7- Jax Smells ...divine?

Meg

Yesterday, we ate a delicious lunch made by Jax’s mother, who gushed over me saying I used to make her so happy whenever I visited them before they moved. She apologised to me for leaving me alone which made me uncomfortable because I am not used to people saying sorry to me...except when they tell me what a sorry excuse for a werewolf I am.

Red is overwhelmed as well.

My chin wobbled a bit and I did have the thought, ‘not bad enough for you to take me with you- some daughter’ but it was just an evil thought. It’s not like she birthed me or was my blood relation where she was obligated towards me in any type of way.

And besides, she had her own life to live. It’s not like it was her fault my parents are dead. Or as if she should have taken me with her when she was leaving. Or even adopted me into her family when I was a child. Where I remained all alone except for the other omegas who cared for me. But they showed no love. It was just warm meals and taking me to school. No tucking in at nights, no goodnight stories, no hugging me when I was sad, no scolding when I broke the lamp on purpose. Nobody combing my hair or telling me to shower before I go to bed at night.

Just no nothing.

Everything I know, I learnt from the television or figured out myself, by observing others.

“Thank you, Mrs Mc Lean,” I managed to choke out and she held my hand in a motherly grip across the table as we finished eating. Throat burning from my emotional spillage wanting to scream out, I nodded. I seemed to be doing this a lot lately as a response to holding back my tears. Tears. It seems as if I cannot control them lately.

I ended up leaving abruptly because I was an emotional mess. 

The next day, which is today, I attempt to explain my irrational response to her words, but she tuts me off with a slice of chocolate cake instead saying she understands. But she didn’t say it scornfully as if my weird mood was because I was omega, as I was accustomed to being treated my entire life. Then she leaves us to go to the grocery and we sit slouch-style on his sofa, watching a movie about a cancer patient who falls in love with an A.I. robot.

Red and Blue also take it in, though they both claimed to not like it at all.

Sitting side by side on the comfortable sofa, Jax and I talked about his stepfather and his little brother, Thomas, whom his mother left behind. When I asked him how come they didn’t return with them, he shrugged saying simply that it was because of the pack. His mother did not want her son to be exposed to-

He broke off his words but I knew what he didn’t say.

Scarlette Mc Lean, did not want her younger son to be mistreated. Even if he did not have his wolf yet, humans are often treated with contempt. Much like omegas but better. They obviously aren’t the runts of the pack but they would often be treated like the plague even though they would have respectable jobs and such in the human society.

Jax’s stepfather, Alex would be exposed to the same treatment.

It made sense to not want her loved ones to be here in this type of negative environment. I do not know what this love of family and protection felt like but I nod furrowing my eyebrows, thinking about it.

I’ve always been chopped liver, I guess.

We ended the topic and continued with the movie, in silence. Coming close to the end, the girl lies on the hospital bed with death knocking while the robot leans over her. It’s too much and tears well up in my eyes no matter how much I swipe them away. Trying to hide a sniff, Jax catches me by surprise when he grabs me abruptly and throws me to the empty side of the four-seater, like a little rag doll, my head landing against one of the plush cushions. He then leans over me just as quickly, bringing his head slowly down, closer to my own.

Red’s cheeks- no she does not have any but I can feel her emotions. She wants his nearness a bit too much. She’s beyond weird, and her eyes close down when his smell reaches her.

[He smells divine]

“Damn Juliet, you’ve gone soft on me,” he murmurs near my face and tear flow increases and won’t stop- even when I willed them to. It has me rearing back my head more into the cushion seat, in confusion. I have never cried during a soppy movie before in this manner. Just three days ago, there was no milk in the fridge and that had me sobbing too.

But Jax came over and asked why the fridge was so bare and he took me to the small grocery for some items.

Pushing my hands into the new jacket I’m wearing, for a tissue- he's even bought me the jacket I’m wearing. Jax was in the store and he overheard me telling the shop owner that I would make the full payment in the next month and he’d very casually taken his wallet out and asked me how much I needed again, despite my protests.

Then I rushed home to pick up my savings and gotten the jacket. Only I did not take the one I wanted all along. I got the sandstone shade, hoodie jacket, suddenly not wanting the red hooded one I had liked previously and had been saving for, and almost didn’t get it because of the money I used to purchase the pregnancy tests.

What would I do without Jax? He made my miserable life so...colourful. So, breathable. Forget the stuff he bought me, his presence alone made me feel less clustered-

<Nose>

Almost frantically, I dig from one pocket to the other, searching for a tissue. And I didn’t want to use the jacket to wipe my tears and chance staining it.

Seeing my deep frown and frantic behaviour, Jax quickly leaves the room and I rifle through my bag to see what I had in it that could pass as a tissue- nothing! Not even a T-shirt. My bag contains two books, my phone and toothpicks.

<Next time, might I suggest you prep for the waterworks?>

Getting up, I take two hastened footsteps, I intend to head to the bathroom, down the hall on my left when Jax returns with a roll of tissue. I grab the paper towel he tears out and holds out to me, blowing my nose noisily, holding my hand out for another.

His face cringed a bit when I blew noisily.

My vision blurred, causing me to swipe twice before actually grasping the white sheet again and blowing again. Then Jax wipes my tears with his thumbs gently, giving me a sideways smile but the more he wipes the more flows.

After a few minutes of this, he pulls me into his hard chest, his hands coming up to the back of my waist and head loosely, in a friendly embrace. “Juliet, this is easier. Just use my t-shirt,” he sighs, and I did just that. His smell is comforting and soon I am back to my regular self except for the embarrassing part of breaking down in a fit of salt and water over a stupid movie. 

<Romance is not your thing> My wolf is heavy-hearted but she tries to be a jester for my sake. Her dry sarcasm sometimes gets me by. That wasn’t romance- that was heartbreak, I sass back to her. The human dying eventually, in love with a being incapable of that emotion but at least she had his presence to her end. His honesty. His devotion.

<Yeah? Her tone is deflated.

“Crap,” I mumble against his chest when I glance behind Jax to see the movie credits on the screen, indicating the end we had missed.

“Seems I have returned in time, eh, Red?” he speaks to my wolf, and she wags her tail. She likes Jax, more and more every day- probably because he buys me burgers every day since Red told Blue, that Jax’s cold beef sandwich was in love with the garbage bin. 

Blue laughed and admitted that Scarlette, Jax’s mother, told him the same thing. Jax did not understand what we meant, for to him it tastes fine, he replied.

I didn't have the heart to tell the guy to lay low on the mustard.

“Let’s get an ice cream,” he states flatly, picking up my bag and not even waiting for me to go check myself in the mirror. Trusting him about my appearance, I ran behind him just as I had years ago, my long black wavy hair swinging behind me because my clip had somehow gotten gone, during my sobbing session.

One ice cream and a trip to the town later, Jax kisses my cheek when he drops me off and I thank him for cheering me up, my heart swelling from the happiness of my day. In all my years, never have I ever enjoyed myself this much except for when Jax and I were kids.

I wave to him as he drives off, my smile not leaving my face even when he’s no longer in my line of vision.

My joyous mood is interrupted by a sudden cramping in my stomach, and I cover the area with my hands as I run quickly inside, ignoring the others who are all eating dinner as I make my way to the toilet.

A quick shower later, I am in bed bawling my eyes out again but when I think of how I was against Jax’s body- my head against his solid chest, his arms around me, his intoxicating male scent- my tears slow, coming to an eventual stop.