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Chapter 31: Nothing
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2020-08-19 10:06:48"So, how are you feeling? We found you lying down outside unconscious,"
There was suddenly a lady in front of Jasper. She had the same pale skin and almost black hair of the little girl. Oh, the lady was the little girl's mother.
Jasper blinked. "Did you see another man with me, wearing a lab coat with a shirt and tie underneath?"
His voice sounded raspy, and he wasn't expecting to sound so broken, and pleading when speaking. Jasper blinked again, his vision suddenly becoming more blurry. He moved his head to the side, and back, watching the outlines, and colours of the woman stretch out, and wobble.
"No. You were on your own. Now, I need you to answer my question: How are you feeling?"
The woman sounded concerned, and kept one arm on the little girl, who was fiddling with the edge of the pink blanket. Wait, this would be her blanket. Jasper was in her room right now, lying down on her bed.
He blinked again, and felt two scorching, wet, itch
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"Things will get better. Ending your life isn't the answer. There are people who care for you, and things will get better. You can stay with us and heal. We're willing to help you."The lady held onto his cold, cold hands, wrapping them in warmth, warmth that travelled up his arms, embalming them in comfort and soothing his muscles, striking him in the chest, softly, brushing his fleshy, bloody heart with a feather.Jasper's eyes scrunched up, his brows furrowing. He wasn't trying to commit suicide. He was just trying to save Emm-, no, the people who he didn't deserve.He closed his eyes, and remembered the giant, enclosing, brown walls that rose above him, as he fell to the ground, from the grey, grey sky. Just because it may have looked like he had jumped from a height to end his life, didn't mean that he was actually jumping from a height to end his life.He wasn't suicidal.He wasn't.His face felt as if ice
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"Lebensmüde. It means tired of life. I'm going to get you some food."Jasper wanted Emmet. He wanted Emmet. But he had left Emmet behind. He had betrayed Emmet. He didn't deserve Emmet.What did Red_Two want? What did Red_Two really want?Jasper thought back to when he was Red_Two and thought back to the dead man in front of the library.He remembered back the pool of blood, reaching out to him, rolling along the grey floors towards his legs, whipping itself up to try its hardest to wrap itself around his hands. It was a crying, sobbing, pathetic mess. It was pitiful and lonely, trying to find company wherever it could.It was lonely and small, begging for any small scrap of love and acceptance and affection. That blood was a small wish. It wanted to not be alone in it's final moments. It wanted to have the comfort that it was human, in a world that treated it less than human. It needed to know that it had lived,
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It was the little girl.Jasper miserably knew that he could easily extract when and where he was from her, but he felt sick to his stomach. Her eyes maybe dark, but she looked too much like him, from her dark hair and sharp slant of her nose.It hurt his eyes and chest to look at her. If he gave her twenty years, she would look like his twin, save for the eyes. All he could do was squeeze his eyes shut, and hope that she would just leave."I've got your cornflakes," she announced from the side of the bed, defiant.The silence was deafening as he pretended to stay asleep, praying that she would go away. There were no footsteps and only the sound of breathing.Jasper fought against every instinct to stop his eyes from twitching, relishing in the latent pain of his wounds, grounding him, keeping him from floating off into the recesses of his mind and to forge
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Lila eventually stood up and left the room. The bowl was eventually taken from the dresser and out of the room. The sun, visible through his visible, eventually dropped below the horizon, taking all its light out of the room.Lila eventually stood up and left the room. The bowl was eventually taken from the dresser and out of the room. The sun, visible through his visible, eventually dropped below the horizon, taking all its light out of the room.But by then, Jasper had fallen asleep, his consciousness floating into the land of dreams, and out of the room.All he could see was Emmet. He saw Emmet's swirling oceanic hues. He saw Emmet's dark, long tresses. He saw the defined slope of his nose, and angular cheek bones. He was his pale, gleaming skin. He saw Emmet smiling at him, laughing, and reaching out towards him to bring him into a hug.Jasper opened his eyes, and looked up to the white ceiling.
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