79

“And what did you do? You hurt me anyway.” Amalia’s eyes were glassy as she glanced away from me. “I want you to end it with her.”

“Then I’ll do it.”

The words hurt me to say. It felt like I was ramming a knife through my chest, but my daughter was the only family I had left. I wasn’t going to alienate her. If breaking up with Gina was what it took to keep my daughter in my life, then that is what I had to do.

“You’re too old for her. What the hell happens when you get even older? Will she spend the last good years of her life changing your diaper?” Tears tracked down Amalia’s cheeks. “And what about you? Are you going to spend the next few years trying to keep up with someone as young and ambitious as Gina?”

As much as I hated to admit it, Amalia was making all the points that had spent the last several weeks circling through my mind. I knew that there was no way I would be able to keep up with Gina forever.

That was supposed to be a problem when we got older.

“Break up with her, Dad. She’ll move on from this and find someone her age. You’ll find someone too.”

I knew what I had to do as Amalia got up and walked out of the kitchen.

It would break my heart to do it, but it was clear that things between Gina and I would only reach a point where breaking up was necessary.

I didn’t want to be another man who held her back like her ex. I wanted to see her get everything that she wanted out of life.

I didn’t want to lose my daughter either.

Though I would suffer, seeing both of them flourish was worth it.

Sighing, I got up from the table and paced around the kitchen. Finally, after a few minutes, I turn the oven off and head to my car.

Gina and I are going to have to have this conversation eventually. So it’s better if I get it over with now.

At least, that’s what I keep telling myself as I drive to her apartment. I drummed my fingers on the wheel, trying to release some of the tension coiling through my body.

As I walked to her door, I reviewed what I would say.

However, when she opened the door and I saw her tear-stained cheeks, everything I thought I would say flew out of my head. All I could do was stare at her.

“So?” Gina asked, her voice breaking slightly as she looked up at me. “Do you think she’s ever going to forgive us?”

“I think she’ll move on in her own time, but you and I need to talk.”

Understanding flashed through her eyes as she held the door open a little wider. I stepped inside, my heart pounding against my ribcage.

“This is the part where you tell me it’s you and not me, right?”

I chuckled slightly, even though I felt like screaming. “Something like that, I guess.”

Gina bit her bottom lip briefly before leading the way to her living room. She curled up in an armchair, leaving me on the couch. I felt a lump rising in my throat as I sat. It threatened to choke me.

“This isn’t what I want to be doing, but my daughter has to come first,” I said. I clasped my hands together to keep them from shaking. “If I thought there was a way to make this work without hurting Amalia more, I would do it.”

“I know.” Gina’s hand drifted down to her stomach. “Did you tell her about the baby?”

There was no way I could look at her as the guilt took hold of me. I shook my head and looked down at the ground.

“I couldn’t. Not with how upset she was.”

Gina gave a sharp intake of breath. “Alright. Well, I don’t know what more there is to say then. I love you, but Amalia must come first for you.”

“I’ll tell her about the baby when right.” I sighed and shook my head. “This never would have worked. You and I are in two very different places in our lives. Both of us need different things, and right now, I don’t feel like I’m in the position to give you what we need.”

“And how do you know that?”

“Because I know you, Gina. You were meant to do great things with your life, and I can’t be the one holding you back from going after what you want. So it’s better this way.”

When I looked up, Gina was wiping away tears. I wanted to go to her and comfort her, but there was nothing I could say would make this moment better for either of us. I had hurt her, and there was no making it better.

We just had to get through the next few minutes, and then she would be free to move on with her life without me holding her back.

That was all that I wanted for her.

“I’m sorry,” I said, my voice barely more than a whisper as my gaze locked with her. The edges of my vision were blurry. “I wish that there was another way, but this is what has to happen. I do love you.”

Gina gave a sharp nod before she got up and walked to the door. She held it open and looked at me.

“I think it’s time that you go now. I need some time alone.”

“Gina, I’m sorry.”

She shrugged as the tears rolled down her cheeks. “I always knew there was a chance this wouldn’t work out. Unfortunately, I must live with that reality now, but it will be easier to handle with you gone.”

“Let me know if you need anything for the baby. We might not be together anymore, but I don’t want to miss out on a minute of the baby’s life.”

“You’re going to miss out on a lot of it. That’s the truth of this mess.” She held the door open a little wider. “I’m going to take next week off, and then I’ll bring you my resignation letter on Monday.”

“What are you talking about?”

I was a little shocked. Not once did I think about her leaving her job. She was too good at her job to abandon it.

“Brandon, do you honestly believe I could still work beside you every day without being miserable?”

“I thought we would figure it out,” I said as I entered the hall.

She shook her head and wiped away another tear. “There’s nothing left to figure out. You’ve made the choices that protect your family, and now I have to make those that protect mine. We can’t fault each other for that.”

Gina closed the door before I could argue with her about what she was doing.

Each step from her apartment felt like another nail being driven into the coffin.

A part of me said I was doing the wrong thing.

However, Gina was right. I had decided to protect my family.

At what cost, though?