funny condom sayings

He is loathsome, arrogant and handsome doctor with uncouth mouth. She is a simple sales girl. Being straightforward and brave, she shamelessly pursued him, sending him gifts, meals, flowers and tried to get close to him. She was humiliated when his staff gossiped about her and she retreated. Then he rejected her and told her they could only be friends. She tried her best to avoid him but no matter how much she tried they frequently cross paths. Suddenly one day he told her. "Be my girlfriend!" What a mess!

nakatanggap sya ng balita na ang isa sa malaki nilang kumpanya ay ninanakawan ng hindi malaman kung sino. Kinausap nya ang kanyang magulang na hayaan syang tuklasin kung sino ito. Nagpanggap na simpleng empleyado si Sam bilang sekretarya ni Grace. Si Grace na napakasuplada, masungit at mahirap basahin na tao. kaya malaki ang pagdududa ni Sam na baka si Grace ang nagnakaw ng pera ng kumpanya. Magkasing edad lamang sila pero mataas na ang katungkulan nito.

Ever read a story that made you laugh and cry hard?Jace Roger is the world's biggest flirt and has always succeeded in getting what he wanted with little to no effort at all. He just knew all the right moves and all the right words to say when it came to getting women to do what he wanted. His perfect bachelor world crashes when Ashley comes into his sights. When he is denied and given no reward for his efforts, Jace begins to fear that he has met his match. Determined to get Ashley to at least notice him, he spends every waking moment unleashing every trick in the book to get her to fall for him. In his mission of a lifetime, he begins to discover the very meaning of life and what it means to actually try and put effort in a relationship. Jace's world is turned upside down and he has no idea what to do next. Will he run for the hills in the end or will he begin enjoying her play Hard To Get?

Bexan Ivanov witnesses a surprise terror attack during his 13th birthday and loses his father in the middle of the terror attack. A terrorist attempts to kill Bexan but fails because a heroic girl with a sniper saves him. Later Bexan knew, the heroic girl who saved him is actually an agent who works in a hidden agency, the unheard Onic Agency! Where undercover agents save the world in secret!Bexan felt immensely grateful towards the heroic girl who saved him from the brutal terrorist. After that, he decided to become an agent. Bexan was indebted to Onic so he pledged to give his full service to the said agency. Within 11 years, Bexan trained his ass off to become District 10's Supreme Commander and in order to do that, he has to get a hold of one of the biggest cases in Onic and that is terminating The Camorra Mafia Group.Bexan won't be handling this big time case alone. He will be assigned with a job partner, but wait a minute! Not just any job partner! Bexan becomes partners with a female agent who's a complete sloth. Lilith Divina helps Bexan with his first assignment in terminating the Camorra Mafia group. Bexan finds Lilith uncooperative with a drunken man's soul. Will their first assignment turn into a success? Or will it turn into a complete catastrophe?

Luka was the best Alpha the Brightwater Pack ever had. That is, until he loses his mate and everything comes crashing down. Having lost everything he loved and his one real reason for living, he attempts suicide on a human territory, when Victoria intervenes and ruin his plans. She makes it her duty to help the man that 'couldn't be saved', after he constantly refuses her help. What happens when she uncovers his secrets one by one? Will Victoria give up on him, or will she surprise them both? Who would've thought that she could save him just in the nick of time? Or does she....

Hindi alam ni Lia kung bakit napakamalas niya pagdating sa pag-ibig, twenty-eight years old na sya ngunit NBSB pa rin na maging ang mga taong nakapaligid sa kaniya ay nababahala na rin… Na nagtulak sa kaniya para pumasok sa isang night bar. “Don’t be nervous, Lia, matutuwa ka sa main event ng bar na ito!” Saad ng kaibigan niya habang nakatanaw sa entablado. Bago pa man makakibo si Lia at nagsimula ng maghiyawan ang mga babae sa paligid, isang lalaking naka-mask ang lumabas na tanging brief lamang ang suot. “The bidding will start now!” anunsyo ng MC sa gilid. “29 thousands!” Sigaw ng isang babae na nagpatahimik sa lahat. “29 thousands, going twice, going trice, wala na bang hahabol?” Muling tanong ng MC. Hindi alam ni Lia kung ano ang pumasok sa isip niya para itaas ang kamay, “30 thousand!” Sigaw niya bago pa man i-close ang bidding. “30 Thousand, the bidding is close! You’ll have one night with him!"

Book one of The Moon & Sun Series. Fate is a very funny thing. Sometimes it can bring something amazing into your life, a grand new adventure that will test and challenge you. That will help you grow and learn where you belong in this world. Other times, well... she's just a gigantic witch with a sick sense of humour. I never asked for any of this to happen, to be beat down, hurt and struggle and fight everyday to grow and get better. This was never what I imagined my life would be like. But I'm not one to shy away from a challenge. And I sure as hell won't let a man define me. I make my own path, I will do what needs to be done and if I have to do it on my own, well then so be it.I'll be stronger for it, and there's nothing a man fears more than a strong woman.

Bonnie and Clyde. Friends to lovers. Lovers to strangers. Bonnie Angelou has always been in love with her childhood best friend; Clyde. She did so many unimaginable things just to keep him looking at her. Ayaw na ayaw niya kapag naagaw ng iba ang atensyon ng lalaki mula sa kanya. Kaya naman para siyang super glue kung makadikit dito para mabantayan at huwag maagaw ng iba ang minamahal. Lahat ng kalokohan, sasakyan niya. Lahat ng hiling, pagbibigyan niya. Pero sa huli, mukhang hindi pa rin sapat...

Menikah karena kesepakatan? Itulah yang dijalani Aldric Andrian dan Fathimah. Aldric hanya butuh keturunan, tapi siapa sangka dia malah jatuh dalam pesona Fathimah. Gadis sederhana yang mengikat Aldric dengan kasih sayang. Takdir, begitu Fathimah menyebutnya. Dia tidak menyangka jika laki-laki lumpuh yang menjadi suaminya. Laki-laki kaku dan dingin, yang berubah menjadi manja. Laki-laki penuh rahasia. Romantisme sesaat yang mereka berdua jalani. Nyatanya, telah menghadirkan ikatan kuat di antara mereka. Status Aldric yang tidak di ketahui Fathimah, membuatnya seringkali dalam bahaya. Pernikahan yang akan menyeret Fathimah dalam pusaran permainan tingkat tinggi. Dalam ketidaktahuannya, dia adalah tumbal dalam kesepakatan antar ketua mafia di masa lalu.

Nang malaman ni Jillian na buntis siya, dalawang buwan pagkatapos magkaruon ng aksidenteng pakikipagtalik sa isang estranghero, na akala niya ay si Brent na kanyang boyfriend, yun pala ay ibang lalaki. Nang hanapin niya ang lalaking may kagagawan ng kanyang pagbubuntis, tinanggihan siya nito dahil may hinihintay itong ibang babae. Na stress siya na nagdulot ng pagdurugo during her pregnancy kaya kinailangan siyang dalhin sa ospital. Paggising niya, natagpuan niya ang sarili sa hospital na kasama ang pinakamayamang babae sa mundo na si Madam Lishou. Sa halip na magalit, ininsist ni Madam Lishou ang isang kasal sa pagitan ni Jillian at ng kanyang apo na si Mckenzie. Nalaman kasi nito sa isang source na ang apo nito ang nakabuntis sa kanya. Tumanggi ang lalaki na pakasalan siya, nagalit si Madam Lishou at binantaan ang lalaki na itatakwil kung hindi ito magpapakasal sa kanya. Napilitang pumayag ang lalaki sa kondisyon na civil lamang sila ikakasal. Habang nagkakalapit ang loib nilang mag asawa, biglang nagparamdam ang dalawang tao mula sa kanilang nakaraan, si Tamara na nagnanais na muling mabawi si Mckenzie at si Brent na handa siyang tanggapin ulit sa kabila ng kalagayan niya. Paano ito makakaapekto sa kanilang pagsasama? Sila ba'y paglalayuin ng pagkakataon, o magtatagumpay sila sa harap ng mga pagsubok, na nagpapalakas ng kanilang pagsasama sa paglipas ng panahon?