Chapter 1

***Trigger Warning - This story deals with child loss ***

My little one has left. I was so lucky to be his mother, yet so tragically only for a month.

I hummed a soft lullaby as I rocked back and forth in the rocking chair while I held the necklace in my hands. This would be the closest I’d ever get to holding my baby ever again. Oh, goddess, why did you give him to me only to take him away so soon?

My fingers brushed over the glass that sealed the ashes of my son, as I stared at the one that contained a small snip of his dark blonde hair. Hair just like his father, Kalen. This damned war! It had taken both of them from me.

Six months ago, out of nowhere, rogues began attacking several packs, including ours. They were slipping past defenses and taking out key strategic spots with astonishing precision. Everywhere they went, towns burned and fields trampled, turning the whole place into a living hell.

“Alyssa, take care of yourself. I will be back soon.” My father kissed me and left to fight.

Yet I wasn’t afraid, despite father being the only family I had left. He has never lost, and he will do the same this time. Just like Kalen, my love. He would be fine. They both would.

Or that’s what I thought. One week passed and then two weeks, then another. Yet, I heard nothing from my father or Kalen. No one seemed to know where they were or what might have happened to them. For the first time, fear crept into my heart. I couldn’t sleep. Sometimes I’d go stand on my porch until sunrise, hoping they would appear in the treeline, but they never did.

I fell ill and everyone assumed it was anxiety until the doctor examined me. Turned out I was three months pregnant. The fear grew, but so did my joy. A child! I was having Kalen’s child.

As Carl was my best friend, I shared the news with him, hoping he could help me contact Kalen. However, he told me Kalen was a rogue, the rogue king’s son! And he was dead…

“Marry me, Alyssa,” Carl said. “You know I love you. Once people find out the baby is a rogue… the pack… they’ll…” his voice drifted off. “I can protect you from now on. Please, Alyssa.”

Kalen never lied to me. He’d never keep something like him being a rogue from me. Even more, he was too strong to have died. No. I refused to believe it. It couldn’t be true. I swiped a tear off my cheek and shook my head. “No, I will wait for him.“

“Why are you still crying over that rogue’s bastard?” a woman’s ridicule came, interrupting my memories.

I’d recognize that venomous voice anywhere. Lena. My husband’s mistress. She was nothing more than a viper with a honied tongue. She fluffed Carl’s ego and told him everything he wanted to hear.

Yes, I married Carl. I never believed what he told me. But the months passed and my belly got bigger day by day. There was no news of my father, and the news of Kalen’s rogue identity spread. The pack began to gossip about my pregnancy and I gradually fell into despair.

I can’t let anyone take the last piece of Kalen I would ever have. So I did what I had to, to protect my child. After Carl promised to protect him again and again, I agreed to marry him. Not that it mattered in the end…

Opening my eyes, I glared at Lena. She leaned on the doorframe, and as much as I hated to admit it, she was a classical beauty with blond hair and pouty lips. Lena would’ve been breathtaking if it wasn’t for the look of superiority in her brown eyes and the nasty smirk on her lips.

With my own venomous tone, I replied, “Only someone who knows nothing of love would ask me something like that.” I put the necklace back around my neck, knowing she wouldn’t leave me alone to grieve.

“Please,” Lena said, rolling her eyes at me. “You’re being weak and pathetic. No wonder Carl doesn’t want you anymore. Actually…” She grinned at me. “Does anyone want you? Your father doesn’t as he’s gone and disappeared. Your rogue lover would rather die in a fight than be here by your side. And well… that bastard…” she laughed, letting me fill in the rest.

“How dare you? I am the luna of this pack! You are nothing but a pastime,” I yelled as I marched up to her. I pulled back my fist and swung at her.

Carl appeared out of nowhere and grabbed my wrist.

“What do you think you’re doing?” He said with an obvious look of disgust. “If you’re so proud of being the luna, how about you act like one, instead of crying for a rogue every day,” he said, pushing me back and away from Lena.

“Exactly,” Lena said, snuggling up to him. “You’re so decisive. Thank god you solved that problem in time for the dignity of the pack.” She turned to look at me with a grin that made my blood turn cold.

“What?” I said, confused. “Carl, what is she talking about?”

“What the hell, I’ve been patient, but you’ve been mopey and sobbing for almost four months now. You’re useless to me like this.” I flinched from the callousness of his words.

“Your bastard would create confusion in the line of succession. A rogue’s brat, the future alpha? No one would stand for it. The other packs would ridicule us. Eventually, one of them would try to take over our pack at best, or worse, the rogue king would think we belonged to him. So I did what needed to be done.”

My heart stopped as I stared at him, eyes wide. “What are you saying, Carl?” Please. Don’t say it… please… it couldn’t be true.

“Really? Are you that stupid, Alyssa? I got rid of that bastard to avoid all those problems, and that the creature was an insult to me. A reminder that you chose a rogue over me! I am the better man! Yet, you chose our enemy, and now you know choices have consequences.”

“We grew up together. We are best friends. Why would you do this? How could you do this to a baby?”

Carl’s expression twisted with anger. “Friends? No, I never wanted to be friends,” he snapped. “I was the beta’s son, strongest of all the other men! I was the best this pack had! When we were old enough to get married, I was going to be the alpha. However, as soon as you saw that rogue in college, you forgot all about me!”

Carl paced back and forth, looking more than a little crazed. “How could you not see what he truly was? He was always showing off to the teachers and other students. He had to be the star of the show, but I know his secret. I know he cheated to get all the accolades, titles, and attention. He’s a rogue for the love of the goddess! A rogue! A rogue could never take what belongs to me!”

I didn’t think my heart could break anymore, but somehow it shattered all over again. I couldn’t breathe, as my chest tightened. My baby. My Caden… Carl… “You promised to protect him,” I said, my voice cracking.

“Yeah, well, you promised to be my wife, but you didn’t even let me touch you on our wedding night!”

Was he serious? This couldn’t be real. “You know we didn’t marry for love. And I was pregnant!”

“Of course,” Carl said, rolling his eyes. “Whatever. Use whatever excuses you want. All that I care about now is that you are useless to me. I’ve got the whole pack. I’m going to make Lena my official luna.”

The shattered pieces of my heart fused together in rage and pounded in my chest. He betrayed me and murdered my son! How could I have been such a fool? How did I not see the monster he was?

“No!” They wouldn’t get away with this. I wouldn’t allow it. “You are not the alpha, and she,” I said, pointing at Lena. “Will never be Luna and you… Carl, your days are numbered. I will tell the elders and the pack what you did, and if they won’t listen, then I’ll go to the lycan king. He’ll punish you for what you’ve done!”

I charged towards the door when Carl shoved me back. “I don’t think so. You’re not telling anyone anything,” he said. With an ice-cold tone and eyes filled with bloody delight, he threw a hard punch to my face.

My vision went white as I fell to the ground. Carl fell on top of me before my vision cleared, but I felt the burn of silver on my wrists. As I screamed, someone grabbed my face and forced a glass tube into my mouth. A bitter tangy liquid scalded my throat on its way down.

Carl got up with a satisfied smirk on his face. “There. Let them hear you talk now.” He laughed cruelly as I pulled on the cuffs. They burned my wrists, but I welcomed the pain. I screamed in fury, however my scream dwindled to a squeak then nothing. No sound came out of my throat, and the smirk on Carl’s face grew.

“Now, we tell the elders we found our traitor.”

I tried to yell and scream, demanding they wouldn’t get away with this, but not a sound came out of my mouth. Whatever they forced me to drink paralyzed my vocal cords.