SIENNAMy forehead was beaded with sweat as I took swing after swing at Benjamin which he dodged easily. He refused to retaliate my punches and he was very careful not to hurt me. I couldn’t begin to describe the nostalgia that made my insides flutter. Somehow having Benjamin pin me against the wall effortlessly with my behind pressed into his back made butterflies erupt within the confines of my belly. I told him I didn’t feel the same way for him and then my body was reacting to him in ways that I couldn’t simply understand. I closed my eyes and sighed as I tried to navigate through my feelings. They were so chaotic these days. It was really hard to tell what I was feeling and how I felt it. I could never understand why the hell my body thought that it was a good idea to respond to him in this way. I couldn’t help the rush of heat that burst through him as I felt his hard body against my back. And even if I didn’t want to admit it, he made me feel a certain kind of way that I coul
SIENNA“So what was your reason for avoiding me then?” I asked.I hated that I sounded breathless and I was giving away my anxiety. But with Benjamin it was complicated. I didn't always know what to do. I was always at a loss for the right things to say. “It was all you. I didn't want you to make you feel uncomfortable or make you obligated in any way to put up with me. I also didn't feel want you to feel as if I was pressuring you to do anything you didn't want to do,” he said.All I had done was hurt him and yet here he was being intentional about my feelings and trying not to hurt me. I didn't deserve him. I was aware of it and at the same time, I didn't want him to leave. I wanted him to stay. That was selfish but it was the way that I felt. I didn't want him to leave me. “And yet It felt like it. You steered clear of me for days,” I said. “That doesn't mean that it's because I wanted to. Something happened,” he replied. My brows furrowed almost immediately. Then I watched the
SIENNAThe warm water felt very refreshing against my skin as I showered. I knew the exercise would be enough to occupy my mind to some extent. What I didn't expect was for me to bump into Benjamin. I was anxious, and the burst of heat that I felt against my skin when he touched me made me even more anxious. I told him one thing and then when he touched me, all I wanted to do at that moment was jump his bones. How does that even work? How can it possibly even work? I wondered to myself as I closed my eyes and scoffed in frustration.I knew that a ridiculous amount of time had passed because I ridiculously spent so much in the bathroom. But hiding myself in the bathroom wasn’t going to take away any problems, neither was it going to make me feel better about myself. Somehow, I knew that I would have to leave the safe confines of the bathroom and I would return to my problems eventually, so what was the use of delaying it?My mind returned back to what Benjamin had told me this morning
SIENNAI was barely able to enter the office when he slammed the door closed. I was suddenly reminded of how the feel of his hands against my skin felt like. The feel of his lips against the long expanse of my neck was something I was certain that I would love to remember each day. I closed my eyes and released a long sigh. I hadn't imagined the fact that back in the dining room, he had really wanted to devour me on the spot.Throwing caution to the wind, I leaned forward and captured his lips between mine, my fingers becoming lost in his hair as our lips entwined. My heart raced frantically within the confines of my chest, almost threatening to leap out, possibly even explode. I closed my eyes and sighed. I didn't know whether to call it a sigh of contentment, only that I knew I wouldn't have it any other way if I were to make a choice. I wanted to spend whatever time I had kissing and touching him to my heart's content. He finally pulled away so that I could catch my breath. Even
SIENNAAs much as I wanted to stay with Sylvester and I wanted the moments between us to be at a standstill, I knew that it wasn't possible. When it came to living my life, I had to face reality, no matter how tempting it was to be delusional. I was feeling unwell again and I didn't want anyone to know, so I had to retire to bed early and skip dinner. Not that dinner was something that I wanted to partake in, anyway. My appetite was almost non-existent and I was trying to drift my mind away from the nausea that was suffocating me. I tried to close my eyes to get some sleep but the sleep wasn't coming no matter how much I willed it too. I tossed and turned around on my bed because I was beyond tired and exhausted. And yet as the clock ticked by, it was impossible to drift back into sleep. I adjusted into a sitting position, and I was almost tempted to angrily toss the pillows to the floor. I knew that it would be nothing but a childish behavior and no matter how much I wanted to act
SIENNAMy mind was a chaotic place, full of all the things that I was thinking about. I couldn't help but think about how I badly wanted to act on my desires. Benjamin was still looking at me with a concerned look on his face. His brows furrowed deeply as he scanned my face, trying to look for what it was that I might be hiding from him. My breath caught in my throat when he leaned forward and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. My heart raced frantically within my chest and my breathing was becoming extremely hard that it was beginning to be considered as an exercise. I closed my eyes and sighed. I was currently feeling beyond overwhelmed. “What's bothering you?” he questioned. He moved forward and even in my dimly lit room, it was impossible to miss the worry in his eyes. “Nothing,” I replied, yet it didn't sound as convincing as I would have liked it to be. Like I would have wanted it to be. “You know it's not nothing, and I know it's not nothing. So since we both know you'r
SIENNAMy eyes fluttered open and somehow I wasn't ready to get up from my bed. I was not prepared to get up from my bed at all. I was beyond tired and the warm hand around my waist held me tightly to the bed so it was almost impossible for me to stand up. I couldn’t believe that I had let Benjamin spend the night here. But I knew that I had no one but myself to blame. I had wanted him to stay. I had enjoyed the feel of his hands against my skin, the feel of his lips as he ravished mine as he ravished them, and somehow I couldn’t say that I was ready to let go of the moment. I kept reliving it over and over again. I knew that no matter how hard I might try to forget it, the memory was forever imprinted in my brain, and it would be impossible to forget no matter how I might try to. I released a deep sigh just before I turned to face Benjamin who was still asleep. The feel of his bare body against mine was so warm that it was almost impossible not to run my hands up his skin just to
SIENNAI was lucky that Benjamin didn't get caught leaving my room but even if he did, it would be easy for us to maneuver our way around it, considering the fact that he was always coming to pick me up or deliver important messages, unlike Sylvester who had no business here. So seeing him around my room wouldn’t create a whole bunch of questions that I wouldn't be able to answer and I was sure he wouldn't be able to answer either. I closed my eyes, feeling my nerves at its peak. I thought about what he said, about how I would never want to repeat the moments we created last night. The thing that scared me was that I wished I could tell him how wrong he was. He was wrong because I wanted to repeat every moment. I shouldn't want to but I did, and it was so insane. The intensity of my emotions set me on edge. I didn't even want to think about how I was running out of my mind. I was beyond tired and I felt suffocated in every way. I felt the need to lock myself up in an empty room and s
SIENNAI was beyond overwhelmed and yet I clutched my weapon closed to the side tightly. The muscles in my body were knotted into tension and no matter how tired I was, I couldn't bring myself to stop. One way or another, I needed to find Benjamin. “I can hear your heartbeat from here,'' Sylvester whispered. I could feel his lips against the lobe of my ear. I could see that some of the soldiers were searching in their human forms while some were in their wolf forms. This wasn't the time to be thinking about how he smelled or what his lips against my body was doing to me.My father had decided to stay back home. Apparently, we might have to conduct another search party for Clara. My father had said that she ran to her room when the attack started. The rogues didn't come anywhere near the house so how was it even possible that she would disappear without a trace? I couldn't even make sense of it. “You think they took her?” I blurted out the question that had been on my mind for some
SIENNASylvester and I left the den, ready to confront the return of the rogue attacks on our pack. The air outside crackled with tension, and the scent of anxiety lingered as we approached the site of the disturbance.Drawing near the borders, I observed my father who was encircled by a few pack soldiers. His stern expression betrayed a mix of anger and concern that was apparent in him. The gravity of the situation hung heavily in the air, and I steeled myself for the challenges awaiting us. I saw the force of their destruction up ahead and I crumbled as a wave of despair washed over me. This wasn't supposed to occur if we had been vigilant enough. If I had behaved like a true Alpha was supposed to, these rogues would never have breached our territory. “Sienna, you've got to stay strong. Calm down," Sylvester urged."Easy for you to say; you're not the one whose territory is being destroyed," I snapped, but I regretted my words almost immediately. Swiftly, I apologized, "I'm sorry, I
SIENNAI sighed, realizing that this was the difficult situation I had put myself in "Dad, let me explain. Sylvester—""Explain? Explain why you're associating with a Lycan. Do you know what they're capable of?" His voice grew louder with each word."Dad, Sylvester is not like the others. We've formed a bond. There is a connection between us. He's different," I insisted, the desperation I felt evident in my voice.His eyes flickered between Sylvester and me, and the disapproval he was feeling was quite obvious on his face. "Different? What in the name of the Moon Goddess is he different from all the others? So far he’s the Alpha.” He ran his hands through his hair in frustration. “Sienna, you're risking everything by involving yourself with him."“If you would calm down and let me explain to you, you’ll see how different he is,” I implored him.“Did he hurt you?”As my father continued his stern warnings, Sylvester remained silent, his demeanor composed. He looked so calm. Wasn’t he w
SIENNAThe moon was gradually surrendering its luminous glow to the impending dawn as Sylvester and I lay entwined in the quiet haven of the cottage. My fingers traced idle patterns on his chest, and I could feel the rhythmic beat of his heart beneath my touch. The silence between us held the weight of unspoken words, echoing the complexity of our intertwined destinies. If anything, I was glad and relieved that we had cleared everything between us and that the tensions were all ironed out. And I was calm now.I knew that Tamara held no place in Sylvester's heart. She was inconsequential to him, and she shouldn’t dare overstep. If she did, I was quite capable of meting out the treatment that such intruders deserved. And I was ready to go home. Back to my pack and back to my dad. I was ready to tell my dad about Sylvester. "Sylvester," I whispered, breaking the silence that lingered in the air. He looked down at me, his gaze tender yet guarded."What is it?" His fingers brushed a stra
SIENNA“But if he doesn’t?” he asked softly“I don’t care what he thinks anymore. It’s either you or no one. But you’re never getting married to Taylor or whatever her name is”“Tamara,” he corrected, a teasing grin spreading across his face.“I don’t care what her name is, and I don’t care who she is either. She’s an Alpha’s daughter, but I’m an Alpha. If she crosses my path one more time, she’s gonna know what this Alpha can do,” I said defiantly. His eyes held a mix of admiration and pride. "Damn, you can’t imagine how turned on I am by this.”“W-wh-what?” I blushed, my face getting beet red and hot at the same time.“You want to see?” He smirked. I slapped his arms in embarrassment. “Stop it, love. You can’t say things like that.”“Are you kidding me?” He chuckled. “Stop pretending like you haven’t seen what it looks like.” He raised an eyebrow at me, the mischief glinting in his eyes.“Oh my goodness!” This was so embarrassing “You can beg. I’ll show you if you beg.” He chuckl
SIENNASylvester stood by the counter of the kitchen with a soft smile on his face as he watched me emerge from down the stairs. I wanted to watch him smile this way at me forever but at the same time, I wanted to go away from him because what he did hurt me. I couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions, but at that moment, I chose to focus on the calmness I felt after the bath, which was really nice, by the way. "Feeling better?" he asked, his eyes filled with genuine concern.I nodded, still unable to find the right words to express my gratitude. The clothes he provided may have been a bit oversized, but they carried a comforting warmth that seemed to extend beyond just the fabric. It was his, and wearing whatever was his just gave me this sense of comfort. "I appreciate this," I finally said, my voice a gentle acknowledgment.He nodded in return, his gaze lingering on me. "It's the least I could do,” he said.“Of course.” The air held a fragile tension, a silent acknowledgment of t
SIENNAThese days I had come to the conclusion that maybe the only person that I put into consideration was myself. I felt selfish, I felt blind, and I felt stupid too. I couldn't make it go away. As if he was only just realizing the impact his words had on me, Sylvester crouched down and stared up at me with sad eyes. “Sienna,” he said softly but I wasn't so sure that I had in me to give him a response. “I'm sorry. I really am. I shouldn't have said what I said. I lost control for a moment,” he said as he looked up at me. I wondered how he could bear to look up at me with the affection in his eyes when all I ever did these days was hurt him, and make it more and more obvious how much I resented him. I knew he didn't mean what he said. Yes, but that didn't mean it wasn’t true. Every bit of it was. I closed my eyes for a moment, trying very hard to put my emotions under control, to gain some sort of composure. But for some reason, I couldn't seem to do that. “I'm having a headach
SIENNA“What do you mean you were running out of options?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at him. My hands were starting to become clammy with sweat. I was beginning to become more and more conscious of my panic as I looked at him. So I pressed my finger against my temple just to calm myself down.He dropped the cup of tea against the bedside table as he looked at me. I didn't know what to do. “I just wanted us to be alone. The two of us needed some alone time,” he replied.“What alone time are you talking about? How do you think it's possible that I could stand to be in the same room with you, knowing that you're going to be married in less than a week!” I snapped. I was trying to let the anger and rising panic not take over me. But this was Sylvester I was dealing with. No matter how I tried to escape from my emotions, from my feelings, he sure did have a way of invoking them and they always came rushing back, no matter how much I tried to escape them. “I'm not getting married," Syl
SIENNAI wanted to die rather than feel this pain that was making me suffer. It was happening gradually and that was what I hated about shifting. It was too slow and gradual. “Sienna,” Sylvester called out again as he made his way over to me and crouched down in front of me. His face was contorted in pain, and it was just as if he was going through something similar. I didn’t think it was possible for him to feel whatever I was feeling. It just wasn't possible. I closed my eyes and sighed. Then I started to breathe in and out. I kept breathing in and out again and again. Maybe that was going to help.But I knew that I was deceiving myself. Nothing ever helped when this was happening. All I could hope for, all I could wish for was for the pain to go away. But all I did was internally count as I looked forward to the time that it would be dawn again. “I'm here,” Sylvester said softly. His hands went through my hair in tender soothing motions and I found myself leaning into his touch