ANASTASIA
The pain of being constantly ignored and getting less attention from your lover is no different from slitting your wrist.
I remained in my car, staring at the entrance of his house and the text messages we had a few hours ago. I love Ben, and I will do anything for our relationship to be better again.
We used to be so much in love, but lately it seems like he loathes me. His eyes have gone totally empty whenever he stares at me. Bennett used to stare at me with so much love that I could see it burning in his eyes, but not anymore.
I have been wondering what went wrong. What I did wrong.
My brain has been hurting because I’ve been trying to think of what could have gone wrong, but nothing. I’ve been trying not to think too much because Karina, my only close friend said I have seizures whenever my brain is overworked, and I wouldn’t want to have any of that, but Bennett's silence has been making me lose it. I had been good to him since I met him.
I’ve been loving towards him, always trying to be there wherever he needed someone. Whenever he needed to cheer up, I was there with him, and now he looks at me like a complete stranger. Nothing hurts more than watching your favorite person begin to see you as a stranger to them.
Bennett and I had known each other for a while now. He is a 21-year-old young-looking guy who takes completely after his father's hot looks. And I'm twenty, and we've been dating for two years until he starts to act mad.
I’ve finally had the courage to speak to him and ask him what truly went wrong with us. I’m done with the silence between us. I really want to know why he has been staying away from me for over two weeks without any calls or texts from him.
I’ve decided to confront him; that’s why I’m at his house now, but I’m trying to get rid of the tears before I get out of the car.
My eyes burn with pain as I blink back the tears that've been threatening to run down my cheek again. I read our messages again, and the conclusion was that he was at home and we could talk things out.
I pull out of the car, rubbing my wet palms on the sides of my jeans. There’s no need to ring the doorbell. I walk into the sitting room, and it’s deafeningly silent. Well, I’ve known Bennett to be a noisy person; he is either playing trap songs or singing with his horribly good voice.
I’ve been here a couple of times, and I know my way around, especially to his room. I run through the stairs and the alley until I reach his room.
I flare the door open after taking a quick breath and rub my hand calmly on my chest. I walk in, but I’m stunned at the spotless state of his bed and everything.
He’s not here.
Bennett was never this organized whenever he was home. Did he play me for a fool? No, he wouldn't. I don’t want to think of that, as I still roam my eyes around his room.
He vividly told me he was home and I could come over since I asked us to meet. Now my heart is splitting in half at the realization. He lied to me.
He’s nowhere in the room. I moved from his studio room to his bathroom, and there’s no sign of him. I’m short of breath as my heart contracts. I’m hurting as hell because I feel so stupid now. Why would he do this to me? What wrong have I done?
Isn’t this enough of a sign that he’s totally lost interest and I’m the only one who’s been fucking putting in too much effort? It’s my fault; I should have moved on too and quit thinking about him, but easier said.
I turn around to run out of the room as I bawl my eyes out. I run with so much energy down the stairs, and I reach the sitting room in no time.
I’m about to run for the door, get out of this fucking place, and never return here again, as well as erase Ben from my head forever, when I see something. No, not just something a fucking huge thing!
My teary eyes increase in size, and my mouth falls open. I can barely say anything but stare intently at him. Bennett’s father, Denver Harper. He is a forty-year-old man who is the most handsome man at his age.
“Holy Shit." I scream in a whisper.
"When did you get in here, Anastasia? Ben has been gone for hours now.” His eyes grow wide, but not because he is surprised to see me, but because I don’t stop staring at him, knowing that he is naked in front of me.
“Do you walk all naked when there’s no one at home but you?” I almost bit my tongue out. I feel sudden hotness from within, not because I’m heartbroken but because of something else that I can’t make sense of, and my stupid thigh is already clenching.
"Little girl, are you not afraid to take your eyes off? This can ruin you." His dominance wraps around his voice, my eyes trail off his cock, and I view his entire body. The masculinity got my thighs drooling and gave me the fastest shock I had ever felt in my stomach.
It's the first time I've taken note of how perfect his body curves are. His wide chest and broader shoulders. Fucking manly!
My face heats up as if I’m being steamed. “What can ruin me?” I swallow hard, trying to play dumb when I'm fully aware of what he's talking about.
“Exactly what you are staring at can ruin you, little girl.” I’ve almost never paid attention to his voice, but now I am, and for no reason, it’s making my thigh clench harder, and I can feel my pants getting wet as it vibrates through my stomach.
“And what if I want to get ruined by it?” I know I’m making a deadly mistake by responding dirty to him.
He tilts his head and comes closer with the glass in his hand. He towers over me because he is 6'3 tall and I'm average. “Trust me, you wouldn’t want to start this. Now go back home, girl.” He strokes my red hair and nudges at the door.
“Go home and forget you ever saw me this way.” He demands it with his raspy voice. A voice in my head screams at me to run, but I can’t tear my eyes off him as determination dominates my mind.
“And what if I can never forget what I just saw?” I gulped, staring at his green eyes.
“Then you are damned, baby girl.”
DENVERI use my hand to slam the door once she is out of the house. She’s already seen me naked, and I couldn’t stand to watch her see me getting hard.I shouldn’t get turned on because it was an incident. She came to find Bennett but happened not to see him.I shouldn’t even give it a second thought about what just happened a while ago, but the way she stared at me got me fucking turned on, and I started to imagine things that I was supposed not to ever think of.She is my son’s girlfriend, and that isn’t even much trouble. I am twenty years older than her, which should be the trouble.Why didn’t I know when she arrived? I didn’t know, and that was my fault. Plus, I ought to have stopped walking around the house naked all the time.It’s a bad habit for me. I do this when I’m alone and enjoying my music. It’s a sign of peace of mind when Bennett and his mom are away from home.I charge into the shower to take a bath, but I can’t get rid of her words from my head and the way she kept s
ANASTASIAIf it was so easy to wipe my memories of last night, I will do it again.I got heartbroken by his son and got dumbstruck, frozen, and my thighs shamelessly clenched by him. I can’t stop thinking about his whole expression yesterday and the way he watched me look at his body curves and the huge thing he has in between his legs.I was fucking daring; I knew it. Maybe it was the pain, but strangely, I still do not regret saying those words to him, even though he thinks I’ve gotten mad.Karina is beside me, sitting around a table where we get all sorts of coffee and stuff. She has been talking for over thirty minutes, and I haven’t really heard a single thing she has been saying.I nod, and, uh, so she doesn’t get pissed for letting her talk go to waste. Talking is one of the major things we don’t have in common. I’m reserved and a good listener, but Karina is the opposite of that.I knew she had been talking about Bennett, but I really didn’t get a thing from what she said beca
ANASTASIAEven though I’ve never met my parents, I was sure as hell that I had their genes. And the one I will forever be proud of is picking myself back up after being bruised and broken.I was the type of trash that could easily be recycled. I picked myself back up and headed to the bar for some alcohol.I couldn’t go back home. I didn’t want to be lonely when my heart was dying; I wouldn’t be able to breathe.I needed to stay outside where I could get enough air and probably drink off my sorrows. I recently started liking alcohol since Bennett started acting up.I’ve always thought alcohol was useless, but I recently figured out that it isn’t all that useless. It can stop you from feeling pain and take you to a different realm, and that was just what I needed.I drank until I began to throw up. I thought I wouldn’t be able to get up from the seat, but I was surprised at how I was able to walk and even drive.Speaking of drive, I should never have thought of coming here again. It’s
DENVERI’ve never seen a girl with such boldness. She falls asleep in Bennett’s room, and I stay for a while watching her sleep.She curls up herself in bed and pulls her knees up her chest. Even in her sleep, she looks so adorable, like a doll.She said she isn’t a little girl, but she curls and rolls up like one and has attempted to fall forward a couple of times, but I place a finger on her forehead and push her backwards so she doesn’t hit the ground. It’s light contact, only a damn finger, and yet it feels like my body has caught fire, and the flame doesn’t cease to extend through my entire body.I take a pillow from the other side of the bed and drop it in front of her so she doesn’t roll off to the ground when I’m out of the room.It looks like Bennett isn’t going to come home tonight; that’s why I took her to his room. I would have preferred the visitor room, but it would be too cold for her, especially with the way she is curling up. I can tell how vulnerable she is to the co
ANASTASIAWell, maybe I will agree with everyone at this point: Drinking is a bad thing. It induces this stupid courage in you and leaves you hanging there and staring blankly at the mess you’ve caused once the effect is gone.I’m biting my lips so hard right now because I can’t believe the mess I’ve gotten myself into.My memories of last night with Denver flood back. I press my head into the soft pillow, picturing the image of last night—how he kept staring at me and how his face remained rigid—but he's still the most handsome man I’ve seen at forty, and I can’t help but cringe at the words I said to him.And hell, no fucking way, I told him I haven’t been normal since I saw his cock. I pop my cheek as it burns red hot while I sit on the edge of the bed. How do I approach him now? I’m so embarrassed at myself.I wonder how he sees me or what he thinks of me now. Fuck, I promise that will be the last time I take alcohol again.I bring my hands to touch my lips, and my body explodes i
DENVERNew things.I’ve always been against trying out new things; I prefer to stick to the usual stuff or routine, and getting involved in new things has never been my game. New dishes. New hairstyle. New woman. Nah.This is the first time I’m violating my principles and doing things out of the ordinary. Thinking of my son’s girlfriend is out of the ordinary.But can I stop thinking of her? No.I’ve tried and can’t stop thinking of the softness of her lips, her innocent and gorgeous blue eyes, and, of course, her daring spirit.She says she doesn’t want to do boys anymore, and just the way she said it gave me relief in such a way. At least she knows what she wants, and nobody is compelling her.The problem might not be with her, but with my son. She’s Bennett’s girlfriend. I can’t compete with my son; it’s the wildest thing to think of. What if he finds out? What if I hurt him?Bennett has been my treasure since the day he was brought into this world. I love him because he came from
ANASTASIALife has always been this difficult. The difficulty in getting what you want and the ease in losing things you were trying to save while battling to get what you wanted.It sucks. Why is it so easy to lose things than gain things? If there’s a word for that, then that word is equivalent to the meaning of my life.I fucking lose all the things I thought I had and never get the things I would hold my breath for, live for, and die for. It took me an ounce of strength to say those words to him, but there was a long silence from his end, as if I had spat out venom. I fucking wanted to eat myself out. Hide my face from the surface of the earth or curl into my shell, and never stick my head out again.At least that’s what I’ve always done. Since age five, when I practically figured out that I had no dad and no mom and was with other kids who technically had the same issue as me,.I knew I was doomed. And at age ten, I started requesting who my parents were, and I was told stories
DENVERDrake doesn’t know Anastasia, and he wouldn’t be stupid enough to make this kind of bloody mistake if he knew.I just found out she is the intern student who is meant to be under me, and it’s as if the universe is coming to haunt me.It’s as if everything I was trying to avoid is coming after me, and I can’t escape it.Speaking of Anastasia, I think I made a bloody mistake pertaining to the very first time I was on the phone with her.When she pleaded not to leave her, my heart melted like acid was poured on my entire chest, as if the clock stopped ticking. I badly wanted to say something to her, if at all anything, but not to keep her silent.I had a few things to say, but my mind was on its own discussion, and I couldn’t utter a word to her. My heart wanted to explode like a volcano when I heard her cry. She must have felt really bad because she ended the call just as I was about to say something, I kept silent for too long and she might have gotten my silence wrongly.And my
ANASTASIAIt’s girls night!Since Denver is out with his stepbrother, I decided to go out with Karina to catch up on all the time I've been away.I’m with her right now, at the club where we had once visited before she found Chloe and fell in love with him.We’re sitting in the area with dim red lights, excluding a sense of privacy and anonymity. It doesn’t mean we can’t be seen by others in the club, but it doesn’t give off the flashy vibes.I’m dressed in a flowery yellow short dress purchased by Denver, and my hair is twisted in a French hairstyle. Karina is wearing a tank top and a blue trouser that’s barely covering her stomach.The waiter heads to our table, and I order my usual chocolate milkshake, and she orders her usual as well. The word obsession is real, and we are in that category, stuck with our favorite drinks."So you go first! Pour out your heart to me, girl!” I tap on the table, grinning as I wait for her to start spilling all the details I must have missed."I'm pre
DRAKEThere are only two of that necklace in the world; it was the same necklace I customized for my lost daughter and Astrid, my wife.I don’t want to assume yet, so I called Astrid to be on her way to the penthouse, where I usually relax when I need some time to think.Astrid is cool with me having a separate house to myself as long as I always come home to her. And sometimes she would meet me up at the penthouse and spend the entire night together.I sit in the bar area with a glass of whiskey and ice as I spin slowly on the bar stool. When we gave birth to our first and only child, Annabel, we had only spent a few days with her before she got stolen from us.Astrid almost died of a heart attack due to the loss of our baby; we searched everywhere for her, but we couldn’t find her. We used the same necklace, but we totally lost her.Astrid still has traumas about the loss of her baby, including the nonstop nightmare and the jerking from her sleep at night. Sometimes she says her bab
ANASTASIA“Welcome back, Anna. Don’t you think your internship should be over by now?” Chloe smirks at me, and I just stare blankly at him. But he smiles nonchalantly, like he always does."Chloe, I told you to stop picking on her. And don’t let Denver hear you speaking to her in this tone; he will cut off your balls, and I truly don’t want your balls out yet. I still want you to fuck me some more." Karina winks at me as she teases him.My face is radiant with a bright smile, and her teasing Chloe made me giggle even more. She turns to me with her arms wide spread."I'm happy to have you back. Gosh, I had no one to gossip with! You just left me all alone!” Rolling her eyes, she falls into my open arms as well.“As for you, Chloe, don’t you think you don’t deserve to be with my friend?” It’s my turn to pick on him, and this time I come with the full energy."Come on, Anna. Must you two fight all the time?” She glances at me, then back to Chloe, and the smile on my face keeps getting wi
DENVERAnastasia is fast asleep, and I can’t stop staring at her. She looked so disturbed when she saw Sandra’s call.And to make her feel at peace, I declined Sandra’s calls, whispering to her that she doesn’t have to worry anymore about Sandra or anyone.And I owe Sandra nothing; it's not compulsory to take her calls.I meant every word I said to Anastasia. I chose her, and I will continue to choose her for the rest of my life. There is no other option aside from being with her.I've thought a lot about what we are going to do together once we leave the UK and return home. Also, I don’t tell her about the surprise part yet.Since I want us to be official, I need to give her an apartment in her name. An apartment she would make her home, and even though she is the only home I want to return to, I would so much love living with her in the apartment.An apartment secured with cameras and security. This is because I know who Sandra is and how much length she can go. Aside from wanting A
ANASTASIA"Even right now.” His tempting voice immersed in my brain, and the only thing that makes sense now is this man's touch.Fuck, he couldn’t even resist as he took in my breath and I breathed in his. He brings his teeth snatching my lips and kisses me so delicately, like precious porcelain.“Gosh, I miss these fucking lips.” I murmur into his mouth. The kissing part is hot, but I can’t wait to have him deep inside me.I wrap my leg around his waist; he holds me so tight as he kisses the hell out of my lips.My nipples begin to ache, desperate for his hands on them. I think this man always has a way of making me lose my mind.Like I’m doing right now. I feel so hot; I’m not gentle as I tear off the tank top on me, leaving my boobs to fall out in front of him.His eyes darkened with temptation as he stared at my pink nipples. The lust in his eyes is alluring. In that swift moment of him staring at my hard and pink nipples, I stare at his gorgeous face.I can’t stop emphasizing how
ANASTASIAI could sense his arrival. I heard the sound of the car all the way from my room. I had just called him a few minutes before I got back home.I don't believe he is suddenly in front of my house; it's as if he abandoned everything he was doing and ran to me.I couldn’t express myself on the phone; I was short of words as tears streaked down my blue eyes. I only said a few words to him and ended the call. “You know what it means by seeing my call again, Denver.”Fuck, I miss calling his name. I miss my lips calling him mine. He has always been mine, but I had been too scared to voice it out.Now, it finally feels like I can call him mine without being scared of his reactions to it. It’s so calming thinking of how this man made me feel—not the bad part but the good ones. It’s so erotic whenever I remember the hot sex we had multiple times.God, I can’t be mad at him anymore. I should really give him a second chance. After all his efforts? I’m convinced he is truly sorry for wha
ANASTASIAD...Did he really say he loved me?Every hair on my skin stood firm the moment he whispered those words. I almost melted in his arms, but I couldn’t risk it. I still needed to trust him more.My entire life, I had been waiting for those words. I was speechless for a brief moment as my inner walls crumbled helplessly. The fact he said those words without blinking or without breaking eye contact with me sent a jolt of excitement through my bones.I wanted to jump and hug and kiss him until I could no longer breathe, but I paused. I had so much restraint from going close to him because I couldn’t break my own heart again. I broke my own heart by trusting and expecting so much from him, but I couldn’t make that same mistake again.His presence has always had effects on me, and I didn’t believe my thigh clenched when he came closer to me, and at that moment the only air I could breathe was his.I took in his fucking manly scent as my eyes ran through his broad shoulders and his
DENVER She needs me. She could be angry and hate me to the core, but my Ana needs me. I know her better than anyone else, and I’m well aware that she’s been having sleepless nights.I knew shit was hitting the fan when I couldn’t perceive her chocolate fragrance on her anymore. It only means one thing: that she’s not been taking her milkshake since she left New York, and that’s a fucking record. If she stopped taking something she's been obsessed with, then it's the scariest shit ever.The way she looked, the way her eyes lost the shine and brightness—the real Anastasia is almost gone. I can’t let that happen; I can’t do that, so I asked her close friend to go after her as soon as she ran angrily from the bar.That wasn't Ana. That was pain talking. It was the first time I had seen her that mad. I don't ever want to see that part again.Even though she doesn’t want me to go after her, there are several other ways I could use to save my Ana.Pacing about in front of the apartment wher
ANASTASIA I would be stupid if I said I wasn’t hurting. It’s been over a week since it happened, but I will never be the same again, not when I can’t erase my memories. How am I supposed to forget it like it never happened?No matter what I try, I can’t seem to forget it or what schemes I attempt to indulge in; I can’t take him off my mind, even though thinking about him hurts like hell.His name and thoughts always pop up in my head, literally unexpectedly. How can I stop thinking about him when it’s bedtime? Or when I’m about to take a bite of my meal or take a sip of my milkshake?Fuck, my world has been so entangled with him that it’s so difficult to disentangle myself.Or how the bloody fuck do I delete moments of him from my head? He’s the first person I think of when I wake up, and the freaking last person I think of when I shut these pretty eyes of mine.I know I should stop thinking about him, but I feel like I need closure to move on. I need answers to why he did those thing