tagalog fish jokes

My mother was the most renowned forensic artist, yet she refused to acknowledge me as her daughter. On my eighteenth birthday, I was kidnapped and called her for help. However, my mother replied impatiently, "Today is Angelina's birthday. Just die if you want attention that badly." Later, all the bones in my body were shattered and scattered everywhere. When my mother reconstructed my face from the bones, she lost her mind.

It's my fiancé's grandmother's birthday banquet. My father's adoptive daughter suddenly snatches the gift I've prepared and says loudly, "My adoptive sister is so rude. "She tried to take the gift I prepared for Mrs. Scott Senior and play it off as her own. I'll have my father teach her a lesson when we get home later." The guests start to whisper among themselves and criticize me. In the past, I would've fled. I would never have dared to retaliate. Unfortunately for her, I've been reborn. I swipe the gift from her and throw it onto the floor. "When has my family turned into something for you to brag about? You mentioned having your father teach me a lesson, right? He's just been released from jail after being there for a decade due to theft. Are you going to bring him here?"

Alex, a deadly hitman that wants to leave the world he knows for a new world , those close to him turned against him. Left for dead in a marsh, he’s saved by Orion, a mysterious merman with no past and a defiant spirit. On the run from the Director’s relentless pursuit and obsession, Alex is thrust into a hidden supernatural world filled with danger, power, and secrets he never imagined. As he fights to stay alive, he begins to unlock something even more terrifying—his own emotions. With Orion at his side, Alex must confront his past, embrace his future, and decide if he’s willing to fight for more than just survival. Because in a world where power is everything, learning to feel might be his greatest weapon.

My husband, Xylo Green, fell in love with the locust tree in our yard. At night, he would wrap his arms around it and kiss it. One day, my dad decided to plant vegetables in the yard, so he cut the tree down. The tree died in the morning, and by midnight, our whole family was gone. Suddenly, I was reincarnated to the day when Xylo was passionately chasing after me. He looked at me lovingly and said, “Olivia, can I be yours?” I smiled flatly. I did not want him anymore, but I would definitely take his life!

As I washed my wife's underthings, I discovered semen stains. It had been over two months since I last did it with Winona Sundown. She always looked down on me for not lasting long and being as boring as a dead fish. I silently accepted her criticism and mockery. That was until I saw a stranger messaging Winona with a hotel room number. The hotel just so happened to be my workplace, Pinnacle Hotel. The room number was 8102. I camped by the room, waiting to catch my prey. However, the woman at the door was a young and sensual woman. Unbeknownst to me, I had fallen into Winona's trap long ago...

Nine years ago, Charlotte Green willingly bound herself to a companionship system to save her sister. The system guided her to the side of Eric Lorvis, a man adored by fate and envied by the world. Her role, as dictated, was to pursue him under the guise of being mute. Before long, everyone in their social circle knew of the mute woman who loved Eric with a fervor bordering on madness. At a gathering one evening, he finally relented. "If you make yourself look like Emily, I'll allow you to stay by my side." Without hesitation, Charlotte borrowed money to undergo plastic surgery. She reshaped herself to resemble Emily Spencer—Eric's first love. With painstaking precision, she molded her preferences to match his, learned to cook his favorite dishes, and catered to his every need. Yet to him, she was no more than a housekeeper. He neither hid his disdain nor spared her his indifference. His insults, his cold stares—she bore them all in silence. She didn't care. As long as she fulfilled her task, the day would come when she could finally leave this world behind. However, when Charlotte truly died, the cold and aloof Eric, who had always appeared so composed in front of others, lost his mind...

Charles Jansen's true love returns to the country in my seventh year with him. The first post on her social media after she lands is an intimate photo of them together. She captions it, "I'm glad we've come full circle." Only then do I find out the ring hidden in the living room isn't for me. Charles' proposal isn't for me, either. Suddenly, I feel exhausted.

On our fifth anniversary, my fiance, Caleb Alton, mixed up gifts meant for me and someone else. When he pulled out a set of lingerie, he looked flustered and explained that the store had sent the wrong item. The next day, I saw a video posted on social media by his junior colleague, Mia Lawson. The caption read, “He said that old lady of his is out of shape, but I look the sexiest in this.” In the video, she was wearing the same lingerie and lounging seductively in Caleb’s arms. I glanced at the engagement ring identical to the one Caleb wore and decided to call my boss. “Hello, Mr. Farrington. I’ve made up my mind. I can start at the branch office next week.”

My husband and his employees went on a camping trip, and his assistant posted on social media. [We drew lots for the tents, and guess who ended up with the handsome CEO!] The post showed a selfie she took. Behind her, my husband was taking his shirt off. Someone left a comment. [A man and a woman alone together? Sounds juicy.] The assistant quickly replied with a smirking emoji. [I like a little excitement!] After I liked the post, it was deleted right away. Soon, my husband called me on video. In front of his crying assistant and several employees, he scolded, “Why did you like the post?! It was just a game! Don’t be so close-minded!” As I watched him hold the assistant in arms and comforted her, I quietly hung up. After ten years of loving Caelan Sullivan, I decided then and there to let go.

Laura mengangumi Bagas, salah satu kakak kelasnya yang, menurutnya, sempurna. Laura mulai mengikuti salah satu akun sosial medianya. Ternyata, Bagas juga tertarik padanya. Laura kira, hidupnya akan menyenangkan begitu dia tahu bahwa lelaki pujaannya membalas rasanya. Sayangnya, Laura lupa bahwa takdir selalu suka bercanda pada dunia. Rasa sukanya pada Bagas nyatanya merusak masa depannya dengan amat. Bertemu dengan Gavin, yang juga merupakan salah satu kakak kelas Laura. Dibalik wajah datarnya, nyatanya Gavin menyimpan dendam pada Bagas. Yang membingungkan adalah Bagas sama sekali tidak tahu tentang dendam itu. Dan parahnya, dendam itu terlampiaskan pada Laura. Gavin, dengan kejamnya, meninggalkan Laura dengan segala traumanya dan... anak.