CHAPTER 14

Two fvcking weeks. 

It's been two fvcking week and he's still confined in the hospital, unconcious. Two fvcking weeks since my conscience been bugging the hell out of me. I hated myself even more because of what I've did.

I've encounter a ton of failed attempts of visiting him but everytime I stood up infront of his room's door, I lost my courage. 

How dare me to visit him where, in fact, I was the one who brought that to him. I deserved it. I deserved hell. 'Di ko na dapat s'ya nilalapitan. 

I can still remember how my heart leap as I heard the news that he's awake. After fvcking weeks of hell, finally. Para akong nabunutan ng tinik sa nabalitaan 

I heard that the doctor didn't discharged him right after his awakening, so I haven't seen him not util now.

"We're here!" I stood up as I heard Tita Teressa screams as she enters the main door. 

It's also been one, another week since I heard the news. 

Hindi alam si Tita Teressa na isa ako sa mga dahilan kung bakit muntik nang mamatay ang anak n'ya. I felt a sudden pinch in my chest, a guilt, I think. She and her husband quickly got back from their trip after hearing the news about their son way back then. Worry is written all over their face and I felt so sorry for that. 

I am cruel. 

"Molly, anak, look who's with me," Tita Teressa announced.

My heart skipped a beat, it feels like it's jumping out of my ribcage as a pair of hazel eyes locked to mine. 

I missed those eyes. I missed how irritation crept through my veins when I met those mischievous and sometime smug pair of hazel eyes before. Because now, I could see nothing but a plain, empty, look that severely chills down my spine. His looks made me shiver and weakened my knees.

Comparing how he looks before and now, he have bandages on his right temple some smaller bruises all over his face including his lower lips that almost healed, and sling on his right arm. 

Look what you've fvckingdone, Molly. Look at the mess you've done to him.

Magkahalong emosyon ang dumaloy sa buong sistema ko. Gusto ko s'yang lapitan at yakapin, may parte sa 'kin na gustong tumakbo, umalis at magtago, may parte rin sa 'kin ang gustong umiyak. 

I missed him, so much.

We both staring at each for maybe ten fvcking seconds. I could feel my tongue tied. No words came from my mouth. Pakiramdam ko rin ay nakalimutan ko kung paano huminga. 

Until he turned his glance from my head to foot and shift his gaze away from me.

It feels like my heart got stabbed 567 times as he walked passed me. 

I felt like crying. No. Screw it! I will not crying! Gulp back the tears you fvcking eyes.

"Naging ganyang s'ya simula no'ng magising s'ya," sadness is visible on her tone. I turned my gaze back to her and she just gave me a comforting smile. "Hayaan muna natin."

I looked down and nodded.

We remained living in the same roof. Our rooms are still next to each other. We can still sometimes see each other every morning and evening. There must no way missing him, right? 

But I'm still missing him.

Damn much. 

A part of me wants to talk to him and to say sorry everytime our eyes locked, but there's also part of me got coward more than wants to apologize. 

I don't deserve a forgiveness. Why would I ask for it? I deserved to be hated. 

"I'll quit," I spoke, full of determination.

I been through a lot of troubles, I been through a lot of harms. Of all those two fvcking years, I just now realized. I didn't just ruining my life on this point, I'm also ruined someone's trust.

Everything seems turned upside-down now. I'm into befriending with troubles before. I just watching my gang members beating someone mercilessly, I just enjoyed underground fight, and racings that I know it'll take my life in just a single snap of misfortune, disregarding everyone.

I can't take these anymore. I wants to make things right.

A frown crept all over his face. "Magbabagong buhay ka na?" tanong ng lalaking kaharap ko.

I shrugged and sat the chair in front of him.

He laughed and shook his head. "Molly, hindi ganoon kadali 'yon, alam mo ba?"

I stared at him for seconds, looking at him seriously. "Eros, I already know. Naging substitute mastermind ka lang. At hindi mo pa rin mababago na napataob kita sa karera nang paulit-ulit." I slowly shook my head.

Bigla s'yang tumayo at hinawakan ang kwelyo ko. "Ungas ka pa rin pala e!"

I arched my brows and took off his hands on my collars. "Definitely. Mas ungas pa rin ako sayo. So now, just tell me what's the consequences are. I'll face all of them. Just don't ever touch Desmond again even if the asshole, Daryll will order it."

◇◇◇

I never expected it'll as simple as picking wild leaves. I thought I'll be facing fifty plus hit of metal pipes from each of the fifty plus members of the said gang, without letting you fighting back nor defense yourself.

I somehow sigh in a slight relief for I can still able to fight for myself and defend. I'll be facing one underground fight again, for the last time.

The scent of different kind of cigarette spreads all over the place. The noise, there's a crowd cheering, watching us in every corner. The last time I went here, I was cheated by my opponent. I was bruised and too weak to run away as the police came, I got caught and quickly thrown to Italia by my goddamn Dad. 

I avoided being here for I didn't want to be thrown in Italia by my Father again. But here I am again. I'll be willingly fly back with my grandparents after this. I am wilIing to put bruised and cuts in my skin, to suffer a great injury... or die.

A hard and keen elbow severely hit my jaw before I get up from the floor. Now, I'm fell back and slammed on the floor once again. 

I raised my head and threw her a death glare. She just twirl her turquoise colored hair and grins at me. 

Kakapasok ko pa lang dito sa ring at agad n'ya akong inatake ng kan'yang malakas na sipa.

Bullshit. Lahat nalang ba ng mga nakakalaban ko dito marurumi maglaro?

Sa lahat lahat ng pwedeng makalaban ko mula sa ibang grupo, itong nakakarinding babae.

Muli n'ya hinila paangat ang nakataling buhok ko hanggang sa makaharap ko ang mukha n'ya. 

"You were as dumb as I expected." 

I hate high pitched speaking girls. I hate girly giggles, especially girly scent of strawberries came from the bubble gum that she seems chewing in her entire existence.

"And you were as smell as my step-mom's deodorant."

Her jaw dropped because of my unexpected comeback. Her eyes also widens.

I grab the chance to hit her nose using my head and stood up at the speed of light and kick her face using my knees. 

She lied on her back as she quickly stood up to for defense. She held her nose that is now bleeding. I could see how her lips pursed in rage and glared at me.

I smirked. I pulled the sleeve of my gray shirt up, bent and gestured her to come near me using my both index fingers.

And then, she attacked me. 

She's fvcking fast, so I moved  faster as I can to defense all of her attacks and to hit her on his weak spot, which is her face, her stomach, and knees.

She looked so enrage everytime I attacked her face. No wonder, she might did plastic surgery and I might ruined her face back to its ugly formation. Now she has black eye on his left eye, swollen nose, and bruised all over her body.

After an hour of attacks and defense, we both looked bruised and wounded. I also had a cut in the side of my lips, I could feel the sting on my temple that is severely injured.

She's fvcking good in elbowing. I can't deny it. 

Our both shoulders are moving up and down, panting, gasping for air, looked like a mess, exhaustion is very visible.

She let out a high pitched roar as she ran towards me but I avoided her and kick her feet instead that leads her face to fall on the ground hard.

The crowd oww-ed. Isang malaking mahihiyan ang madapa dahil lang doon. Isa iyong katangahan at kalampahan.

Umupo s'ya paharap sa 'kin, at dahan-dahan s'yang umatras gamit ang dalawang kamay na nakasuporta sa bawat gilid at sumisipa na paa. Habang ako naman ay patuloy na humahakbang papalapit sa kan'ya.

Masamang tingin pa rin ang iginawad n'ya sa akin ngunit may nakita akong takot na nakatago sa kan'yang mga mata.

I stared at her blankly. "I need to make you unconscious," I uttered.

Now, she repeatedly shook her head and fear expression appeared over her face. "No. Please"

I took a step forward. 

"No, no, no." Her voice are now pleading. "Please, please."

I took another step forward and her scared expression suddenly replaced a grin.

Then, she surpass a wicked giggle after.

My eyes turned to her hands that is now clasping a dagger. That was came from her back.

Close behind her, I could see Eros smirking at me like he did a great achievement.

"Boo," he mouthed.