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Prologue
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2021-07-15 21:50:47The truth sometimes doesn’t always have to be told. Truths doesn’t always set one free. Sometimes, it imprisoned them. Lock them up in a dark, empty room and the only key are the lies.
Today is October 1st. The first day where the whispers in my ears starts to prattle again. There’s ringing, then murmuring and babbling non-stop.
You’re better off dead.
You should’ve died that day.Everything about you is a lie.LiarTurns out, they’re right! My whole existence is a lie, and I’m slowly, day by day, failing to remember what the truth is. The whole truth.
Standing at the edge of the bridge, I breathe heavily. There are signs of storm coming. One strong blow of the wind and I know I will fall off this bridge. It’s dark tonight, not like any other night. It’s clouded, pitch-black, causing gloom. The busy street seems to have free time, all I hear are the sirens wail from afar, but no cars, nor people pass by. Perfect, isn’t it? I quit. I’ve had enough of everything. And even if I try now, telling truths and setting things right, it’s too late for me. Too late for the person I’ve become.
I’m enjoying the sight up here. Alone, tempest, free. The moment I jump, no one will ever remember me. No Raina Joaquin will jog their memory. That’s the point of living in a lie. So for the last time, I took my breath and I finally jumped off. I felt the rushing cold wind against
my body as I fall. No family to say my farewells, nor friends to leave a suicide note. Anything that I can recall for reasons to live, none. I thought maybe dying isn’t as bad as people think. But before I crash into the water, terror sucked the very breath from my mouth. A feeling of dread suddenly crept up, as though I still want to live. But it’s too late now."Is she dead?""How is this possible?"
"It think she's dead!"
"Shut up, Hue!"
"There's no way this is happening!"
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Abyss in the sea of memories One: KYLE
Sunday afternoon, while enjoying my day off from my two part time jobs. Dad called, asking if I already ate, what did I ate and how am I doing. He's a big worrier. He's always anxious that I might not be taking care of myself. Others might find it annoying because I'm a grown up man now. I'm already 26, yet Dad treats me like I'm still a baby. But it's rare for someone who isn't related to you by blood, cares for you too much. And I'm grateful for that. "Just don't get sick, ok? Tell me right away if you do. I'll call you again, Kyle. Bye!"he said before he hangs up. I unmuted the TV and lay down on my sofa comfortably. I can't blame him for being so overly worried about me. I've been in and out of the hospital for a month now. In random days, I get fever. Sometimes,
Last Updated : 2021-07-16Abyss in the sea of memories Two: RAINA
2 months earlier "Tell me about yourself." Here we go again. Another mendacious storytelling to share with these two interviewers sitting in front of me. They both looked comfortable in their seat, wearing their black badass business attire as if they're the CEO of this company. The other woman doesn't pay attention to me though, she just kept reading and sorting papers on the table. My name is Raina Joaquin26 years oldBorn on January 3, 1994A novelist. My Dad is a professional taekwondo trainor and my Mom is professional Chess player, who competes around the world.And I am loved, and surrounded by so many lovely people. This is my default story. None of these information are real, not even one. Sometimes, I'm Joanna, a Veterinarian that lives in an apartment with my five dogs and three cats, living
Last Updated : 2021-07-16Abyss in the sea of memories Three: KYLE
I look down from the bridge and waited for her to come through the surface. I wait and wait, but she doesn't seem to emerge from the water. The cold wind started to blew amizzle of rain over us. I cross over the edge, planning to jump and save her. There's another way down to the bridge but It'll take much time. "NO!!! KYLE, STOP!" Allen shouted, as he and Hue run towards me. "I HAVE TO SAVE HER!! CALL AN AMBULANCE, HUE!" "I SAID NO, KYLE! THIS IS TOO DANGEROUS! You both could die!" Allen gripped on my arms. "Or survive, Allen! Do you want her to end up like your brother? We have to save her!" He looked at me in the eye and slowly released my arms. I can see that he's frantic, but we don't have any choice. I'm the only one who's capable of doing this. Allen can't swim and Hue is drunk. "Call an ambulance!" I said before I jumped off.
Last Updated : 2021-07-27Abyss in the sea of memories Four: RAINA
I woke up by an indistinct chatter from a distance. Not too far, it’s like we’re just in the same room. I don’t know where I am but it reeks of alcohol in here. It smells like flu, or some kind of an air-borne sickness that you can smell and taste when you breathe it in with your mouth. I hate it. As I slowly open my eyes, I realized right away that I’m in a Hospital. A bit confused, I look around and see three guys standing and staring at me, like I’m some kind of a ghost. Clearly, I don’t know them, but I can see that they’re just around my age. I'm not sure if I heard it right, but they're saying things like being a ghosts or something. I felt very hot, winded and I started feeling dizzy, so I closed my eyes again. I can feel the pulsing of my head. “Call the Doctor! Hurry!” One of them shouted and one of them run off through the door. I tried to remember what happened to me. All I can reca
Last Updated : 2021-07-28Abyss in the sea of memories Five: ALLEN
I was on my way back to the hospital when Kyle called me saying Raina already ran away, and that she's said things like he's going to kill her. I got worried that she might attempt to suicide again. She needs help, I saw it in her. Those familiar sad eyes desperately seeking for someone to save her. It's the same as my brother. That was five years ago when he took his own life. I was there. Watching him do it. And until now, it tortures me. If only I didn't ignore his constant feeling of sadness and despair, maybe he'd still be here. I knew he needed someone. Somebody he could talk to. About his pain. I knew that it could be me, but I'm too afraid to ask. Afraid that I can't be of any help, so I stayed silent and just watch him lose interest in everything. I've seen it all. Until one day, students were all panicky as they gathered in the school yard, looking up to the guy who is standing on the edge of the rooftop. I wa
Last Updated : 2021-07-29Abyss in the sea of memories Six: KYLE
"I'm not going home with you, Dad." I say. I don't want to leave yet, not until I finally talked to Raina. I can't believe Dad come all the way here just because he was worried. A colleague of him saw us on the ambulance rescue last night as they patrol in the area. My phone's dead because it got wet so I didn't know he was calling me. He called Hue and Allen too but they're just too occupied of what's happening too. "I don't wanna be the anti-hero here, Kyle! But you acted so stupid! You could've drowned there for God's sake!!" Dad said furiously. The three of us are just bowing our heads, arms at the back as though we are being scolded in the military. "And I've never been dissappointed in you Allen!" He added. Everyone has high expectations with Allen, he's so easy to trust. Hearing those words, I know he feels terrible, and I notice he bowed his head eve
Last Updated : 2021-08-04Abyss in the sea of memories Seven: RAINA
Before going into my apartment, I went to the rooftop where a lot of used stuffs left by the residents of the building. It's quiet up here, I have no plans on jumping again, I just don't want to feel cornered in my room. I haven't eaten anything in two days, my stomach is hurts really bad. I wonder if I did the right thing ignoring those people who saved me and wanted to help me. I can't tell if people are being genuine anymore, but they seemed desperate to know me. In fact, I'm curious too, about what Allen said earlier. I wonder why did Kyle thinks he is connected to me. After the sun goes down, I finally had the courage to go back to my apartment. But as soon as I got there, a bag full of clothes are outside the door and it's already locked. I knew already that the landlady did this. I realized that I am now officially a complete homeless. I looked at my phone and it's almost dead. I'm
Last Updated : 2021-08-11Abyss in the sea of memories Eight: KYLE
I can't fall asleep. I kept thinking about Raina who's in the guest room. I got her call earlier when I checked Allen's phone, hoping she would call. And in my surprise, she really did. I had a strong feeling that it was her when I answered it. Then when she asked for help, Allen and I rushed to her. But as soon as we got there, we found her so drunk.The most thing that bothers me right now is that her neighbor called her Catherine."Catherine, do you know them?" the lady next door asked Raina."Catherine?" I asked."Hey, Cathy! Are you okay?" she asked Raina again, "Did you drug her?" she accused us."No, we're her friends, I think she's drunk!" Allen said.She smirked, "Drunk? That's ridiculous, I just gave her one can of beer!" she said. Then in that moment, we heard a growling sound all of the sudden. That sound wa
Last Updated : 2021-08-18
Latest chapter
Abyss in the sea of memories Seventeen: GINGER
I'm not trying to be a hero. I know that I wont gain anything by helping them. However, their desperation pushes me to do things even if it's against the rules, like stealing Raina's case file for example. I drove all the way from San Lorenzo Police District just to get those files with the help of my colleague. Not to mention, I've been sleepless for almost three days now and I feel like I might pass out soon. Nonetheless, I like what I'm doing. This is actually my dream: investigating and solving cases, stuffs like that. I've studied criminology for years. Been in a training and all that process, but I ended up being push around by that misogynist asshole, Officer Nate.I left Raina at my dorm to go back to my house. I hope she won't get caught or I'll be in big trouble."Can I see that painting?"I said to Allen.Kyle is still in shock that he locked himself again in Pepper's room. My poor sister can't use her own room anymore. These i
Abyss in the sea of memories Sixteen
Kyle furiously drove back at Ginger's place, parked in front of the gate and stayed in the car for a while. The thought of being the son of a murderer is tormenting the hell out of him. That can't be, is the only thing that goes in his head over and over. He thinks the possibility is high. Ever since, he always feel like everything his dad told about him are half truth. Like something doesn't feel right. Doesn't feel convincing. And this might be it. The fact that his father is a criminal. Ginger suddenly showed up, knocking on the window. It didn't take her seconds to realize Raina is not with him. "Where's Raina?"she instantly asked. He didn't answer — more like he doesn't know what to say. "Darn it, answer me kyle!"she fumed. He looked her, then back on the steering wheel,"She ran away."he answered. "What do you mean?" A boiling fury swelled up inside of him
Abyss in the sea of memories Fifteen: KYLE
I made a mistake. I shouldn't have push her. I was so eager to find that mysterious man because everytime she opens up her story, it makes me so mad. I just thought that she doesn't deserve all she'd gone through until now. Thinking she's been suffering for so long makes me want to end it as soon as possible. I don't want to see her living in fear anymore. But maybe I've been deluding myself from the thought that I could help her. That I could save her.She wants to forget everything in the past while I seek for mine. Allen assumed that some things that reminds her of her past is the trigger, that's why she reacted that way before she passed out. Now, I think even in her sleep, she can't seem to relax, I can see her sweating so much."What are you planning to do now?" Allen asked.My eyes adjusted at Raina.I maybe don't know her deeply but seeing her so many times in my hallucinations grew quite
Abyss in the sea of memories Fourteen: RAINA
I can't seem to fall asleep that night. I've been so anxious lately because of these people. I don't want them to be involved with this dangerous mess I'm in. But even If Irun away, or try to make them stop, they wont. I'm not sure if they're just taking my situation lightly. My anxiety got worst when I saw Ginger's sister. She's so innocent and loved by so many people.I find myself standing in front of her room, I want to come inside and see her face. Maybe that way, I could ease my mind a little. Then suddenly, she opened the door, I was startled. It's so late and I thought she's already sleeping."Come in!"she signed and pulled me inside. Then she showed me her writing tablet: I can feel you standing in front of my door for a while."Did I wake you up?"&nbs
Abyss in the sea of memories Thirteen: ALLEN
I woke up by the sunlight as it hits my face. I sit up and look around, Kyle and Hue is still sleeping. I wonder where Raina is. I remember how anxious she is last night, while waiting for Ginger and Kyle talking outside."Are you okay? You just passed out." I said to her."I'm fine." she answered. "Thank you, Allen, for helping me." she said. My heart started pounding wildly and my ears are burning as I can feel it turning red. I guess it's because I'm overwhelmed with the fact that I was able to help her.But as we wait, I can't help but stare at her without being noticed. I realized that she's crazy beautiful. Her hair is short and I don't think it was cut with style — it looks more like she cut it herself – but it's not bad. In fact, it suits her. Now, I'm thinking about her again, like I'm going insane.Ginger came out of her room, with her pajamas on and a reall
Abyss in the sea of memories Twelve: KYLE
I saw how her eyes widened and her body froze with horror the moment she opened the text message. The fear took hold of her. I asked her why but it seems like the terror sealed her throat, so I just took her phone, and shocked with what I saw."He's here." she said with shuddered breathing. I grabbed her arms and pull her to run until we got home. I locked the door and all of the windows.Raina can't move, as if the fear paralyzed her. I don't know how to calm her down, because anxiety eclipsed my thoughts too. I've decided to call Dad, but he's not answering, so I called Allen.Few rings then he answered,"Hey, what's— ?""Allen, he's here! Raina's killer, he followed us!" I said."What?! How?""I-I-I don't know how but he's after us! We need to get away here!" I said."Alright we're coming!"
Abyss in the sea of memories Eleven: RAINA
I never knew how relieving it feels like after letting go of the loads I've been carrying for so long. But I still beat myself up for trusting and believing in him, I'm afraid that I might regret it. I locked myself up in his room to think more. There are so many paintings on the wall, just like that house by the beach. I wonder if he painted all of them, it's really impressive. It reminds me of my Dad because he used to paint too. He loves to paint different types of fish, mostly Koi fish. It's his favorite because of the Chinese Tale his Mother used to tell him when he was young.I can hear them talking downstairs. I wondered if those people are really reliable, but I do hope they can help me, because this is my first time trusting my judgements in people. I guess I'm done playing hide and seek.I finally went out of the room and go down. They had a dazed look on their faces the moment they saw me."Oh, hi, again."
Abyss in the sea of memories Ten: KYLE
I remembered something.I told to Doctor Prynne, even though what I saw is still a little bit vague. But for the first time in 15 years, a piece of a random memory from my accident finally pop up in my head. I lost conciousness for like two minutes and when I woke up, Allen told me that Raina already left. I wanted to look for her but Allen stopped me. He's had enough and he wants to immediately take me to my Doctor. I'm a little bit annoyed by the fact that I might never going to see Raina again.After a quick consultation with Dr. Prynne, I asked her to keep this to Dad for now. I don't want to tell him yet, that I'm searching for my past again.We walk back to the parking lot and drive back home. Raina is still asleep soundly. From a single-minded, bad-tempered-girl to an innocent one."You're going to let her stay at your place then?" Allen asked. I nodded. "But can you please be a little more nicer t
Abyss in the sea of memories Nine: RAINA
Part of me wants to believe them. I have so many questions that I really want to be answered. And what If they are telling the truth, then is it really me on that painting? I am dead curious about it.All my life, I lived in fear. Nobody knows me and I stayed hidden just to keep living. But now I realized, existing doesn't mean I'm alive. I maybe breathing in and out but, that doesn't mean I'm alive and that I have the same quality of life with others. I am empty. I have no purpose and future. I wasted so many years thinking about how I'm suppose to hide from my killer. I was consumed by the darkness that I fell inlove with the storm and I never realize the beauty of sunrise on sunny days.Right now, I've decided not to run away anymore. I want to believe Kyle and Allen, but that doesn't mean I have to trust them. My gut tells me that they don't really mean any harm to me but why do I always feel a twist in my stomach when I'm starting to
