how to reject someone nicely

Oh man, gently refusing someone will be tough, but still necessary. I adhere to the motto: honestly is the best policy. Take this as an example：‘I’m really very touched that you’d think of me. Unfortunately, I see our relationship in a more friendly light and hope this does not affect our relations.’

Anyway it is better to end on a high note than to make things too much worse Goodbye all and have your say. Once the final word has left our mouth... Somehow, though, it doesn't make a pang in my heart. Let us say goodnight. Everyone needs others who can give back their feelings.

Just as with any delicate scenario, though, turning someone down politely requires empathy, honesty and a healthy dose of tact. You might be tempted to gloss over the problem and expect they would pick up on things themselves.

But it is best to confront them according to what they said. Your words matter so much right now. Initially acknowledge the courage of their feelings. Then quite gently put forward your own : ‘It took great courage for you to tell me how you felt.’

However, don't fail to soften your words a little with a couple of points that are favorable to you both: ‘You taking this step and letting me know is something tremendous. I really appreciate it. I feel I should also be truthful with you now. I think of you as a friend more than anything else.’

But, also, do try to sweeten your words with a dash of optimism : ‘This doesn't mean our friendship isn't enjoyable or that the time we spend together I hold in high regard.’ In the end, it is all about treating their feelings with as much compassion, kindness and fairness as you can summon forth.

Perhaps it is hard, but let me assure you that it is a lot better than leading them on with false hope. After all, as Alfred Lord Tennyson said, ‘'Tis better to have loved and lost than never have loved.” Now let me do for you as your friend.