Handsome, toxic, dark and wild. Colton Dashner could be anything but one thing: loving someone. I didn't know what I was getting myself into when I decided to be a part of his world, I even thought I would be destroyed by him. However there was something beyond that tough, bad boy facade that he wouldn't let anyone see, I could do it. I didn't heed the warnings, I was stubborn and blind. And now... Now I wish I could go back to that first day I met him, never to have done it again. But time can't stand still, nor can my broken heart.
Lihat lebih banyakMy alarm clock alarm goes off, making an annoying noise that causes me to jump up and down in my bed, opening my eyes in the process, but I close them a second later, mentally cursing the creator of alarm clocks. Especially that one that sounded so loud that I imagine all the neighbors hear it.
The horrible Monday had arrived, it was the middle of the semester. There were still months to go and I was praying for that to happen, to be able to escape the suffering that was high school. I reached out my hand, turning off the noisy thing and sat up in bed, rubbing my eyes and giving a little yawn. For some reason I stare at a shoe in the corner of my room, seconds pass and I wonder what I'm doing.
Half an hour after showering and putting on my usual baggy gray clothes, I grab my backpack and get ready to leave my room to go to the kitchen for breakfast. The first thing I see is Dad making toast, but I think he's burned one because I hear him curse.
"Everything okay?"I ask, hiding a smile, as I put my bag on the chair.
My dad watches me, smiling at me.
"There must always be something that burns on me"he says, setting the burnt toast on top of a plate. But I can also see the other plate full of more toast. And those are not burnt. He sets them down in front of me.
"I know" I tease him, sitting down. He gives me a withering look as he turns, picks up a glass of juice and puts it next to the plate of toast.
"And your sister isn't up yet?" he questions as he puts a piece of toast in his mouth.
My twin sister.
"No, but she'll be here in five, four, three, two, one...."
"Good morning, family," Angelique's voice made me smile at my guess, and I already knew her more than well. Dad gave me a strange look.
"You need to go out more," he said in a whisper and then looked at my sister and added: "Good morning, honey, your sister has the toast and the juice is on the counter."
Angelique takes the juice and sits down next to me, I notice that she is wearing a short skirt and a shirt up to her navel, as well as heeled sandals. Her red hair falls down her shoulders in waves. Her face is fully made up.
"Dad, I need you to sign something for me, it's to go to the Janesville Heart Fair this weekend."
The hearts fair was for part of Valentine's Day and they will be celebrating it in Janesville, the neighboring town. Everyone in the high school would be going and those who were not of age had to bring permission from their parents. At least I wouldn't go.
"All right" he agrees. When they come they give them to me.
"I won't go" I said, sure. Dad gave me a confused look, so I drank some of my juice to hide my face from him.
"Your sister's going, why aren't you?"he frowned.
The answer was obvious: they were going in pairs or else with friends and that and me, well, I had no partner and not a single friendship, so I'd better stay home studying or writing more chapters of my book. I adjusted my glasses and smiled at my father.
"I don't feel like going" I excused myself.
"Let her, Dad, it's better. So she won't have to be alone all the time" my sister interjected.
I shrugged, I had put on blue pants that looked like they were two sizes too big for me, a plain shirt and my reddish hair also fell down my shoulders, but unlike my sister's curls, mine was completely straight.
Dad stood thoughtfully, watching the two of us.
I finished my juice.
"Okay" he agreed, standing up, "But you and I" he pointed at me "we're going to do some father-daughter weekend, okay?"he smiled at me.
I smiled back, too, glancing sideways at Angelique, who was tensing up and clenching her jaw. I felt bad at that moment for her, I knew she was mad that Dad and I would be spending the whole weekend together and there are times when I think she gets jealous of me.
"Okay" I agreed, standing up, "I'll see you," I walked over and gave him a kiss on the cheek.
Angelique still stood up and ran to daddy to hug him and kiss his face with kisses.
"See you in the afternoon," I kept telling her. I grabbed my bag and headed out, the morning was sunny. As soon as I set foot on the sidewalk a convertible car pulled out in front of me.
What was missing, I growled between my teeth.
Loren Wesley was in front of me, along with her two other friends sitting in the back seats. Loren gave me a look of contempt as she looked at herself in the rear view mirror. I could hear the front door close, my sister was coming.
Angelique walked past me and into the passenger seat of the car.
"What are you waiting for, four eyes? You don't expect us to give you a ride," Loren mocked.
I didn't even know why my legs weren't responding. Angelique just gave me a quick glance.
"Let's go" she said to Loren. The girl nodded, pulling away and leaving. I rolled my eyes and set out to walk. I liked walking alone.
Or she just did it because she didn't have anyone to do it with.
Half an hour later I had arrived at the huge high school, students were laughing, others were fighting, others were staring at me and muttering things; it was something I was more than used to. I walked with my head down to my locker. I had Spanish first period so I would get my book out.
Since I didn't want to go back to the hallway I took out the books for the next classes as well, closing the locker very carefully so as not to make noise and not to attract attention, I turned to get to the classroom, but before that, my books collided with a boy's back, making them all fall to the floor.
Silly me, I didn't notice.
"Forgive me" I said, but my mouth threatened to unhinge when the boy turned around.
He was tall, his hair was black and tousled, he wore a nose piercing and I noticed he had a rather large tattoo on the side of his neck. His eyes were very black and... empty. I had never seen him around here before.
The guy gave me a quick glance and then passed it to the floor, immediately kneeling down to pick up the books. I was in nervous mode. I couldn't even move. Even though he was wearing a black jacket, I could tell he had more tattoos on his arms.
"Here you go" he said, handing me the books, but my hands wouldn't move, come on, Monique, move. Heeding my voice, I stretched out my hands, taking the books; somehow his eyes were very attractive and it was impossible for me not to get lost in them. Be more careful.
He gave me a quick glance and then brushed past me, leaving in the direction of the classrooms. I shook my head, trying to come back to my senses. The bell rang announcing the entrance to classes, I spun on my feet and hurried to walk to get there on time, the last thing I want is a scolding from the teacher.
But, it seems that my luck is not on my side today, because I bumped into someone again, causing my books to fall to the floor again; but this time it wasn't the tattooed boy from before, but even worse, Loren Wesley.
"Don't you notice?" She sputtered. I lowered my head.
"I'm sorry" I muttered.
She folded her arms.
"Hey, Monique, it's obvious that Angelique is better than you, even though you're twins." She crooned to annoy me. But I wouldn't give her the pleasure. "Watch where you're walking for next time" she stepped over my books and walked away, guffawing.
I didn't understand why people like her existed. I knelt down and picked up my books, there were no more kids outside. When I got to the entrance of the classroom, I knocked twice. Teacher Karmen gave me a questioning look.
"First time you've been late, Monique" she said, raising her voice a little, making everyone in the room look at me.
"I'm sorry" I managed to articulate. The teacher smiled sideways at me.
"Come in, there's an empty seat at the end, your place has already been taken."
I walked into the classroom, looking for the empty spot, my breath hitched as I saw who would be next to me. The same boy full of tattoos. Using all my willpower I approached the place, sitting down.
The teacher started the class, but for the first time I wasn't paying attention, my thoughts were elsewhere. The boy next to me sat with a carefree air and looked irritated, exasperated, as if he didn't want to be here; or just didn't want to be near me.
"So you have a twin, huh?" His voice made me look at him immediately, confused. He looked at me waiting for an answer, I turned to see where Angelique was, sitting a few tables ahead, surprised that she had her eyes on us, but when she saw me she looked away.
I looked at the boy.
"Y-yes" I hesitated.
"... Are you a virgin?" he blurted out just like that. My eyes widened in astonishment and I bet if I was drinking something I would have thrown it out of my mouth. I looked at him in horror.
"E-excuse me ?"I stammered; I could feel my cheeks flushing. The boy let out a laugh that I imagine didn't go unnoticed by the others.
"Ingenue" he muttered.
I frowned in his direction, why would he ask me that? Was he teasing me? But my thoughts were lost the moment I saw that he was still smiling, his smile was cute.
"I'm Monique" I said without thinking.
The boy looked at me for a moment.
"Colton Dashner"
"What made you come here, Colton?" I questioned, although to tell the truth I think it was a bit hasty on my part as the boy became serious for a moment, thoughtful.
"A new beginning" he replied, and then grabbed his things, stood up and hurried out of the classroom, leaving the teacher talking to herself.
I was confused, why was he acting like that, was it so bad what had happened to him? I looked down at my notebook, but a sheet of paper next to mine, Colton's place, caught my eye. It was in a ball; I looked both ways as if to make sure no one was watching me and picked it up. I unwrapped it, looking at what I had drawn.
It was a face, the girl had glasses and long hair, her eyes looked familiar, as did her nose, and her mouth, and the girl herself.
Was it me?
I stopped the car, without leaving, just watching Kyle. He was standing, without expressions on his face, but he didn't see me but Rich, he looked at him with a kind of hate. "Are they your bags?" Asked Rich, a little anxious. I know this because his hands began to rub each other in a desperate way. Also his leg went from top to bottom. "Your father wants you to go." "I suppose so," I answer, because the truth doesn't surprise me. Kyle had never been a good father, maybe I don't remember what happened years ago but I only know that he never fights enough for his family, he gives up the first one, he is so cowardly that I hate him for that and more things. I wish my sister was here, but instead I have to be with this man who is called my father. "It can't be," Rich murmured, still anxious. "You can't leave, v, tell him not to take you away." I looked at Rich, taking his hands to calm down a little. "Easy, you're having a kind of anxiety attack." I will not go anywhere. The corner of hi
"Rich, we should go back inside," I groaned in his ear. We were still in the stands of the training camp, we kissed and talked about things, but it had been a long time, maybe two hours and we had not entered to find out if there were classes or not. At that moment my cell phone started ringing on a call. I snorted and took it out of my bag. It was Kyle. "Who calls you?" He wanted to know, stroking my thighs. "It's Kyle," I replied. "I won't answer." "V, maybe he's worried." "Leave those things aside then." Rich took the cell phone and accepted the call but gave it to me, even though I signaled him not. I rolled my eyes and finally replied: "Hello?" "V, where are you?" I knew what happened to a teacher, I'm worried. "I'm fine, in college." I stressed Rich's hair. It smelled so good, I had become very accustomed to this smell. His eyes, his nose, his mouth. This man had me crazy, I felt that I fell in love more and more with every second that passed. Rich's way of seeing me, as if it w
Rich was at Fynn's house, doing what? Fynn, our teacher was dead and someone had shot him in the head. Rich watched me attentively, as if I was afraid that I would be scared. -How? "I wanted to know." "Well," he laughed a little nervous, "I wanted to do something good for you, I wanted to talk to Fynn and ask him to give you more time and not reprove you but it was useless, Fynn was a very strict teacher." I felt a little relief when he told me that, my mind was already betraying me with bad things, things that I know Rich wouldn't do. I smiled shyly and approached him to hug him, his smell invaded my nostrils. I liked feeling it so much, feeling his perfume, his hands around me. I realized that I was falling in love more and more about Rich, it was something I couldn't stop, it was something very strong and intense. I was scared, very afraid because my bad thoughts tortured me by telling me that Rich will one day get bored of me and leave me. "Thank you for wanting to help me," I mur
When I got home I felt so mired in my thoughts, in my pain and in my hatred that I didn't realize that I knocked on the door. That could have woken up Kyle perfectly, well, if he was asleep. Although I doubt it, considering that I took his car ... I climbed the stairs in a hurry and entered my room. Rich I couldn't believe he did this to me. "Venus, what's up?" "I heard Kyle on the other side." I lay down on the bed and crushed my face with the pillow. My tears came out involuntarily. Why the hell did I let Rich get into my life like that, to my heart? I felt that this link I had with him would be my downfall. "Venus, open the door." "Get out, Kyle!" Leave me alone. ”The last sentence was broken. What I least wanted was the pity of this man who had forgotten how to be my father. I didn't want to be here. I wanted to run away and never come back! I felt a lot of hate towards Lina, I felt a lot of contempt for Rich too. He lied to me, told me he was at home but I go and find him with he
When I entered home Dad was at the doorway with a glass of juice in his hand. "You're late," he told me. "I was doing things." "With Rich," he said, "Venus, you know I don't like you to go with him for a long time." Rich is not what it seems. I closed my eyes for a few seconds and tried to calm down, I didn't want to argue with Kyle today. I had spent a nice day with Rich so I didn't want to take away the feeling of tranquility in my system right now. "Not now, Kyle, I'm tired." "They called me from college, you didn't attend classes." Fynn also told me that you failed his subject. What is happening to you, Venus? When you just came here I was very understandable with you, I tried to understand you because yes, I made mistakes in the past but I was willing to remedy them. However, now seeing that you are going astray I cannot continue to be tolerant of what you do or say. I looked at him super surprised, it was the first time Kyle talked to me like that. His voice was hard. "Excuse me
Rich and I arrived at a kind of mountain. There were no trees here, just grass, a grass that seemed to have no end. I walked, feeling free. I just wanted to run, run while screaming in the rain. That, that was freedom for me. "Do you like it?" Rich asked me, he had a blanket in his hands. In the distance I looked at the lake, the one where we bathed once. Then I remembered that Rich had told me that this was his favorite place and I was flattered because he had brought me. Only me. "It's amazing," I said, "there is no one but us here." "That's right." Rich stretched out his cloth on the grass, helped him a little and then sat down. "Why did you bring me here, Rich?" I started to feel nervous, I looked at Rich, how handsome it was ... I felt a stab if he fell in love with someone else. Then I began to feel a little insecurity and sadness, I didn't want him to stop loving me because he loved me, right? Or that is what has made me understand all this time. "I told you I would bring you o
Upon arriving at the university we got out of the car, Rich took me by the hand, intertwining them. I felt a tingling with that gesture, without even asking for it. He looked safer than before now, looser. And I liked that. I felt that I was somehow helping him. "Will I see you at lunchtime?" "I worry as we walk towards the entrance." -Of course. Hasley appeared in my field of vision, I was half serious, maybe I was still half drunk yesterday. I don't know. The weather threatened to rain. "Hello, Hasley," I greeted her. "V, how are you today?" "He looked at us both." Hi, Rich. "You look unveiled," Rich says in a joke mode. I think it's the first time I see him wanting to start conversations with another person. And it's weird. "Yes, I couldn't sleep well last night for those drinks." Are we going to classes? "Hasley looks at me." -It's fine. Rich, I'll see you after a while, ”I smiled at him. I was going to go like this without more but Rich stopped me and gave me a warm kiss on the l
Rich when I slowly open the window of Venus's room, I sneak in to avoid waking her. He had told her that he would come - I really gave him that - since now more than ever he felt he needed to be very close to her. It was like a need to be there all the time, feeling it close to me. I close the window to prevent the cold blizzard from entering and waking it up. She is lying on the bed, she didn't even put on her pajamas this time. I was going to go to his bed to lie down next to him but a light stopped me. It came from his computer, he had left it on. I approached the table with the intention of turning it off but what was on the screen had caught my attention. What does Venus do seeing a picture of me and ... Leah? I tensed. There were almost three photos of Leah and I from many years ago, when we were dating. I brought a hand to my hair a little indignant. Venus maybe she is jealous of her so she had been acting weird. How do I let her know that she really matters to me? It is true t
"Rich, I'd like to talk to my daughter a little if it doesn't bother you," Kyle said. I rolled my eyes and looked at Rich, I didn't want him to leave. I really felt very good with Rich and somehow deep inside me I missed him a lot if he wasn't there. I was sticking to Rich ... and that wasn't good. "Okay, Mr. Maxwell," Rich looked at me, "I see you tomorrow," he looked at. It was a blink so fast that it was impossible for Kyle to see him. But I did understand. I would see it later. In my room Or so I expected. "Sure," I smiled half. Rich left the kitchen, then I heard the front door close so he was gone. "Well, tell me what you have to tell me," I crossed my arms. Kyle felt something tired. I had dark circles. His hair was disheveled and his beard grew. He didn't seem to care. Neglected That was the word. "Sit down," he said as he sat at the kitchen table. My instinct was not to sit down, but why start fighting right now? So I sat quietly, waiting for what Kyle had to say. God, I felt
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