Olivia passed away in a car accident six months ago. I was in New York at that time for a meeting to attend with Robbie. I was there for a week. During that one-week separation, we remained connected through calls and texts. We even had phone sex the morning of her death.
I cracked the deal; it was a significant one for the company and mostly for my masculine ego. We had a modest dinner with the clients after that; I went to Tiffany and Co., yes, to purchase a ring for Olivia.
I had no clue what came to me that night. It just felt right. After all, she was with me all the time, she never complained, smiled every time, even the two times I brought her home for Sunday dinner. She was so friendly with everyone. So I thought the next step of marriage between us made sense, maybe.
I chose a cushion-cut sapphire with small diamonds all around it for her, an emerald, and a sparkling ring. She once disclosed her love for the material, so I figured out why not give her something that she would cherish.
I was at the airport, waiting for my flight that got suspended because of turbulence. I tried to call Olivia, but her phone was switched off. I texted her, but no reply came. I knew she was supposed to be with Samantha and her girl group. Maybe her phone died, that happened with Olivia a lot. She used to forget to charge her phone.
I was at the lounge of the airport with Robbie, watching football and passing jokes when my brother Owen called me. Owen calling didn’t feel weird, but when he didn’t speak for a few minutes, that felt creepy.
“Olivia is at the hospital. She was in an accident. Hit and run. A truck driver hit her car and ran away.” He hesitated for a second. “The car was wrecked when the medic reached there, and Olivia was gone. According to the doctors, Olivia died on the spot. The police identified the truck driver but said Olivia was driving carelessly. Also, because of the rain, the highway was slippery. He couldn’t see the car coming. They found liquor in her blood, police confirm that drunk driving causes the accident. The driver was free to go as the police looked at the CCTV footage of the accident. They think the driver has no-fault.” Owen stopped for seconds again. I heard him taking a big breath as if he was bracing to inform me of the worst.
“Olivia was four weeks pregnant. The baby and Olivia are no more. I am sorry, Brian.”
My gaze was on the 60-inch TV of the airport lobby. Italy scored a goal, all the players were celebrated by group hugging. They were ecstatic. A massive grin on all of their faces while I was distant. At that moment, I felt someone spilled a bucket of ice water all over my torso.
Then there was pain, a harsh, sharp pain. I couldn’t locate the place, but the pain was so much that I almost hated myself for feeling that.
She was dead. Olivia was gone. I touched the ring box that was in my pants pocket. This was supposed to be in her hand, but she was gone. Olivia is no more.
Then the second wave came in. A child, four weeks of pregnancy. That was the time nausea hit me fast and hard. It’s impossible that she got pregnant with a child. We never used condoms or any kind of protection. She took pills, and I knew she was on them. But having a child is out of the question, at least for me. So, the answer was obvious: she cheated on me with another man.
No way in the world can explain that I am the father of that child. Impossible.
I went to my doctor immediately on my return to Chicago; I tested all the things they told me. If the results came positive, then I would be the father. Somewhere in my heart, I wanted that to be true. My brain already labeled Olivia as a cheat, but my heart wanted that to be wrong.
I felt hopeful, damn I wanted to feel that. Maybe I wanted to be a father, a child of my own would be a great idea, so I hoped. But truth and reality are way different from our so-called hope. I knew that after hearing from my doctors.
The result was as clear as day and night. There is only a 2% chance of me becoming a father.
The verdict was clear, and Olivia was the traitor.
“Was she pregnant with your child?” Inessa covers her mouth in horror.
“What? No, that little limp on her belly wasn’t mine.” I snap.
“What?”
She is confused, comprehensible. I was out of my fucking mind when I found out the truth, so I don’t blame Inessa for her bewilderment. Wish I could find the father of her child or the man with whom she cheated. I swear I would bury that bastard with her in the same grave. The only difference will be she was dead, and he was alive.
Isn’t it lovely? Two eternal lovers lying on the same ground together, what a match made in heaven that would be.
I tried to find him, but I didn’t know where to start, whom to talk to, where to find him. I manhunt her apartment to find a small piece of information or anything that would help me track down the man; however, nothing came out. I failed. After a week of rummaging through her apartment, I gave up.
I didn’t even attend her funeral; I didn’t think she deserved that respect from me. People thought I was so much in grief that I couldn’t see her going. Hell, my own family still fancy this idea.
They all are wrong as usual. I hate her so much that even her entombment made me vomit.
I left her all alone, that’s way better than how she left me, broken, shattered, wrecked, in darkness, losing trust in the female gender once again. History repeats once again, pure déjà vu.
“How do you know the baby was not yours?” Inessa starts arguing with me. “You two were sexually active, so there is a possibility you made her pregnant.” She keeps going with her useless theory, defending my treacherous dead girlfriend. I wonder how well she will react when I reveal the truth.
“I just know, my dear wife.” This stops her.
We both sit in silence for a few heartbeats. She is furious, I can see the fire in her eyes. She is ready to jump from the other side of the table to kill me with her outrage the next chance she gets.
I think of revealing the truth, but what’s the point? It’s not like that will do any good now, so I stay quiet and try to enjoy the food on my plate. They are good, by the way.
The rest of the dinner goes by, food comes, we eat, then another course, then another.
We eat, no talk. I can feel the accusation in her eyes, she is talking to herself in her mind, cursing me for what I believe or did to Olivia. A few times, I find her staring at me, but I keep my mouth shut. No point fighting with her about something that I knew. Only if she knew the truth.
We come back to our room and Inessa shields herself in her favorite place, the bathroom. I don’t know she has some kind of fetish, kink, or she is really inside there to fresh herself.
I stand in front of the balcony, checking the email that Linda was supposed to send me for reviewing the contract we are going to sign with a Chinese company.
I was in the middle of work when Inessa comes out of the bathroom in a white see-through nightgown. The garment is flimsy. I can see her black thong and pale pink nipples. In a sense, she is naked in front of me, this dress is made to kill the male nation without using any hint. Inessa wears this as an act of revenge on me.
If this is the punishment of avoiding her all day, then, baby, I am glad to take it.
“Come here.” My voice is harsh, sharp as a knife, cold as ice.
Inessa stares at me. We both are communicating through our eyes. Where we are talking, arguing, I see the hesitation in her eyes, the twitch of her lips, the strain on her face, the desire and lust. She slowly comes to me.
Under the starry night, she takes my waiting hands, and I lead her to the middle of the balcony. I want to have her here under the starry sky, with the witness of the little stars in the sky. The darkness of the night adds miscue to our situation. I don’t care or mind; I am happy to have her here or anywhere as long as she doesn’t object.
With a swift snapping, her dress fell to the ground, her breathing becomes rough. I can hear the sound getting lousy with my every touch. What will she do if I reveal my actual intention to her? I am sure that will freak her out.
All the fantasies that I am having the time I am away from her will scare her. So I keep my mouth shut and my hand at work on her elegant naked body.
Tonight I don’t go for foreplay. I don’t know if I will last that long if I choose to go that way. I toss her into the air; her legs come around my waist and she locks them just near my butt. I pin her on the wall and kiss her senselessly; I don’t care about anything else, just her and me, the kiss and the stars.
Inessa responds to my kisses with kisses, she tugs me by pulling my hair with her soft small hand, her hands are messaging them roughly, her body is shaking with needs, and, dude, I am loving this moment.
I free my cock from my brief, it’s hard and motionless as a rod. I need to have this thing inside her wet pussy, otherwise, it will kill me, tear apart the lace thong she was wearing her dress, Inessa moans, and with a quick thrust, my cock is inside her.
“Brian.” She cries out.
I wait for a second, kissing her temples, giving her time, then I move, fucking slowly for a minute before thrusting as hard as I can, as fast my body allows.
“You are so beautiful, baby.” I push myself more inside her. “Every time you are in the room, I lose all my control.” I kiss her beautiful, swollen lips. “All I think about is your pussy and me being inside your lovely pink hole.” I shovel my entire length into her tight opening. This makes Inessa scream.
“Shh. It’s fine.” Stop my activities for a few seconds. I kiss her nose and start moving again.
Between the kisses and rough thrust, we both have our orgasm. The climax hits us like lightning, strikes the right place without the notifications, and I spill my hot seeds inside her.
Inessa comes undone, she falls over my chest like a paper doll; I hold her tightly in my embrace and take her to the bed. Our body is clinging to one another, the sweat makes it worse; however, neither of us mind that.
Inessa keeps her head on my chest, her breathing becomes even, and I realize she is falling into the land of dreams.
I stay awake a little bit more; I listen to the rhythm of her breathing, feel the touch of her hand that is placed on my sternal, listen to the music that she is making by inhaling oxygen, and slowly drift to sleep with peace in my heart.
I open my eyes and see my husband’s eyes are on me; he is peering at me, his facial expression is the same as always, the blank one. His gazes are drawing a map all over my face. Sometimes his gaze stops here and there, zone out at my eyes or lips before resuming the art once again.I don’t know what’s going on inside his head, but I know he is studying, three lines appear on his forehead and prove my assumption right. He is in deep thought. Is he thinking about Olivia or Samantha?I can understand if he is reminiscing about Olivia. They were together for a long time; they have a history, her sudden death may be left a scar on his heart, he even confessed about proposing to her for marriage. I respect that. I like his integrity towards her; I don’t want to fight with Olivia; she has a place in his heart, and I am okay with that.But if it’s Samantha, I am going to lose my mind. That girl slept with my father,
“Let’s swim.”“No way.”“Come here, talky. You are wasting our time.”“I am not going anywhere near water.”“Seriously, Inessa. I never think of you as a party popper.”“Ha, I am not. I just like to stay dry. You can go feel your adolescence in the water.”“I am going but I am taking you with me.”“Brian McCoy, you better stand back. Don’t you dare to come near me? Go away, you filthy gigantic humanoid ”“Let’s dive into the water, honey.”“Brian, you fatuous man. Did you just put me on your shoulder like a cave dweller? The damn. Did you just spank me?”“Shut it, let’s drive into the blue ocean.”“I will die. Dear world, today is my last day on this planet. Please, be familiar with my murderer. He is none other than my husba
“We are here.” Even texts me during lunch.“See you, guys, tonight.” I text him back.I am a pretty social individual; I have thousands of opponents, but I have more allies than that. Every vacation I spent in my life, my friends were constantly with me. Being on this trip without them at first felt weird.It is the first time. Even when I am not in Chicago for work, one or two of my friends are with me as they also work with me. They are my clients or investors. Therefore, I am never alone on trips.Olivia never objects when our friends accompany us. She was more than thrilled to embrace them. Moreover, there was nothing intimate or romantic between us. Maybe that’s the reason we were both or comfortable having our friends with us.I don’t have a clue how Inessa will react to this decision, though. I mean, the last two days were great. We were chatting, giggling, strolling around the islan
This man, this bloody fellow, has the audacity to snuggle with a woman in presence of my eyes. Wow, he is worst, worse than my papa. At least papa did everything behind his wives’ backs, nobody know about his crummy job until he appealed for a divorce from his wives.That’s better, occasionally it’s convenient to remain blindfolded, you don’t need to identify everything in your life or every detail of the surrounding characters. It will make our life way more easy for us.The further we know the rough side of the person beside us, the better we seek to get away from that person, even if we love that person from the bottom of our souls.Love can’t prevail against everything. Sometimes the demon inside us triumphs over the love unless we are strong enough to fight back with the same intensity and courage. For many people, that’s a hard job to do, that’s why love always takes setbacks soon or later.
8 November 2020 Sunday, 4 am. Zoom meeting between Brian McCoy and psychiatrist Dr. Mia Smith.“How is married life behaving towards you?” Mia asks.This is the first time I am having this session with her after my marriage, I became busy and missed at least two of my appointments with Mia. Also, I need to stay in London for a specific time. First, I thought I would be done in a day or two, but now it is a week.Honestly, I was more than happy when I missed those appointment dates; I recall having an evil smile paste on my face. Just like the kid who doesn’t want to go to school and finally succeeds in taking a day off for a garbage reason.I must say I enjoyed this break from Mia a lot, even though the rest of the trip was a kind of going to the gutter at the end.I am here working my ass off on this business deal; I need to excel in this, no matter what. My want for achieving perfection is getting worse da
It’s been a week since I came home, a week since I last saw my moron husband, a week of loneliness, this is the longest time I have stayed at home alone.I should resume my work, lead on the new project that I have thought of doing for a long time now, but I can’t. No matter how hard I tried to emphasize it in my work, it’s just not working. I need to arrange an event for securing the fund that we need to build shelters for women.There are a lot of women on the road, they can use the housing as a temporary solution for them until they find something appropriate for themselves. A refuge camp for all kinds of women where we will help them to find their life back, an auction will be enough to collect the money.I want something different kind of event to organize, these dances, or not a regular auction, something fun and where people will have no problem shower their money.The problem is I am having trouble with my
“Did you find the guy?” I bark on the phone as soon as my brother Owen calls me to update me on the present hazard situation that we are going through.The top floor where all our sibling’s offices are located was in the fire a day ago, some important document for the next board of meeting had been snatched from my desk drawer, someone hacked Viola’s computer took away information for a forthcoming auction bid that our company is expected to involve, Owen’s computer has been destroyed which cause us to miss the latest flies of the London project that we are working on.It seriously injured three of my employees in this fire. They are in hospital but out of emergency. I am just gratified that no one is badly wound, although the fire was severe enough to cause some deterioration that happened.The particular information I know all about this sudden chaos is that Nathan fucking Hall is the one liable for this and
“I am sorry.” “I am so sorry.”He said the words, everybody, the Chicago no, this time I should go for a bigger crowd, all the people around the globe. If you have ever met or known the great Brian McCoy, I want you to acknowledge that he said sorry to me tonight a few seconds ago. In the dark bedroom, with the tiny bit of moonlight in serene surroundings, he said those words. He expresses regret for hurting me, and believe me, this is the happiest hour in my twenty-year life.I can’t waste this time at all, I need to make sure or at least do something to preserve this moment; I know this kind of moment is rare and will never come back again. Maybe this is my once-in-a-lifetime kind of phenomenon. I can’t let this go this easily. It will be a waste then.I pick my phone from the nightstand and open the voice recorder, and hold it in front of Brian’s mouth.“Say it again.”
2 years later “Dada, we are going to be late. Hurry up.” Mavin, our son, roars. This is his morning custom. He wakes up before everyone in this house and starts screaming for us to start our day. Morning sex is now just a delightful dream for us. Mavin doesn’t allow a minute for Brian and me to have some delicious morning sex. “Mama, you need to be in a hurry, too. Today is the parent’s day of my school.” “We should throw his get-up-and-go thing out of the window,” Brian murmurs. “I’m starting to hate kids again.” “You love him and kids too,” I mumble in sleep. “That’s why you adopted him after proposing to me for marriage. And the little girl Aurora we are adopting tomorrow is also your decision, Mr. McCoy.” “I am going to regret it again. I have a feeling, you know.” “Mama, dada, hurry up.” Mavin thwacks on our bedroom door. Two years ago, on my graduation
I can’t believe my eyes for what they are seeing, my ears for what they are hearing, and my mind is having a tough time with all this stuff.He is here in front of me, drinking coffee, saying sorry for all his delinquency, declaring his passion and devotion for me, giving us a chance to make up. He is asking me out on a date.Okay, Mr. Brain, one thing at a time. My depressed heart can’t take all these revelations without experiencing a heart attack.I close my eyes and think about Brian’s monologue, and it demonstrably made me the happiest person. I should have recorded the conversation between us to hear the words out of his mouth again and again. It will be so fun, damn it, I missed it. I don’t perceive why, but seeing Brian pinning me over, or so much despondency for me, the anguish that his eyes hold, I love it.I am officially a dreadful person. I should feel bad for his suffering, but here I am enjoyin
Inessa, the woman I fell in love with, is standing right in front of me. My wife is still the same. Nothing changed in these three long weeks when we were apart from one another. If anything, she becomes more magnificent; she is shining more than ever; the moonlight shines her glorious long hair luminously. The big, round green eyes draw me instantaneously, the pink full lips that I am dying to stain red with my lips.God, I missed her so much. These three weeks without her was simple torture, which I deserve with no doubt. Honestly, I ask more than that. Maybe a whack or a blow will be less compared to what I did to her.I accept the fact and was ready to leave her alone for life. But in the end, I failed.After reading the letter Inessa left for me, I realized how churlish I was in our marriage with her. And that’s not civil to her or any woman on this globe. No one deserves to be affronted by their better half.But I did th
Three weeks later,Life goes on. I get settled in my apartment with Mavin the night I leave Brian, our marriage, and our house.I wept the first week was the toughest to pass with everything in my mind and the current development as a single parent; it was stifling at a point. Of course, Maria is still here for me, it’s rough.Without having Brian by my side, I understand I indirectly depended on him for many things. The way we experienced our lives for the last two months was incredible.Every morning waking up simultaneously, having sex in the shower, eating breakfast, leaving together for my college and his office as most of the time he gave me a ride, coming home, waiting for him, dinner with marvelous food and giggle, cuddle on the couch with a movie on the background or his work on the laptop, falling on the bed together, having sex, cuddling again before collapsing in the dream in one another’s ar
The sound is growing heavier. I try not to give any attention to that act what I am doing but nope, this fucking noise is just getting rowdy. I settle the cushion over my head to cut off the echo from wherever that is showing up. With my two hands, I put pressure around my ears over the cushion in order to kill the vibration. It still doesn’t work.“Fuck it.” I get up from the bed and sit down in the midst of the bed.Because of my hasty movement, I lose my balance and almost fall down on the bed again. I hold my skull with two of my hands and scream. The thumping noise that feels as if a hammer was striking some metal material is nowhere but in my head.The headache that I am dealing with right now is the clanging noise that wakes me up from my sleep when I finally enjoy nights of sleep after so many sleepless nights.“You are up, big guy?” Robbie’s head peeps through the door.“What
Brian is sitting on the couch, drinking hard liquid with a poker face when I enter the apartment with sleepy Mavin in my arms. I expected a frown, questions, curious looks seeing a baby in my arms, but I got nothing. He doesn’t even look at me when I pass the living room to get in the guest room. He sits on his couch, eyes on the ceiling to floor window, observing the night sky with deep-rooted courtesy.All the way from the hospital to home, my heart was thumping so damn quick that I almost passed away in uneasiness. God, it is still beating fast.In my head I keep arranging my conclusions, forming sentences. How to apply the appropriate words, lines, sentences to break the news to him is all I could think about.I realize it’s already late. I should have finished this for the first time I went to see Molly, but I didn’t know why I held myself back from talking about this with Brian.Particularly, I am ashamed of
“Sir, you have an eleven-clock meeting with the investors later, another with Mr. Curtis around 5 pm, and the dinner meeting with Mr. Dean Harper,” Linda confirms my to-do list for the day, like all the time.This is the first thing Linda does every morning. She confirms my work timetable, takes note if I need something or needs to do something after that she goes to her, and I give attention to mine.Except for today, there is a disaster.I wanted to talk to Inessa last night about her changing attitude. She’s coming home late, it is growing into a pattern for her now, the fastest she comes home is 10 pm after dinner, occasionally it’s after 12 am.Every time I asked her where she was, she said lies. Sometimes she was with Veronica, which was a white lie. I saw the messages between them. Veronica is not talking to her. She is currently angry after the auction incident between us.Sometimes she would s
Things are getting messy as days are passing. Molly and Mavin get settled in my apartment that I got from my father on my eighteenth birthday. The gift was to show the world how good a father Andrew Simmons is or to show the money he has on his bank account.Whatever the reason was, I am happy to have a place of my own.It’s been a week since they moved in and started over a new life. I am getting to know Mavin a little, but, honestly; I don’t get much time to spend with him. The auctions Hazel and Miles Brian take the major time of my day; after that, I need to study for my final exam that is coming up in two months. With all this stress going on, on top of that, Vero is not talking to me because Brian blackmailed her to do something that she didn’t want to do.Vero didn’t respond to any of my texts or talk to me when we were on campus. She isn’t even sitting with me during classes.With all this, it&r
Inessa and I pick up Hazel and Miles after the party. Maria was expected to join us, but she has something significant to do.We don’t really need Maria that way. It was Inessa who insisted that Maria join us, and I didn’t have any problem, so I gave her the nod. I have a cook and some other staff at my mansion in Naperville, where we will go tomorrow morning to spend a day together before Hazel leaves.Once upon a time, I vowed to stay away from Simmon’s absurdity, but I feel for Inessa. After finding out Hazel will be out of Chicago in no time, she starts to get upset. Even if she doesn’t claim anything, I know her heart is sinking thinking about the separation of her dear sister.The way she packed our house with her sibling’s pictures or the way she talks about them with a tender grin and glory in her eyes is verification of the unconditional affection that she possesses in her heart from them.Even