Home / Romance / Lovers In Disguise / Chapter 111 - Chapter 120

All Chapters of Lovers In Disguise: Chapter 111 - Chapter 120

203 Chapters

chapter 109

"Be that as it may, I couldn't just burn the notepad. It was as if those scrawled pages held all that wastrue about my life that no one else knew about. I didn't want Alice to read them so I went to work on aSunday evening to lock them in my desk, but couldn't do anything at all on Monday because theyseemed to be staring at me accusingly. So I called Sheila, feeling insanely stupid about that in itself,and practically begged her to read them. I was so insanely glad when she agreed, I droppedeverything I'd tried to work on before and just walked over to her office to drop the pad off."The days until our next session were endless. Alice constantly got on my nerves, then she wanted toknow what was wrong with me and got pissed when I couldn't tell her, and on top of that she ran intoBella, then threw a fit for days because you'd canceled your wedding. It got to the point where Iactually told her to stop being so ridiculous, which got me banned from the bedroom for the re
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chapter 110

just going through the usual routines without any feelings behind them anymore. I had two sessionswith Sheila that week, and I think for the first time they were actually all about her field of expertise. Ithink she really wanted to tell me to just accept that things wouldn't work out anymore, but I justcouldn't accept it. I was so ready to give up everything just for her."And then we had our last fight. I still don't know what caused it, I mean we were in bed and I wasjust -""I don't really think I need the details about that," I interject.Jazz shrugs, but inclines his head."Sure. Either way, she suddenly shoves me away and runs out of the bedroom, screaming somethinglike, 'I knew that you were just like him!' at me. No idea what she meant, and of course I followedher. Thought I'd find her either crying or screaming in the living room, but she just got herself a bottleof water from the fridge after tying her bathrobe around her, then turned to me and calmly told
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chapter 111

that there's nothing he can say to defend himself. Which is probably the truth. Strangely, that newlygleaned knowledge does nothing whatsoever to ease the rage boiling in my guts, in fact it only leadsto even more frustration.Until suddenly, something else he said makes sense."She knows, doesn't she? Alice knows. That's what she meant with 'You are just like him' – she meantyou're just like me."His loud, somewhat dejected sounding exhale is the only answer I get, but it's not enough for me."Just what the hell did you do to her?""I did nothing!" he shouts back, clearly agitated. "Nothing more than I've done plenty of times with herbefore! Not that you really wanna know, because you still see her as the pure girl seeking love whodoesn't really have an interesting sex life -""Bullshit! I know she fucks round just as much as you, and I've heard my fair share of details! I don'tgive a flying fuck about what she does or what she likes, but I won't stand by while you
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chapter 112

And you really gave me an easy way out when you said that we didn't have to add anything kinky toany future threesomes."And the third one was great again, nothing that made me feel uneasy, we clearly all enjoyed it, andthe little spat you and Bells had afterwards was probably overdue anyway, I told myself."Another pause, and this time I just have to ask again."Really nothing that made you uneasy about it?"His eyes zoom to my face, and for the first time he looks amused when he chuckles."No. Might sound strange, but I've never felt weird about kissing you. Or fucking you. Or being fuckedby you. That part of my sexuality I own, and for whatever reason it's petty much confined to you, ifyou've ever wondered. We've had sex, so what, that doesn't make me gay, nor would that really be anissue for me if it did.""Fair enough."My curt answer makes him snort,but then he sobers up rather fast."Still, I guess that's not the whole truth. Or I don't know, that part is hard
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chapter 113

"Well, that's pretty much it," he finally speaks up again. "You know, now would be a good time for astatement." When I remain silent he sighs, then rubs his face with his hands. "Guess I don't deserveone. Either way, now you know my side of the story. And I hope that when I tell you now that I'msorry about causing so much pain to everyone involved, that it's the truth. I really didn't think, not for amoment, that things could blow so out of proportions. If I could go back in time, I would tell myself toforget that insane idea the moment it came to my mind, and grow a pair and tell you guys that – I don'tknow. I'm not happy with things ending like this. That while I want to be with Alice, I'm not sure thatwill ever work or is everything that I want. And -"He inhales sharply, then looks me right in the eye as he goes on."And that while I will always see Bella as my incestuously attractive childhood friend, somewherealong the way you became just a little more than my
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chapter 114

are or were really feeling for him then, but I knew that it was too soon, that you simply needed moretime to work things through and maybe realize a few things on your own. I knew that I'd have to be theone to steer conversation to that topic, but I'm kind of used to by now that any uncomfortable stuffends up being my responsibility, I can deal with that."Again she halts, and I still don't know what to say. When that becomes obvious, she resumes."In a way I'm even glad he burst in on us today, because quite frankly, I think I would have goneinsane any day now if I got any more frustrated."Bella laughs a bit shakily, but her gaze remains trained on me."Before I get lost in my own not quite coherent thoughts, I think I should state a few facts that I'vecome to accept and know a while ago. First, I love you, and you love me. The kind of unconditionallove that endures a lot, and if for whatever reason our relationship wouldn't work out, it would verylikely leave us b
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chapter 115

"That's not a no.""But also not a yes."We keep looking at each other then, and after a while it all just gets too heavy for me."Do you mind if I just hold you?""Of course not," she whispers, then brushes another kiss over my lips before she turns around, readyto be tugged into my embrace. I mold my body against hers, with her head pillowed on one of myarms, while I snake the other over her abdomen. We stay like that for a while, our fingers entwinedover her stomach, both of us lost in thought.I have no idea how much time has passed – it feels like hours, but has probably only been minutes –when I hear her clear her throat."You know, I really miss what we had. And I'm not even talking about the mind-blowing sex. Justus. Like after that first threesome, when we wereall lying in a heap of limbs on the couch with two boxes of pizza and a movie playing, and life wasjust so uncomplicated. I want that back."Her words make me yearn for just that, but I know that we
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chapter 116

I have to move towards Jazz, and I pointedly glance at her less than subtle hint, which she of courseignores.The silence continues to stretch in all its awkwardness while we're busy caffeinating ourselves. Andit just keeps getting worse by the minute, until finally I've reached a point where I just can't let it dragon anymore.Straightening, I lean back, not quite incidentally snaking my arm around Bella to keep close to her.She smiles a little at that but doesn't comment, nor does she lean into me, either.Turning back to where Jazz is studying us, I try to come up with something worthwhile to say, but asmy mind is still sluggish, I decide to stick with being blunt. So far that has served us all well today."I'm so sick of all this shit." Jazz frowns at my words but holds his tongue, and with a loud exhale Iforce myself to go on. "I'm sick of feeling like a dumb fuck, and I'm sick of everything being sodifficult and awkward. We've all made mistakes, and we'll have
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chapter 117

I half expect her to play coy and bite her lip, or add another remark that will dampen the intensity andturn it into something more comfortable, but she doesn't. Instead she makes him tilt his face up moreby bringing her own close to his, then kisses him, slowly but passionately. He hesitates for a moment,then joins in, his hands kneading her hips just where her tank top has ridden up, revealing a sliver ofwarm, smooth flesh.I also expect some of the residual jealousy that has been riding shotgun throughout our last threesometo rear its ugly head, but watching them just makes me unbearably horny.Bella breaks off the kiss by leaning back enough to grin at Jazz, her fingers idly playing with his hair."Does that feel weird to you?"He shrugs, still focused on her, the motion letting him push up her top a couple of inches more."A little, as usual."Not the reply she's been waiting for, but she laughs it off easily enough."But is that a problem for you?""I'd say tha
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chapter 118

I don't know if I should be offended or amused at the assumption, but decide to let it go."Nope, all her idea.""All?""All," I confirm with a smirk, then continue to ravage Bella's mouth while my fingers keep digginginto her tits. Jazz eventually overcomes his shock and picks up where he has left off before bydragging Bella's pants down her legs. Tease that she is she keeps her knees together so that he doesn'tget a better idea of what said 'all' entails, but once she's naked herself she starts working on the fly ofhis jeans, unhindered by my hands still kneading her breasts.It takes a little shuffling and tugging to get Jazz out of his jeans, and I can tell from the way Bellakeeps fumbling that she wants me to help. I'm more reluctant to let go of her tits than touch him, whichmakes me pause once again, but I'm not one to dwell on things like that for long. We end up kneelingon the couch with Bella perching on the edge of the coffee table, and I can't really brin
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