ANASTASIAI could sense his arrival. I heard the sound of the car all the way from my room. I had just called him a few minutes before I got back home.I don't believe he is suddenly in front of my house; it's as if he abandoned everything he was doing and ran to me.I couldn’t express myself on the phone; I was short of words as tears streaked down my blue eyes. I only said a few words to him and ended the call. “You know what it means by seeing my call again, Denver.”Fuck, I miss calling his name. I miss my lips calling him mine. He has always been mine, but I had been too scared to voice it out.Now, it finally feels like I can call him mine without being scared of his reactions to it. It’s so calming thinking of how this man made me feel—not the bad part but the good ones. It’s so erotic whenever I remember the hot sex we had multiple times.God, I can’t be mad at him anymore. I should really give him a second chance. After all his efforts? I’m convinced he is truly sorry for wha
ANASTASIAThe pain of being constantly ignored and getting less attention from your lover is no different from slitting your wrist.I remained in my car, staring at the entrance of his house and the text messages we had a few hours ago. I love Ben, and I will do anything for our relationship to be better again.We used to be so much in love, but lately it seems like he loathes me. His eyes have gone totally empty whenever he stares at me. Bennett used to stare at me with so much love that I could see it burning in his eyes, but not anymore.I have been wondering what went wrong. What I did wrong.My brain has been hurting because I’ve been trying to think of what could have gone wrong, but nothing. I’ve been trying not to think too much because Karina, my only close friend said I have seizures whenever my brain is overworked, and I wouldn’t want to have any of that, but Bennett's silence has been making me lose it. I had been good to him since I met him.I’ve been loving towards him,
DENVERI use my hand to slam the door once she is out of the house. She’s already seen me naked, and I couldn’t stand to watch her see me getting hard.I shouldn’t get turned on because it was an incident. She came to find Bennett but happened not to see him.I shouldn’t even give it a second thought about what just happened a while ago, but the way she stared at me got me fucking turned on, and I started to imagine things that I was supposed not to ever think of.She is my son’s girlfriend, and that isn’t even much trouble. I am twenty years older than her, which should be the trouble.Why didn’t I know when she arrived? I didn’t know, and that was my fault. Plus, I ought to have stopped walking around the house naked all the time.It’s a bad habit for me. I do this when I’m alone and enjoying my music. It’s a sign of peace of mind when Bennett and his mom are away from home.I charge into the shower to take a bath, but I can’t get rid of her words from my head and the way she kept s
ANASTASIAIf it was so easy to wipe my memories of last night, I will do it again.I got heartbroken by his son and got dumbstruck, frozen, and my thighs shamelessly clenched by him. I can’t stop thinking about his whole expression yesterday and the way he watched me look at his body curves and the huge thing he has in between his legs.I was fucking daring; I knew it. Maybe it was the pain, but strangely, I still do not regret saying those words to him, even though he thinks I’ve gotten mad.Karina is beside me, sitting around a table where we get all sorts of coffee and stuff. She has been talking for over thirty minutes, and I haven’t really heard a single thing she has been saying.I nod, and, uh, so she doesn’t get pissed for letting her talk go to waste. Talking is one of the major things we don’t have in common. I’m reserved and a good listener, but Karina is the opposite of that.I knew she had been talking about Bennett, but I really didn’t get a thing from what she said beca
ANASTASIAEven though I’ve never met my parents, I was sure as hell that I had their genes. And the one I will forever be proud of is picking myself back up after being bruised and broken.I was the type of trash that could easily be recycled. I picked myself back up and headed to the bar for some alcohol.I couldn’t go back home. I didn’t want to be lonely when my heart was dying; I wouldn’t be able to breathe.I needed to stay outside where I could get enough air and probably drink off my sorrows. I recently started liking alcohol since Bennett started acting up.I’ve always thought alcohol was useless, but I recently figured out that it isn’t all that useless. It can stop you from feeling pain and take you to a different realm, and that was just what I needed.I drank until I began to throw up. I thought I wouldn’t be able to get up from the seat, but I was surprised at how I was able to walk and even drive.Speaking of drive, I should never have thought of coming here again. It’s
DENVERI’ve never seen a girl with such boldness. She falls asleep in Bennett’s room, and I stay for a while watching her sleep.She curls up herself in bed and pulls her knees up her chest. Even in her sleep, she looks so adorable, like a doll.She said she isn’t a little girl, but she curls and rolls up like one and has attempted to fall forward a couple of times, but I place a finger on her forehead and push her backwards so she doesn’t hit the ground. It’s light contact, only a damn finger, and yet it feels like my body has caught fire, and the flame doesn’t cease to extend through my entire body.I take a pillow from the other side of the bed and drop it in front of her so she doesn’t roll off to the ground when I’m out of the room.It looks like Bennett isn’t going to come home tonight; that’s why I took her to his room. I would have preferred the visitor room, but it would be too cold for her, especially with the way she is curling up. I can tell how vulnerable she is to the co
ANASTASIAWell, maybe I will agree with everyone at this point: Drinking is a bad thing. It induces this stupid courage in you and leaves you hanging there and staring blankly at the mess you’ve caused once the effect is gone.I’m biting my lips so hard right now because I can’t believe the mess I’ve gotten myself into.My memories of last night with Denver flood back. I press my head into the soft pillow, picturing the image of last night—how he kept staring at me and how his face remained rigid—but he's still the most handsome man I’ve seen at forty, and I can’t help but cringe at the words I said to him.And hell, no fucking way, I told him I haven’t been normal since I saw his cock. I pop my cheek as it burns red hot while I sit on the edge of the bed. How do I approach him now? I’m so embarrassed at myself.I wonder how he sees me or what he thinks of me now. Fuck, I promise that will be the last time I take alcohol again.I bring my hands to touch my lips, and my body explodes i
DENVERNew things.I’ve always been against trying out new things; I prefer to stick to the usual stuff or routine, and getting involved in new things has never been my game. New dishes. New hairstyle. New woman. Nah.This is the first time I’m violating my principles and doing things out of the ordinary. Thinking of my son’s girlfriend is out of the ordinary.But can I stop thinking of her? No.I’ve tried and can’t stop thinking of the softness of her lips, her innocent and gorgeous blue eyes, and, of course, her daring spirit.She says she doesn’t want to do boys anymore, and just the way she said it gave me relief in such a way. At least she knows what she wants, and nobody is compelling her.The problem might not be with her, but with my son. She’s Bennett’s girlfriend. I can’t compete with my son; it’s the wildest thing to think of. What if he finds out? What if I hurt him?Bennett has been my treasure since the day he was brought into this world. I love him because he came from