Marriage First, Mate Second
I tell my friends seriously, “How should we begin?”
“Ok, first we’re going to teach you a basic self defense spell,” Hope says, “I like to call it, ‘Karma’. Because once you invoke the spell, whatever the person tries to do to you comes back to them. For example, if the person tries to punch you, their punch will be returned to them, and they will be punched instead. If they try to cut you, they will be cut instead. You get the idea.”
“That’s exactly the type of thing I need to know,” I exclaim in relief, “Let’s do this!”