SIENNASomehow, his words lifted my heart and the pressure that I thought was suffocating me eased a little. Maybe it was one of the reasons I liked to keep him near. It was probably one of the reasons I had to keep him close regardless. I was really exhausted and suffocated, and I had no idea what to do. What was it that I was supposed to do? My mind traveled over to Benjamin and the argument we had last night, making the anxiety return. I knew eventually I would have to be honest and tell Sylvester about Benjamin. But for now, I was a coward who was content to keep it hidden. I didn’t think that I had developed the courage to talk to him about it yet. And I didn’t even think the time was coming anytime soon. I blinked when he said something I didn't quite catch because my disturbing thoughts had pulled me under again, and all I could think about was how much I wanted to feel sane. I forced myself to revert my attention back to Sylvester. “What is it you were saying?” I asked. “
SIENNA“Like what?” I questioned breathlessly. “Like you'd rather be anywhere but near me and it hurts,” he replied.What hurts is that you are getting married to another woman and I know that I can’t do anything about it, I thought.If Tamara wasn't even a problem, that didn't mean that we were free to be together. There were other problems to solve. Like my father. And then there was Benjamin and even Clara. I wondered if I could beg the universe to give me a break. A really small break. I deserved it. I deserved to be happy, didn't I? I just wanted to be happy. “I always want to be near you,” I told him.It hurt even as I said it but it was nothing but the truth. He deserved to know the truth. I closed my eyes. Somehow, even with my eyes closed, I could sense his proximity. I knew that he was close to me. I could feel him. I could feel his presence. When his hands circled my waist, I was left breathless by the intensity of the shudder that ran down my spine. “Maybe we need a bre
SIENNAI stared at my reflection in the mirror. The red dress clung to me in all the right places and I was certain that I looked gorgeous. I looked really beautiful. I closed my eyes and sighed.My nerves were certainly not calm anymore. I knew that it was only going to be a matter of time before I started panicking again. I convinced myself that there was no way that I was going to this engagement party. I was doing more harm than good to myself and yet here I was because I couldn't do anything else but go. Somehow, I just couldn't let my uncertainty claw at me and stop me from going. My blond hair looked even more blond than usual and my makeup was as minimal as it could get, but the eyeliner made the color of my eyes pop. If anything, I was almost convinced that I looked amazing. Key word. Almost. I closed my eyes and smiled, and at the same time, I was tempted to burst into tears. I wondered if that even made sense. My heart was clenching and unclenching. I didn't know what to
SIENNAHe looked away just as quickly as he glanced at me. “We should get going. You don't want to be late,” he said. I didn't miss the slight spite in his voice. I blinked in surprise when I met Clara in the hallway. Her hair was fluffed up to perfection and the waves cascaded down her back perfectly. The red color of her lipstick brought out the paleness of her complexion. Her strapless cream dress complimented the tone of her skin. I hated to admit it, but she was beautiful. She had always been. “What do you think you're doing?” I asked, raising a brow at her. It was obvious that she was dressed for the occasion. “Don't be silly. I'm going with you guys to Sylvester's party. You didn't take I'd stay home alone, did you?” She smiled sassily and tilted her head to the side slightly, taunting me with her eyes. How she even knew that he was hosting a party today was beyond me, and I couldn't even find the energy to worry about what she might be scheming. I knew the night was alread
SIENNAI tried to keep it together. I really did. But the last thing that sent me over the precipice was when I watched him kiss her on the staircase. They claimed to have nothing going on and yet he fucking kissed her. I watched as Tamara looked at him with love in her eyes. Was it love, adoration, or something else entirely? I couldn't put a name to it. Putting a name to it would make me feel nauseous. But it was too late. I already felt nauseous. My head was already spinning, my wolf was already breaking apart and all I could think of was not cracking into two. I didn’t want to crack open and crumble, shattering in the dark abyss of insanity. Something inside of me was withering, dying, crashing, and burning, and all I could think about was how intense the pain I was feeling was. “You're going to be okay,” I felt the need to tell myself over and over again, but it meant that I was a pathetic liar. I would be lying that any of it made sense. My gaze seemed transfixed on the scene
SIENNA Was this why she was here? Was this why she was talking to me? It was obvious that she was goading me to get a reaction out of me, but no, it wouldn’t happen. That was the last thing that I was ever going to allow her to do. That was the last thing that I was going to allow her to do to me. “You know, I didn't think that you'd have the time to come here, considering the fact that Sylvester is always helping out with your pack. I heard a lot has been going on with your pack lately,” she remarked, tilting her head slightly to the side. This was yet another taunt. It was another subtle jab that was enough to trigger me and make me give in to my murderous intentions. I couldn’t think of anything good when it came to Tamara. I couldn’t think of anything that made me not want to murder her with my bare hands. “Yes. He's been of great assistance,” I said, smiling at her with all my teeth. All of my sharp teeth. “So have the both of you set a date for the wedding? When we spoke th
SIENNA“Don't do this. Don't leave with him,” Sylvester said. I could hear the plea in his voice as his gaze traveled between Benjamin and I. His eyes darkened as they landed on Benjamin. I was convinced that any minute from now, he was going to murder Benjamin. I closed my eyes as the pounding in my head seemed to have gotten even more pronounced. My head was spinning and all I wanted to do was get out of this place.Maybe Clara could find her way home if she was so insistent on staying at this stupid party, anyway. As for me, there was no use in remaining here. This place had nothing to offer me. I had seen enough. More than enough, even, and maybe with time, I would learn to come to terms with the fact that we couldn't be together just like I hoped we would be. “You have to get it together,” I muttered to myself under my breath. “Sienna,” Sylvester called out my name again but this time, I was able to muster the courage not to look at him. I let Benjamin clutch my hand and guid
SIENNAI attempted to snap the door shut but couldn't because of how he immediately stuck his leg in the middle of the door. “Don't say that. You know that's not true,” he said calmly. “But it is,” I argued. “My mother left, Hailey left, he left and now you're doing the same. I don't know why I'm refusing to come to terms with the fact that I'm meant to be alone.” Immediately I said that, I ran my hands over my face and quickly turned away from him. If anything, I even felt angry with myself for letting myself feel this way. For letting my emotions get the better of me. For feeling myself crumbling to pieces. “I'm not going to leave you alone.” I felt him behind me. He was close enough that I could smell him. Somehow, the idea of him being so close was oddly reassuring. I gradually turned to face him. I was scared. Very scared. “I meant it. You're wrong. Yes, I was angry and to be honest, I still am, but that doesn't mean that I'm going to leave you alone,” he said. Somehow, I be