003: Suddenly A Divorcee: Sign. Restart.

ALAINA

Sign it?

“Sign the papers, Alaina, and leave my house immediately after!” His harsh voice caught me off guard. “I have to move on. We had a good run.”

“A good run?” I repeated, choking on the bile in my throat. “Is that what it was to you? A good run?! Really?”

How was he so cruel!? Was this really him? The man I married…? I was breaking apart before him, getting smitten to death by the memories of the past few years. The laughter! The tears! But he remained unfazed. “How could you, Logan!?”

Esmeralda continued to snicker, as she clung closer to his side, while my mother-in-law sat on the couch and gawked like my pain was a TV show. Logan sighed, running his fingers through his hair. “Don't make this any more complicated! I do not love you so sign the papers and leave!”

“BUT YOU MARRIED ME!” I screeched from the depth of my throat as I picked up the file and waved it in his face! “You married me!”

“Because I could!”

“What…?”

Logan scoffed, his eyes darkening as he closed in on my personal space. “You thought it was love, Alaina? You…are so naive, aren't you? I married you because I could! You were young, convenient and so desperate to be loved so how could I not?”

“So loving one person with full-heartedness is my fault…?”

Logan shuffled closer and circled me, his eyes glued to mine and desperately, I still held his gaze and waited for his tightly pursed lips to break into a smile and tell me that this was one expensive joke.

“I don't owe you an explanation, Alaina.”

This room had gotten so small, and I was sinking inside of it. Tonight, I was alone again, no different from my past, when I was working in the pack house being ignored and bullied.

I thought I found my love and happiness and everything should be different, but all were my illusion.

“I wish you'd found out in a better way. I love Esmeralda and she's carrying my child. Sign the papers and leave!”

“Where do you want me to go!? I h-have-” I couldn't stop choking on mere words. “I have no one! Y-you're-”

“This is exactly why you disgust me so much! How are you so pathetic and unflattering at the same time!?” Logan barked at me and threw the papers to the floor where I was, eyes glued to the ground as my red, disheveled hair framed my face.

“I'll get her things! Nothing of this child spends one more day in this house! Her ill fortune is enough to run a river dry!” My mother-in-law added as she headed into the house.

I picked up the pen next to the files with quivering hands. I battled nerves and my hands barely functioned. Take a deep breath, Alaina! I should get this over with.

Every drawl of the pen on that paper felt like chewing and swallowing shards of glass. Logan and Esmeralda watched me keenly as I input my signature in the places needed.

“Good!” He immediately snatched the paper from my grip. By that time, my mother-in-law was back in the living room with a few of my bags that she now kicked and tossed in my direction. “Get out of my house, Alaina. You've served your time.”

I spared him one last glance as I gathered what I could of my bags. “You're going to regret this, Logan! I swear, you will!”

***

As I sat in the taxi with my head glued to the side, watching the buildings and other vehicles blur by, tears streamed down my face in torrents and every single derogatory word I'd heard today swarmed my thoughts, endlessly ringing in my head like morning bells.

The weather was as gloomy as I was. Pastel blue skies, and partly cloudy with a chance of tears. I had nowhere to go, and nothing to do, because I'd dedicated my entire life to a man who turned out to be worthless and undeserving at the end of the day.

A man who'd throw me away without a single thought! Esmeralda's face continued to flash in my mind. She had always been his true love, while I was just a stop on the way! Something to pass time with!

I should have seen this coming!

What did I do all those things for?

The only place I could think of going was my best friend's house. I hadn't phoned her, nor had I informed her. All I clung onto was the strand of hope that Lorraine would let me stay for a while before I bounced back to my feet.

If that would ever happen!

“We're here…”

The driver's voice yanked me out of my reverie and my eyes glazed over the surroundings. I paid him and stepped onto the wet pavement, pulling my tattered and damp bags out of the trunk and onto my feet to prevent them from getting wet any further.

My dejected knock rattled on the door, and as if on cue, Lorraine pulled the door open. Her expression morphed into utter shock, and a gasp ripped through her as her eyes fell upon me.

“Come in, come on in!” She quickly ushered me without any questions, helping me carry my bags, irrespective of how wet and dirty they were.

I felt like a piece of dirt in her utterly tidy apartment, and I stepped in, clinging to a corner so as not to spread mold everywhere. I wanted to burst into tears but I found that I couldn't anymore.

My eyes had grown dryer than a desert.

“Allie, take a seat, please. I'll brew you a warm cup of tea, and then we'll talk.” Lorraine ran off to the kitchen immediately.

***

“He did that!” She exclaimed, her eyes widened in awe. “And with that wench!? That sly son of a bitch, how dare he!? Has he no shame?”

We were seated on the sofa, and I had a blanket coating me. Lorraine was nice enough to have given me a new pair of pajamas, and my luggage was sorted at its finest. Not only that, I'd been fed too.

She forced me to, though it was no different than biting into cardboard.

I was feeling eager to talk now, though I cried halfway through. I nodded slowly. “She gave him the one thing I never could, Lorrie. She's…pregnant. I mean, how could he choose that…over me?”

My chest still hurt like hell, and I wanted to punch Logan in the gut at least once, before demons dragged him to hell. Lorraine continued to pat my shoulders softly. “None of this is your fault. You know that, right?”

“I don't…know, Lorrie. I really don't.”

“Why didn't you reach out to me? Why didn't you tell me all this? I'd have helped in any way that I can!”

Truth was, I was ashamed to.

Lorraine and I both worked at the packhouses, but rather than get married, she left to make a living for herself, while I, stupidly, chose to chase love instead. Look how well that worked out for me. “I didn't…know how to…”

Lorraine shuffled closer and wrapped her arms around me again. Her embrace was like balm to my aching parts. “But it's all over now. The ill-treatment, the sadness! It's all over now, okay? This is a new beginning for you, Allie, and you're going to do just great!”

“But that's the problem.” I rubbed my forehead tiredly. “There's…nothing I'm good at. I don't know where to start from or how to go about it.”

“How about you take a break, then think about it?”

I shook my head softly. “I've been taking breaks all my life. I c-can't continue being useless like this!”

“Useless?!” Lorraine chuckled softly. “Really? You? Have you forgotten how much talent you've been blessed with? There's so much you can do!”

“And what would those be?”

“For starters, singing?” Lorraine started to count on her fingers. “You're an amazing cook, you write so well, you dance well, not to mention, educated-”

Oh.

“But none I seem interested in, Lorraine. And I have to make a living.” I groaned, falling ‘dying duck’ style to the other side of the sofa. “I don't know what to do!”

She patted her chin for a while as she stared into space as though she was trying to think of something. Finally, Lorraine revealed her thoughts.

“How about…becoming a steamer?”

“A stripper!?”

“Oh my god. No, Allie. A streamer. Streaming.”

My expression contorted. “What difference does it make, and w-what does that entail?” I didn't want to seem narrow-minded, but I didn't want to do anything that jeopardized my dignity.

“I'll explain it to you.” Lorraine leaned closely. “Do you remember where I work?”

“With the media?”

“Close, but not quite. A streaming agency, and we have a variety of streamers signed under us. It's a big platform, but I'd rather you do something of your own.”

I nodded slowly to indicate I was listening.

“It's basically content creating but..in a more realistic manner because you'll be giving interested viewers permission into your life, to get to know you and your day-to-day life activities. They just watch you do the things you love and reward you for it. It's…nothing indecent, Allie, and I just think it will be the perfect thing for you. You…do have a lot to show the world.”

I had no idea where this was going, but Lorraine sounded convincing.

“Say more.”