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“I just … I dreamt you died.” I break into a sob and there’s nothing but silence between us. I know she must feel awkward, she doesn’t know emotional Emma, I don’t think she’s seen her for a very long time. She’s no idea how much I’ve changed, what Jake has done to me or even that I’m with him at all. Last time we saw one another it ended so badly and she’s probably wondering what’s changed.

“I’m fine, darling … I’m just bobbing along, you know … Getting on with things.” She sounds wary, she doesn’t know what to say, which helps me reel back in the tears and regain my equilibrium, back to the Emma she’s more able to deal with. My mother isn’t one to be overly emotional and she sounds uncomfortable at the evidence I am.

“I think I might come home for a few days … With Jake.” I add, surprising even myself. Knowing her, she wo