RYKERReading the letter gutted me. I knew I was wrong for asking Deacon to investigate her, I knew she would be angry. I had to, I had to know what happened, where her nightmares were coming from. Deacon didn't look at me while I read the note, having come to the house to check on me. I got hurt, not angry, but really I understood. If I was a good man I wouldn't try to contact her again. I would allow her to return to school without thinking of me again. How was I going to do that? Could I do that? Part of me wanted to. I wanted her to be a normal college student whose professor had not walked in and took over her life. I wanted her to forget about me, but I was selfish. I wanted to keep her for myself. I wanted her to be mine. I wanted to bury myself in her. In recent days she has become like medication for me. SHe took away my worries, and stress. Her body took away my pain. I am not a good man, I am a selfish one. I looked up at Deacon, my face hot, and my eyes teary. "I know boss,
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