SIENNAMy fists ached. I was positive that my knuckles must have been bruised but regardless I still went on punching anyway. Training was the only thing that I ever really did to occupy myself these days. It was a kind of reprieve from the self hatred that I seemed to be drowning in. My chest heaved up and down heavily as I tried to catch my breath. Everything was exhausting and tiring. Dad wouldn't talk to me, Benjamin avoided me like the plague and the only thing that was normal was Clara's occasionally taunting and even at that, she was strangely being nice and accommodating. Maybe she could sense that I was going through more than enough fire now. We held a burial for the people that died. Some of the people in the pack looked at me differently and it was quite impossible to miss the accusation in their eyes. It was almost as if I was a traitor and in a way I was. They needed me and I had left them to fight alone. I had left them to fend for themselves. I wondered how they wou
SIENNAI don't know for how long I must have been asleep. I know that before I slept, I had panicked and I had bursted into tears again. Benjamin had insisted that I rest and I sleep for a while and I insisted that he stayed with me which he conceded too. I watched his sleeping face, I remembered bits and pieces of my mental breakdown before I slept. I couldn't remember what triggered me into panicking but I remember breaking down and Benjamin consoling me through it. As I stared at Benjamin's sleeping face. I was tempted to run my fingers softly against the side of his face. I was taken aback by the desire because I had no idea where it came from. The thought was sudden, unprovoked and I didn't know how I was supposed to react to it. I looked up at the clock and my eyes widened, I had no idea how much time had gone by. I immediately adjusted into a sitting position. I ignored how groggy and tired that I felt. “Are you okay?” Benjamin asked and I snapped my head towards his directio
SIENNAI was conflicted between feeling terrified and feeling calm. I didn’t know which was more cruel. That I would have to face the families who were mourning or I would have to witness the strong resentment that passed through their eyes as they looked at me. I closed my eyes and tried to drift my mind away from the panic that was welling up in my chest. There was certainly no way that I could tell my father no. There was also no way that I could set out to deliver these care packages without panic setting in. “What is it?” he asked and tilted his head slightly as he observed me.No matter how much he didn't like it, he was still the Alpha. He was still my father and I couldn’t deny him of his request. Not that it was even a request. It was more of an order than a request.I wanted to tell him that I wouldn't be able to do it. I wanted to beg him and tell him that he should look for another way to get the care packages. I would be able to take on any care packages but I knew it w
SIENNAMy palms were clammy with sweat as we headed over to from family to family with care packages in hand. I insisted that Benjamin didn't have to follow me to deliver them but he insisted, to my relief, because I wasn't so certain that I could have handled it on my own. Some families were not too receptive towards me. I had the door slammed in my face a couple of times, other times, I had the care packages tossed from my hand with them telling me how much of a disappointment I was to my father, and other times, they were surprisingly kind to me and accepted the care packages with gratitude. Benjamin was by my side through the whole encounter, so it made the entire thing bearable. After a while, I was finally done. I was relieved, the constriction in my chest loosened a little when I realized that it was finally over. “I guess it didn't go so bad,” Benjamin finally said after we delivered the final package, and when I shot him a look, my eyes were full of tears. “They hate me
SIENNA The space surrounding my chest felt lighter, my shoulders felt less heavy as Benjamin pushed me up and down the swing. I giggled like a little girl holding onto the swing tightly. I felt the cool breeze sift through my hair and I felt the soothing breeze hit my face. In a way, I wanted the moment to be perfectly at pause. If I had my way. I'll put it to a standstill so that I could get to experience the moment, every day of my life. I didn't think about how heartbroken I was or how I was still trying to pick up the remaining pieces of my heart. I didn't think about how I had so much work to do, or how I had to work so hard in gaining back the respect of my father and the entire park. I was almost certain that at some point, I had tossed my problems into the wind. I was convinced that I felt lighter, more lighter than I've ever felt. At some point, I told him to stop because I was feeling dizzy and he did what I requested. I looked at him and smiled. My tummy erupted into ti
SIENNA I stared at Benjamin, speechless and unable to utter a word because how the hell was I supposed to tell him that was what I had been doing for the past week? I didn't even remember the last time that I had anything substantial to eat. It was mostly just little bites here and there. Thinking about it. No wonder, I felt dizzy in the training room. Benjamin stared at me aghast, like he was petrified by the thought of me not eating anything. We headed down the hallway, past the living room, towards the direction of my bedroom. “Hold on and give me ten minutes. I'll come see you later,” he said and turned back and disappeared down the hallway without as much as a second glance. My brows furrowed in confusion but I decided that it was a better idea for me not to give any meaning to it. I turned back and walked towards my room. When I entered, I released a relieved sigh. My phone vibrated on the bed and I headed towards it, hoping it would be Hailey. My mood came crashing down en
SIENNABenjamin left earlier than expected. We spent the whole morning talking about the most random things. At the back of my mind. I knew I didn't want him to leave. One way or another. I was getting attached to him more than I would like to admit. I stared at my reflection in the mirror. I wouldn't say that I had returned fully to my old self but the glow was back to my skin and the bags underneath my eyes were gone. I was slowly on the road to becoming my old self again. I guess I had Benjamin to thank for that. I released a sigh and decided that I was going to let my hair down today. I've put it up in a bun for the whole weekI decided to put more effort into the way that I dressed today. I've been dressing like I'm attending a burial for the past week. Today's the first time that I was putting on a little bit of color with my black comfy jeans. If navy blue was even considered a color. Today was the day that I decided to suck it up and have breakfast with my father and Clara. I
SIENNAIt was hard coming to terms with the fact that he was here. Sylvester's eyes showed no atom of emotion whatsoever but I knew that his gaze lingered on me more than necessary. The air in the room was thickening with tension and it was impossible for me to focus on anything else. No matter how much I wanted to convince myself that he didn't affect me as much as he used to. I also knew that I would be lying to myself. He affected me just as much as he did before. I subtly looked around and hoped no one noticed the slight shake of my hand as I raised my cup of tea to my lips. “So tell me. How do you expect to bring back the lives of ten people?” I tilted my head to the side. My tone dripped with nothing but stone cold sarcasm. Perhaps I was to blame during the night of the attack but he was also to blame as well. Our packs were in alliance for a reason and yet he didn't deem it fit to inquire what was happening until a week later. “I'm going to station myself here with my men,”
SIENNAI was beyond overwhelmed and yet I clutched my weapon closed to the side tightly. The muscles in my body were knotted into tension and no matter how tired I was, I couldn't bring myself to stop. One way or another, I needed to find Benjamin. “I can hear your heartbeat from here,'' Sylvester whispered. I could feel his lips against the lobe of my ear. I could see that some of the soldiers were searching in their human forms while some were in their wolf forms. This wasn't the time to be thinking about how he smelled or what his lips against my body was doing to me.My father had decided to stay back home. Apparently, we might have to conduct another search party for Clara. My father had said that she ran to her room when the attack started. The rogues didn't come anywhere near the house so how was it even possible that she would disappear without a trace? I couldn't even make sense of it. “You think they took her?” I blurted out the question that had been on my mind for some
SIENNASylvester and I left the den, ready to confront the return of the rogue attacks on our pack. The air outside crackled with tension, and the scent of anxiety lingered as we approached the site of the disturbance.Drawing near the borders, I observed my father who was encircled by a few pack soldiers. His stern expression betrayed a mix of anger and concern that was apparent in him. The gravity of the situation hung heavily in the air, and I steeled myself for the challenges awaiting us. I saw the force of their destruction up ahead and I crumbled as a wave of despair washed over me. This wasn't supposed to occur if we had been vigilant enough. If I had behaved like a true Alpha was supposed to, these rogues would never have breached our territory. “Sienna, you've got to stay strong. Calm down," Sylvester urged."Easy for you to say; you're not the one whose territory is being destroyed," I snapped, but I regretted my words almost immediately. Swiftly, I apologized, "I'm sorry, I
SIENNAI sighed, realizing that this was the difficult situation I had put myself in "Dad, let me explain. Sylvester—""Explain? Explain why you're associating with a Lycan. Do you know what they're capable of?" His voice grew louder with each word."Dad, Sylvester is not like the others. We've formed a bond. There is a connection between us. He's different," I insisted, the desperation I felt evident in my voice.His eyes flickered between Sylvester and me, and the disapproval he was feeling was quite obvious on his face. "Different? What in the name of the Moon Goddess is he different from all the others? So far he’s the Alpha.” He ran his hands through his hair in frustration. “Sienna, you're risking everything by involving yourself with him."“If you would calm down and let me explain to you, you’ll see how different he is,” I implored him.“Did he hurt you?”As my father continued his stern warnings, Sylvester remained silent, his demeanor composed. He looked so calm. Wasn’t he w
SIENNAThe moon was gradually surrendering its luminous glow to the impending dawn as Sylvester and I lay entwined in the quiet haven of the cottage. My fingers traced idle patterns on his chest, and I could feel the rhythmic beat of his heart beneath my touch. The silence between us held the weight of unspoken words, echoing the complexity of our intertwined destinies. If anything, I was glad and relieved that we had cleared everything between us and that the tensions were all ironed out. And I was calm now.I knew that Tamara held no place in Sylvester's heart. She was inconsequential to him, and she shouldn’t dare overstep. If she did, I was quite capable of meting out the treatment that such intruders deserved. And I was ready to go home. Back to my pack and back to my dad. I was ready to tell my dad about Sylvester. "Sylvester," I whispered, breaking the silence that lingered in the air. He looked down at me, his gaze tender yet guarded."What is it?" His fingers brushed a stra
SIENNA“But if he doesn’t?” he asked softly“I don’t care what he thinks anymore. It’s either you or no one. But you’re never getting married to Taylor or whatever her name is”“Tamara,” he corrected, a teasing grin spreading across his face.“I don’t care what her name is, and I don’t care who she is either. She’s an Alpha’s daughter, but I’m an Alpha. If she crosses my path one more time, she’s gonna know what this Alpha can do,” I said defiantly. His eyes held a mix of admiration and pride. "Damn, you can’t imagine how turned on I am by this.”“W-wh-what?” I blushed, my face getting beet red and hot at the same time.“You want to see?” He smirked. I slapped his arms in embarrassment. “Stop it, love. You can’t say things like that.”“Are you kidding me?” He chuckled. “Stop pretending like you haven’t seen what it looks like.” He raised an eyebrow at me, the mischief glinting in his eyes.“Oh my goodness!” This was so embarrassing “You can beg. I’ll show you if you beg.” He chuckl
SIENNASylvester stood by the counter of the kitchen with a soft smile on his face as he watched me emerge from down the stairs. I wanted to watch him smile this way at me forever but at the same time, I wanted to go away from him because what he did hurt me. I couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions, but at that moment, I chose to focus on the calmness I felt after the bath, which was really nice, by the way. "Feeling better?" he asked, his eyes filled with genuine concern.I nodded, still unable to find the right words to express my gratitude. The clothes he provided may have been a bit oversized, but they carried a comforting warmth that seemed to extend beyond just the fabric. It was his, and wearing whatever was his just gave me this sense of comfort. "I appreciate this," I finally said, my voice a gentle acknowledgment.He nodded in return, his gaze lingering on me. "It's the least I could do,” he said.“Of course.” The air held a fragile tension, a silent acknowledgment of t
SIENNAThese days I had come to the conclusion that maybe the only person that I put into consideration was myself. I felt selfish, I felt blind, and I felt stupid too. I couldn't make it go away. As if he was only just realizing the impact his words had on me, Sylvester crouched down and stared up at me with sad eyes. “Sienna,” he said softly but I wasn't so sure that I had in me to give him a response. “I'm sorry. I really am. I shouldn't have said what I said. I lost control for a moment,” he said as he looked up at me. I wondered how he could bear to look up at me with the affection in his eyes when all I ever did these days was hurt him, and make it more and more obvious how much I resented him. I knew he didn't mean what he said. Yes, but that didn't mean it wasn’t true. Every bit of it was. I closed my eyes for a moment, trying very hard to put my emotions under control, to gain some sort of composure. But for some reason, I couldn't seem to do that. “I'm having a headach
SIENNA“What do you mean you were running out of options?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at him. My hands were starting to become clammy with sweat. I was beginning to become more and more conscious of my panic as I looked at him. So I pressed my finger against my temple just to calm myself down.He dropped the cup of tea against the bedside table as he looked at me. I didn't know what to do. “I just wanted us to be alone. The two of us needed some alone time,” he replied.“What alone time are you talking about? How do you think it's possible that I could stand to be in the same room with you, knowing that you're going to be married in less than a week!” I snapped. I was trying to let the anger and rising panic not take over me. But this was Sylvester I was dealing with. No matter how I tried to escape from my emotions, from my feelings, he sure did have a way of invoking them and they always came rushing back, no matter how much I tried to escape them. “I'm not getting married," Syl
SIENNAI wanted to die rather than feel this pain that was making me suffer. It was happening gradually and that was what I hated about shifting. It was too slow and gradual. “Sienna,” Sylvester called out again as he made his way over to me and crouched down in front of me. His face was contorted in pain, and it was just as if he was going through something similar. I didn’t think it was possible for him to feel whatever I was feeling. It just wasn't possible. I closed my eyes and sighed. Then I started to breathe in and out. I kept breathing in and out again and again. Maybe that was going to help.But I knew that I was deceiving myself. Nothing ever helped when this was happening. All I could hope for, all I could wish for was for the pain to go away. But all I did was internally count as I looked forward to the time that it would be dawn again. “I'm here,” Sylvester said softly. His hands went through my hair in tender soothing motions and I found myself leaning into his touch