Ch. 2 Reality Check

Katalina's POV

If losing my mom and witnessing my dad’s suffering wasn’t enough to make me swear off ever accepting a mate bond, my relationship with Jesse Klein put the nail in that proverbial coffin. 

Jesse, or Alpha Klein these days, was just what I needed right when I needed him. His dad was the Alpha and my dad was his Beta so we grew up together since the time we were infants. Gamma Thorn’s kids, Tyler and Larissa, as well as Sarah Woods, the Head Omega’s daughter, rounded out our inseparable little band of troublemakers. On any given day, we could all be found tearing through the pack house together playing tag or hide and seek, creating havoc in the kitchen while making cookies with Sarah’s mom, or engaging in some other mischievous activity.

Jesse, Tyler, Sarah and I were the same age and we all just clicked from day one. Larissa was a couple years younger but she could always be found tagging along with her older brother. We were all best friends. Then as our sixteenth birthdays approached, something changed between Jesse and I. All of a sudden, I was hyper aware of how attractive he was. The way he always ran his hands through his sandy blonde hair or the way his bright green eyes always seemed to sparkle entranced me. And I was constantly fighting myself to keep from running my hands all over the muscles bulging under his tan skin.

From there we started having progressively flirty conversations, until several weeks later when Jesse finally asked me out on a date. It was that first date that sealed my fate. After that, I knew I would never want anyone but Jesse Klein.

For the next four years, he barely left my side. We spent every spare minute together as our love continued to grow. When mom passed away a few months after my birthday, Jesse was there to pick me up. I knew with every fiber of my being that he was the reason I survived my mom’s passing and my father’s living death. 

When Jesse turned eighteen a few months before me, he started making plans for our future in earnest. He was convinced that as soon as my birthday arrived, we would finally find out that we were mates officially. We would get married and the whole pack would know I was their future Luna. Unfortunately, we were both in for disappointment. 

The morning of my birthday came and as soon as Jesse pulled into my driveway I rushed out to meet him, eager to feel the connection of our mate bond. Instead, it was instantly apparent that the Moon Goddess hadn’t chosen us for each other. Although I had always loved his scent of warm leather and fresh fallen rain, he didn’t smell any stronger to me. And his touch, though still warm and soothing, did not produce the tell-tale sparks of the mate bond.

I started sobbing right there in the driveway. I knew how much Jesse was looking forward to our bond snapping into place that day and I was terrified he would leave me. But he just pulled me into his arms and walked me back into the house, whispering to me the whole way that it didn’t matter. He kept saying over and over, “I’m never leaving you, ever!” I believed him. 

As soon as we got inside Jesse sat down, pulling me into his lap and kissing every inch of my face and neck while telling me how much he loved me. I begged him to go ahead and mate and mark me as his chosen mate but he refused, saying he wanted it to be special and not when I was so upset.

I’d hoped that day would come soon but his parents had other plans. The next morning, I went to the pack house early to surprise Jesse with his favorite muffins for breakfast. But as I neared his bedroom, I was the one who ended up surprised.

“That’s not fair! Lot’s of wolves take chosen mates. Why shouldn’t I get to choose who I want to be with?” Jesse shouted at someone.

“Yes, Lot’s of wolves do, but not lots of Alphas.” Jesse’s dad answered tersely. “Alpha’s are stronger with their fated Lunas. It’s your responsibility to do what’s best for this pack!”

“Son, just wait to mate and mark Kat until your twentieth birthday. If you haven’t found your mate by then, we will give your chosen mate our full endorsement with the pack. Just give the Moon Goddess until then to reveal your path. That’s all we ask.” His mother’s voice was soft, gentle. But the message was the same. I did not have their support.

“And if I don’t wait?” Jesse challenged.

“Then we will not sanction your choice. And without it, you know the pack won’t either.” His dad stated with finality.

I could hear footsteps coming my way but I was frozen in place. His parents looked surprised to see me standing in the hall but said nothing. Luna only offered me a weak smile as they both walked by me. 

It would be a long two years, but we both knew it would be important to have the full endorsement of the current ranked members. So we waited.

Fast-forward two years. The ceremony inducting Jesse as Alpha was wonderful. The whole pack was there and everyone was so excited to welcome their new leader. I had never been prouder! Tyler took over for my dad as Beta at the same time so it was a double celebration.

Jesse and I planned a short trip for the next weekend when we would finally solidify our chosen bond. To say I was excited was the understatement of the century! We had been through so much together over the last four years and both felt we had earned our happily-ever-after. 

Jesse never missed a chance to run his fingers along my neck and whisper to me, “Soon Love, I’m going to put my mark right here for everyone to see and you’ll be mine forever!” That was all I ever wanted. All I needed to finally feel complete.

Unfortunately, the Moon Goddess had other plans. Tyler’s parents were having a party to celebrate his induction as the new Beta. His sister Larissa had also just come home from four years of studying abroad at an all-girls boarding school so it was a dual celebration. As our new Alpha, Jesse had to attend but we wanted to go regardless since Tyler was one of our best friends and the rest of our little gang would be there as well.

As soon as we walked in the front door my whole world fell apart. Jesse immediately froze and his eyes turned black as his wolf, Ares, sniffed the air. He nearly ripped my arm off when he yanked his hand out of mine and pushed through the crowd to get to his mate. He stopped right in front of Larissa and growled, “Mine!”

In the next moment, he had her pushed up against the wall kissing her passionately. The same way he had kissed me just moments before we arrived. I couldn’t move. All I could do was stand there and stare. My heart refused to believe what my eyes were seeing. 

I always knew the mate pull was strong, but I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that four years of our lives, years completely devoted to each other, could be erased instantaneously. So I just stood there, waiting for him to come to his senses and remember me while everyone stared at the scene playing out in front of them.

Thankfully, my best friend Sarah saw what was happening and had the good sense to get me out of there. 

“Come with me, Kat. You don’t need to stay here and watch this.” She grabbed my arm and pulled me out the door. 

I stumbled along behind her numbly until she shoved me into her car and drove me to her house. The minute she closed the door to her bedroom I fell on her bed and let the floodgates open. I’m not sure how many hours I laid there and cried, but Sarah stayed with me, quietly rubbing my back the whole time. 

Once again, a fated mate bond was destroying my life. When my tears finally ran dry, I knew two things unequivocally: 1. I hated the Moon Goddess Selene and her damn “fated mate” bullshit. And 2. I would never, ever allow anyone the opportunity to break my heart again!

In the weeks following that night, Jesse tried several times to see me but I refused every time. 

“He’s here again. What should I tell him this time?” Sarah sounded exasperated as she barged through her bedroom door, startling me out of my trance-like state. I turned to face her, staring back blankly.

“Tell him I’m not here. Tell him I’m gone and you don’t know where I went. I don’t care what you say as long as I don’t have to see him.” My voice was flat, unemotional.

I was numb, empty. Jesse had left me standing in the doorway alone and humiliated, not even sparing me a second thought after four years together. Leaving me with nothing. I would not give him one more minute of my time.

Now, a year later, parts of me were still irrevocably broken. My heart may have never fully healed, but I resolved a long time ago to give my all to my career as a midwife and to the important people in my life. Lately, I finally felt like I was getting back to the fun-loving, sassy girl I used to be. I was actually enjoying life again, not just pretending too. I wanted to hang on to that!

As I dragged myself up the stairs to my room, weariness from my long night had finally set in. I thought about fighting through the fatigue, changing into workout clothes and attending a training session with the pack warriors. 

Soon after Jesse found his mate, my wolf, Cara, and I had a lot of emotions to work through. Training had been the perfect outlet for my anger and frustration. At first, I could barely make it through a whole session without my muscles turning to jelly. Over time though, I grew stronger and faster. 

It had been a year since I started training and I was in the best shape of my life. I was one of the strongest she-wolves in our pack and I could definitely hold my own in a fight. Training was something I did for myself and I was addicted to it.

Ultimately though, I decided to skip it in favor of a nice long nap. As exhausted as I was, I was glad I took the time to walk home and think about my past and what I wanted for my future. It was too easy to see what people like the Andersons had and let it suck me in, making me forget how loving someone gave them the power to crush you. I needed a reality check. 

As I laid in bed drifting off to sleep, I thought about how thankful I was that I had never met my fated mate. That kind of love was a fantasy meant for a lucky few.  With a renewed resolve to keep my feet firmly planted in reality, I closed my eyes and let sleep take me.