Chapter 1

THREE years has passed and it happened like yesterday. I can still remember all the chaos I've been through. I got married, but never did I able to meet this person in three years of my marriage. But I think it was better because it would bring so much trouble if we met... while I was pregnant by a stranger's babies.

After all, who would like to see his wife being pregnant by someone else's baby?

No one would.

Yes. That night bore fruits. After a month of being accepted by my family again, I discovered that I was pregnant. When my family knew about it, they instantly kicked me out of the household without even thinking about it. And true to my mother's words, they totally disowned me, for I was blamed for bringing so much shame and misfortune in our family's name, and I admit it all.

I myself, was shocked. I didn't expect to be pregnant, because I only thought of it as a part of adult experience I should experience.

"I trusted you and let your shameless doing of a one night stand slide, Rain. But bearing a bastard? That's against our pride and what will people say about you? What will your husband say when he finds out that you're pregnant?! A cheating dirt of a woman while married?! Oh my goodness!" my mom's voice almost filled the whole household and it's banging every corner. She was so stressed and holding her chest dearly as if she's about to collapsed.

"Pack your things and leave. Don't let us see your face, ever again!" my aunt pushes me. I almost fell on the ground.

"You've never brought good deeds in here but shame, how disgusting!" and my cousin who was never been nice to me exclaimed after slapping me. She's gritting her teeth, eyes filled with hatred.

"I feel sick to think that you came from me." my father has always been calm and never raised his voice, but that was the most painful words came from him. He was my remaining hope to stand by me, but it was just a failure hope.

No one fought for me.

I'm alone.

And I can still remember my sibling's awful gazes, that even if they did not say anything bad and unpleasant to me, I can already tell what they wanna say.

Hence, three years has passed by. Things might be very difficult, especially in the part of being a single mother, working to earn and raising my children alone.

Those days where I was homeless and shivering in the cold during winter... and if I wasn't able to meet Bea, I might taste the worst of karma.

Everyday is a challenge. There are times that I want to give up, but whenever I thought of my children it gives me strength to go on. They've become my source of strength and my inspiration.

And even if everything started with a mistake, I learned to embrace it and take responsibility of it.

I sometimes questioned, why did god give me such riddle in life? I only commit a few mistakes and it turned me this unfortunate. I experienced crying in a lone room, asking God what to do and how to survive since I can't change anything that happened already.

And I fully understand his resolve when my children has been born. Pregnancy was not an easy ride, there's a lot to take, to adjust and to consider, especially when you do not have the funds to fulfill the foods you'd like to eat and drinks to taste.

My children gave me extravagant happiness where no one could ever replace and level. They're all I need and I wished for them to grow healthy, smart and happy.

I don't need anything, but them alone.

I'm contented for all I have.

"Mommy, are we going to the park today?" My only princess Amethyst, asked. She's tagging the hem of my shirt while looking up to me. She's not thin, just average and has a chubby cheeks. Her hair is curly and long. She looks more cute because her curls shapes the edges of her face.

I leveled myself into her and held her hands dearly, "Yes, my princess. If mommy don't have a job for the rest of the day, okay? But first, I must reassure my schedule to be clear."

She nod at me and kissed my cheek quickly, "Yes, mommy."

"Go and tell your brothers for me." Like I said, she went back to their room, probably informed her brothers.

My sons name are Alas and Duke. They're also cute and handsome. Atop of all, they're smart despite their age.

"Mommy!" I was about to go to the kitchen when my boys was quick to hug my thighs.

"Mommy, your phone rang." they are giggling as they showed me my phone which has a missed call history.

"Oh, thank you boys." I took the phone from them and checked who the caller was.

When I saw it, my eyes almost popped out on its shell and my heart jumped in glee.

"Oh my... Oh my god!" due to overflowing gratitude and happiness, I embraced my children and showered them kisses.

"Mommy, what is going on?" my baby Amy innocently asked, when she saw me cried happily while hugging her brothers. "Why are you crying?" her voice is so soft that I do not wish to be tainted. Her voice is like an angel that provides melody in my heart which also serve as my reminder to be humble and kind all the time.

"Come on, my princess. Let mommy hug you." she gladly obliged and went to us. Alas wiped my tears, while Duke kissed my nose.

"We love you, mommy." they said and it made me more teary-eyed.

I thanked the heavens for granting this opportunity to me.

"Mommy is just happy because I got accepted at the job I'm applying for. We will now have a better source of income, it's a good news for us!" I gathered them in my arms once again and let go after a few seconds.

"Yey! Mommy has a new job!"

"Will mommy won't get stressed of her job?" Duke asked. I sensed worry from him.

"No, no, not anymore baby. I assure you that." his worries was replaced by a smile immediately.

"Does this mean, mommy has a better schedule and will not come home late?" Alas questioned. I held his hands and squeezed them lightly, just like what I did to Duke just now.

"Yes, mommy will have a proper schedule baby. But now, mommy has to go to the company for an interview. I will leave you to your godmother for a while, and will fetch you when I'm done there. Is that okay?"

"Of course, mommy!"

"You can do it, mommy!"

"Goodluck, mommy!"

I left them to my friend before going to the company. I had my children's blessing and I believe it would give me the best I can get.

I can do this, for my children my family.