I will gladly take up the argument that two weeks during school session and two weeks during holidays are not the same.
The way time went(quite an understatement)...spinned (now we're talking) off fast baffled me.
I watch the seconds-hand move, reassuring myself that we weren't in "Spy Kids: All the Time in World" situation--you know, sci-fi has a knuckle for coming true sometimes, like that of Teleportation did, It is now a possible way of transportation developed by Elon Musk.
Though it's not yet available for public use, Elon Musk Group of Companies are on a contract funded by the United Nations, to install the "transport tube" at least two par street in every country of the world. The transport tube through a mechanised process of cell division brings the body to the lowest unit of life; that is "cells" and then through a process called "hyperventilation", morphs back the cells together in the another tube in an area of choice. I heard the project is costing trillions of dollars,I just hope Nigeria gets theirs when others do. I'm tired of Lagos traffic.
P.S: I didn't say I was writing a sci-fi. if you believed that, I would highly recommend you enter the movie industry, your kind is on high demand there...thank you very much.
However, the two weeks was spent playing chess with myself(since my dad who is the only one that appreciates chess like I do was not around) and chit-chatting with the ever arguing Mr. James and Jones( I must really confess, their arguments are interestingly captivating, that really prompted a new philosophy; "you can never can tell how fun you are, until your mind shows you") and part of the time also with Temi, who teased me all way through.
Sometimes she would be like;
"Do you remember that smile of hers?"She would use her elbows to create a support for her chin immediately after saying that--like she does that every time with the Joker's kind of smile stuck on her face.
I'll narrate one of the daily squabbles, banters and all that we(my imaginary friends and I) had within the two weeks of holidays.
It was about a question I popped up and consulted them for help with a solution, only for them to come up and argue tirelessly like co-wives.
"No...no...no..no, it's not necessary", Mr. James with a poise of confidence.
"Give the boy a break, pal. Don't tailor him to be a wimp like you, he gats to take the bull by the horn", Mr. Jones was demonstrating the moves of a bull fighter like that drunk man who bought a conventional toothpick for $1000 on Esbornge Alley(do me a favour...don't bother checking that up).
I couldn't help but chuckle. I decided to consult my imaginary friends on whether it will be advisable to meet Jenny and become friends with her-well...as always, both had different views on the matter.
"I'm not being a wimp, if he meets the girl, that would be selling himself cheap. The girl will count him amongst her numerous admirers and what makes you think the girl will accept him as a friend?. Be rational, bruh", James smirked with disdain.
"You are always full of yourself, you ain't thinking..."
"Enough guys, thanks for being so helpful", I said, stopping Mr. Jones midway, fully intending to sound sarcastic.
Musical Interlude: (plays "Corny" by Gil Joe, dances to the awe of.... himself only)
I know I'm not writing a drama but writer's block can sure do an awful lot...it happens even when you're telling your life story, it can make you do things.
I took me time to figure out the next event to write down...should have owned a dairy if not that it would have added a "lady's badge" to my nerd title already.
The "dam of writer's block" was sure built high enough, locking out the waters of inspiration from flowing. Well, in the end, the dam gats to be blown up, someway...somehow.
I miss those days when my art of writing flowed like an incessant stream of water. Back then in junior secondary, I wrote stuffs a lot; poems, articles and what have you. It helped me a lot though, I "wrote" my way out of trouble. Well, I'll spare you the details of my days of mischief (ermm....mostly because I've forgotten them).
Moving on, two days to departure, I was done with most of the preparation and everything, probably because I got excited about the trip after spending a boring week at home.
I forgot to tell you guys that E-mail was sent to my dad--and oh, remind me never to fill in, my dad's email address as "parents' email" when filling a form.
He "saw" the email three days to the trip. My school was assigned to go to Lekki Conservation Centre. I've heard of the place though I've never been there.
I went into research immediately my dad called and delivered the info to my mom as he was away on a business trip. Lekki Conservation Centre which is found in Lekki, Lagos State, Nigeria is a 78- hectare(190-acre)...(Now, this is what you can browse up on Wikipedia for details, I tend to give too much details which will probably bore most of you, I don't want you burying your handsome dogs next--too much details kills the dog).
Two days to departure, my mom was already giving me safety rules and tips. It got to a point that whenever she wants to start, I would take over from her to tell that I still remember.
Temi came over on the day we were to leave for school coz her parents were busy, which meant that my mom had to take us both. I would have taken a taxi or trekked to school with the luggage and all or better still, rode on the Sultan of Sokoto's horse to school if I knew what was forth coming.
"Honey bunny, hope you've packed in, a toothbrush,you don't want to be using chewing sticks, do you?", Mom asked with all concern, as she was packing in snacks in one of my bags."Yeah, mom...did that like last week, remember?", I looked up and at that instant, she had the same concerned look, Mary, Sheldon's mom from the "Young Sheldon" series would have some times."What of mosquito net, would you be taking that, you know mosquitoes can be very...""Moommm", I grumbled, giving her the "I'm fine" look"it's alright, my baby", she smiled wryly, the smile itself was radiating worry.Mmasi came down from her room in her pyjamas, leaned against the door post of my room."Mom, Dubem is leaving today, right?""Yes, my dear. Will you like to accompany him to school?", mom asked, zipping up the bag she was packing stuffs in, before."Yeah, of course....on the day pigs will fly", she bluntly replied as she turned sluggishly towards the bathroom."...and probably become the George of the Jungle
Fast forward to the bus trip, I had not recovered from the embarrassment, my cheeks were still red. Temi had given up pretense and was releasing muffled laughs, she would look from where she was seating, chuckle and turn back, Jenny did not behave as though a mother petting her 16 years old son in S.S1 was anything related to Old Uncle Weird, she just kept on smiling...as before.The bus lined up like a convoy starting from S.S.3 down to J.S.S.3, with different buses for art and science classes too, our Principal sure spared no expense--well, that's the official version; the unofficial, he's a chronic showoff.All the drivers were maintaining a pace as instructed by the school each filing up behind the other, we were probably gonna contribute a tally to the overwhelming traffic.I was seating at the second to the last seat by the right, particularly by the window side.Since we were assigned seats, Temi go
A SHORT NOTE ON THE TITLE'S MEANINGSome might be confused on what the title means. it's a song title from a Fiji Nigerian musician, Obesere. On the completion of the warning in the song's lyrics, it says "Egungun, be careful, na express you dey go". This simply warns Egungun, the persona(a Yoruba masquerade) in the song to be careful that he's going on an expressway. I guess you can be pretty much figure out the proverbial meaning yourself?ENJOY!!??????????????Dingggg!!!!My heart took on his heels until the arteries and capillaries, he was connected drew him back."What kind of alarm is this!?", I asked furiously to no one in particular, holding my chest as my heart was still pounding. Others in my room woke up too, well...less g
We have established the fact that I barely escaped there-goes-a-nerdy-pervert tag(didn't have the heart to make that, a cliffhanger), now moving back to the morning exercise.It was something I had never experienced. I saw my heart leave me and walk back to the hostel. Coupled with the fact that I was troubled about the event that took place that morning, it was just terrible.We started with running round the upper field five times, it was like a group of people running a marathon. I tried blocking out the thoughts of being jostled and stampeded by people until I turn flat like the cartoon characters, Tom and Jerry when slammed flat by an object or something.No wonder, they asked people if they had any health challenges coz the health challenged had their mild exercising activities going on on the farther end of the field. Before we could finish with that, the sun was already coming up, should be around 5:57am o
*Chyking* is a slang for wooing a lady??????????????After the weekend, the next thing that came up on Monday was the Orientation, where bunch of people with microphones churn out objectives, acknowledgements, dos and don'ts, blah blah blah. The upshot, it's where Boredom hugs people and signs his sleep signature as an autograph on their faces.Looking at us from the top of the school's mega auditorium where we all were sitted, we looked like an army of insects marching to conquer a cube of sugar before the owner of the house sweeps it away.The "good boys and girls" came with pen and jotter to note down things, while some boys were looking for where the pretty girls were sitting.The whole place was up in a cacophony that I could barely hear my thoughts, a very bad place to
??????????????The orientation went by as imagined, "Tourism and it's Upcoming Effect on the Nigerian Economy" and what have you. Celebrity Boredom sure did more than hugging and signing of autographs, he handed out free tickets to his slumber show.The speakers sounded so motivational like that book seller selling books on how to get rich overnight, after which he goes in to take water and hardtack bread. In plain tongue, talking the talking, while the walking was left for "Whom it may Concern".As much as I would love to sleep, I found myself sleep deprived...well that's me, I cannot sleep in public gatherings or anything be it in the class no matter how much I try.Well, what else to do than to jot down things five pages long while I enjoy the drama between Thelma and Hillary. Thelma would poke Hillary and she would turn back to see my reaction, I would just chuckle and watch Hillary whine
I slipped out of my clothes and slipped in, into another. Lying face front, facing the ceiling, I pondered on the call I just had with Temi.Why would Jenny want me to join, we don't talk that much to be regarded as friends-in fact, we barely talked. If she had wanted me to teach her, something like other girls who approach me in order for me to teach them one thing or the another, it won't certainly be during the holidays. So, of what be..."Ooohm!!", Ikem shouted, springing up like an "excited" antelope that just saw a "friendly" lion that wants to exchange pleasantries with him as he punched his bed in frustration, thus interrupting my thoughts."Wetin?", Tunde asked, looking up from the beverage he was drinking."Arsenal don tear my game...1.2 million naira game and that was my last game", he was now sitting back on his bed, going through his phone as though he wanted to check if some miracle had happened.Bouts of laughter erupted from every corner, even Akindele who was watching
So...after the "drama" that occurred on the first day of the tourist outing, I wasn't sure if Temi would still keep up with the plan, which would kinda be a good thing for me if she didn't, funny, right?. I wanted to meet Jenny and at the same time, I didn't want to.The Forest reserve was placed out of bounds except on official outings after the incident, I was pretty sure they won't be smiling and handing out candies to us, if we went here at an unregulated time.Well, the Temi I know can be stubborn, and was she, this time around?, oh...yeah, she was.It was on Saturday, during Games that Temi called me(and if you are asking, I wasn't on any social media platform yet, didn't want to open one yet--social media is a big distraction). She obviously knew I won't be on the field playing.Even in school, during breaks, I preferred staying back to rest and get my brain ready to the next lesson after break or might read a novel. Occasionally, I would go to the Junior Block which is the tall
Sam: We are at the altitude of 100 feets above mean sea level. Prepare for touch down. All seat belts should be tightened.Osmosis: (looks up from the novel, "The Variable Life of Sam" that he's reading and stares blankly at Sam, clears throat, says nothing as he goes back to the book)Sam: Flight 201. Requesting permission for landing. Over.Osmosis: (glares at him, switches on the transistor radio) All alighting at Daviferous Humour Station. We have reached our destination. Remember to take along, your bags and luggage. Thank you for journeying with us.Sam: (alights and stretches himself) Finally, a touch of the open sky. Lemme go have meself, a well deserved meal.Osmosis: (raises an eyebrow) Where do you think you are going to?
A Short Note on the Meaning of "Benefit Boyz""Benefit Boyz" is a trending phrase on social media (as of 2020) in Nigeria. It is used to refer to S.S.3 students who got rich(bought cars and the rest) during the lockdown period and thus, when they resumed school to write their WAEC exams, they became "lords". But well, the reality of this, is largely unconfirmed. Enjoy.???????????????Temi: Mic's on. Hello, guys. Welcome to...Sam: (looks up from the video game that he's playing)Temi, It ain't a video. (more to himself) I wonder how this book would have turned out if I had included your POVs in the main chapters.Temi: I heard that!(waits for him to resume the game. Shakes his arms violently as soon as he doe
Oprah Winfrey once said, "'Great Expectations', a book written by Charles Dickens in all its beauty and my ignorance of the contents therein, forgot the sweet, sensational and great expectation of going home".It was the great day I had waited on from the first week of this tourist programme, the day to finally go home.The departure day was just like arrival. Students were excited and everywhere was busing with activities.A brief "Vote of Thanks" programme was conducted before we were allowed to go. Also, presentation of prizes to their winners.By prizes, they also acknowledged those who pioneered different clubs that night, meaning that Everly got awarded for the pioneering a club and winning the event game."Certificate of Participation" was presented to all those that played in the Hunger Games event.Schools started leaving once the programme was over as they were t
There has been one common theme in the theatrical history from time immemorial; "The Antagonist's Speech".Dr. Thanos Doomsday (Bs.C, Ph.D, Mc.U, Dc.U, An.T) in his famous monologue said and I quote;"What is a villain without his villainous tales?Or an antagonist without his antithesis?For to see a villain is to see a poetBefore his last act of mischief to serve in a trayHis evil masterminded plans to relayTo the awe of the captured protagonistAs he bemoans his clouded perception by the evil mistHave you ever heard of "good mastermind" before?For long have we been margi..."Unfortunately, he was shot three times in the head with a "Stormbreaker M14" by an U.N.N agent(not to be mistaken for a tertiary institution in Nigeria, click 70765 times for disambiguation), Agent Stark before he could finish his monologue. Our condolences go to the family especially his now widowed wife, Mrs. Hela.Coming to us, we blame the antagonists for their foolishness as they waste precious time th
Newton's third law of motion states that "when one body exerts a force on a second body, the second body simultaneously exerts a force equal in magnitude and opposite in direction on the first body".Here in this case, I was the second body. She was the body that exerted the force. Well, as the law states, I exerted a force equal in magnitude which sent her landing to the ground in the opposite direction. Talk about practical science.On a reflex reaction to the announcement, I cocked my gun and had it facing her as she was still on the ground.She squinted her eyes as she lay still with hands raised shielding her face (we had helmets on though) in anticipation of the pellet that would hit her.My heart melted instantly. I couldn't bring myself to shoot her. My years of PUBG failed me there. To further complicate things, I recognised her to be the pretty leader of the psychology club from that night.
Did they save the best for last?, well, they did. As much as I would love to barge into the story, I won't, without our daily dose of creative start--talk of young habits growing grey hairs.Churchill Winston once said, "Life is like a suya. Sweet to the eyes. Sweet on the tongue. It is so sweet that you continue reading this quote without realising that I don't know what in the heavens, a suya is!".Let's go one more, shall we?There are two things that are the heart desires of every Goodnovel reader.The first one is most important, while the second would be considered the less.The first one is the ability to go through chapters without those annoying video ads playing up.You weren't expecting that, were you? But since when did most humans start getting their priorities right?Just kidding, the second is the most important--well, depends on who you ask though, I don't think those that have watched every single "Cinderella Story" movies would agree with me on that.You know what?, w
For today's daily dose of creative start, we will be looking at: "The Writer as a Basketball Player".Without doubt, our daily dose of Creative Start was "inspired" by the great African literary giant, Chinua Achebe's work: "The Novelist as a Teacher".There comes a time in the life of a writer that, that basket-like waste-bin is filled with crumpled papers, each page screaming "writer's block!" as they nosedive their way into the waste-bin--let's all ensure that their life be recycled for...a better nosedive tomorrow, this time screaming "9-years-old-4.5-ft-tall, brown-eyes-coloured-boy's phlegm".I didn't promise to make any sense, did I?. I only said it was "inspired"... Well, we cannot deny the fact that there is a "sense" in "non-SENSE", with that, we will quadratically simplify to bring out the "sense" in the "nonsense"I, as a writer was at that point. Well, though pages weren't screaming their way into the waste-bin, a blank space had been staring at me dejectedly as I type and
There are as many philosophies in life as there are jellof rice in a Nigerian wedding party. Two of these philosophies have always intrigued me. One being the "Philosophies of Reviews". E. Thade once said, "Reviews are like the mirror that reflects our true self. A man that cannot do his reviews cannot fend for his family".Don't think too much about it, it isn't as "awesome" as you think. Just meet that weirdo guy in that Wattpad book club of yours that is hammering on doing your reviews like...like that carpenter that lives on Drury Lane.The second being the "Philosophy of Creative Start". Speaking on that, Euphrates said, "A dive into the actual contents of a work without beating around the bush, not considering whether the bush is a different one from that to be hunted on, is like taking a bath more than once in a year".You should have pretty much figured out by now that I was just churning out a bunch of nonsense. And yup, that was my own creative start--you can argue that with
The next remarkable event on the list was the night we camped outside under the open sky, that was on the Saturday of the second week.Oh, and for Osmosis, he was now one of our friends. We all(Temi, Jenny, Thelma, Hillary, Lasisi, Osmosis and I) were gang of friends. Temi found it hard to comprehend what happened to Osmosis, but she later came in terms with the change and ooh, some weird stuffs was happening too.Osmosis was crushing on Temi, Temi was crushing on Lasisi, Lasisi was crushing on Jenny, Hillary was crushing on Temi, I too was crushing on Jenny(old news, I know), Jenny was crushing on ...emm...I don't know while Thelma was crushing on me(at least, that's what Hillary keeps saying while Jenny would punch him to that effect). Really weird, huh?Well, that was how we saw things. That aside. To the story of the day, we go.It wasn't really an outdoor camping, it was an activity meant to last from