you so dumb jokes

Firstly how to get inside the club (This is where Xain comes in) Get his attention #Santo De Luca the biggest player in the whole of America# Get called to his floor Have sex with him Collect 100 grand Save Sophie Chances of success 98% Chances of failure 2% Hey everyone This is my first time writing a novel So please drop a comment On your view of it Love you all

Warning Mature Content 19+ Sherina Alexander Lansonia. Seorang wanita karier pemilik gedung pencakar langit termegah di Britania Raya. Parasnya sangat cantik nan mempesona. Lekuk tubuhnya indah menarik mata untuk terus memandang ke arahnya. Ambisius adalah cara Alexa menghadapi dunia. Hidup di tengah-tengah persaingan bisnis yang bisa saja 'memakannya hidup-hidup' membuat Alexa tak segan untuk mengorbankan segalanya untuk tetap mempertahankan perusaahan yang ia bangun. Tak pernah melakukan kesalahan dalam ambisinya? Tidak! Alexa adalah manusia biasa. Satu kesalahan besar yang pernah diperbuat olehnya adalah membeli rumah mewah tepat di depan kediaman sang mantan kekasih. -Touch You-

##Synopsis: Summer Plath was Jasper Miller’s sugar baby, and he hid her away in one of his mansions. She was not like other sugar babies. Jasper Miller picked her off the streets, and she remembered nothing that had happened in her life before that as she had lost her memory in an accident. She wanted nothing in life other than Jasper Miller. However, Jasper Miller saw her as nothing but a replacement for the woman he truly loved.“Jasper Miller, if I die one day, would you regret everything that you have done?”“Go ahead and die, then!”Summer Plath did not have any memories to call her own. Jasper Miller locked her up in a mansion and treated her like an idiot. She was a replacement, and he kept hurting her. However, one day, the little idiot who used to be completely under his control disappeared. Only then did he realize that it was too late…

“You have a wife?” I exclaimed, throwing the newly ironed suit at him. He picked it up, scowling at me for wrinkling his clothing “You met Christine?” I opened and closed my mouth repeatedly, shocked by his nonchalance. “We made love!” “We fucked, Abigail, and that has nothing to do with Christine. She’s my wife and you’re just a body for my pleasure. Now, if you’d get out of my office.” When Abigail Hayes starts working at a new office, she is instantly attracted to her boss. Fortunately for her, her boss is just as attracted to her. One thing leads to another and they have sex, only for her to find out the next morning that he is married. Will she continue this forbidden relationship? Will she agree to be his mistress?

Kasambahay ang pinasukan niyang trabaho ngunit dahil sa isang pagkakamali, isa na siya ngayong Maybahay. Kilalanin si Estrella Dominguez, ang probinsyanang handang makipagsapalaran sa siyudad para sa paghahanap ng trabaho ngunit dahil sa ka-mangmangan, napasok siya sa malaking gulo na babago sa takbo ng buhay niya. Kailangan niyang pakasalan si Sebastian Martinez, ang boss niya sana pero sa isang iglap, magiging asawa na pala niya. Kasal na sila ngunit hindi mahal ang isa't-isa. Posible kaya itong magbago at mauwi sa pagmamahalan o baka naman sa huli ay deborsyo ang kahinatnan?

Shabina is a woman full of pride. She has a twisted past and hidden identities that no one knows. However, after meeting the neighborhood school president her life took a drastic change. Problems after problems Shabina lost her way and end up making a big mistake that she'll regret her whole life.

After losing her self-respect for three years, Victoria finally let go of the man who never loved her and the family that never accepted her. She had previously sacrificed her true self in the name of love, but now she aims to reclaim it again, not for someone else’s love, but solely for her own. Unexpectedly, the man who had been distant towards Victoria suddenly became passionate with her. Nevertheless, Victoria had already made a firm decision, or so she believed. On the way to her new journey, Victoria faced several challenges that she never expected. Past dug around and hidden truths unravelled along with endless drama and schemes of enemies. Could she put everything together and find her way alone in this journey, or would she get back the love she has waited for three long years? **** “Alessandro...” I called out to him, eager to express the words that were difficult for me to say: I am pregnant! Not a lie anymore but a fucking truth... I want to say it to him. He stopped and looked back. “Now, don’t waste time. Apologise...”  In a split second, I was caught off guard by his words, causing me to respond with something unexpected and completely out of character. “Let’s get a divorce,” I did not even let him finish his words… (Book 1: Completed ch1-ch156) ************ Book 2: Greetings, Mr. Husband (Ongoing, started immediately after Book 1)

Austin Monticillo had all luxury in life. Money, fame, power, perfect family and of course, women he constantly changes depending to his moods. He is a total womanizer. Alam niya iyon, matapos makapag-graduate ay agad niyang pinamahalaan ang kanilang kompanya. But, out of nowhere, ay may isang Georgina Czsharina Abejuela ang maghahabol sa kaniya dahil naanakan daw niya ang pinsan nito. He fucking don't know about it, hindi niya kilala ang sinasabi nitong pinsan, at mas lalong wala sa taste niya ang babae. Dahil sa isang kasunduan, ay inalok ni Austin ang babaeng si Georgina ng pera para matahimik ito, pero hindi 'yon tinanggap nito, she refuses the money. "Trabaho! Iyon ang kailangan ko!" that word makes his heart rolled out of beat. Dahil ang totoo, nagugustuhan niya ang pagiging arisgada, bulyawera at pagiging matapang nito. He even admires her dahil tumayo itong ina sa batang inabandona ng pinsan niya. Naging single-parent ito sa bata, he didn't saw it coming na magkakaroon pala siya ng bagong figure, at 'yon ay ang maging ama sa batang napamahal na rin sa kaniya. Magiging perfect pa rin kaya ang pagiging daddy figure niya kung may isang epal na darating para balikan si Georgina Czsharina? Sino ito? Ito ang businessman model boyfriend nito na muntikan nang maging fiancé ni Czsharina, si Garret. Mayaman din ito, mas gwapo sa kaniya at hindi hamak na may kinabukasan si Czsharina rito. What would he do to claim her as his? May magagawa ba ang gaya niyang Austin Monticillo lang?

I sensed his presence before I ever saw him, my mate... I looked up to meet amber eyes gazing at me confidently. Zane Black, Alpha of the Blue moon pack, was gorgeous, powerful and just what every woman dreamed of… or so he thought. “Hello, mate...” he said with a smirk. I looked at him blankly for a moment before I slowly smirked at him. “I reject you, Mr. Alpha,” I said in a bored tone. His brows furrowed as he stared at me uncomprehendingly. Then slowly realization dawned and his expression changed to disbelief, pain and finally rage.  “You reject me? You think I am not worthy to be your mate? I promise you, the day will come when you will beg for my love. You will regret rejecting me. That day, I will be the one who will have the last laugh,” he vowed. “Let’s see, Alpha. I will just tell you one thing. I, Kayla Xanders, had never ever tasted defeat in my life till day,” I said confidently.  I watched his eyes go wide in shock as he heard my name. Before he could reply, I turned, and walked away from him. Bring it on, Alpha. Let the games begin. __________________ An unexpected rogue attack changed the life of Kayla Xanders. She lost her family as well as half of her pack. At just sixteen, she took over as the Alpha of the Crescent moon pack and vows to avenge the murder of her family. Seven years later, she had become a ruthless Alpha, feared and respected by all. When she meets her mate, Zane, a playboy with an attitude, she rejects him outright. Soon, they start their games against each other. Why did she really reject Zane? And will he ever win her over? 

* "Marry Me! Stranger." I shout for the whole hall to hear and I pull him in for a deep kiss to the loud gasp of my supposed adopted parents at their first daughter's wedding. What is she doing?! Master cannot be kissed by just anybody! He'll have allergic reactions almost killing him! But what is he doing? He's holding her waist and pulling her further and kissing her back! * Samantha Stiles, denied of her marriage to her long time lover and boyfriend by a well planned and executed scheme by her mother and sister who claims to the world she is adopted, but a fact which remains unknown whether it's a lie or truth. Claude Whyte, a mega trillionaire who recently came to New York to attend an acquaintances wedding but a series of events which include a nightstand and a public proposal is making him stay back. For someone who can't kiss or touch just anybody, he seems quite comfortable with that cheeky woman kissing him in the public.