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All Chapters of Losing the Lonely: Chapter 11 - Chapter 20

36 Chapters

Dinner at Lara's

Over the past few weeks, things at work were ok. Nothing good. Nothing bad. Working is fun but definitely not highlighted in my life. It’s just a skill that I can do and not a big deal. Orion and I have been getting to know each other too. We would go out on dates, talk on the phone, text each other, or even relax at his place or mine. In my twenties, I would have done the deed with him already. Now, turning 40 in 2 years, I abstain. Not that I don’t want to be with Orion, it’s just that the older I get sex isn’t that great. I’ve fallen asleep one time, another time I got bored because it’s the same thing over and over again, and then there was one I called out a name that was a character of a book I was reading at that time. I had to laugh at myself for that one, definitely no forgetting that experience. That’s quite funny now that I look back. Majority of the time, I had to get myself off after he got off. I swear some guys have no idea. With that thought I had to laugh
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Almost A Lonely Night

Waking up with Lara in my arms was an amazing feeling. She’s curled close to my right side with her right knee resting on my lower abdomen. Not wanting to disturb her, I take myself back to last night. Last night was very unexpected. I didn’t expect to meet her two sons and their friends. I’m not against meeting new people, nor do I get uncomfortable like Lara. Even though I haven’t been with Lara long, I was hoping she and I would progress in the direction of meeting family. I wonder what part Sean has in her life because it looked like there is something more to their friendship. Whatever it may be, I will be in Lara’s life for as long as she allows me to be in it. A thought is teetering on the edges of my mind, but I can’t seem to grasp it. Something about being lonely or alone. Oh, yes, the first night, Lara said she was lonely, or something along that idea. I can understand now that I saw why she may feel lonely. She only gets to see her sons when they have time, but
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Over Night With Dr Cameron

My body didn’t hurt much when I went into work that night, so I was relieved. The good part is that I worked in the ER for tonight. It wasn’t busy, which is suprising since it's a friday night, so I just sat there waiting for rounds to start. “Hey Lara” I heard someone say. I looked up from the game I was playing on my phone cause let’s face it, it’s boring now, and I need something to keep me busy, or I will fall asleep. I see Dr. Cameron walking up to me with a big smile on his face. “Hey Doc” I greeted him. “How you doing? It’s been a while” he asks. “It has been a while. Everything is ok. Nothing to complain about. What about you” I respond. “My shift is ending soon. Let’s go eat after” he says to me. “Sure. Who else is coming” I respond because it’s best if there is more than just us. “Just us” he says. My right eyebrow goes up on my forehead. Are you for real, I thought. “Huh” I say. “Just us. That’s ok, right” he asks. Is it ok, I thought. I don’t want to give him the wron
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Lunch with Johanna

Orion The guys wanted to get in some overtime since we have been slammed during the week. I agreed since the volume is more than normal. When the guys asked if they could do this, I said why not, but not a full day. It's Saturday and we'll close at 2pm. I checked my phone before I started to get ready. There was a bunch of messages asking to go clubbing. I rolled my eyes and thought "it's been a long time since I've been clubbing, there's no need for that now." I deleted those messages because I didn’t care much for the sender. I’m 35 with a career, granted I’m not the riches guy in the world, but I feel like I’m pass the point in my life when staying at home isn’t such a bad idea. As the owner of an auto repair shop, I’d rather just go home to wind down after a long day at work. Or maybe have a beer or two with Crown at a bar or at home. When I got to the bottom of the new messages, I notice that Lara texted me. TEXT Lara: Good morning, I hope you had a good night’s sl
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Ignoring Orion

My phone started to ring again. The name on the screen read Orion. I don’t feel like talking to him because of the phone call I received earlier. There is nothing for us to talk about. He can do whatever he wants to do. Then, why do I feel this pain in my chest. It’s not like Orion and I committed to each other, but I still have a pain in my heart. Absentmindedly, I rubbed my heart. When did I start to like Orion that I have a pain in my heart after learning who he was with today? There must be a misunderstanding. I listened to his voicemail again. I looked at the time when he called, then I looked at the time of the other phone call. The timing of the two calls were too close together. This feeling sucks. At this age and experience, why do I still feel pain like this, but I am trying hard to be in control. The pain cannot take control of me. Obviously, I have experience in this, I thought to myself chuckling a bit. My hands start to shake because the mix of feeli
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The Beginning of the Misunderstanding

Orion It’s already 11pm. Lara must be at work by now, so I decided to text her. However, what was I going to text her. She hasn’t gotten back to me since this afternoon. I know I shouldn’t be worried, but I am, though I don’t want to suffocate her. My fingers started to text something, but deleted it. They would start again, then, deleted that one too. My thoughts going crazy about what to write, so I tried again and then deleted it. After more thought, I sent her a voice message. Message: Hey Lara, I’m heading to bed. Text or call me when you have time. It doesn’t matter what you say. Ok, goodnight. Then, I sent the message. “So, what happened” Crown asked me. Ahhhh, I sighed loud. This is so frustrating, not hearing from her all day. What am I suppose to do? My head shook back and forth. “I don’t know man. I tried text and calls. She ain't getting back to me” I answered. I’m feeling at a lost. "Am I overthinking it," I said out loud. She might need a break
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Facing the Upset Crown

“Hello” I heard a deep voice say. The voice was familiar, but I couldn’t quite place it. “Hello, Lara” the deep voice said again. “Crown” I asked. He and I don’t talk much, so it takes me a while to recognize his voice. Why is he picking up Orion’s phone, I thought. “Yeah, it’s me” he replied. “Where’s Orion? Is everything ok,” I asked felling a little concerned. “He’s here. He drank to much last night and is sleeping in” Crown notified me. “What? Why? What happened,” I asked. Why would Orion drink to much that he had to sleep in? “The only thing that I know is he couldn’t get in contact with you all yesterday, so he drank. A lot,” Crown said accusatory. “I…” I started to say but then what. When I heard that he was with Hana for lunch I…. Well, I don’t know. Was I hurt? Was I mad? Did I care? Did I not care? “Lara, if you are just playing with him, then it’s best that you leave him alone,” Crown said. It was a bit cruel for Crown to jump to conclusions that I am playing with Orio
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This Is My Fault, This Time

Lara He isn’t doing anything, just standing there. Looking at me. Two water bottles in his hands. My breathing was becoming heavier. I see his eyes roaming all over my body. My legs start to move like they had a mind of their own because it wasn’t me controlling them. Orion lifts his arms in front of him, holding the 2 water bottles towards me with them touching. Then he slowly opens his arms. As if he can wield magic. My legs obeyed him and did exactly what the 2 water bottles were doing. My hands fisted the sheets I was laying on. What is happening to me? I lost all control of my body. He is not even touching me for goodness sakes. Lara get a hold of yourself. This is not your first time. Woman up! Orion still hasn’t come into the room but yet I can feel his hands all over me. “You will stay just like that until I say otherwise” he said in a very low volume. I whined a bit. “No” I said. “No? Then leave and don’t come back” he said. It looked like he was abo
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Accidents happen, right?

Lara It was another night shift, same as any other night. I was doing my rounds when I noticed Dr. Cameron coming out of one of the patients room. Not thinking much of it, I walked over and said, "Hey." As I took a closer look, he looked really bad. Disheveled, a shadow on his face, and dark circles under his eyes. He looked up at me, but I don't think he really saw me at first. "Dr. Cameron, is everything ok." I asked. "Oh, yes. I was just, um, visiting a friend," he replied, a little distractedly. Wow, I thought. He looks really, really bad. "Did something happen," I asked, concern in my voice. "Ah, a friend got into an accident. She hasn't woken up yet," he said. "Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry about that, " I said, understanding now why he looks like this, as I looked him up and down. "Well, I'll leave you to your friend. Don't forget to eat," I said, then walked away. Holy crap, when did that happen. Im curious now, and I need a little gossip. who shall I ask? Hehehe, as soon
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Not My Girlfriend

Lara Dr. Cameron comes strolling up to me as if he had no care in the world. He still looks a bit tired and exhausted, but I gotta say he is a good looking man. However, he just doesn't have that thing that Orion has. Oh, now now self don't start comparing them. Orion is the Alpha that you've been looking for. Dr. Cameron is just a friend or co-worker. "Hey doc," I said when we came closer. "Hey, is your shift over," he asked. "Yes," I said and nodded at the same time. "Good. Get some rest," he said and was starting to turn around and walk away. "I will. Is there a reason why you called me," I asked, kind of curious. "Oh yeah. My friend is in the hospital," he said in a reserved manner. "Yes, you mentioned that when I spoke to you upstairs," I replied. "She's not my girlfriend. We are just friends. Our families are close and we knew each other for a long time," he said. "Oh, okay," I said. Why is he telling me these things? "I just wanted to let you know," he said. "Ok. I'm gonn
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