton,” she said as if she was trying to find words.

She got out of bed.

“I, I can’t fall in love with anyone” she said without looking at him.

He got out of the bed and turned her face towards him.

“Matilda, what is it? I have always observed there is something you are hiding, what is it?” he asked expressionlessly.

“Mr. Easton, it’s nothing, but the truth is I don’t believe in love, love is an abomination, it’s an abuse to yourself” she said bitterly. He looked inside her eyes, they were as still as stone.

“Before meeting you, I also believed that love is nothing, an abomination but now I realize what it is, when I came to know you,” he said.

“Mr. Easton, you are not understanding, all those years, I have been avoiding this, I can’t believe it, it’s something cursed” she said and turned towards the door.

“I am sorry Mr. Easton and I am leaving tomorrow, please don’t try to find me,” she said and left the room.

He was staring at the place where she was a minute ago.

He kicks over the decoration piece and breaks everything inside the room.

******

She packed everything and was ready to leave. Once again, she was leaving because she was escaping something. Something she has hated most in her entire life.

She picks up her handbag when something falls off. She picked it up and it was a purple ring box, she opened it and a beautiful ring shined over her face. She has chosen a ring for her fake engagement with Easton. She smiles.

“The girl would be lucky, who will wear this,” she thought and put the box inside her bag, she decided to parcel it through services.

She looked around her looted apartment and rolled her eyes.

“Living here was the wrong decision,” she thought and went out of the building.

“I should tell Jim too, that I am moving to another town and I will send him the address later,” she thought.

She took her phone out and was about to dial when her phone started ringing.

It was Stella.

“Why is she calling me after years?” she thought and picked it up.

“Hy Matilda, I hope you are doing fine,” said Matilda.

“Yeah I am fine, how are you?” she asked.

“Fine, hy I find something today,” she said from the other side.

“What?” she asked.

“Do you remember the other night?” Stella asked.

“How would I forget?” she said bitterly.

“Well that day you happened to kiss a random guy,” said Stella.

“Yeah Jim told me the other day” she said heartlessly.

“Well, I have found your video, kissing that guy in Sam’s phone, I thought you might be interested,” she said excitedly.

Matilda has rolled her eyes.

“Yeah so much interest, dying, please send me,” she said without any expressions.

“Okay I am sending you, you should check and by the way, he is hot” Stella said from the other side.

“If he is that hot you should find him,” she thought angrily.

“Okay Stella I got to go, I have to do something, will talk to you later” she said and hung up the phone.

“He is hot,” she said while mimicking Stella.

****************

She got a taxi to reach the airport, and was now peacefully sitting in the passenger seat, thinking about his time in this city.

“Maybe I am taking right decision, I mean it would be better for Mr. Easton that I am leaving, he will forget about his stupid feelings about me,” she thought while touching her bag softly.

“Matilda,” she heard his voice in her ear and went startled.

“No no, why am I hearing him?” she thought and put the earphone on.

It was some romantic song over the Radio, and she automatically starts thinking about him.

She put the earphones down and was irritated. She decides to look out of the window enjoying the view until she reaches the airport.

At the huge building she saw Fanaggaen company’s banner, he was standing arrogantly beside his name. She closed her eyes forcefully.

“Why on the earth do I see him everywhere?” she screams.

Cab driver looks at her from the back view mirror.

After 20 minutes, the cab stopped in front of the airport. She got out and walked towards the waiting chairs.

“I am leaving again, running from my dark past, I have to do it but I am feeling so sad?” she thought.

“Why I am feeling like I have left an important part behind” she was stretching her ID card.

“Do I love him?” she asked herself.

She was feeling very anxious.

“Hello my dear, Are you okay?” asked an elderly woman who sat next to her.

“Yeah I am fine, thanks for asking,” she said smiling.

“I am going back after years,” said the woman, smiling.

“Where are you doing?” she asked.

“Italy” said the woman.

“I left Italy, when I received the news that my husband died in a war,” she said while looking at the counter.

“Oh I am so sorry,” she said sadly.

“No, don’t be, not at all, when I found that he is killed during the war, I was so much broken, our daughter and grandchildren lives here, so they call me here, I wanted to escape that place, that was haunting me with his memories, the time we have spent together, so I left Italy and moved here twenty years ago, I have spent my these twenty years with his ghost,” she said while smile.

Matilda felt sorry for the woman.

“Do you miss him?” she asked.

“Yeah I do, because he never left me during these years and until last week, I got him back,” she said while looking at the ticket counter. Unconditionally Matilda looks in the direction where she was looking as a tall elder man walked towards their direction.

He bends down and kisses the woman.

“Oh Albert, you have never changed,” said the woman.

“Who is this pretty girl?” he asked while pointing at Matilda.

“I don’t know her name, she was sitting here, reminds me of me when I was her age, remember when I was waiting for you at the airport, you were coming back from the training?” she asked. Albert has sat with her.

“Matilda, my name is Matilda,” she said, smiling.

“Wow such a lovely name, our granddaughter has the same name” he said smiling.

“Why were you sad Matilda?” she asked.

“I am sad because I am leaving this town” she said sadly.

“You don’t want to leave?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” she said softly.

“Well, when we don’t know something, then definitely love is involved, do you love someone?” he asked.

She remained quiet.

“I don’t know if I do or not, but I am afraid of love,” she said.

“My dear sweet girl, love is not something to be afraid of, it is indeed something you should embrace,” said the woman.

“Megan? Do you remember when our daughter was afraid too, because she does not want to get married and have children?” he said.

“Yeah I remember,” she said softly.

“So how did you find out your husband is alive?” she asked curiously.

“Ah that, I did not die in war, instead I went into a coma for twenty years and when I got my consciousness back, I went home and came to realize Meg has gone, so I showed up here surprising her,” he said cheerfully.

“I have almost lost the love of my life and look I got him back and I will spend every inch of my life to be with him” said Megan.

These two were in their seventies but their love was as young as it is.

Then they heard someone calling a name hysterically.

“Marcus, Marcus where are you, I have come for you, I realize that I love you Marcus,” a tall black haired girl who was wearing a wedding dress was calling someone’s name.

“Marcus, I know it’s too late, I know you are here Marcus, I wanted to say I love you” she said with tears in her eyes. But no one has appeared. She turned silently when a deep manly voice called her name.

“Lena?” she turned, a smile appeared over her face.

A tall man who had light brown hair and had an undercut hairstyle ran towards her and hugged her tightly. They shared a passionate kiss.

“Oh baby I found you” she said and both left.

“Sometimes love finds its way lately but it does” said Albert while Megan smiled.

“Love is something pure and difficult to emerge, it lives deep inside our heart, we just have to feel it” he said.

They both got up.

“Seems like it’s our flight time, we have to go” said Megan, she looked up.

They both looked perfect together.

“You need to find that in your heart” said Megan and kissed her over her forehead and Albert smiled. She smiled in return. They both left.

Her phone vibrates. It was a message from Stella. “Oh Gosh she must have sent me the video from that doomed day” she said disappointed and played the video.

As much as she was watching the video her expressions turned solid.