Chapter 4
Lucianna’s POV
The night of the Mapping Ball has come! I had few hours left to prepare and I spent most of the day inside my appointed room. There’s nothing to do outside, anyway. My body is asking for some sweat and work out but I’m not sure if I can use the training centers at the pack right now, nor where it is located.
Well, it is prohibited to cross those red borders so it's not like I can go anywhere. But damn, I wanted to lose some steam.
I tried calling Ashira but she’s not picking up her phone. I already talked to Mommy Len so I’m embarrassed to contact her again. My contact sums up to them, I guess.
Rummaging my small suitcase, I took the dress I will wear to the Ball later, flattening it to the bed. The guesthouse room contains essential tools like clothing iron and such so I started fixing my crumpled dress.
I bought this at a thrift store back at my pack and it still looked good as new, as well as the pumps.
Being an orphan and a pack fighter, it's hard to earn money. Most of what I have are from prizes I won to the She-Wolf Fighters Game.
Riiiiing!
I grabbed my phone and placed it between my ear and shoulder as I continue ironing my dress.
“Luce speaking!” I said in a cheery voice.
“How’s the second strongest pack?” said a familiar male voice on the other line. My eyes grew wide from realizing who my caller is.
“Dylan?!” I screamed!
“Hush, Luce. That hurt my ears!” he complained!
I screamed and turned off the iron, making sure it was far from my dress. I can’t risk ruining the only clothing I have for the ball!
I laid on my bed with a wide smile. “Why are you calling just now?! I haven’t heard from you since the Game!”
Dylan is a Beta of the Trivian pack, the third strongest pack of the North. I met him last two months ago when I joined the fighter game and he becomes my friend there.
“I am calling now.” he chuckled.
“You got my number two months ago, you idiot!”
Dylan laughed on the other line. “I’m sorry, I got busy. How are you doing?”
“I’m at Shadow pack right now!” I said with enthusiasm.
He paused for a second. “Why are you there?”
“For the Mapping Ball, duh. The same event will take place at Trivian, too, you know.”
He chuckled lowly. “Of course, I know. That is what made me busy. I was just shocked.”
I frowned at how disappointed he sounded. “Why?”
“I thought you will be my mate. I prayed for it, you know.” he laughed even though I can sense the awkwardness in it.
“Aw, Dylan…”
I’ve joined the fighter's game since I was sixteen. And I have been talking with Dylan when I come over his pack but only two months ago, he joked that he likes me. Or did I just thought it was a joke?
“You didn’t take me seriously, huh,” he stated.
“No! I mean, yes, I thought you were just kidding.” I pouted. My heart was pounding loud and that’s because I’m nervous. I never thought someone will romantically like me, I never experience this and it feels crazy!
“Just as I thought. Well, I’ll hang up now. Give me a call if you didn’t found your mate.”
“Hey!” I called but he turned off the call.
Sighing, I stare at the ceiling. I think Dylan is insane to like me, he will meet his mate. Whatever he was feeling will fade eventually.
I can’t even think of cheating with my mate even though I haven’t met him. Dylan is a nice guy, he was kind and too concern with me during my stay at their pack. But still, I’m after my fated one, not just affection or infatuation without a strong bond.
“Okay, Lucianna! Time to prepare for tonight!” I should shrug these thoughts and focus on my big day!
I stare at myself in the mirror. Hair = Check! Eyeshadow = Check! Blush and Contour = Check! Plump lips = Check! Dress and Pumps = Check!
I decided to put my hair up in a perfectly messy bun with loose strands on the side of my face. I don’t want my mate to have a hard time claiming me when my hair is all over the place, so I made sure he got easy access to my neck. On my eyes, a light smoky black eyeshadow and winged eyeliner made my dolly eyes a bit squinted. I colored my cheeks with a light rosy shade, not too much to scare anyone. My lips are normally full and bow-shaped and I used a light pinkish nude lipstick to avoid a battle between my eyeshadow and lip color.
I’m wearing a red, strapless tube long gown with sequins on the lower fabric. It is also backless, and I don’t care if I freeze in cold tonight, I wanted my mate to be seduced! The long gown hugged my body well and tight, and my curve is invisible through this dress.
“I think this dress will look even better with a slit…” I talked to myself. I’m 5’6” and my legs are long and round, it's a waste that I can’t flaunt it tonight.
Oh, well! I’m sure my mate will take me off this dress soon so no need for the slit, baby!
“Kyaaa!” I screamed as my face turned red from the thought of completing the mating process!
I’ve learned that after this ball, after my mate put his claim on me, it's normal to get on straight to the business and hit the home run.
Okay, I’m seriously flushing right now.
*Knock*
*Knock*
I went to the door and saw a smiling girl in a uniform when I opened it, she is smiling together with her eyes. I’m not sure if her eyes are open or not, to be honest.
“Good evening, Ma’am. I hope I’m not disturbing your preparation. I’m Maya, one of the guesthouse staff here.” her voice sounded stern, not matching her expression. I have a feeling that this person is not as friendly as she looks.
Still, I smiled. “Hi, good evening. You’re not disturbing me at all, is there something wrong?”
I don’t know why she approaches me since there’s an allotted time to head downstairs and get together before riding a vehicle to the Hall where the ball will be held.
“There is a change of time and we are asked to tell the guest to come to the lobby as soon as possible. Three van has left with the previous batch, only one van left awaits downstairs. I’m so sorry for this inconvenience.”
So the Ball will be held early and not on the schedule? And one van left-Holy f--Oh my god! I can’t be late! This is a huge problem if I’ll be left out!
“Sure! I-I’ll just grab my things and head down.”
“Okay, Ma’am. I’m sorry for the trouble.”
“No, it's okay. Thank you, Maya!”
I immediately took my pouch and put the make-up I will use for retouch later inside it.
Why did they change the time? This is so sudden! It is a good thing I’m too excited and prepared myself early! I think there’s still an hour before the scheduled meet-up at the lobby.
“Oh! My invitation!” Oh my! I almost forgot my invitation! I won’t be able to attend the Ball if I don’t have an invitation with me!
Oh, no. Oh, no! I’m panicking!
I almost run to the elevator and my feet kept tapping on the tiled floor because of how slow the human box to escalate! Why am I on the last floor! Argh!
Oh, fuck! I’ll fucking run!
I went to the stairs and inhaled deeply, filling my lungs with oxygen that I know will leave my body later.
Oh, my thrift heels!
I took off my pumps and almost hugged them. I don’t want to judge the durability of this poor little thing but it's better to be safe than sorry.
With inhuman speed, I started running down the staircase of the emergency exit, slamming on every floor’s door, and boom! I reached the ground floor, huffing.
“Oh, there is one more here, bud!” said a guy in a uniform to the same guy who oriented us yesterday.
The serious-mysterious guy looked at me and arched an eyebrow when his eyes landed on the heels on my arms. I smiled sheepishly and started wearing the three-inch precious black pumps.
“H-Hi!” I said, trying to walk closer to the guy while putting on my heels. Struggling.
“You can sit down first and put it on,” he said, pointing to a chair nearby.
“I think I’m late. I don’t want to be a-”
“We will wait. Please take a seat first.”
“Oh, okay.”
I slumped on the soft couch in the lobby and wore my heels, making sure to lock the straps.
I muttered under my breath when I realized how unladylike I sat and the position I have now. I forgot to be prim and proper! Ugh! It’s hard when what I’m used to are man-clothes and boots!
I immediately sat up straight, smiling at the guy who frowns at me.
“Come along.” he started to walk so I walk-run to keep up with him. The guy holds a piece of paper and he scanned it before asking me, “From which pack?” he looked at me with a poker face.
“Regal,” I said with a grin.
He cleared his throat. “That’s weird. The other girls from your pack told me there’s just three of them. Your name, please?”
My jaw dropped from what he said. Those bitches!
“L-Lucianna Withefield.”
How can those bitches gang up against me? I didn’t do anything bad for them to act like that! Fucking bitches!
“May I see your invitation? I need to confirm that you belong to the Ball,” he said as we stop beside the vehicle that will take the last batch of women to the Hall.
“S-Sure.” I handed him what he asked.
And now I’m under investigation because of those selfish, bully bitches!
Okay, calm down, Lucianna. This is your night. You will meet your mate tonight! Forget Leslie and her group and just hope that their mates are dead or away so they had to come back for the next year's Ball!
As for me, I never entertain in my head that I won’t meet my mate tonight. I will meet him! Claim it to have it, right?
“Okay. Here is your invitation. Hop in, the Ball is about to start by now.”
I paled and hurriedly went inside the vehicle. I felt some chills as burning eyes from irritated girls stab me in the back. They must be mad that I’m the last one who made it in.
Looking back at them, I gave them a wide smile though my lips were trembling from how awkward it is. They all looked away and I shrugged as the vehicle started to drive us to our faith.
“I think I’m gonna pass out!” says one of the girls inside the van.
“I know, girl!” another said with excitement then all of them started a whole conversation full of giggling and squealing.
I wanted to join, too!
But since they kept pretending I’m invisible, I couldn’t. I’m too familiar with this ambiance, the feeling someone has when they are being left out. I’m not that dumb to try and blend with them when I can sense the cold stare and treatment from these girls.
Sighing, I decided to focus on the Ball tonight.
As I remember from pack lessons about the Mapping Ball, the she-wolves will fall in line at the entrance of the venue. And one by one, the girls will move to the middle where the males can see them.
The one fated to them will move forward, having their wolf at dominance, uttering the one simple word but enough to make my knee turned to jelly just by thinking about it.
‘Mine’ That is what the male will say before biting on the females’ neck, putting his claim on.
I can’t wait for my turn! Just thinking about it makes me so dreamy that butterflies on my stomach are causing a stampede inside my system!
Male wolves sense their mate through scent and other senses while female wolves will only know theirs once the eyes met.
It's so magical! I will definitely look for mine in advance while being lined up there!
“Okay, girls. The Ball has started, follow the line.” the mysterious guy said when we reached the Hall.
Shadow pack’s Hall is much bigger than ours. And that’s understandable because the population here is bigger than the Regal pack. I was too amazed by the Hall and started walking slowly.
One girl bumped my shoulder and I almost stumbled but gained my balance back and looked at her.
“You’re in the way,” she said, not even complaining, and then moved on to walking.
“Gosh! We didn’t have the chance to watch the opening remarks of the Alpha because of that weirdo.” I heard one of the girls said to another.
Huh! It’s not my fault that they changed the fucking time, dumb ass!
I followed the line and my shoulder slumped from realizing one thing.
Great! Just when I’m ready to die from being excited, I’m the fucking the last one in the line!
Chapter 5Lucianna’s POVI watched as the other girls move in the middle of the hall, then one of the guys will move forward, almost like a wild animal, and starts to put their claim to their fated ones neck. The way the men growls the word ‘Mine’ made my knees tremble with excitement. I can’t wait to hear my mate say it!“The Shadow pack’s Alpha is a hottie! It’s too bad we didn’t get to see him!” said a girl who rode the van with me.What now? Are they gonna keep throwing blades at me? So what if the Alpha looks good? It’s not like they still can drool over him when they meet their own mate.Argh. They start to sound pathetic in my ears! It’s almost unbearable that I can’t stop frowning!“Oh, yes! I heard the girls from the front talked about how mighty he is!”“Second strongest Alpha of the North, I wonder how he looks like!”“If it ain’t because of that bitch who came last…”I decided to just hum and focus on what’s happening in front of us. These girls won’t stop blaming me for a
Chapter 6Lucianna’s POVI was trembling, not with fear, not with excitement, but something different. A feeling I never encountered before I met him, a feeling that is there when he looks at me like this.Disgust? No. He is not disgusted but there is a faint side of that emotion mixed with something else. I can’t put a word with it.“Cat got your tongue?” he smirked, crossing his arms in front of his chest and tilted his head a bit. “Go back. I don’t want to see you.” he said in a clenched jaw.“I-Is there something wrong with me?” I managed to ask, my voice is in its lowest. I think my head is clouded with his scent, and I know its the mate bond talking but I tried my best to not get swayed by the pull.Because I feel like jumping on him right now. And if the situation is not like this, I would’ve.The Alpha just kept on staring at me, making me uneasy but I deny to avoid our eye contact. Even though this is the hardest part I ever encounter with someone. Looking straight in the ey
Chapter 7Jacob’s POVFucking Hell!I don’t want her! I don’t want her!Stop rejecting my mate! You can’t! my wolf growled inside me.Fucking shut up! I growled back at him.I know that I will never escape this mate bond, this is my fate. But how can I? How can I fucking accept her if I can see how weak she is?That gray shadow that I’ve been seeing in my own, and what my mate possesses as well. Am I getting played by fate?Lucianna…She is amazing. A beauty beyond compare. Those big dolly eyes, sharp nose and plumped lips of her invites me, pulls me, seduces me. She don’t need any words, I would have grab her and take her the moment her eyes laid on mine.But I can’t.How can I?I am an Alpha of the second strongest pack of the North but my shadow shows a gray color. I am weak.We are not weak. My wolf says. He has been telling me the same words ever since I found out about my shadow eye ability.Tell that to me when you can explain why our shadow were gray. I hissed. My wolf never k
Chapter 8Jacob’s POVWhat the fuck am I doing?Save my Gamma the trouble, my ass!Your Beta got into your head. Ha! Thank him for me. My wolf laughed and I hated how he can see through my subconscious.He might be right but there is no way in hell that I will accept this. How can I stoop this low?“What? I’m not a flirt!” Lucianna burst and my jaw tightened together with my grip on the steering wheel.She is. She is! My head screamed.You sound to be persuading yourself hard there, my wolf laughed again. He sure is enjoying this!I growled at him in my head, but my tension made me snarled loudly and it reached my mate’s ears.Lucianna gasped at the back of the car and I froze. Did I scare her? Fuck!“D-Did you just…” her voice is low, shaky, and I don’t know why but panic is starting to build in my chest.What? Panic?No. No.I cleared my throat to swallow a huge lump I feel like stuck in it. Why would I care if I scared her or whatever? This shows just how weak she really is, right?
Chapter 9Lucianna’s POVThe sun is rising and I’m still in this corner of my room, sitting like a beaten pup, scared and trembling.I don’t know when my tears stopped falling down my cheeks. I didn’t even know that it will even stop, I thought it will go on until I make a river.What did just happen?It has been an hour since the pain stopped. He stopped. Jacob…How can he do this to me?I started sobbing again, hugging myself even tighter and yet it is not enough.My whole body is aching, but it can’t be compared when I’m still being struck by the pain as clips of my mate’s dirty work flashes on my mind.Jacob, my mate, the person I owe my life to even yet meeting him has cheated on me. How can he do that? We just met last night, and not even an hour passed and he gave me this pain…It hurts.Mate! I want mate! My wolf whined inside me.My wolf kept doing that since I can’t remember. While I’m suffering from the pain inflicted by Jacob’s infidelity, my wolf--who seem to not feel the
Chapter 9Lucianna’s POVThe sun is rising and I’m still in this corner of my room, sitting like a beaten pup, scared and trembling.I don’t know when my tears stopped falling down my cheeks. I didn’t even know that it will even stop, I thought it will go on until I make a river.What did just happen?It has been an hour since the pain stopped. He stopped. Jacob…How can he do this to me?I started sobbing again, hugging myself even tighter and yet it is not enough.My whole body is aching, but it can’t be compared when I’m still being struck by the pain as clips of my mate’s dirty work flashes on my mind.Jacob, my mate, the person I owe my life to even yet meeting him has cheated on me. How can he do that? We just met last night, and not even an hour passed and he gave me this pain…It hurts.Mate! I want mate! My wolf whined inside me.My wolf kept doing that since I can’t remember. While I’m suffering from the pain inflicted by Jacob’s infidelity, my wolf--who seem to not feel the
Chapter 11Lucianna’s POV“What do you think you’re doing?” Jacob said in a rough and serious voice. He didn’t move and he stood in front of me proud, not even budging.Am I wrong? Isn’t he attracted and almost giving in to the bond? What if he is not?I watched his face and tried analyzing what is on his mind right now. I can still see the same glint in his eyes despite the darkness at the hallway, but am I right? Is that glint meant desire?“Taking my towel back…” I said in a low, careful voice.Jacob’s jaw clenched and he held his chin up. The way he gulped hard didn’t escaped my eyes. Can I take that as a hint that he is affected?“You got it now. Walk away.” he said. His voice is almost a whisper, raspy, and deep.It sounded rude, and how he said it almost made me back out, run inside my room and lock my doors in shame but I couldn’t.“No.” I whispered again, staring back at his eyes. Jacob is looking down at me with his head high up. It was supposed to make me feel little, and i
Chapter 12Brent’s POVI shook my head as I hear moans of pleasure inside Alpha Jacob’s office.He’s at it again? I groaned.Alpha Jacob is smart, his war strategies are on top. The pack respected every rules he has come up with, and feared his merciless behavior towards wrongdoings. But, since his mate showed up, he started to get out of control and I don’t think he is aware of it.What’s so hard on accepting a mate, anyway? It’s not like he can escape his fate, its not like being matched with Lucianna will even change so why do he kept on denying her?Jacob could not control the bond at all, especially the urges and that was clear from how he fucked those bitches, yet he denies his wolf from wanting to mate. Not some plain sex.Its morning and he hasn’t stopped since last night. How far can he go?Damn his stamina.I sat on the couch outside his office and sighed. I guess I will need to wait here for a while before I can work. The files and my tasks are inside his office, it’s easy
Lucianna’s POV“Why proceed with it, then?” Aiden asked, wincing a bit from the heaviness of his words. I just told them about the Shadow eye and the curse of it because of a mishap that the first born didn’t inherit the gift.“Aiden! You can't tell a mother to get rid of her pup.” Ashira answered, agitated on my behalf. Aiden looked at me with apologizing gaze but the way his jaw clenched tells me his vote is just the same as Roscoe’s.“I actually tried to.” the sigh that came out of my lips was cold as memories came rushing.“Ohmy! Luce!” my friend's eyes were wide from shock, covering her mouth and tears forming on her eyes.My smile has shame lingering on it. This is a new emotion on my part. I always thought that I haven't done anything wrong when I decided to went with Roscoe on that cave. Maybe its because this is the first time I talked about it with a person of a same gender. Plus, Ash is a mother now so she can relate more than I could imagine how horrible what I did. I su
Lucianna’s POVRoscoe came and as soon as he get off his car, we exchanged a look that lasts for almost a minute. There was a lot in our eye language and it’s more like him saying ‘I told you so,’ and mine were ‘We’re in this situation so fucking try and talk with your mate’s body’. I saw his shoulder sagged as he sighed but headed to where Fhoxia was as if he read my mind.I really hope Roscoe can get something, anything, from Fhoxia. He does before, he still felt the bond between him and his mate’s body that the messenger borrowed. So I hoped, keep on hoping, there’s nothing I could do anyway.“He’s been there for how long?” Harley asked behind me.Time has reached a spot on top of my list that I prioritized to forget, so I just shrugged Harley’s question. Now watching Roscoe has made me feel dreaded in the guts so I decided to head inside and sit on the couch. Harley lingered longer by the porch, watching my brother-in-law like a hawk.I don’t know if I feel excited or anxious with
Lucianna’s POV“She’s creepy.” Harley commented as we drank coffee out at the porch. “How long has she been here?”“One week now.” I sighed. “I keep on asking her why she’s here but she won’t talk. Roscoe won’t be here until later this evening but he told me over the phone that Fhoxia didn’t reached out to him either.”“It means this messenger has no message to deliver? So, what, just being nosy?”I scoffed. “Bite me, I don’t know either.”“And Roscoe will be here? Jacob finally permitted his return?”Jacob gave a temporary ban for Roscoe after what happened in the cave. My mate hated the idea that his brother kept on deciding things for him.“Yeah, he only agreed this morning. He didn’t want to, I just convinced him since Roscoe might be the one Fhoxia could talk to or something.”“And that is why?”I sighed and nudged my mug at the messenger’s direction . “That body was borrowed from a dead woman. The dead woman was Roscoe’s mate.” Harley’s jaw dropped and before he could pry more,
A month has passed. A cough coming from our bedroom made me jumped from my deep thoughts. I was having my coffee in the kitchen and Jacob was at our bedroom. Laying down on our bed even when the sun has shone for an hour and a half.Not because he feel lazy to go to the Hall like he used to, but because he has become weak. His eyes had sunken with dark circles under it, there’s hollow in his cheeks, his skin has become dull and dry and no matter how much I put lipbalm in his lips, it keeps on cracking. His body was not as strong as he was. And everyday he get worse.I can barely look at him in this state but the only time I wasn’t by his side were morning like this. I drink my coffee alone then I’d cry my heart out without making a sound and spend the rest of my day beside him again. This is the time I used to outlet my sadness, fear and every other emotion I couldn’t show in front of him.There was still no news about another way. There’s still no another way and I lose the hope on
I was asked to lay down on a stone table. The coldness touched the bare skin of my back and arms, making my eyes shut hard.“No need to be scared,” the enchantress said, standing on my side while rummaging into a box of small bottles. A potion, maybe?Harley and Roscoe are on the other side of the cave, or the enchantress’s home, as she calls it. There’s no way they would hear our conversation.“Will it hurt?” I asked in a low, trembling voice.The enchantress looked straight into my eyes and there was something in the way she look at me. She was saying something, her eyes were saying something. She doubted my resolve in continuing with this procedure, I know that was what she think.“It will sting.” she smiles but arched a brow, as if testing if I will back down.But I closed my eyes and relaxed.“You’re not scared.” she stated, not asked. It was as if a question in her head was answered.I sighed, long and painful. “No.”“I want to know why,” she demanded with a tone that she wouldn
Lucianna’s POVI cut off the portal I shared with Jacob, feeling the severed connection like a heavy weight lifting from my chest—and yet, a gnawing pit settled in my stomach. It was better this way. He didn’t need to know where I was going, especially for what I was about to do. The decision had been far from easy, but once I made up my mind, there was no turning back. I wouldn’t allow myself to back down.“Calm down, gamma,” Roscoe’s chuckle was low, rough, and filled the silence like an unwanted echo. “You look so pale, I’d wonder if your blood left your veins.” His voice trailed off, almost as if he were talking to himself—though in a car full of werewolves, he knew better. I sighed, a breath that didn’t even begin to ease the tension coiled tightly within me.“Cut it out, Roscoe,” I muttered, my voice steady though my mind was racing. I could feel Harley next to me, practically vibrating with barely suppressed irritation. “Just drive.”The sleek growl of the engine hummed beneath
Jacob hadn’t returned home since last night and I haven’t slept a blink. Thinking over and over again about my decision, I cried all night and prayed, continuously apologizing to the unborn child in my womb.“You called for me?”It was Harley. Of course I called for him, I needed someone by my side right now and since Jacob was against this idea, I had to call for someone who wouldn’t turn down my heeding.“Yes.” I wiped my face and stood up. I probably looked like a mess right now but I couldn’t care anymore. “I also called for, uh, Roscoe. Expect his presence in a bit, I’ll just get something from my room.”Harley’s POVEverything was a mess around the pack. I heard Jacob was scolding his staff and throwing things everywhere. Brent told me, of course. He’d been snooping about what was happening with Jake and Luce that may had caused Jacob’s nonstop tantrums over the Hall.Of course I said nothing. I promised Lucianna I wouldn’t tell a soul about Jacob losing his control of his wolf
Jacob’s POVI once again looked at the corpse, it was shredded into pieces. It’s skull was crushed, bones torned apart and cracked. There was blood everywhere, from the ground up to the trees. The body was divided into four pieces and the head was retrieved up the branch of a tree.“Please forgive me, Alpha Jacob.” said Jordan. One of the council, head of trackers that also conduct the investigation. “I failed to distinguish the entity of the corpse, Alpha.” he bowed and the rest of his team bowed as well.There was no question to why they failed. The core of the corpse was gone, making it hard to distinguish it. Without the core--its heart-- a werewolf wouldn’t shift back to human. No one would know if it was a werewolf or a forest wolf.But I knew.The moment I arrived, the air whispered to my ears. The smell of death lingered in my nose. And the howl of a werewolf called my Alpha wolf.The corpse was a shape-shifter like us. Definitely a rogue because there was no distinguished pac
The door open and shut but I did not bother to look who it was. I can smell Harley, anyway. He just got back from the crime scene. I bit my fingernails from the nervousness I feel inside.What did he find out? Is it a shifter? A regular wolf? Damn it!I did not bother looking at Harley when I felt his presence in the living room. Pretending that I was watching the TV, I stopped biting my nails and inhaled slowly.“How’s everything out there?” I asked in a normal voice.Harley exhaled loud. “Just a wolf. Badly torn apart though.” he slumped himself down the couch. “How’s the talk with the brother?”I shrugged. “Just the usual.”“Yeah, like I know the usual, right?” he said sarcastically.I looked at him and squinted my eyes. Why was he so grumpy? “Someone twisted your panties or something?”Harley shook his head and looked away. It looked like he was thinking about something and wanted to say it out loud but also thinking if he should.“Don’t tell me you will act like that all day? Bec