All Chapters of Agreement with the Italian : Chapter 51 - Chapter 60

My head keeps spinning, the horrible dream I had again, along with the talk with my parents, have made me rethink so many things.Acknowledging for the first time that this situation is winning me over, and accepting that my relationship with Alessandro is wrong, feels overwhelming but at the same time so liberating.It's very difficult for me because I feel like I have to make a crucial decision regarding us that I'm not ready to face. I stopped caring about how I feel a long time ago and started prioritizing his well-being and feelings over my own, to make him or us happy.If we got to a certain point, it was because I allowed it too.Damn, and I love him. I love everything about that man, and sometimes I love his jealousy and possessiveness, but I don't like the way he wants to control every aspect of my life.I am now more aware than ever of everything that is wrong with our relationship and I know that when I get to Florence, nothing will ever be the same again.I can't deny that

After almost an hour sitting on the couch in the living room, I hear the door of my apartment being opened and instantly I realize that it is Eva, because in a matter of seconds she appears down the hallway walking towards me."Doll, I'm sorry for getting here so late, traffic was a bitch," she says approaching where I am. "How are you feeling?"She gives me a touching hug that makes my eyes water and I can't answer."Claudia, what happened to you?" She asks as she notices me with a worried look on his face."Nothing, it's just that... Alessandro and I broke up and I quit my job too, I feel so bad...""Stop," she looks at me puzzled. "I need you to slow down, because I don't understand how come you stop talking to me for almost two days, and now you tell me you quit your job, I mean... Why? How did he react?""It's just that something horrible happened yesterday," I say, reminiscing about how badly I was treated. "I don't even want to remember it.""If you don't want to talk about it,

People say that when a woman is truly in love, she is capable of enduring many things.She is able to forgive your mistakes, to give you new opportunities, to stick around to see if you manage to make a change and to love you unconditionally. But sooner or later after all those accumulated fights, after feeling unjustified guilt, after all those tears, you reach a point where you just can't take it anymore, and you know there is no turning back.You understand that there are situations that you should never have allowed to happen, that no matter how much love you feel towards that person, if he hurts you, you must get away from him.What happened yesterday was my point of no return. I never thought that no matter how upset he was with me, I would allow myself to be degraded like that. I never thought he wouldn't care and turned a blind eye when other people were humiliating me.I would never do that no matter how angry I am, and the proof is in the fact that I defended him to my mom w

I have tried with all my strength and will to wake up with a positive attitude everyday, but when I seem to be making a little progress, his calls come flooding back, and the memory returns.It is that feeling of helplessness at not being able to turn the page in this tortuous book I call life that overwhelms me.It seems an unfeasible task to forget him, and then I wonder how I can ever leave behind the memory of the man who is still fully alive in my mind. The man who marked me, to whom I gave my body, love and soul. And who embedded himself in my heart forever.Because it is that nothing is forgotten, Ale for me is still more present than ever, and that hurts me. The damage he did to me is irreparable, and the suffering I went through is unforgivable. Nevertheless, my sick thoughts tell me that I need him and also to pick up the damn phone that is ringing right now, because I long to hear him.I long to hear his voice, and to be together with the man I thought I could be happy with

I can't move from where I am, and I am in a state of shock where I know that if I take even one step, I will collapse.I close my eyes, wishing this is a bad dream and it's not happening. He can't be here, he's not out there."It's not real, it's not true," I think, but all these wishes go up in smoke when I hear the doorbell ringing, along with loud knocks on the front door."Claudia, come out and talk to me, please!," I hear his strong voice say.I repeatedly deny, unable to assimilate what is happening, and without further ado I start running up the stairs, heading for my mom's room.When I get to her door I don't just knock, and open it, leaving me to see her sitting on the bed with dozens of papers scattered around that seem to be letters, which she picks up and immediately puts away in a small box she has nearby."Darling, did something happen?" she questions with a strange tone getting up from where she was quickly.But I can't take my eyes off the box back there, I've never se