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Chapter 6
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2024-10-29 19:42:56A knock strikes my door before the sun has risen. I turn in bed and squeeze my pillow against my chest. The darkness outside of my windows tells me it's far too early to function. I hardly got enough sleep considering the emotional toll that's been dragging me through the mud for longer than I would like. I'm supposed to be long gone by now.
Another knock comes. This time he asks, "Are you awake?"
If I refuse to answer, will he think I'm dead? I turn back over and hike the covers up to my shoulders. After a minute of silence, the door slowly opens behind me. I bite my lip and close my eyes as I feel his gaze settle on me.
"Brigette," he says, "we have to go."
I hold my breath.
"
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I stand stiff as each second feels like an hour. David waits for me to argue back, but I don't know what to say. I have nothing to do but stand here and hope that all the world falls away to finally find peace in nothingness. Then I don't have to be anyone. I'd have no promises to keep, no feelings to ignore, or dreams to conquer. "I know," I breathe. He stares at me as if begging the tears building in my eyes to stay there. "You don't have to, Brigette." "I do. I have to." David shakes his head and moves closer, and on instinct, I quickly move back. "Why do you have to?" "I-I just do. It's late. I have to go back to my, um, the room."
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The sweet smell of cooking blackberries wafts in my face as I stir the fruit over the stove to make jam. Helena places the proofed dough loaf in the oven, and we function seamlessly, chatting through our work. "Do you think they will like jam? I hope they aren't picky." "Children are picky, but they will grow out of it. You know, my daughter was a very picky eater at first, so I would eat the food she feared and act as if it was the most wondrous tasting thing. She would see my reaction and immediately want to taste it. Most of the time, she would act the same way—smiling and sayingyum-my. She was a precious little thing." "I can't wait," I say. Helena comes to my side. "Here, dear. Let me take over. Sit down for a bit, won't you?"
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