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The sounds of the shower water running wake me out of my sleep. Ever since Theo got his own room and I haven't had to share with him, I've slept so much better. Unfortunately, my 'mom' instincts have also kicked up a notch, which includes my ability to hear what's going on just about anywhere in the house.I guess I should get up and start the day before the kids come racing in here.Quickly brushing my teeth and adjusting my ponytail that made a mess of itself overnight, I head down the hall to the staircase, the smell of coffee guiding me. You have to appreciate a man that gets up early and makes sure coffee is brewing before waking you up.As I pass the hall bathroom, I pause, putting my hand on the door. I can hear the shower running and I know it's because Santos is bathing. I want, more than anything, to join him.Sex has come up in several of our therapy sessions over the last year. It's in integral part of any relationship, but I've been too scared to let myself go. Scared of u

"Mari?" I race into the room and drop down beside her. "Mari, are you okay? Are you hurt?" I look over her frantically, trying to see if she's injured."I can't believe this is happening again," she whispers."What? What's happening again?" She refuses to make eye contact with me, which causes me to panic even more."After everything we went through," she cries. "After everything we've tried to rebuild, it's happening again. I'm so stupid!" she yells and throw my shirt at me.I'm so confused. "What are you talking about? What happened?""This happened!" She grabs the shirt back out of my hands and shows me the bottom of it. It's crusty and stiff. I feel my face heat up."Um, yeah." I rub the back of my neck, embarrassed that this conversation is about to take place. "That's not what it looks like."Her eyes narrow as she glares. "I was married to you for a long time, Santos. I know what your fucking semen looks like." She shoots up off the floor and begins pacing. "Did you go to anoth

I take a bite of my own food as I contemplate my answer. "I'm not asking because I'm in an emotional, girly, please-let-him-give-me-the-right-answer kind of mood. Since we're having this weird conversation anyway, I'm just genuinely curious."He takes his time, swallowing, putting down his utensils, wiping his mouth with his napkin. Finally, he leans forward, elbows on the table. "The last time I had sex was the last night we were together. At the conference."My eyebrows shoot up. "Redesigning Your Marriage conference?"He nods. "But that's before we were even divorced.""I know.""That was almost two years ago.""I know that, too."That's not the answer I expected. I thought he would have at least had a fling or two after the divorced was finalized."That doesn't mean I've been a saint, Mari." I see guilt in his eyes. It makes me sad for him, to see him disappointed in himself. I say nothing, just take small bites of my food as I wait for him to continue."It was only one time. But…

"You guys look happy," Justin says as he closes the door behind us. He's been our therapist for a couple of years, so he can read our moods pretty well.Santos sniggers. "We are very, very happy."My face heats up as I take my normal seat on the couch. "Really?" Justin plops down on his overstuffed chair. He's not a normal, stuffy therapist. He's relaxed, which normally makes me relaxed. Not today, however. Today, the topic of sex is going to come up and that makes me nervous. "Sounds like something good happened."Santos takes my hand in his and looks at me, a loving smile on his face. "Yeah. Something good happened."And there it is. My face is flaming since we're having this conversation in front of Justin. He's our therapist and I shouldn't be embarrassed for him to know that we've rekindled our sex life. But somehow it feels more intimate than when we were married. Maybe because the act itself is what caused the demise of our marriage in the first place. So to get back to this pl

I've been staring at the ceiling for I don't know how long. All I know is that I haven't been this comfortable in, probably ever.I'm in bed on my back, one arm behind my head, and a very naked Mari snuggled up on me, head nuzzled into that place between my shoulder and neck, her arm over my chest, our legs intertwined. It's the post-coital position I never thought I'd experience again. Yet here I am, drawing circles on her lower back as she drifts in and out of consciousness.Me, though, I'm wide awake. Sated, but awake. And I can't stop thinking about what Mari said earlier about being content.People always talk about chasing their happiness, but what if that's the root of most relationship problems? What if that's been part of my problem? What if there is so much pressure to be happy, when happiness isn't something you can be every minute of every day anyway? What if being content, with lots of sprinkles of happiness, as Mari describes it, is actually a healthier, more realistic go