All Chapters of All Grown Up: Chapter 61 - Chapter 70

AudreyAnnabelle hopped up on one of the seats at the counter of the pizza place, drumming her fingers against the red countertop as we waited for our pizzas to be ready. Dino’s was the same as it had ever been. I was surprised to hear that they still didn’t deliver but only offered take-out pizzas. Same as it had ever been. I shook my head. North Carolina had barely changed since I had left it. Yet again, I felt hopelessly adrift, like I had far outpaced this town and everyone in it.I considered Annabelle for a moment. She seemed happy here. Oh, I knew she had talked about getting out and going somewhere else. She wasn’t planning on staying in Aberdeen forever. It was why she had two jobs and was living at home, after all: so that she could save up the money that she needed to get a fresh start somewhere else. All the same, she didn’t seem like she was unhappy. She somehow managed to make things work, even while she was dreaming of getting away.Could I ever be like that? Settle in

AudreyIt wasn’t like I didn’t want to keep in contact with Annabelle while I was gone, or that I didn’t think that she had anything interesting to talk about from here in North Carolina. I just didn’t have time for anything other than dance.That was the way that it had always been, and that was probably the way that it would always be.I sighed just thinking about it, and Annabelle quirked an eyebrow at me. I shook my head. “Just thinking about that musical again,” I lied, and she laughed. I forced myself to grin and turned my thoughts away from Paris.I wanted to go back home, I really did. It was just that the more I thought about it, the more comfortable I felt here, and the more I sort of liked the options that I had. There were certain freedoms that I had here that I would never have in the strict routine that I kept in Paris. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it would be a process to give them up again, and it had me feeling uncomfortable and out of place even thinking

JesseI pushed those thoughts out of my head before they could get too steamy. I wanted tonight to be perfect, and that meant that that sort of thing would have to wait.Not least of which because Annabelle was still there in the house with us. Just then, she came into the kitchen, clearing her throat to get our attention. I nearly sprang a step farther away from Audrey, even though it wasn’t like we had been doing anything. Heck, we’d barely been close enough to touch.Annabelle looked amused but didn’t say anything to tease us. Instead, she just looked at her sister. “Hey, are you headed out for the night?” she asked. “Or are you doing dinner on your own? Clayton and Mom are at the store right now, and he just texted me to ask you if you wanted a grilled burger tonight. The weather’s so nice that it’s time for a backyard barbecue.”Audrey laughed. “I can’t remember the last time I had a burger,” she said.“It’s all steak tartare over there, huh?” Annabelle joked, getting another gig

Audrey“I know that,” Jesse said, and I hated the defensive note that crept into his voice. Because I knew that he knew that. I wasn’t trying to imply that he was an idiot or that he hadn’t thought about the same things that I had. I knew that he knew I was leaving.I took a deep breath. “I just, I haven’t been acting like this thing has an ending,” I told him. “I’ve been acting like I’m here and I’m going to keep being here. I’m acting like this is forever. But it isn’t, and we both know that.”Jesse frowned. “Where is this coming from?” he asked. Then he continued, “Do you want to leave? Because seriously, it’s okay if you do. I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable.”“You didn’t make me feel uncomfortable,” I told him, sharply shaking my head. “The opposite, actually. Jeez, Jesse, you always make me feel the most comfortable that I ever do, in the whole world. I’m more comfortable around you than I am when I’m dancing.” I paused for a second, wondering if that was true. The word

JesseI didn’t know what to expect when Audrey led me up to her studio. Of course, this wasn’t the first time that I had seen her dance since she had come back. Not that I had gotten to see much of her dancing the day that she’d reinjured her ankle when I’d surprised her with lunch, but I had seen enough to know that she was right when she said that she didn’t dance the way that she used to. No, she was a lot more refined now.That wasn’t really the right word for it. Except that in some ways, I supposed it was. Refined like a diamond, sharp and cold. There was something about watching her dance the other day that made it seem like she was just going through the motions.That was something that I had never seen when she was younger. She’d put her heart and soul into dancing. I wondered if it had something to do with the lack of audience. It had to be a pretty big difference, going from dancing on a global stage to being here in Aberdeen, dancing in a dingy studio upstairs from a downt