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21| It’s Official (pt. 2)
Last Updated:
2023-12-11 12:14:48Related chapters
Toxic Paradise 22| Surf’s Up (pt. 1)
"So, you feel better today now that we went to bed early last night?" Ryan asked as he took a bite of his bagel. We were both sitting at the kitchen table, enjoying a simple breakfast of bagels and yogurt.I sipped my coffee. "Yeah, kind of. I actually didn't go to bed that early though; I couldn't sleep.""Really? How come?" He pressed."I was talking to Maddie for a while, and she told me David is in another official relationship. I guess I was just really in my head about it," I answered honestly. “It just seems too soon…” "Oh no, Jay, I'm sorry. Are you doing okay?"I nodded, "Yeah, I am now. Full disclosure, and I don't know how you'll feel about this, but Alec was up last night, and he talked with me about it. He actually did help me a little."Ryan's jaw tightened for a second and I was nervous about what he was going to say next. "Speak of the devil," he finally said, fixing his gaze somewhere behind me.I turned around to see Alec strolling into the kitchen. My heart did a s
Last Updated : 2023-12-13Toxic Paradise 23| Surf’s Up (pt. 2)
Finally, about 45 minutes later, we arrived at the beach. As I fumbled with my seatbelt and gathered my beach bag, I was surprised by the sound of my door opening. I looked just in time to see that Alec had opened my door for me. I shot him a smile as I jumped out of the car.Ryan lead the way as we made our way over to a small, blue building that looked like a little shed. It had a large sign out front with different purchase options, and paintings of surf boards on either side. I noticed the price of the surf lesson on the sign and immediately turned to Alec."I can do the lesson by myself... really, please don't pay that much just so I don't look lame and alone." I wasn't expecting the lessons to cost 70 bucks for an hour. I thought maybe 30–40 max.As I was speaking to him, I noticed his eyes were fixated on the shed. When I turned to look, I realized what he was staring at. The girl in the window was absolutely gorgeous.She was tall— really tall, slender, and had long blonde hai
Last Updated : 2023-12-13Toxic Paradise 24| Pop Up!
I don't know what I was expecting from a surf lesson— I guess I just thought that it would be more intense. The beginning of the lesson was actually pretty boring because it was just Noah explaining the different parts of the board and the logistics of surfing. I sat stiffly next to Alec while the other couple next to us cuddled up, kissing at random and inappropriate intervals. I assumed they were probably newlyweds.On occasion, my back would brush against Alec's arm and I would quickly sit up, hoping he didn't notice. I wasn't sure why he was sitting so close to me anyway. I tried my best to focus on Noah as he spoke, especially since he spent most of his opening information looking directly at me.Next, he had us practice "popping up" on our boards while still on the sand. I'm not gonna lie, I was nervous to attempt this. I watched the ease and agility in which Alec moved, "popping up" like a pro. He certainly didn't need this lesson; I could tell.I, on the other hand, was tryin
Last Updated : 2023-12-14Toxic Paradise 25| The Happiest of Hours
"To Jayna completely eating shit in front of the hot surf instructor," Ryan teased, holding up his whisky sour. I watched Alec hold up his beer, chuckling along with Ryan.I held up my tequila sunrise, shooting daggers at them both. "Or... how bout to the fact that the two of you made it through almost a full day without killing each other." I knew this was kind of risky to say... but also, it was true. They both looked to be having a nice time, and I thought they should acknowledge it.They both looked at each other, shrugging their shoulders before we clinked our glasses together in cheers.We didn't have to go far to find this restaurant. In fact, it was right on the beach. The restaurant was half inside, half outside. Where we were seated outside, the ground was made up of wooden slats that resembled a boardwalk, with some tables, booths, and a large tiki bar with stools. If you followed the boardwalk past the bar, you would end up back on the sand, next to a DJ where other people
Last Updated : 2023-12-15Toxic Paradise 26| Saved You Again
As Alec and I moved together, we fell into a comfortable silence. It almost felt natural— the two of us moving together like this; one of his hands wrapped around mine while the other was placed firmly on my lower back.I knew this was wrong. One reason being that I truly wasn't in a good headspace to really open up and let someone in. Another reason being that the man giving me butterflies has a very intricate family relationship with one of my friends; a relationship that I can't even begin to understand. And lastly, Ryan aside, this was Alec. Alec was... well... a dick, and a player, so after all I've been through and my fears of abandonment, I knew he probably wouldn't be the safest option for me."Oh look," Alec pulled me from my thoughts, "your boyfriend decided to see for himself that we're actually dancing."I looked over to notice the man from before had now moved onto the sand with some of his buddies. His eyes were glued to Alec and I as he took a swig of his beer. "God.
Last Updated : 2023-12-15Toxic Paradise 27| Little Victories
Waking up the next morning, I felt good. I couldn't help smiling as I reminisced on the events of yesterday. Overall, I had fun, and I knew that it was the best day yet when it came to interactions between Alec and Ryan.After we got home last night, Ryan did end up confronting me again about my dancing with Alec. I promised him that it was nothing, and as far as telling the truth, in my mind, this wasn't exactly a lie. I knew whatever I felt for Alec could never be anything anyway, so why even worry Ryan for no reason? However, the truthful part of my brain knew I couldn't deny that dancing with him was amazing, and it gave me more butterflies than I'd ever felt before."You don't have to worry," I had said to Ryan, "but.. how about you two? Seemed like you were having fun today?" I knew this question was a good way to gather information while also changing the topic.It worked, and Ryan didn't press me further before answering. "Yeah... today was nice but it doesn't change the fac
Last Updated : 2023-12-16Toxic Paradise 28| Under the Sea (pt. 1)
"That's gross," I stated, staring at the crusty snorkel gear in Alec's hand. He had just grabbed some gear from the garage and was assessing them before we put them into the car."It's not gross; it's just sand in there... I think..." Alec said, holding up one of the snorkels in better light."And that's supposed to go in your mouth? It literally looks moldy," I argued. There was no way I was about to use that particular snorkel. "Let's just take the flippers and go buy new goggles and snorkels? I doubt you want to put that in your mouth either."He gave it one more once over, turning it over in his hands before tossing it into the trunk. "Fine... we can stop and get more, but I'm bringing these for the goggles just incase it's cheaper to just buy a mouthpiece.""Okay, thanks!" I said before making my way to the passenger side door. I gave it a tug just to realize it was locked.I waited patiently while Alec got into the driver's side, taking his sweet time to settle in before finally
Last Updated : 2023-12-16Toxic Paradise 29| Under the Sea (pt. 2)
I hesitated, allowing my feet to adjust to the temperature. "Fuck, it's cold! The other beach was warmer," I complained."Don't be a wimp; let's go," Alec persuaded."I just need to go slow to adjust," I informed, taking another few steps and stopping.I watched as Alec rolled his eyes, taking a few quick steps back in my direction."What are you doing?" I questioned. I had a bad feeling as I took in the expression on his face.He didn't answer me, instead, he grabbed me around the waist and lifted my feet off the ground as he walked us both deep into the water. My body was pressed tightly to him, keeping my front kind of warm as my back was assaulted by the cool water."Fuck—fine! You win; I'm in! Put me down," I squealed.He chuckled. "Put your goggles on first. The sand dropped off and you won't be able to touch here."He released his tight grip on me enough so that I could move my goggles from the top of my head to cover my eyes."Put your snorkel in your mouth, and test both of t
Last Updated : 2023-12-16
Latest chapter
Toxic Paradise Epilogue (pt. 2)
Unfortunately, I didn't get to spend much time with Alec between the wedding and dinner, since the wedding party had to take pictures. I was able to see him just long enough for him to give me his jacket, and a quick kiss, before he headed to the bar. I told him not to get too drunk until I got back, but who even knew with him. He went crazy for free alcohol… as did I. It was awkward taking so many pictures with David by my side. But, he and I were civil, and as promised, I was there for him during the hard times with his mother. She was currently getting treatment, and so far she seemed to be responding well. There haven’t been any new tumors, and most of the original ones were gone or shrinking. We definitely had high hopes for her, and his family seemed to he doing quite well all things considered. Alec was also surprisingly cool about my role in David's life; after I explained it all, he understood and supported me being there for him as a friend. Albeit a distant friend- but
Toxic Paradise Epilogue (pt. 1)
6 months had passed since that night at my apartment. I still couldn't believe how fast the 6 months had gone by since Alec and I decided to officially be together. I'm not exaggerating when I say that this could have been the best 6 months of my life. For the first few months, Alec and I had a long distance relationship, and honestly, it wasn't always easy. I loved Alec, but he still knew how to push my buttons just as he always had, and I couldn't help but get under his skin sometimes too. The distance made this even more irritating since we were getting plenty of the banter and not enough of the physical connection.Sometimes, I would think that the distance was just too much, but then, he would show up at my apartment. He always had the timing perfect. It was like, when I was feeling like I needed him, he was always there. Maybe he felt the same way about me too in those moments; I liked to believe we were connected in that way. Occasionally, if he had to work, he would fly me o
Toxic Paradise 68| Worth Fighting For
Oh god, I freaked out, pushing against Alec's chest to move him further into the hallway... this was the worst timing ever. I followed him out, my hand still on his chest as I closed the door behind me. "Alec... what are you doing here?" I managed to ask. My heart was thudding so hard in my chest I was starting to worry about my health. It had been less than 2 weeks since I left Siesta Key, but damn... I missed him so much. He was so handsome, and as per usual, he smelled so good; so familiar. I just wanted to throw my arms around him and forget about our fight; forget about the fact that he walked away from me; and forget about the fact that David was down on one knee just on the other side of my door. But, the angry and confused look on Alec's face stopped me from doing what I wanted. "Well..." he said, "I guess it doesn't really matter why I'm here now." "Of course it matters!" I said, "Should I ask David to leave?" All I wanted in this moment was to have him tell me "yes." I
Toxic Paradise 67| Mistakes
As David sauntered into my place, I couldn't help but to be irritated by how easily he made himself comfortable. He shrugged off his jacket, took off his shoes, and headed right to the couch as if he was welcome here; as if he was still my boyfriend. The most irritating part, was how he patted an open palm on the couch cushion beside him, inviting me to sit down, as if it wasn't my own freaking couch!I took a deep breath to push back my irritation before wandering into the living room. Instead of sitting beside him though, I perched awkwardly on the arm of the couch on the way opposite side, plopping my fluffy, bunny-slipper, feet right onto the cushion. I crossed my hands over my chest as I waited for him to say something. There was an awkward moment of silence as we just stared at each other. Normally, I would have swooned at that look. The one he was giving me right now used to be one of my favorites. That was one of my favorite things about David. When he looked at me, he made m
Toxic Paradise 66| Alec (pt. 2)
Alec’s POV:I relayed my entire story, the way I had when I was with Jayna that night in her bed. If I was being honest- it was a lot easier to tell Jayna than it was for me to tell my story right now. Telling Ryan was brutal; he listened, but I could see the hurt on his face. He felt betrayed by our parents—his dad in particular. I never wanted to hurt Ryan- that’s why I had hid everything from him all these years. "Wow... for once I honestly don't know what to say," Ryan finally replied."I told you. This is why I didn't want to say anything. You work with your dad. The two of you have been close your entire life, and I don't want to get in the way of that,” I explained, leaning back in my chair as if a heavy weight had just been lifted from my shoulders. "Yeah... I'm not gonna lie, it hurts to realize that the man you've looked up to your entire life is nothing but a giant asshole. But... I'm also pissed as hell that you felt you couldn't tell me this before!" "I..." I tried to
Toxic Paradise 65| Alec (pt. 1)
Alec's POV:"Fucking idiots," I thought as I had to tell my co-worker that his microphone was muted for the 10th time today.In his defense, everything had been pissing me off lately. I had gotten home over a week ago and still, Jayna was on my mind constantly. It was irritating as hell. I couldn't stop thinking about her scent, the feel of her small body safe in my arms, and the crazy thoughts that came out of her mouth. I tried everything to move on, and I thought it would be easy, but it hasn't been. I was even having trouble with sex... and I never had trouble with sex. I had tried multiple times and with several women, but I just couldn't get turned on. Even some of my regular hook-ups just weren't doing it for me any more; not unless I pretended they were Jayna.And it pissed me off. I knew she was probably back with her ex...whatever the fuck his name was...Dean? Derek? Dipshit? I supposed it didn't really matter. What mattered was that he probably had his undeserving hands
Toxic Paradise 64| Alone Together
I cried the rest of the night. As I packed the rest my stuff, the vacation house felt so different. It didn't have the inviting warmth and fun atmosphere that it had when Ryan was here; or the intimacy that I felt here alone with Alec. It just felt cold, empty, and impersonal.I couldn't believe that after all of this, after everything that has happened, I was leaving paradise feeling more broken and humiliated than when I arrived. It was a long, depressing flight back, but I finally made my way up the stairs and back to my familiar apartment. It's crazy how living in Chicago, you could be surrounded by tons of people, yet feel so incredibly alone. That's how I felt. Completely alone... again. I wheeled my suitcase through my apartment, which Maddie had been taking care of for me, so it actually was clean and warm when I arrived. I stopped for a minute to look out at the Chicago skyline, taking a deep breath before heading into my bedroom. I left my suitcase in the corner and out
Toxic Paradise 63| Text From the Ex (pt. 2)
Dinner was phenomenal. I'm talking 3 course, fancy drinks, beautiful presentation... phenomenal. At this point, I'd say the only downfall was that it's impossible to feel sexy with a literal food baby. I named him Trevor. Alec and I were in his bed now, my head laying on his warm chest while his hand lazily brushed the bare skin on my arm. "I don't want you to leave tomorrow," he said, breaking the silence."I know," I let out a sigh. "I don't want to go home tomorrow either, but I need to. It's time I get my life back on track." He smiled, placing a soft kiss on my forehead. "As long as I get to be a part of that life from now on." I sat up, leaning down to plant another kiss on his full lips. "Well, that's a given." I placed a palm on his chest, pushing myself up and off the bed. "I'll be back. I need to pee." He chuckled. "So ladylike you are." I took my time in the bathroom, trying to make up for my food baby by finger combing my hair and applying some of Alec's chapstick.
Toxic Paradise 62| Text From the Ex (pt. 1)
The days following our little road trip were great, and dare I say, some of the best days of my life. We had returned back to the house the next day, and our days had been full of beach time, swimming, and napping, followed by nights of hot tubbing, dining, and snuggling. Oh... and of course the sex. The mind blowing sex was definitely a huge part of our time together. Despite everything negative that Alec and done and said to me back when we were feuding, he really was sweet now. He always put me first, and I could feel myself slowly chipping away at the walls he had built up over the years. Each night we spent together, he revealed more and more of himself, and really, I couldn't ask for more than that. He was trying, and I could see the efforts. It even seemed like Alec was coming around to the idea of a relationship. I didn't want to get ahead of myself, but the way things were going with us, I couldn't help but see a future with him. Albeit a way different future than the one I
