6- Avoiding

Meg

Beth? How could he do that knowing Will was just outside with him? Is the beta okay with the alpha screwing his daughter?

Just how?

My jaw slackens when the alpha looks up at me, nostrils flaring. The rawness I had seen in his eyes while I myself was beneath him, is in his eyes now. He raises slightly up a bit, his hand snaking in between them then he brings it back up, holding her hands together, all the while holding my gaze.

Beth releases a breathy feminine moan.

Helplessly, I gape, eyes wide but unable to move while an acute pain surges throughout my body and pierces my heart. His swiftly drawn breath was accompanied by a snarl on his lips.

Turning his head to the side, he winces. A deep frown across his forehead as he grounds out an animalistic sound for another few seconds and something strange takes place inside me. It clouds my head then I catch my breath, grabbing onto the doorframe when a sensation hits me.

Both Red and I are taken back when I release a shudder. She rears her head, a vertical frown between her eyes.

Why am I- I suck-in a harsh breath, comprehension coming to me then when Beth rakes her long claws across his chest. He likes it, I can tell by the hissing sound he makes followed by a cross between a cry and hastily withdrawn breath and I undergo erotic pleasure. But I do not have the conscious thought as to why.

Then the alpha moves forward and the woman gasps while something inside me aches- I have personal knowledge myself of the feeling he gives. But the pleasure is still there mingling with the pain. Red is whimpering inside me, head bent, paws over her eyes. A furrow sets upon my forehead, but I am unable to turn away, so I just stare- my brain trying to comprehend what my eyes are seeing.

Both my knees buck when my centre core responds to the alpha raw cry.

<Mat-> I hear the growl inside my head but I block it off. Red’s ears perk up and she searches for the voice but I ignore her as well, instead concentrating on what my eyes are witnessing.

My heart races and another wave of pleasure washes over me when he moves again, and I am appalled. Tiny tingles accompany it and my breathing quickens.

He pulls his narrow waist back, not breaking eye contact with me. Why is he watching me while screwing another? Is this a kink for him?

Red is speechless but I can still feel her emotions. One, she wants to throw up. And two, she wants to know why we are still standing here.

He pushes forward again, and Beth’s sound of pleasure burns my eardrums. But another wave of pleasure rocks me.  “Beth, only you can-” He bends to kiss the woman and that’s when I am freed from his hold. 

It stings but here's the truth smack dab in front of me. 

Beth’s gorgeous while I am- what am I? I am not even attractive in the slightest. Lowly and attractive is me. Also knocked up, I added to my list of what I am. 

A darkness enters me. He kisses Beth but the morning after he’d been with me, he chased me out of his bed- regret all over his features. I know deep in my gut that Beth would not have the same fate. She would be welcomed back again and again.

The pain and hurt rocks me internally from the memory of that morning. It dimmed the scandal that was happening inside me and my quickened breaths slowed. It made way for rational thinking. 

I recall his disgust as he sneered the words at me and I feel my insides being ripped out again.

Why had that completely slipped my mind, till now?

The scorn on his face... the hurt inside me. His moans of pleasure now, in front of me with someone else. I feel the momentary urge to run towards them and rip Beth’s face off. But instead, my head drops and tears spill down my cheeks and onto the floor. Another wave of please washes over me and from my peripheral view I see Beth taking the lead now as they switched places.

When had I become so- delusional? Red does not tell me to add this to my list as I know she is feeling the, ‘I told you so’ and I appreciate her for it.

No, this will not be who I am. Omega or not, I deserve respect!

Turning I run out, not stopping till I am home. And I block out every thought of the alpha, from his brow eyes to his muscled body. I blank my mind from what I saw- not that I could ever forget that sight but I pushed it away from my thoughts.

In the week that followed, I did not go to the packhouse, and the alpha did not send for me which is a big deal because I am one of the domestic workers here. But I brushed it off as if it was unimportant. I have spent the past few days chastising myself over my stupidity over the alpha while spending time with Jax daily. 

He takes my mind away from the heavy stuff. And it was as if we were teenagers again, picking up right where we left off. And Red and Blue love each other’s company as well. Jax and I tune them out to leave them in privacy.

There are times when the alpha has been in my thoughts but dull. Almost faded. But when he comes to mind, it’s only as a fleeting reminder of what is in my tummy and nothing more.

One time, at Jax’s house, glancing up at his yellow circle ring bulb, as we both lay on the wooden floor of his entertainment room, exhausted from the video games we had been playing, Jax details to me about his quite recent break-up with his very human girlfriend. He is not teary-eyed, but I can sense the emotion in his tone. 

He's mending a broken heart. And I thought of the alpha then. No, I was not in love, was I? I was something. Stupid probably, but no, definitely not in love with him.