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Epilogue
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After Everything 1
5 YEARS AGO. It took 7 seconds for my world to turn upside down. All the memories, smiles, happiness and love gone with the words ‘there’s nothing we can do’. In one hour, I lost the two people in my life that mean everything to me. I’ve seen the same 4 walls for the past week. My older brother, Damien is sleeping on a chair in the corner of the plain, sterile hospital room with my younger sister Tate on his chest. Meanwhile, I’m bouncing between both mum and dad’s hospital rooms with my older brother Cole. Just waiting. Waiting for changes. Updates. Something to happen. But at this rate, nothing is changing and nothing is happening. Except everything’s changed. It was only a week ago, everything changed. Yet it felt like yesterday but also like it didn’t even happen. I can’t comprehend it, how could it happen. To us. My family. What did we do to deserve this. flashback (one week ago) Since mum and dad were away after being on their annual anniversary trip to London. Damien my ol
After Everything 2
THE YEARS BETWEEN (15-20 years old).Every time, around that day. I get overly anxious. I can’t help it. I try implement what my psychologist taught me, but it gets hard sometimes.Their deaths hit me hard. I mean it hit all my siblings hard. We were still kids, really. We had no idea how to live on our own, well except for Damien who had done so for the past 4 years prior to their passing. I still think about them. I try not too, but it’s hard you know.The smiles can only go so far.Concealer can only cover so many tear stained cheeks.In the years, following their deaths, things only slightly improved for me. Damien was happy, he found someone. Cole left me at high school for a year, when he went to college (I followed him the year later, but still my final year sucked without him). Even Tate started school and was now 9 and the cutest, bubbliest little sister ever.Damien quit the NHL before he even started.Because with no family on either side.We were left with just the four of
After Everything 3
The harsh brightness from my laptop screen slowly comes into my vision when my eyes start to open. Shit. I must have fallen asleep watching Grey’s, again. Every single time. Shit. It’s 3 when I last looked at the clock, before sleep consumed me. What time is it? I can’t be late on my first day of junior year.2 more years, I remind myself. Two more year and your dream will begin.I lean across my bed to grab my phone soaking up the final minutes of warmth before I have to breach the outside world. I take a quick glance at my clock. 5:00AM, why am I up so early. 2 hours of sleep is not enough. It’s getting worse again.Class starts in 5 hours. 4 more hours of sleep, for me. Leaving an hour to get ready, grab my coffee and stroll to my first class. Shit. My phone. Who is ringing me at 5 in the morning?That’s when I see his name. My big brother Damien. Why is he ringing at this early in the morning? What could he possibly want? That’s when I remember it’s Monday. The weekl
After Everything 4
The first thing I feel when I open my eyes is the crisp cool air following through. Fuck, I left my window open last night, If I catch a cold Coach is going to kill me. No literally. He threatened Dillon once when he showed up to practice with a runny nose. It doesn’t help that we play ice hockey. I mean a rink, isn’t really the place you go to get a tan.Ice hockey. I love it. More than anything. My passion. Not NHL level dreams. But still, something I love whole-hearty. It gives me drive. Senior year. I’m here, after everything I finally made it here. Honestly didn’t think I would.Ok, what the fuck is going on outside my door. Miles should be at work so it can’t be him, Dillon I can faintly hear snoring through the wall next to me. So it’s Cole. Austen isn’t here yet, he arrived home yesterday but went to his parents last night so he gets in later today since he doesn’t have classes on Monday, lucky bastard.What is Cole doing out there? Last night was fun and
After Everything 5
I stumble in the door after a long day of classes on Friday, the night of the party. Why did I agree to go? For Josie, that’s right. Also, why did I think it was a good idea to have classes on Friday. I’m greeted with the smallest patter of steps along the floor.That’s when our little pure white husky greets me by sitting at my feet. Begging for my attention. We bought her after Josie lost a bet with Sutton. I don’t even remember what the bet was about but after it we got her. We love and adore on her. She truly is a little ray of sunshine.The fifth member of our squad. Lulu. She is small, adorable and feisty. I guess I’ll take her for a walk before the party as it appears no one else is home.After I call out “Hey honey I’m home?” I’m met with pure silence. Yep ok, no one’s home. Addison is probably out with her boyfriend. Josie is at her textiles lab and Sutton is probably doing something for her dad no doubt.I put my bag down, whip up my 4th and final cup of coffee f
After Everything 6
“Sorry, I didn’t realise someone else was out here. I just wanted to get away from the party and all.” She’s looking flustered and overwhelmed. I want to make sure she is ok, but I don’t know how.“Is this seat taken?” She asks whilst pointing to the chair next to me. I simply shake my head in response.She moves to sit in there. I find myself drawing closer to her. There’s an unfamiliar feeling of warmth and comfortability when she sits down. One I need more of. “Hey I’m Em, your Kingston right you live with Cole and Miles?” She turns asking me.“Yeah sorry, I’m Kingston. Your brother should be inside and I’m sure I saw Miles with some dude in the corner before.” I nod my head toward the door she just came from.“Good for him. And Cole yeah I know where he was.” She states with a huff.We stare out looking over the balcony gazing at the city in front of us. It’s silent but a comfortable silence, one I find peaceful almost.“So what are studying?” She breaks the silence as
After Everything 7
It’s been three days. And I can’t forget. I try my best to distract myself. Studying. Watching Grey’s. Calling Damien. Hanging out with the girls.Everything to avoid him. I haven’t been to Glazes in three days. My favourite coffee spot.I wish it was different, but I don’t know what I would do if I saw him. So avoiding him seems like the best option.I haven’t seen Cole either. After he yelled at me at the party he kept his distance. I don’t know what I would say to him either. I shouldn’t care. But he’s my older brother. I’m 20 it really isn’t any of his business who I kiss. Well no it is. Since he lives with the guy. And the guy is one of his best friends and teammates. I really didn’t think this through, did I. A simple yes. And everything changed, again.I want another kiss. That’s hard to get when you’re avoiding him. My inner voice tells me.And don’t get me started on when I told the girls. Their reactions were let’s say excited.I pulled a Josie. Pulling everyo
After Everything 8
Coach is trying to kill us.After one and a half hours of gruesome training, he still isn’t giving in.Blood, sweat and tears.I’m slightly distracted. Every empty second my mind finds it fills with sensations from that night.I can’t escape it, even though I’m trying. She wants to act like it didn’t happen, I will try do the same. key word try.It won’t leave me. I can’t forget it. Ok, I’m not actively trying to forget it, so maybe that’s the problem.Lying to Cole as well has been eating away at me too.I love him like a brother and it’s hard looking at him, eating breakfast with him, playing video games with him, watching suits in living room whilst he’s there. When he doesn’t even know I made out with his sister on the weekend.And loved every second of it.I wished I kissed her and everything I felt left. But it only intensified ten fold.“JAMES! Pull your head out of your ass! And get back to it!” Coach snaps at me, clearly a witness to my dazed state.Cole looks over
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