Chapter 5

Nick POV

          I had booked myself a flight, and a room at a local bed and breakfast in her hometown before going home to my empty condo and packing. My flight would leave late this afternoon and I would make it to Richmond by dusk. The town she lived in was an hour and a half drive from the city, so I would make it there late in the evening. I was a little nervous to see her again after all these years, but the excitement overrode and nervousness I had.

          Joey had come home with me and talked about everything he had learned about my ex-wife from her brother. He talked about the stories her brother had told him about her as a child when they were in college, and about the things he had told Maddie about her life now. He told me about how she had been fearless as a child, which had gained her the title of the family wild child. He also talked about how she had apparently bought a bunch of land with the money I gave her in the divorce. Now she owned a farm on the outside of town, and a restaurant- bar combo on the edge of town.

          Her new husband was her oldest brother’s best friend, who she had apparently known since she was about 10 years old. I had my own issues with that but wouldn’t dare to voice them because I knew it would just make me look jealous of him. Maybe I was, after all, he was living the life that I had wanted to have with her. I wasn’t sure about anything at this point, let alone what I was going to say to her when I finally came face to face with her again, but I would figure it out when it happened. Honestly it didn’t matter what happened while I was there, as long as I got to walk away with some sort of arrangement to be a father to our little girl.

          I got packed up and Josh dropped me off at the airport. The flight was pleasant enough, and the drive wasn’t too bad either. I got to the bed and breakfast late in the evening. While it was already dark, I couldn’t help but to notice how adorable the building was, located in the middle of town directly across from a playground. It was a Victorian style mansion with a large wraparound porch that had been turned into a small bed and breakfast.

          When I walked through the doors, an overhead bell dinged, signaling that someone had entered. I made my way over to the small desk that stood at the bottom of the stairs, and checked my text messages as I waited for someone to come to check me in. A tall, light skinned, mixed girl came out from behind a door and smiled as she welcomed me. She told me her name was Renee as she reached out to shake my hand with a smile. As soon as she smiled I realized that she was one of my ex-wife’s seven siblings. It made sense as her name began with an R too, and there was no denying she had her sister’s smile.

          I introduced myself and she got me checked in as a young, tall, light skinned man, who she introduced as Ricky, came out of the same door to grab my luggage and walk me to my room. I soon realized that Renee was older than her, while Ricky was obviously a younger sibling. Josh had said that though he didn’t remember all their names, he knew they all started with the letter R. He also said that her older brother Ray lived in Washington D.C. I also realized that this bed and breakfast was probably owned by her as well, seeing as how 2 of her siblings were running the place.

          As Ricky walked me to my room, he told me that breakfast was at 8am, lunch at noon, and dinner at 5pm. He also said that a lot of visitors to the area like to visit his sister’s restaurant for dinner because she did a 5pm karaoke dinner show. He told me that the name of the restaurant was named R9 & sat on the southside edge of town. I told him I would be sure to check it out during my stay, and he smiled as he opened my bedroom door and handed me the key, before carrying my luggage inside. He seemed like a nice kid, so I gave him a 10 dollar tip and thanked him before he left the room.

          The room was updated and cozy, with a flat screen tv on the wall and central air & heating in it. The bathroom was updated as well with a nice, large shower instead of the tub you would normally expect to see in a Victorian mansion. I decided to get myself ready for bed so I could get up early and explore this little town. I would try to find my ex-wife, though there was really no telling where I might find her at. I figured if anything I would drive around and try to find her farm, or maybe ask one of the locals, surely they knew of her family, and could lead me in the right direction.

          The next morning I was up by 8am so I wouldn’t miss breakfast. I got myself showered and dressed for the day before heading downstairs to the common areas. I had been wondering around the downstairs, exploring the layout of the building when I finally came across the dining room. There was a large buffet of breakfast foods on the far wall, though there wasn’t anyone in the dining room having breakfast. I decided to grab myself something to eat, so I started making myself a plate of pastries, bacon and some scrambled eggs.

          “Mama say I can have pastry so long as I’m good today Nay-Nay. My Mama say.” A little voice came from behind me as I heard the door on the left wall open.

          “You can have 1 pastry, but you also have to eat some sausage and fruit, deal?” The woman’s voice from last night rang through the room.

          “Yes, and I will be good today Nay-Nay, ok?” The little voice spoke as it made its way over to the buffet table.

          While I didn’t want to get my hopes up, my heart rate spiked as she came closer. My immediate thought was that this little girl might be my daughter, but I knew that Renee had several other siblings as well, so this little girl could be any of theirs.

          “Ok miss Selah, we’ll see about that. It’s still early.” Renee said with a chuckle as they reached the buffet table.

          I turned my head to look down at the sweet little girl, my little girl. Her hair was in a high ponytail of bouncy curls, and she had on white tights with a light pink sweater dress. She had light brown boots on to keep her feet warm, the perfect autumn ensemble, just like her mother used to wear during the fall months. She watched as Renee made her plate of food, picking out her pastry and the fruit she that she wanted to eat. As I finished scooping scrambled eggs on my plate she made a gagging noise next to me.

          “Selah stop it.” Renee scolded her.

          “Its not my fault, eggs are yucky, they smell so bad.” My little girl said before scrunching her face up.

          I turned to face her with a smile, and she gasped when she saw my face. When I saw her reaction I wondered if her mom had shown her pictures of me. She backed into Renee’s legs and giggled softly as she buried her face into Renee’s skirt, hiding from me. I could tell just by the way she was acting that she knew exactly who I was, and I was thankful that her mom had at least told her about me and showed her pictures. She peaked from Renee’s skirt, and I smiled at her as she pretended to be shy.

          “I’m so sorry. My little sister has a bunch of meetings today and school is closed because it’s election day, so I told her I would keep her daughter. This is Miss Selah, by the way. I’m not sure why she’s acting so shy because she’s not, at all. Gets that from her mother.” Renee told me with a laugh as she pulled Selah from her legs.

          “Selah, stop acting shy and say hi to Mister Nick.” Renee told her as she struggled to pull her from around her skirt with just one free arm.

          “Is not Misser Nick. Is Selah’s daddy wift Selah same eyes.” My little girl told her as she peaked at me from where she had hidden behind Renee.

          I chuckled at her revelation, knowing that she was right. Renee’s eyes grew wide as a blush starting creeping up her neck. She obviously had no idea who I was, so she didn’t know that Selah was correct in calling me her father. She mumbled out an embarrassed apology before dragging Selah to a table to eat her breakfast. I sat down at a table in the room as well and pretended to scroll through my phone as I ate my breakfast as well. I would occasionally look up at Selah and smile as she watched me from where she sat. Renee kept telling her to stop staring at me, but I laughed and insisted that it was fine whenever she said it.

          I finished my breakfast knowing that my plans for the day had changed the moment my little girl walked through the door of this bed & breakfast. I had intended to explore this little town, but now I found myself looking through the books in the library just so I had a reason to stay in the building. With my little girl so close I didn’t want to leave her side, though I was tempted to go buy her some toys to play with while she was here. I decided instead on going up to my room and grabbing my laptop before going back down and sitting in the area. If I was going to be in this quaint little bed & breakfast all day, at least I would try to get some work done.

          I was sitting there in the front room, going through emails when my little girl came bouncing through the open French doors pulling a wagon full of toys behind her. She flashed me an adorable smile as she pulled the wagon to the center of the room. I smiled back at her as I watched her little sea green eyes, that were a mirror reflection of my own, twinkle as she watched me.

          “Do you want to play dolls wift me?” She asked me with that adorable smile.

         

          I smiled and nodded as I closed my laptop to join her on the floor. Of course I wanted to play dolls with her. I would play anything she wanted to play, as long as it meant spending time with her.

          “Which doll is mine?” I asked her as I sat cross legged on the floor next to where she was standing.

          “You can be this dolly’s daddy, but she no have daddy’s same eyes like Selah.” She told me as she handed me a brown skinned baby doll with brown eyes.

          “No, she doesn’t.” I smiled to her.

          She smiled a shy smile back and started talking about getting the babies ready for school. I hadn’t played with dolls since Nadia was a kid, so I just followed her lead and played along. Occasionally she would tell me I was doing something wrong, but I’d just ask her what I was supposed to do. I enjoyed making her laugh and smile as I pretended the babies had voices and made them talk, she laughed a lot at that. Renee walked in some time later and was surprised to see me on the floor playing with Selah. She told her to leave me alone and go play by herself, but Selah told her that she was playing dolls with her daddy, which really seemed to bother Renee.

          Selah told Renee that she wanted to have tea party with me, and Renee told her that she was sure I had other things to do. I told her I had planned on hanging out until after lunch, and that I really didn’t mind entertaining Selah so she could get things done. She said it was fine, that she could handle her, and told Selah that they were going to go over to her place for a little bit. She wasn’t having that though, and started refusing to leave my side, saying that she wanted to stay with her daddy today. Renee told her that she had promised to be good this morning, and she started crying as she grabbed onto my arm and squeezed it for dear life.

          While I was happy to see that she wanted to be around me, she turned from a sweet, happy little girl to a crying, screaming mess in seconds. All because Renee wanted to take her over to her apartment. Perhaps it was because she was as perceptive as I am & could sense how uneasy Renee was with her being near me and calling me her dad. Renee’s eyes grew wide as she squeezed my arm refusing to leave, but I kept assuring her that Selah was ok hanging out with me. I promised her that we wouldn’t leave the front room while she worked around the building, and that she could come get us when lunch was ready. She nodded slightly before walking out of the room quickly.

          45 minutes later, Ricky came in telling us lunch was ready. He was eyeing me worriedly as I interacted with Selah, but he didn’t say anything. He followed us into the dining room and stood at the back of the room as I made our plates and took them to a table near where he was standing. I didn’t want her family thinking I was some creeper, but I knew that when she came to get Selah she would be able to tell them that I actually am Selah’s dad. I picked Selah up and sat her in a chair before going to get us drinks. She whined to Ricky that we needed teacups so we could have a tea party, and even though I tried to convince her that it was fine because we could pretend, she fussed until he brought out teacups for our drinks. I transferred our drinks into the teacups and her mood lightened back up.

          We were halfway through our tea party lunch when I watched a man walk into the dining room and stand next to Ricky. He and Ricky whispered back and forth while I had Selah finish off the last few pieces of fruit on her plate before I would let her be done. While she ate, she talked about playing Candyland when we were done. I told her we could play whatever she wanted to play, even though I wasn’t sure she would be here to do so.

          “Selah, sweetie. It’s time to go home, tell Mr. Nick bye.” The man pushed himself off the wall and spoke as Selah jumped from her seat to the floor.

          She immediately grabbed my legs wide eyed and began crying, breaking my heart in two. I knelt down to her size and told her that it was ok, and that it was time for her to go home but she just cried as she shook her head no. I wasn’t sure whether I was supposed to peel her off and make her go or not, but I didn’t want to. I wanted her to feel safe with me, just like she felt right now. I wanted her to know that her daddy would always protect her, but I didn’t want to undermine the authority of her aunts and uncles, which would only make life harder on her mother. But I knew that her mother had spoiled her. I could tell that she had just in Selah’s behavior. So, I was torn between whether I should make her go, or whether I would keep her with me until her mother came back to get her.

          “It’s not time. Mama say so! She say that she pick Selah up when a clock say five, oh, oh. That’s what Mama say!” She yelled to the man.

          I noticed that while he was light skinned like her siblings that I had met so far, he had blue eyes, whereas they all had brown. He was muscular, like he worked out often, so I couldn’t help but wonder if this was her husband that Josh had warned me about. I glanced down at his hand to see a white gold and diamond wedding band, and I knew that he was. Most when wore plain bands, without the diamonds or other gemstones, but she would be able to afford whatever wedding set she wanted, so if she wanted him to have a diamond studded band, she would have bought it.

          “Selah, this isn’t up for debate, let’s go. Your mom wants me to take you over to her work. Come on, lets get your coat on.” He told her as he started to walk towards us.

          I knew I’d lose it if he tried to pull her away from me, and the last thing I wanted was to cause a scene. She hid behind my legs as she started screaming about staying here with her daddy. I wanted her to stay with me too, but I knew that none of them actually believed I was her dad. She was screaming and crying at this point, while squeezing the backs of my legs tightly, so I bent down and picked her up, hoping to calm her down.

          “I stay here wift you, Daddy. Selah want to stay wift her daddy with her same eyes. Please, Daddy. I will be good. I just want to stay here wift you and play.” She threw her arms around my neck and whined.

          That was all it took to wrap me around her little finger. I rubbed her back and told her it was ok, that she could stay here with me, until her Mama came to pick her up, before hugging her tightly. If her mother wanted her to go back to her work, she could come get her herself. I certainly wasn’t going to be sending my little girl with a man that I didn’t even know that she didn’t want to go with. Especially not after she had begged me to let her stay here with me. He looked at me like he wanted to kill me, while Ricky stared me down like I was some kind of creeper.

          He told Ricky to watch me as he walked out of the room, no doubt to call Lyvie. I knew that wasn’t her real name, but she would always be my Lyvie, my wife, my one and only. As I stood there holding our little girl, rubbing her back, I started thinking about how I would soon be coming face to face with the wife that had only married me to break my heart and take my money. I began to get nervous as I thought about looking into her eyes again. As much as I couldn’t wait to see her again, I was partially terrified to do so. I had spent so much time missing her and wanting her back, but she had moved on with her life. At least she had given me the greatest blessing I could have ever hoped for. This little girl in my arms was absolutely perfect.

          I felt her breathing even out on my neck as I stood there rocking side to side while I rubbed her back, and I knew she had fallen asleep in my arms. I didn’t mind though, having her this close, her being comfortable enough to fall asleep on me, this was all perfect. Well, almost anyway, aside from the fact that everyone wanted to take her from me. The blue eyed man that I assumed was Lyvie’s new husband came walking back in and told Ricky that she was on her way. I didn’t need to ask who, I already knew he was talking about Lyvie. Soon I would be face to face with her again, and I knew she was going to be shocked to see me. But everyone would know that I’m not some creeper, that I am actually Selah’s dad. I hadn’t seen Renee since she left us in the front room, but I was sure that she thought I was a creeper too. The look on her face said as much when she walked out of the room earlier.

          I walked out the dining room doors and into the library, where I knew there was a rocking recliner chair. Both Ricky and Lyvie’s husband followed me out and down the hall to that room. I sat in the chair and rocked as I held my little girl tight, rubbing her back. Ricky sat in the chair across the room, while the other guy just stood in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest. I knew that Lyvie was here when he stood up straight and looked down the hall before nodding his head towards where I was sitting in the chair rocking my little girl. I could hear her heels clicking off the hardwood floor as she made her way closer to me, and my heart began beating faster with every step she took.

          When stopped in the doorway of the room she froze. I couldn’t help but to rake my eyes over her gorgeous, perfect frame. She was still the exact same size she was the last time I had gotten a chance to really admire her body, and the tight dress she wore showed off her curves perfectly. If I wasn’t holding the perfect little girl that she had created with that perfect body of hers, I’d have never believed she had had a child. She was still just as perfect as I remembered, still just as beautiful. Her beautiful brown eyes shimmered with the ghosts of our past as I looked into them, and I knew that she wasn’t sure what to say or do as I held our sleeping little girl.

          She hadn’t moved an inch since she laid her eyes on me, and I honestly wasn’t even sure she was breathing as she stood there frozen. I watched her face for some indication of how she felt about me being there, but there was nothing, just the wide eyes from when she first saw me. I didn’t take my eyes off of her as she stared at me, but out of the corners of my eyes I caught the way that her brother, her sister who had walked up behind her, and her husband were looking back and forth to each other. Finally I decided to break the ice and give her a soft smile. I hoped that she would respond in some way, because I was honestly beginning to worry about her.

          “Selah has insisted on staying by this man’s side all day. I think its his green eyes, she thinks he’s her dad.” Renee broke the tension in the room by speaking.

          “He is.” Lyvie whispered softly as she looked from my face to Selah whose face was buried in my neck.

          Renee’s head whipped over to look at her sister as her husband turned his intense stare from me to her. None of them could believe that while Selah had called me her daddy all day, I had let her because I actually am her dad. She and I were still maintaining eye contact, neither of us sure of what to say to the other. Then finally she did as she clasped her hands together and looked down at her feet guiltily. She inhaled sharply as she stared at the floor, no doubt waiting for me to let her know how fucked up all of this was, but I only had one thing to say to her.

          “She’s perfect.” I told her as I stood up with our little girl still sleep in my arms.