"I Love You But I Hate You More" Life has a way of giving second chances, but not all love stories are meant to be rewritten. When Rena and Yoké are given the opportunity to rekindle their once-passionate relationship, they must confront the harsh reality of their differences. Worlds apart in class, race, and background, their love is put to the ultimate test. As they navigate a storm of emotions, old wounds, and family expectations, Rena and Yoké must decide if they can truly overcome the barriers that divide them. Love may transcend all, they say, but what happens when the price of that love is losing everything you hold dear? In a world where loyalty to family clashes with the heart’s desires, the ultimate question remains: stay true to each other, or sacrifice their love for the sake of everything else? ★Comes after 'Till Worlds Do Us Part'
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“I’ve noticed your improvement over these couple of months. And you’ve been saying that you feel ready to stop. Well, I agree with you, you’ve made so much progress. I've spoken to your father, and he said that on your last day of therapy I should get your opinion on how much your feelings has changed about certain people now. Do you mind?”
I sat up on the whirl chair and placed my arms on the armrest. “Of cause not.”
“And he said that we should have it all on camera because he wants to watch it. Is that okay with you?”
I shrugged. “Why not?”
Lauren set the camera up on the little round table next to her sofa and positioned it properly. I was sitting opposite her. Her office was spacious, and the furniture always looked spotless. Her carpet, not a speck, always looked vacuumed. Her vases and coffee table sparkled, never a speck of dust. Even her fake plants were always shining and looked lively, as if they were watered every morning. The temperature in her room was always cool, never too warm, never too cold. And her? She was like a reporter from TV, always looked neat and put together.
“Can we start?” She asked me, giving me a smile.
I nodded.
“The first person your father wanted to know how much your feelings have changed towards is your mother, Leticia.”
I smiled, seeing my mother’s beautiful face pop up in my mind. Her perfect blonde and curly hair styled up on the top of her head with perfect twirls hanging on the sides of her face, not a strand out of place. Her deep blue eyes glimmering as she smiled. “She has a beautiful heart. She is very sweet and very gentle. She has been very supportive and understanding towards me through this difficult time. Even at times when it was obvious on the faces of others that they were fed up with me, she was always genuine and supportive. I don’t know what I would do without her. So, yeah… I appreciate her so much. I wouldn’t trade her for the world.”
Lauren smiled. Her smile was very professional, and she never smiled too much or too little. It always looked genuine and organized. Her neatness sometimes dazzled me, even her hair seemed to have a glow to it. I’ve always imagined that if I had to run my finger down her scalp it would squeak! “And your father, Raphael?” Her voice suddenly brought me back to the room.
“He’s my favourite.” I said, a huge grin stealing over my face. “The alpha. He doesn’t only run our business, he runs the entire city. He has so much influence over everyone else, it’s amazing. It’s not only because he is the most affluential business man in this city. It’s because dominance is written all over him. When he walks into a room, you immediately feel the power that he walks in with and I’m not talking about those two big body guards who follow him everywhere.”
I laughed, Lauren joined too. We shared a brief laugh. “When he speaks, he speaks with authority. But underneath all that power and authority, my father is a good man, a family man. He loves his wife and children and wants what’s best for us and our company. I think that’s what I love the most about him. He is selfless.”
“And of cause, your younger sister, Alice?”
Alice had my mom’s curly blonde hair and father’s hazel brown eyes. She preferred black hair, so she dyed her hair black a couple of years ago. She was lucky enough to have my mom’s natural curly hair while I had my dad’s brown straight hair. I’ve always preferred my mom’s blonde hair and that’s why I dyed my hair blonde, but the natural brown colour was already coming up at the roots.
“Alice doesn’t really talk much… about things, I mean…” I wasn’t about to expose Alice. My father had warned me about it. It didn’t matter whether Lauren was my therapist or not, what happens in our house stays there. “She’s mostly on her own painting or practicing music. She doesn’t let anyone too close to her. Although she doesn’t directly say it but I always feel like she has an invisible dome around her, keeping everyone out and I think that's perfectly normal for someone her age.”
“You two are only 2 years apart. She’s 21. Seeing that she’s your only sibling, people would expect you two to be closer. However, the media labels her as the black sheep of the Roseburg family. In family interviews she doesn’t really look as together as you four, why is that?”
Now Lauren was also sounding like the nosy reporters. That was one thing they all seemed to want to know, why Alice doesn’t look as happy as we do.
“I don’t think that she’s the black sheep of our family. She just isolates herself because she wants something way different from that which our company has to offer but she has to be supportive towards the family business, of course. I can understand it. Seeing that I was once a teacher too and my father wasn’t that much happy with it.”
My father wasn’t happy with it at all.
“But now you’re working at your father’s company as a manager of the labour department and helping the empire grow everyday by recruiting the best people. How do you feel about that?”
“Well, you know that I’ve only been working there for a few months now, four months, but with all the help I’m getting from Francis I’m learning every day and yeah, I’m getting better.”
“Speaking of him, your cousin, Francis. How do you feel about him now?”
“Francis is very helpful, he is more like a brother to me. He is actually very different from the person I first met at the village.” I thought for a while and then nodded. “Yeah, I can say today that he is actually an amazing person. He is funny, sarcastic and just has a bright personality.”
“Speaking about the village, well, the man, how do you feel about him now?”
I crossed my leg over the other and leaned my weight on one side of the armrest. I saw Yoké’s face in my head. I saw him smile at me the first time he did. I saw him take my hand and smile as we walked in the dark. I saw him laugh and throw his head back. I saw him go on his knee, touch my tummy and then look up at me and smile.
“Genesis?” Lauren called.
I shrugged away those memories and shifted in my chair. “Like you tell me all the time, I think of him like a dream I once had and woke up from. All the ‘love’, the moments and whatever happened, that was all part of the dream. But in this real world that I’m living in: Yoké doesn’t exist.”
Lauren looked satisfied. Her hard work finally paid off she must be thinking since the very reason of me beginning therapy was to get over the Yoké issue and well… the baby one too.
“Amongst the people your father wanted me to ask you about. He also mentioned… the baby…”
I got up and walked to the window and stood there for a while. I could feel Lauren standing a little distance away from me.
The road was busy, filled with pedestrians and cars that were rushing to be at some place at a certain time. Across the road, parked, I could see my ride waiting. A black SUV.
“The baby… I will never forget. The 9 months I carried her in my womb was enough for our bond to last a life time. As you know, my baby was my only reason to continue living after I was brought back to Duran. But I was not fortunate enough to hold her in my hands even for a second. I still wonder until today, were her eyes hazel brown like mine or were they black like her father’s?” Tears not given permission escaped my eyes, and I wiped them off quickly and then continued with a sturdy voice. “She was the only reason why I agreed to forget about Yoké and everything I knew. She was my only reason to start over. I will never be able to forget about her. I could never. So no, my feelings has not changed, concerning her.”
“I totally understand how you feel, and I don’t suppose your father expects you to just forget about her. Especially that she is your first.”
“I suppose so too.” I crossed my arms and leaned against the window pane.
“Last but definitely not least, your fiancée Nathan.”
I smiled. “Nathan, also my father’s best friend’s son.”
Lauren chuckled.
“I know everyone thinks we are only together because our parents are best friends but it’s more than that. He is my strong bone. He is always there for me. He is so patient with me. He is so blameless and will stop at nothing to make me feel better and be better. I appreciate him in my life. A lot.”
“Have you learnt to love him again like before?”
I looked out of the window, and I could see him in the back seat of my ride reading a newspaper.
“What is love to you, Lauren?” I turned to her. She had the camera in her hands.
“Well, love is a mystery…” She responded. “It’s complex. It’s more of a feeling and not something you can really explain. But if you love someone, you develop a sense of closeness to the person. They become your safe space, your light when everything seems dull.”
I remember feeling that way for Yoké, but I didn’t think that’s how I feel for Nathan. But that’s not what my father would want to hear after 4 months of therapy. Right?
“I guess I have learnt to love him again.” I told her.
“More than you loved that man?”
I looked into the camera and prepared to lie to my father.
“Yes. More than I loved Yoké.”
"We have nothing left because of him." Dad said, staring at the ground. "I can't believe I trusted him that much.""Who is it, dad?" I asked."None other than your very own half brother, slash cousin, slash no relation at all, Francis.""What?" I asked. "What is he looking for? He wants to make money out of Toko Village meanwhile he is stealing from us and still gets a basic salary on top of that. How can someone love money this much? So much that you'd steal from your own..."Alice and Yoké joined us, they had heard the news too."I knew that that sneaky guy was dodgy." Alice said as she stopped behind the couch Delilah was sitting on and leaned on it.
Uma was awake, and as soon as we entered his ward and he saw us, he smiled, looked away and began sobbing. He covered his hand over his eyes and sobbed. "Aww." We chorused in unison, as if we had planned to. "Don't cry babe." He's girlfriend, Esther said, quickly walk-runned to him. She sat on the side of his bed and hugged him. She hugged him for a while as he continued crying. "We are here..." She told him, she looked sad too. "We love you and we'll always be here for you." Yoké stood behind next to his bed, the opposit side to where Esther was and placed his hands on the cotside. I came over to her side and she stood up to let
I stopped at the door way before entering the living room. He was in a navy blue suit, standing next to the couch, instead of sitting. Rosalie had just brought him his drink. He briefly pointed towards the table where she was supposed to place his drink. I went to sit on the couch opposite the one dad was standing next to. Yoké stayed at the room door post and leaned against it.Dad paced to and fro and stopped where he had started."So we've lost more than half of our clients..." Dad said, voice still powerful although the sad message.I kept quiet and watched him."We've lost most of our projects we were busy with, the clients asked to cancel their contracts or else they'd take us to court. Most of our employees, has resigned because they see the downfall. They know that we won't be able to pay them. Only the loyal ones remain."He then shrugged. "Maybe they're not even loyal. Maybe they are just
We stopped a block away from the motel just incase there were people put in place by Nathan to watch Yoké. But we could see the motel from here. It was a cheap old building. So cheap that the light of the ‘M’ in ‘Motel was flickering so bad that you’d think it would just die any moment. “So what will happen is you’ll give me Nathan’s phone so that when I get in, I can ask him which room number he is at.” The woman half turned to talk to me.“But I’m going in with you.” I told her.She shook her head. “I may not have been entirely loyal to your father but I’m not bad enough of a worker to put your life in potential danger.”“What do you mean danger? I’m—”“I have a gun. Although I’m going in there alone, I know how to defend myself up to a certain point. We don’t know whether Nathan’s men are in there, or around here, in some building, possibly watching us right now. What happens if they fire at us?”“They’ll never fire at me—”“You d
"Yoké...""Gen— Genesis is that— oh my, are you okay?”“I’m fine Yoké. I’m fine.”“What— how did you— Did Nathan put you on the phone with me?”“No Yoké. You don’t ever have to worry about Nathan ever again. He’s in custody…”“Nathan is in custody?”“He’s gone. He’ll never stand between us again. It’s all good now.”“No, no, no Geny. You don’t know Nathan, he’ll never be ‘gone’. You have to hang up right now and never call this number again.”“I’m telling you, my love. It’s over for him. The police have him and my dad knows about him—”“Look Nathan can’t be in custody. We have a— Look, I’m sorry Geny but you and I can’t ever be together. It will never work. Just p
I slammed the car door and fell back on the back seat. The woman, who was supposed to shut the already shut door for me gave me an unbelievable look and then got into the driver's seat."So what happened to your twin? Isn't he going to come with us?" I asked, bitterly."I understand you're upset that your father won't help you with your boyfriend but you don't have to take it out on me, or the car door." She told me looking back at me.We maintained eye contact for a while until she turned back and fastened her seat belt. She started the car and we were on the road again after a few minutes.I was too angry to care about how much this woman was looking at me in the rear view mirror."What?" I suddenly asked after a while of more rear view eye contact.She suddenly stopped the car causing me to fall forward and hit against her seat."Hey!" I shouted as I sat back in my seat. "Are you crazy?""Look, I'm not sure whether or not Mr
“Come here, my love.” Nathan told me. “Come take a seat next to me.”“I don’t want to sit next to you.” I told him. “I want you to tell me which plane Yoké is planning to take and when.”“Gen, your dad will always choose me over Dan. Look, all this is a misunderstanding. Once I speak to him things can go back to the way they were. We could still get married and what happens today would never come to light. We’d still be the world’s favorite couple.”I didn’t even know what to say to him. “Are you crazy?” Those were the only words that could leave my mouth.“I’m crazy about you, yes. My fiancée.”“Nathan, tell me which plane Yoké is planning to take. Please.”“Why do you need him when I’m here?” He asked me.Just then, two cops walked in."Is he ready for us now?" One asked."Yes, sir." One of the nurses answered."Okay." The policeman said and began unlocking the cuff on Nathan's arm to the bed.
When they got out of the car and came to open the door for me, I didn’t even try to fight them off, what was the use? No matter how much I would try, they’d still have the upper hand. And besides even if I manage to get away, how do I get home without a cellphone or money? There hasn’t been a building in sight since we’ve hit the road.“I’ll walk myself.” I told them as they opened the door for me.They exchanged looks. What was it with these two and looking at each other as if they could pass little messages with just one glance?“Look, if you try to run, we won’t go after you,” The male officer told me. “The distance back is not walkable, you’ll starve out there and die and then your family will never hear of you again. So don’t try anything stupid, okay?”I didn’t respond.“You have a better chance of surviving this than running away.” The lady
When I got back to my senses, my first instinct was to unlock the doors and get as far away as I could from this car and Nathan. Nathan was still crying out in agony, trying to ease his pain by clutching onto his wrist with the unharmed hand. I reached out and pressed the unlock button on the stirring wheel. He didn’t try to stop me, just continuing yelling in pain. I opened the door on my side. As I was about to step out, I remembered, Nathan was our only way to getting Rissa back. I reached into his suit pocket where I had seen him put his phone back after the call with one of his men.“What are you doing, Genesis?” He asked me but did not try to fight me off. “Help me.”I began searching the pockets of his jacket for the phone.“Help me, Genesis.” He said again, looking at me helplessly as I searched his pockets. “I love you.”“Freeze!” I looked up to see a policemen on Nathan’s si
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