1| Too little, yet too late

~Zia~

I’ve heard people say, that your life flashes in front of your eyes, just before you die. But why is mine so… empty and…bleak?

~

I was twenty when I met Damien Martinelli, the love of my life. Twenty-one, when I chose to spend the rest of my life with him, and exactly Twenty-three, when I found out…

I was pregnant.

Like every naive, young girl, in love, I fell hopelessly in love with Damien at first sight. I’d bumped into him at a coffee shop, which coincidentally nestled at a corner between the brick walls of my academy’s building and Damien’s top entertainment company where he worked as a branch manager.

He was a walking Greek god, handsome, with brown amorous eyes, a freaking hot smile, and regrettably, a man with a long line of female admirers.

After a month of stalking his social media handles, and loving him in secret, I finally struck gold when my best friend and confidant, Kate invited a friend of his to a party and Damien tagged along, unaware.

“Zia.”

He had called my name when Kate introduced us. His feathery, deep voice doing a million wonders in my belly.

…and from that moment forward, every other thing that followed had been caught up in a whirlwind.

I knew everything about Damien.

I knew he loved his coffee with a lot of cream. I knew his father’s death when he was a child had dumped a load of responsibilities on his shoulders, forcing him to grow up. I knew of the love he had for his family and how hard he worked to be the best at work.

But, I also knew Damien didn't know anything about me except… I was his good luck charm.

The girl who entered his life and everything got better.

Two months after we started dating, Damien became the CEO of his company.

Five months later,

I became Mrs. Martinelli.

Damien had insisted that I put school aside briefly and move into the mansion where he lived with his mother.

But I must have run out of luck the moment I stepped into the Martinelli home.

My mother-in-law, Charlotte, had not hidden her disappointment with Damien’s marriage to me, a nobody, and together with Damien’s only sibling, Lizzy, they proceeded to make my home… a living hell.

Charlotte immediately advised that we put off trying for kids right away.

“It would be a huge load on Damien. The company has just been placed in his care. You wouldn't want to jeopardize that now dear, would you?.”

I’d looked at my husband, who smiled and squeezed my shoulder lightly like it was the most natural thing in the world. I’d expected him to tell his mother how much I loved kids and his job. That it wouldn't be any trouble to take care of them on my own.

“Mom is right, Zia. Let's listen to the voice of reason.”

Voice of reason!

My mouth parted, but no words came out.

My relationship with Charlotte was already strained from the start and I did not intend to make it worse by bantering words with her.

Perhaps, It was then I realized who the decision-maker in the family was.

First, Charlotte assigned me menial tasks, even though we had a handful of household staff to cater to them.

“Will take your mind off the children..” She’d insisted.

Then, she moved my stuff away from the room I shared with Damien, into the attic room.

“Helps better if you both sleep separately. No room for ideas.”

My contraceptive measures and sexual schedule were overtaken by her. My chores gradually moved from overseeing the house duties to individual tasks like sorting out her laundry, picking up Lizzy’s orders from the mall, and waking up at 5 AM to prepare separate breakfasts for the family members.

Three years down the line, I knew something in me had broken.

The company was doing so well, yet Charlotte’s stand on having children continued.

I was the only married woman, whose mother-in-law had deemed unfit to bear her grandchild.

In all these, Damien followed his mother’s decisions blindly.

Our bedroom meetings slowly declined, until two weeks ago, when Damien chose the one day of the month, when I was off the contraceptive ring to saunter into my room, drunk, wasted, and horny.

~

7 AM, two hours before the blackout.

Zia Hidalgo sank her teeth into the soft flesh of her palm. Biting as hard as she could to muffle the scream that threatened to wake up the rest of the household.

Her bareback was resting on the cold wall, her long black hair muddled up in sweats that had come from God knows where.

In her free, shivering right hand, the result of the test kit remained unmistakably bold.

Two red lines. Pregnant.

“How can it be…” She muttered, her eyes widening and contracting in fast bolts of shock and wonderment.

“Mrs. Martenelli?”

A sudden rap on the bedroom door made Zia toss the test kit beneath the mattress on instinct. Just as she stood to her feet, an impatient voice called out, with a round-faced woman showing her head in the doorway.

“It's time to serve breakfast ma’am. We covered up for you by preparing the meals but… You are already late.”

Zia nodded slowly, knowing her sudden discovery had taken most of her time.

As the wife of Damien, Charlotte had mandated that she prepare and serve their meal every morning and stand by the corner as they ate each meal she prepared. “I will be there soon..”

The maid shifted on her feet, her mouth opening and closing as if wanting to say something. On a final note, she turned around and left.

Zia, however, was too nervous about her current situation to take note of the maid’s action.

As the door closed, Zia’s reflection in front of the mirror brought her steps to an abrupt halt. Her face was pale and her lips dry and charred. She had been crying since she found out she was carrying a child inside of her, so her eyes were quite swollen as well.

She sighed and went into the bathroom, then hastily fetched her usual outfit from the single wardrobe in the small room, a plain black dress with little white buttons forming a straight line in the middle. The collar of the dress was starting to turn white from frequent use and washing but she didn't mind.

Zia licked her lips nervously as she descended the stairs that led to the family’s large dining room. Her hair had been packed into a tight bun to prevent it from straying while she served the meal, but her heart raced from worry about how Madam Charlotte would take her late appearance.

Zia turned the doorknob and suddenly froze in her spot, not believing the sight before her.