The Angel and The Fighter

No, no, no, no.How could I have forgotten today's Spanish exam?How was I able to put my place at the University on the line?How did I let myself be influenced by Chelsea?! Damn, dammit.I knew it had been a bad idea to attend a party at Harley Tombson's house on a Tuesday. If I had only sustained my argument for a few more minutes, Chelsea would have given up dragging me to South Boston just to attend a dumb party at the cottage of the most popular girl in high school.A damn party the day before the Spanish exam!Everything was going downhill!My brain was too busy trying to recover from the alcohol it was subjected to during the evening games to recall the subjects of Mr. Kavisck's classes. My ability to swallow thousands of contents in a single minute had melted along with each of my neurons. It was as if I had been turned to powder thanks to the damn whiskey I swallowed down my throat without even remembering the next day.It was only fifteen minutes before I was forced into

FOUR YEARS LATERThe flashes flickered in such rapid motions that my eyes turned into dark, crooked, blurry blurs. With each clicking sound invading my eardrums, the more my brain forced itself to keep the smile exposed and the pupils perfectly focused, without offering pauses to get out of character.— Beautiful! Splendid! Wonderful!My photographer praised endlessly, encouraging me to keep my breath set, my shoulders firm, and my head sticking out.All for the perfect portrait.All to please my boss.All for the company.All for my family.Whenever I thought about giving up, ripping off that pinic, shiny, tacky outfit, I remembered why I'd been doing it. It only took a few words for my conscience to guide me back to reason.— The last one, Angel! — the redhead said. — Smile as if you had fulfilled all your dreams!I did as he asked. I bared all my teeth, narrowed my ribs, pulled my hips, made my eye sockets burn so they could continue to sustain the flash.But for a moment,

That couldn't be true. Had I hallucinated the whole thing? Did that scene really happen? Was Ian Caccini, a ghost, really on my doorstep? And being a son of a bitch of a jerk?I questioned my lucidity for hours. I showered, put on a fresh outfit, brushed my hair and went to prepare a snack still with doubt choking my senses.After a long time of reasoning, I came to a solid conclusion: that mature looking, cold, tired, grown up guy was Ian Caccini. The same kid who confronted me on one of the worst days of my life (my first low grade), the same guy who called me on a date before I disappeared for four years, and the same guy who treated me like a stranger two hours ago.I didn't change as much as he did, and as soon as I slammed my eyes on his face, I knew who it belonged to. I would never forget him. How was he able to forget me?Not that I cared that much, but Ian saw me every Sunday for two years of our lives. Every Monday in Spanish class and almost every damn day in the halls of

The weekend passed like a destructive and merciless hurricane.I didn't have time off. I had to be at Diamond for three photo shoots and to help some new models who were in training.Rachel, unfortunately, was at the company monitoring everything and wouldn't even let me go out for lunch.— We don't have a break today to eat. — she said.After that he looked down on my body and mentioned harshly and firmly that it would be for my own good.It felt like punishment for the days I couldn't do jump rehearsals because of my foot. I never wanted to fly on her neck so much as I did in that torturous minute.But I didn't. I didn't even retort. I just remained silent and finished my work as she asked.It wasn't that hard, I was used to it, however, it was completely exhausting to deal with that superficial world. It was exhausting to be part of this superficial world.But it was my job and my life. I just needed to get used to swallowing, affirming, and smiling.— Whoops... Hey... Remembe

I wake up the next day with scarce energies. It was as if an entire bus was parked on top of me at night. I could barely close my eyes, I couldn't stop thinking for a second about the latest events in my energy life.At least Rachel gave the weekend workers a break, so I had Monday off so I could catch my breath.The sun rose fast, warming the walls of the building. For lack of sleep, I saw him rise through my window and take possession of the darkened sky. When some birds began to sing and the movements of the cars were audible, I got up to make a strong tea.I put the boiling water in the kettle while I was still inside my thick pajamas. At the whistle, I deposited it in a mug along with the chamomile. It was hot, both the tea and the weather and my pajamas. For that reason, as soon as I savored it all, I took a long shower.I could feel sleep coming when my phone rang. I thought about ignoring and dozing off in the tub as drowsiness overwhelmed me, but I wasn't able to. I wrapped m