03| Purpose

"You are the only one who knows yourself, your feelings, and what you need. Therefore, the opinion of others should only serve as a reference, but not as a guide."

- Don Miguel Ruiz

- Kimani Trinity Campbell -

I was seated in my professor's office, surrounded by the mess of art supplies and completed works. The walls were cluttered with paintings, sculptures, and sketches. The room was cramped and cluttered, but it was clear that my professor loved every inch of it.

"Kim, I need to talk to you about your painting," my professor started, pointing at the canvas on the easel in front of us.

"Is something wrong with it?" I asked, feeling a knot form in my stomach.

"Well, it's not exactly what I was expecting," he replied, frowning. "I was hoping for something more... impactful. This painting doesn't seem to have any real emotion behind it."

I sat there, feeling the weight of his words sink in. I had put so much time and effort into that painting, but it seemed to have fallen short in my professor's eyes.

"I'm not saying it's a bad painting," he continued, sensing my disappointment. "But if you want to make it in the world of art, you need to find a way to connect with the audience on a deeper level. You need to make them feel something."

I was fazed by his words. My heart raced as I tried to process what he had said. I had put so much time and effort into this painting. I had poured my heart and soul into every stroke of the brush, every swirl of color.

I had spent countless hours day and night, lost in my world of imagination and creativity. I had spent months working on it, fine-tuning every detail, perfecting every stroke. I had taken my time, using my imagination to create a world that was uniquely my own.

"What do you mean there's something wrong with it?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady.

"It's just not good enough," my professor replied, his voice laced with disappointment. "It lacks originality, it's too predictable, and it just doesn't stand out."

How could he say that about my work? How could it not be good enough?

"But I put so much time and effort into this," I protested. "I wanted to create something unique, something that would stand out."

"I understand that," my professor said, "but sometimes, no matter how much time and effort you put into something, it just doesn't work out."

I couldn't believe that all my hard work had gone to waste. I felt like a failure like I had let myself down.

But then, as I sat there in that cramped office filled with art and sculptures, I realized something. I didn't create this painting for someone else's approval, I created it for myself. I created it because I loved the process, I loved the feeling of being lost in my imagination.

"You know what?" I said, standing up and gathering my things. "I appreciate your honesty, but I don't need your approval. I create art because I love it, not because I want someone else to like it."

And with that, I walked out of the office with my Canva in hand, my head held high, and a newfound sense of pride and determination. I may not have impressed my professor, but I had impressed myself. And in the end, that was all that mattered.

My phone beeped and I quickly glanced down to see a text from Bella. "Coffee?" it read. I smile at the invitation, grateful for a break. I typed a quick reply, "Yes, see you soon."

~★~

I breathed in the crisp autumn air, the leaves on the trees had turned golden and orange, and the sky was a brilliant blue. I made my way to the coffee shop, enjoying the crispness of the weather and the sounds of the city.

Bella was waiting for me at a small table by the window, a steaming cup of coffee in front of her. "How was it?" she asked as I sat down. "What did old man Fred say about your new piece?"

"It was rough," I admitted, taking a sip of my coffee. "He wasn't happy with my latest painting."

She raised an eyebrow. "Really? Your work was amazing."

I smiled at her words. "Thanks. But apparently, it wasn't good enough for him." I went on to explain the critique I received, and Bella listened intently.

"You know what," she said after I finished talking. "Screw him. Your art is beautiful and unique, and that's what matters."

I nodded, feeling a weight lift off my shoulders. "You're right. I need to keep creating and not let anyone else's opinions hold me back."

We continued our conversation, laughing and chatting about our lives and recent activities.

I sipped my coffee as Bella gushed about her new boyfriend, Ken. "He's just amazing, Kim," she said, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "He's the starting point guard for our college basketball team and he's already been scouted by a few NBA teams."

I smiled, taking in the sight of Bella's excitement. I had never seen her so happy before. "That's great, Bellz. Ken sounds like a catch," I said, trying to hide my envy.

She leaned forward, looking at me with a serious expression. "So, how about you and Shawn?" she asked.

I sighed, feeling a weight settle on my chest. "We broke up," I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

Her eyes widened in surprise. "What happened?" she asked, reaching out to take my hand.

I took a deep breath, gathering my thoughts. "I don't know, Bellz. It just wasn't working out. We were from two different worlds, and no matter how much we tried, we just couldn't seem to find common ground."

She nodded, squeezing my hand. "I'm sorry, Kim. I know you really cared about him."

I nodded, fighting back tears. "I did. I really did. But sometimes, love just isn't enough."

We sat in silence for a few moments, both lost in our thoughts. The sound of the autumn wind blowing through the trees was the only thing that filled the air.

"You'll find someone better," Bella said, breaking the silence. "Someone who will appreciate and love you for who you are. You're an amazing person, Kim, you're beautiful, talented, smart, and kind."

I smiled, grateful for her words of encouragement. "Thank you. And I'm sure you and Ken will have a long and happy life together."

She beamed, her eyes lighting up once again. "I know we will, Kim. And I hope you find that too."

I smiled warmly at her, grateful for her support and never-ending love.

"By the way, how's your mum?" I asked.

She sighed and her face dropped. "She's still struggling. It's been a year since dad died, but it feels like it happened just yesterday. I just don't know how to help her."

I could feel the sadness in her voice and I knew how much she loved her mum. "I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine what she's going through," I said, reaching across the table to squeeze her hand.

Bella smiled weakly. "I just want to be there for her. That's why I'm going to stay with her for a few days. She needs me right now."

I nodded, understanding the weight of her decision. "That's great. She's lucky to have you."

Bella shrugged. "I just wish I could do more. I feel like I'm not doing enough."

"You're doing everything you can. Just being there for her is enough," I said, trying to offer some comfort.

She nodded and took a sip of her coffee. We continued our conversation, talking about her mum and the memories she had of her dad. I could see how much she missed him, but I also saw the strength and courage she had in helping her mum through this difficult time.

As our conversation came to an end and we said goodbye, I was filled with a newfound appreciation for the love and sacrifice that families make for each other. It was a beautiful reminder that even in the toughest of times, we can find comfort and solace in the ones we love.

I whipped out my phone from my pocket and quickly typed a message to my dad. "Hi Dad, just wanted to check in and say I love you. How's everything going at the office?" I hit send, feeling a rush of happiness engulf me.

As I wait for his reply, I took a sip of my coffee, savoring the warm, rich flavor. A few moments later, my phone beeps with a message from my dad. "I love you too, sweetheart. Everything's going great at the office. Miss you already. Have a great day!" I smiled, feeling a sense of comfort and happiness knowing my dad was always there for me.

I got up and made my way to the door. As I stepped outside into the crisp autumn air, I couldn't help but reflect on the world and how strange it was.

Everything around me was so fleeting, so uncertain, so unpredictable. One moment, I was talking with Bella and talking about her new relationship, the next moment I was thinking about my dad and sending him a warm message. It was like the world was constantly in motion, never slowing down for a second.

I took a deep breath and gazed up at the sky. The sun was shining bright, and the leaves were a beautiful array of oranges, yellows, and reds. I wonder if the world was trying to tell me something, trying to show me that amidst the chaos, there was still beauty and peace to be found.

I made my way down the sidewalk, taking in all the sights and sounds around me. The world was a strange place, but it was also a place full of love, hope, and endless possibilities.

And as I walked, I couldn't help but feel grateful for it all.

We all have a purpose in life, Kimani.

My dad would have said.