twilight quotes funny

When I have a pen in my hand and paper before me, I think I want to write something to cast every despair in my pathetic life away. I have a figure of a depressed guy whose fate is too much: saving the world. He is not stupid nor even smart, he is not ugly nor even good looking. He is just a nijikon (A person who loves an anime character more than the real one) like me. He once thought to give up on life, but an event changes his life. I'm sure you guys start guessing how the story goes, but too bad, this one is different than the others.

"You are nothing but a Sperm Donor." "But I am your Sperm Donor." After helping deliver dozens of babies into the world, midwife Anna Johnson is longing for her child. Since her luck has always proven itself unuseful in bed, she turns to sperm donation as one last futile attempt to have a child. The donor she chooses from the catalog seems to be the perfect match - cute, college-educated, creamy, topped with a pair of the most mesmerizing brown eyes she's ever seen. Little does Anna know that the man behind the file is entirely unaware of this whole ordeal, as a cause of a drunken dare. When Daniel Williams finds out about this, things are bound to go down. WATTPAD BEINGZANYAROSS

She's a rich girl. He's her housekeeper. Seth Monroe is the dream of every girl in his school. He is smart, he's drop-dead gorgeous, and captain of the Hockey team. They all want a piece of him, but he has eyes only for one girl. The girl that Seth likes is on a whole new level. she's cute, she's got the curves, she's beautiful and every adjective in Seth's dictionary. Why the hell would she pay attention to a dumb jock? Emily Mae is oblivious to Seth's sneaky glances. After all, she thinks she's as attractive as a Cheese Burger and no matter what her friend says, she feels conscious about her weight, but secretly she's had a crush on Seth, and she knows he's way out of her league. He's a handsome, six feet two Giant of hotness. She'd be lucky if he even said hi to her. Until one day Emily gets her chance. Seth's on her doorstep as a replacement for her housekeeper . [Forbidden Romance ] © Copyright 2021 KittyKash92 All Rights Reserved

Tara isn't your everyday beauty shit she wasn't a size 0 runway model, she was curvey thick and flawless nonetheless. It took her years to see that in herself after going through the ups and downs of being tossed through the foster system she had all but lost her faith in herself. This is why she chooses to become an advocate for foster kids like her. When she first launched her UFCP program she had only one private supporter. Now here she was at a huge charity banquet representing her program publicly and the program would now be recognized nationally. It was like a dream come true especially when she runs into the investor who happens to be an old friend from the foster system who was in the same house as her. Giovanni Berlusconi, he had glowed up since she last saw him all those years ago and he apparently felt the same about her. The only problem was he was a mafia king pin and Tara might have known much about the mob, but she sure as hell knew she wanted no parts of it. Especially after two of her colleagues end up dead in a mysterious car crash after questioning Gio's family connections to the recent spike in missing persons cases in the city. Tara had tried to blow him off politely but Gio wasn't having it. Stopping by her office unannounced. Tara was desperate to avoid the mob boss at all cost that is until she accidentally stumbles on to a private family meeting and witnesses him killing someone. Now she has only two choices marry the very man she fears or die.

Hazel doesn’t like boys, in fact, she stays as far away from them as possible. She wears baggy clothes, doesn’t do makeup and tries her best to go unnoticed. Her plan worked… for a while, until she got the baddest boy in her university hot on her tails. Worst of all? He is her roommate. How will she possibly survive ? Cover by : FatimaZahra970 (Wattpad)

"I hate you Jade, and always will" He said to me. I hold back my tears , '' Well the feeling is mutual''. ---------------------------------- Jade and Alex are married now, But only for revenge. Alex wants to make Jade life a living hell. Jade married him to save her mother, she still love his possesive bestfriend. Join Alex and Jade married journey. Who hates each other most. how will they are going to survive with each other . Will their hatred ever going to change into love. Betrays, revenge,laugh, love, shock, surprise. Waiting for you ------------------------------------

"Why did you do this? Answer me!" Josh an easygoing guy who was immune to love because of how his father was being treated by his mother, decided not to fall for any woman. But, fate had its own cruel way of making him find love. "I don't care Josh, no matter what, i'm not like all women. I will still wait for you because i love you." Sabrina couldn't stop crying. Sabrina who fell in love with Josh after a crazy night in her car, meeting him for the first time couldn't stop loving him no matter how much red lights he showed about women. Will she succeed in breaking fully breaking down all the walls, he had already built, because of his past? Josh gritted his teeth in anger. "Why?...." Find out how Josh will have his revenge on the woman who took his life from him. His father. A story about betrayal, and a quest to win your lover's heart.

Charlie is a childish woman with a lot of secrets from the past that she can't tell to her husband, Drake. Drake is a serious type of person who will bear the struggles of being a husband of Charlie and might put him in a very dangerous situation because of the secrets Charlie have. Such as being an ex-assassin and currently a loan shark. With a misunderstanding in the past incident, someone will die, someone will be save and someone will have to pay. The question is.........who will be who?

The road to success isn't an easy one . Especially when you are poor and meet a rich spoiled jerk . The first time we saw each other was when I saved an old lady from being crushed by his car . After saving the old lady his car slashed the rainwater on the hole of the ground was splashed on me , making me a public laughing stock , just his presence gets me to my nerves . I had enough problems , a jerk like him was all I needed to make my life turn upside down . Four years passed . I finished university and graduated with top grades as a lawyer and bodyguard . Just when I thought that I could finally start my plan of becoming successful , our paths crossed again . This time he had become the arrogant devil with a cold face . Fate is being unfair by making me suffer in the hands of this devil once again . The leader of a huge empire died without naming the name of the inheritor to his fortune . In order to protect my family and give them a better future , I had no choice but to comply with his wishes and help him sit on that throne . How could I , a normal girl , help the heir to a multi-billion company sit on the chair of the leader ? Turns out that the devil needs a lawyer to play in his favor . After he had succeeded, after we each got what we were aiming for , we would go our separate ways . I never wanted to be entangled with him . Meeting him was a mistake from the very beginning . When our collaboration came to an end , he was supposed to let me go but instead of gaining my freedom , I got locked up again . Can I ever escape this man ?

Their life was a total opposite, He is a hitman by profession who does whatever he felt like amd sh is a hopeless orphan what happens when two broken people comes together? Jayden moves to a remote town to hide from his crimes, he meets Bella... Accommodating her after her Father's death, getting used to him alone, he has to go back home. The story takes a turn when she finds out he has a twin brother who is after his life, They both want her, she is only his.