CHAPTER FOUR

The day was slightly chilly. Tonya leaned backward on the couch, hugging her shawl tight. Thaddeus sat in front of her, hands hidden behind him. He had that idiot grin smeared across his face that made Tonya knew he was up to no good. She was all too familiar with that look on his face. His shirt - clean about an hour ago - was stained with dirt like he had  just crept out of a mud puddle.

"Good heavens!" Tonya howled, "what in the hell happened to you?"

"Look what I found" Thaddeus said, producing what seemed to be a birdie nest before he had laid his hands on it. "I found it outside the porch on the guardrail. See! I'll hatch the eggs and I'm going to raise them."

"Geez! Just look at you. You look so dirty and how do you plan on hatching those tiny eggs or are you a bird now?"

Thaddeus cast his eyes to the ground. He had gone through the rigor of climbing the railing and in his excitement at the thought of having young birds of his own he had not cared much about his own safety. A wave of sadness and frustration washed over him. "But I thought you always wanted a bird." He said.

Tonya's expression loosened up, but the scowl lingered on her face. "What you did is quite dangerous. What if you fell off the guardrail? You know momma warned us against playing on the porch."

Thaddeus looked at her cautiously, with hopes that she was calm. The look in her eyes bore right through him and he could feel the heat of her stare burning off his cute little face. "I'm sorry, Tonya. I'm very sorry..."

She poked him a little on the shoulder and flashed a homely smile. "Just put that out of here, momma will be mad if she sees that with you."

"What if I keep them in my shoes till they hatch Tonya?" He begged with a childish interest.

 "No, no, no. Take them out right now"

Thaddeus trudged off, the nest cupped in his hands. Walking unhurriedly as if she might change her mind.

"Thaddeus!" She called at the top of her voice. "I can't keep them now! and remember to shut the door when you get back in."

Tonya watched him as he crept out noiselessly out the door, his telltale wet and dirty feet printed the floor. She pushed aside her shawl and got up to tidy up the room before their mother returned home. Tonya made a moan of disgust and walked towards the small kitchen to get her chores done for the brief moment Thaddeus was out of the house.

*************************************

Thaddeus slept round the clock. It was a dip of fresh air for Tonya, this was the only moment she got herself to read. She always imagined living in a fancy house with a massive archive of books in her library. If she had the power, her house would be just a huge library. She smiled at herself as the thought crossed her mind once again. It was always difficult, with everyone around, the constant greetings and chatting and so on, the noise from down the street, cars honking and the occasional noises of people fighting or shouting about one thing or the other wouldn't give one space for concentration. She closed her eyes and prayed that someday they move out of this shit-hole.

She pushed off her blanket, got out of the couch, grabbed her notebook and pen then hurried back to the comfort and warmth of her blanket. Plumping down on the couch, she squeezed herself to get a lot more comfortable and thought of something to write. She could write a storybook or a song. She began scribbling in her notebook. She wrote down a couple of ideas and then changed her mind. She was going to write to her father instead:

Dear dad,

I have spent frustrating hours trying to write to you; if only you were here then we could talk about it. But by the time you receive this; I'd either have gotten over it or forgotten about it. 

Momma neither wants to speak about you or permit us to ask about you.

You've not been home in a while and Thaddeus asks about you all day long. Shanice is growing as fast as you can imagine, remember how little she was the last time you were home? 

How are you? I miss you so much and the house is quiet without you. I'm auditioning to be on the school yearly pageant and mum promise to get me a new dress because Gita keeps showing off her beautiful dresses. I hope you come home soon.

I will be dreadfully unhappy if you miss my audition like the last time.

See you soon,

Your beautiful daughter,

Tonya.

Tonya folded the letter and glanced at the clock. Couple of minutes past five in the evening, she had lost track of time trying to compose what she thought was the perfect letter not even knowing when Thaddeus had walked up to her side.

"What are you doing?" His voice pricked her focus. It was thicker. She was jolted back and felt her heart race faster than a jet engine. 

"Nothing, nothing." She mumbled as she snatched the piece of paper off the table and crumpled it with all the power her palm could generate. She tried as much as possible to hide the content of her hand from the curious searching gaze of Thaddeus. She was prepared for his unending barrage of questions. 

"I'm hungry," he said as he walked back to the toilet. "When will momma be back?"

"Don't pee on the floor, keep your eyes where you are." She said to be sure he's not lurking around the corner. She threw the crumpled letter out of the window as far as it could go.  

Elegant pearl of tears glistened down her cheeks and she quickly wiped it with the back of her palm.