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166: Loss
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The Ganglord’s Girl 167: Goodbye
I wake up in a hospital room.Is it odd that I'm not at all confused? I remember everything, and I'm astounded by how empty I feel. There's no other word to describe this numbness. I know I should be feeling something else, like anger or even disappointment, but these emotions are just not there yet.Maybe I'll feel something later.There's a lot of pain in my abdomen, very similar to the cramps I get when I'm on my period. I'm not a hundred percent sure what this means, but it can't be a good thing. I know what I felt and I know why Elizabeth did what she did. I'm not going to lie here and try to convince myself that this isn't true, that by some miracle, my pregnancy survived that fall. I can't forget to mention that kick. Again, she knew what she was doing. This is exactly what she wanted and now, she got it.I don't know that yet, but I have a feeling.I won't feel anything until I get definite answers. I'm just making assumptions at this point. I'm alone, but I kind of wish I wer
The Ganglord’s Girl 168: Shadow
v6.12.1Welcome to Radish for Writers.Log OutEpisode PreviewStories/Story/Season/Episode PreviewShadowAn episode can only be edited for 7 days after its publication.ShadowEthan heard her scream.It was just after Damien walked out of the room looking like he left his fucking soul in there. He told the nurses to go in right after that, no doubt to sedate her.He looks at him and for the first time ever, he has no idea of what's going through his head. Something isn't right about him, and it happened right after they got the news that the nightclub downtown was on fire. They got there and found ambulances there. Some people got hurt, nothing major. An insider must have let them in, whoever 'they' might be. They're not so sure these days. It could be anyone.The point is that something within him changed—more like snapped—and he was silent the whole way here. He first noticed the difference last night, but now he has no doubts. And if Amelia was in there screaming, that can't be a
The Ganglord’s Girl 169: Worried
How could Elizabeth do such a thing?Devon knew she was going to fuck up. He knew, he even feels guilty for it. He decided that he wasn't going to do anything to stop it, but that doesn't necessarily mean that he's happy about how things went about. His heart was in his fucking throat, and he didn't know he had one.He watched when Ethan Keller invaded the building, but that was only after Elizabeth left. She looked so smug that he felt the urge to get out of the car and slap her across the face. What did she do? He expected her to drag them out, take them someplace else. That was the plan, wasn't it, if all else failed? But she walked out with the exact number of men she took inside, so that could only mean that she finished the job in there.So did that mean she found Damien in there? Were they all dead? These questions haunted him. He had to know, but he didn't want to go upstairs to find out. What if his assumptions were wrong? Or worse, what if they were true? What would he do if
The Ganglord’s Girl 170: Pain
Damien relaxes a little when he's told that Castro came through and delivered what he requested.He was counting on this. Those weapons might save him. Without them, he was utterly fucked and he knew it. He gave it his all. He had a feeling that Castro wasn't being honest, so he followed his instincts.That hardly matters now. He has them, and now he has to set his plans in motion. He doesn't have any expectations. He's going to do what he has to do and if it doesn't succeed, then fuck it. What does it matter? Amelia will be gone in a few days and he isn't going to see her again. Ever again.He made this decision when he realized that it's more probable that he'll lose this war than win it. He'll probably be forced to leave the country and that's the best case scenario if he loses. If he doesn't, he'll die, and everyone around him will die. Anyone on his side will die. He doesn't want that fate to befall her. She deserves a chance to live.Even if it's without him.It's not that the t
The Ganglord’s Girl 171: Staying
I feel a lot better. I woke up without any pain at all, but maybe it's just the effect of the painkillers I'm on.I've been trying to convince myself all morning that I had that conversation with Damien in my dreams. It was some terrible nightmare and most importantly, it never happened. He would never say such things to me. Why would he want to end us when this war barely started? But there's a dull ache in my chest that tells me otherwise, that the sooner I acknowledge that he practically broke up with me, the better.I can't accept that. I can't sit by idly as he ruins us, ruins what we have. He's scared and I get that, but we can't give up now. There's no point in me leaving now. What's done is done. I already lost our baby. If we can't get through this, we can get through anything. What's the worst that could happen?What could they possibly do to me that hasn't already been done?All morning I tried to keep myself from falling asleep because I have to see him. I can't miss him t
The Ganglord’s Girl 172: Altercation
"Answer the question."The man before him opens his mouth and blood gushes right out of it and down his chin in torrents. Damien feels no sympathy for him. This is the man who burned his nightclub down. He shouldn't have lit that fucking match. What's worse? He refuses to cooperate; he won't tell him who sent him.That just won't do."Please," he says. This is all he says. He can't understand why these men would rather beg than tell him who sent them. It's a simple question. His knuckles hurt. He's spent far too much time on this idiot and he isn't even getting anywhere. Every minute he wastes could lead to his undoing and this only serves to fuel his fury. He doesn't like this one bit. He gestures at Howie to pick the bucket of ice up. He pours it all over the man, who hisses in pain. His fingertips are blue, but this doesn't faze him. It's either he talks or he ends up dead."I have a family," he says through chattering teeth. "Please.""We all do," Damien replies coldly. "We're fam
The Ganglord’s Girl 173: Psycopath
The pain is starting to kick in. I'm sweating and I have no idea how to make this pain go away. I've already had some over-the-counter pain medication, and it helped a little. Everything hurts, from my wrist to my uterus. PI've always had issues with my period, but this is a little worse. I bought maxi pads, too, and I'll need to change soon. I'll also need to change the bandage around my wrist. I have no idea of where to go. Every time I stumble across a hotel, I wonder if I won't be too exposed. I'm not ignorant to what's happening; anyone could try to use me to get to him, exactly the way Elizabeth did. My plan is to hide out for a few days and then find him and try to convince him that we can't be apart. I've been walking for the past two hours and I haven't stopped. I didn't take a cab simply because I don't want to open this duffle bag. I could get robbed, that's also a frightening possibility. My lower back is on fire, I can't keep this up. I need to find a place to rest as
The Ganglord’s Girl 174: Collision
Devon parks the car beneath an apartment building.I recognize it. I was here with Brad last time. He didn't move? That's surprising. He's constantly on the move, so the fact that he's been here for nearly two weeks amazes me. He glances at me as if he heard my thoughts I wouldn't be shocked if he did. "I'll move out in a couple of days."I don't say anything. He moves to grab the duffel and I inch away from him. I don't want him to know what's inside, but I bet that he already knows. It's not that I think Devon is a thief, but he isn't above hiding the bag from me so I have no means of going anywhere and that can't happen. He knows what I'm carrying. I'm sure he knows.I follow him inside.I'm trying to figure out a way to get rid of him. He can't be following me around, that won't do. Sooner or later, Damien's going to try to find me and if I don't find a way to communicate with him, I'll ruin everything and that wasn't part of my plan. If Devon keeps following me, I'll lead him str
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