chapter 12

Mira's POV.

I forced myself back to my feet, with the help of Beta Ethan who was looking at me with undisguised pity in his eyes.

“Are you okay?” His voice was low, concerned. “I don’t know what Navier was thinking, making you run a hundred laps on your first day of training.” His frustration blends into his tone.

I offered him a weak smile and nodded, but I didn’t dare sign. If I did, I knew I’d break down completely.

I felt the weight of stares from the warriors nearby. Some looked at me with pity, others with barely concealed anger. Their Luna, a weakling. I dropped my gaze to the ground, my stomach twisting.

They must resent me and probably sympathize with their Alpha for being saddled with a mate like me. No one wanted a liability.

I smiled at him weakly, nodding in response to his question. I knew that if I tried to sign, I would only break down in tears.

Ethan’s voice pulled me from my thoughts. “You should get that wound checked at the hospital,” he said, nodding toward my scraped arm. “You don’t want it getting infected.”

I nodded again, even though I had no intention of going. Carrie worked at the hospital, and the last thing I wanted was another encounter with her. Besides… I hated needles.

“You can just leave them here, You don't have to worry about taking it back. I will have someone to take care of it.” He pointed at the gears I was struggling to carry.

“Thank you.” I signed to him, and headed for the packhouse.

It has been a long time since anyone has stood up for me. First it was Mama T, last night during dinner and now Ethan. I couldn't help but let a small smile spread across my face.

I want or rather I wished Navier could accept me, and love me like a mate should, but I knew that was just wishful thinking. All Navier had for me in affection was pure hatred and disgust.

I walked back to the packhouse and headed straight to the kitchen to get started cooking dinner before he insults me or does far worse to me for not bringing his food on time.

“Hey,” Hen greeted me, the instant I stepped into the kitchen.

I smiled and waved back. “Hey.”

I walked to where she was mixing a huge bowl of flour. I wonder why the head chef didn't request for modern kitchen equipment that will make our work easier and faster.

“I’ve been looking for you.” Hen kept her voice low, stealing glances toward the head chef, Ellen. “Where have you been?”

“I was outside training,” I signed.

When I saw the confused expression on her face, I demonstrated a punching scene with both my hands punching into the air.

“Wait!’ she held up her hand. “You were outside training on the field, right?” She asked and I nodded yes.

I nodded.

Her face twisted in horror. “Why the hell would you do that? Shouldn’t you be in the kitchen honing your cooking skills instead of—” Her voice trailed off as her eyes scanned my battered hands. “Look at you! Are you insane? Do you want to kill yourself?”

“It’s the Alpha’s orders.”

She didn’t understand my signs, and I could see her growing frustration at not being able to understand what I was saying.

“I can’t believe you actually want to be a warrior.” She huffed but then smiled. “I mean, I guess it’s kinda cool.”

I forced a smile, swallowing the painful lump in my throat. If only she knew.

I didn’t want to be a warrior. That my own mate forced me to train to punish me for being mated to him.

That I wanted to be a healer, a doctor. I wanted to help people.

But none of that mattered anymore. I was stuck in this life. With a mate who hated me.

After working tirelessly for hours, Hen called on Ellen to inspect the food before we served it. She cut a slice of steak and moaned as she chewed it.

“Wow, this is so good. Hen you did an amazing job with the seasoning.” She smiled and praised Hen, as if we didn't cook it together.

I hung my head in embarrassment, as I heard a mocking laughter from the other maids in the kitchen. Their laughter confirmed my suspicion that Ellen praised Hen on purpose, to belittle me and make me feel worthless.

But I wasn't the least bit jealous or heart broken, because it's a feeling I was used to from my old pack. No one cared about Mira the Mute even though I did all the work.

“Mira, you're In charge of feeding the warriors.” She glared at me and smiled at Hen. “You can go home after you eat.”

“I don't know where the warriors quarters are.” I wanted to sign out in frustration.

But I decided against it. Ellen would only use this as an opportunity to insult me and reestablish what she told Mama T that I'm unfit to work with her.

“Come on,” Hen whispered, as Ellen turned her back. “I’ll show you where it is.”

“Thank you,” I exhaled in relief and filled up my tray with food.

“Remind me to show you around the packhouse tomorrow, when I'm back from school. I don't want you to get lost whenever you're sent on errands without me.” Hen suddenly said.

“I really appreciate your help.” I signed as we walked out of the packhouse.

If Hen hadn't come to my rescue today, I probably would have gotten lost, no one would have helped me. I was grateful for having a friend like her.

At least life here won't be as horrible as the life I endured at my father's pack, with friends like Hen and Mama T.

After we finished serving the warriors, and on our way back to the packhouse, I met Mama T with a worried expression on her face.

“Mira, where have you been? I went to the kitchen to look for you but Ellen said you've not been around.” She rushed out at once.

What is she talking about? I stared at her in confusion. Why would Ellen lie about not seeing me in the kitchen all afternoon? I thought to myself.

“Ellen is a liar, she sent us to serve the warriors.” Hen answered for me, before I could sign the words.

I gestured to the tray with a food stain on my head, to show her that Hen was telling her the truth.

“Why are you looking for me anyways.” I signed to Mama T.

“Alpha Navier had been looking for you, he said something about you bringing him dinner.”

My eyes widened in shock. “Shit! I'm fucked.”

I just remembered that he had specifically told me, or rather angrily ordered me to bring him his dinner, after training.

No wonder Ellen had lied that she hadn't seen me today, she was probably scared of Navier too.

“You need to attend to him now. He sounded pissed when he went up to his room.” She said, taking the tray from me.

I waved goodbye to Hen and ran straight to the kitchen to get his food and then to the Alpha's quarters upstairs, with my heart pounding in my chest.

“Why are you just coming?” Navier asked as soon as I stepped into his living room.

“I told you I wanted you to make dinner and you're just coming now!” He growled in anger, “you couldn't wait until tomorrow to get acquainted with my men, you slut.”

His words struck me hard, and I held my hand to my chest to ease the pain that twisted my heart. He had called me the word "slut" for the twentieth time that day.

My heart couldn't take the pain anymore. Him hurling insults at me just because I’m mute and have a stealer wolf was cruel and wicked of him. He doesn't trust me to be loyal to him because some stealer wolves don't have a good reputation.

It was as though the mere sight of me repulsed him.

I placed the plate I had packed on the table, to be able to gesture that I was sorry I forgot to bring his meal.

Before I could sign an apology, he grabbed the plate and dumped the entire meal onto my head before walking out, leaving me alone in his living room.

At this point, I was tired of everything—tired of proving myself to others, tired of breathing, tired of living.

What was the point of life if this was what I had to endure every day?

I lost all control and burst into bitter tears, as I acknowledged the painful truth in what everyone had been saying to me, that I was unwanted.

I cleaned up my tears, and walked back to my room, where I was free to cry without fear of anyone walking in on me and making me feel worse than I already did.