Max After I leave Rayne's room, I feel like absolute shit and garbage. I didn't mean to say those things to her. I didn't intend to be so harsh. Everything I said to her was only a way of trying to keep her from telling anyone what we discussed last night, which was foolish of me by the way, as I should've been more careful. I shouldn't have allowed the moon’s pull to affect my mind in such a way that I told my deepest secret to a stranger. It was reckless of me.Rayne is a stranger. There is no denying that. Although I know her story and she knows mine, nothing changes the fact that we’re strangers. I know that what I felt last night was not what I feel today, but that was lunacy. It’s like I went crazy for a bit, which isn’t so shocking considering that it’s not the first time this has happened. The first time I confessed my feelings for Alaska, the same thing happened. I had a drink and then went to her room while I was spending some time at GrayLeaf with Albert. She laughed at m
RayneIt's hard to keep that mindset going when I can feel him making love to Alaska through my bond. I turn to my side, feeling anguished and heartbroken. Exhausted. Defeated. All of these negative emotions are directly tied to him. Rather, to the bond between us. The pain is similar to colics. The sun has risen and I didn't sleep a wink last night. I was kept up all night by that...feeling. That awful feeling that pools between my legs yet hurts at the same time. Is this the kind of anguish and torture I'm supposed to endure while he has the time of his life with her?There's a knock at the door. Breakfast. I don't say a word and it opens anyway. Caddie walks in, greeting me cheerfully. I feel terrible that I don't have the strength to even greet her back. I feel horribly ill. If I knew I'd feel this way after Alaska's arrival, I would have tried my luck with that man who wanted to take me away. Surely anything is better than this. I wonder how he feels. If I feel this way, then
Rayne“What can I do for you?” I ask Brumilda after Caddie has left. She’s sitting in the edge of my bed and her hands are on her lap. She appears calm, so I can’t begin to imagine what she wants to say to me. She seems to take a liking to me, though I can’t imagine why. I can’t say that I’m nervous in her presence. It’s just it’s something about this feels…off.“Meeting you the other day was unexpected,” says Brumilda. “You’re not at all what I was expecting.”I nod my head slowly. I don’t know what to make of this. “I’m not sure what you mean.”“When we heard of the mating accident, we were all very disappointed. Mind you, I wasn’t at the ceremony myself. I was not at all expecting someone like you.”I’m still not sure what she means by someone like me, and I’m not sure I want to know. I say, “I’m glad I’ve surprised you.”She offers me a wide smile. “I’m sure you’re confused by my words, and frankly, I’m not supposed to be here. If Veronica found out that I came here, she wouldn’t
MaxI have been avoiding Alaska like the plague. Our first night together proved to be a disaster. I knew that in a way, my body rejected her, but I could never have guessed that things could have gotten so bad. It's angering. It's disappointing. Revolting. I can't touch her. Not without feeling the pain of a thousand swords stabbing my body over and over again.It wasn't that bad when I only held her and kissed her. I felt some discomfort, but nothing close to what I felt when I was actually inside of her. It was excruciating but I couldn't stop. I tried to tell myself that I was addicted to the pain. Telling myself that made it easier to endure it. At that moment, the pain and the pleasure of having her combined and made a powerful cocktail of emotions that I could, at that moment, take. Alaska, thankfully, didn't notice a thing. To her, everything was normal. I was the one dying. I was the one being torn to pieces.And all the while, I thought about Rayne. It's almost like the bo
RayneEveryone turns to applaud the arrival of the couple. I don’t. I stand facing Albert while the sound of cheering and clapping hands permeates the air. I drink deeply from the cup in my hand to swallow the pit forming in my throat. Thankfully, nobody notices me. Even if they did, why would they find my reaction strange?Wouldn’t it be stranger if I applauded? Waiting for the applauses to die down is painfully awkward. I keep drinking my glass and hoping that tears won’t snake down my face. I feel so out of place right now. I don’t even know where to look. “Thank you,” Max says, raising a hand. “Thank you all for being here and celebrating this special moment with us.”Because I’m standing next to Albert, I know that it’s only a matter of time before Max and Alaska walk toward us. I saw only a flash of her face and her dress, but it was enough to make me agree with what everyone always said. Alaska is stunning. There is a bright light in her eyes and smile. She just has this
RayneAlbert climbs off my body, leaving me feeling bare and exposed. I didn’t notice how the skirt of my dress was riding up my thighs. I quickly push it down while making eye contact with Max. “Out,” he barks at Albert. Albert raises his hands and glances at me before walking out. Just like that. I’m too angry at Max to be disappointed that he didn’t at least stay and argue. He just walked out. Once he and I are alone in the room, he slams the door shut, so hard that I feel the vibrations deep in my flesh. He takes a few steps toward me and asks, “Are you crazy? Have you lost your mind?”I recover from the shock of seeing him here and rise from the bed slowly. “Crazy?”“Albert?” he asks, then scoffs. “I thought you were better than that. I didn’t think you’d offer yourself up to him like a—”He cuts himself off and runs his fingers through his hair. An act of pure frustration. He turns away from me. I don’t know what it is. Maybe it’s the alcohol coursing through my veins. Maybe i
RayneMax and I make eye contact. The pressure building in my core disappears when I stop grinding the pillow. I’m so shocked that he’s here that I don’t have time to feel embarrassed that he caught me touching myself. I have completely forgotten that he can feel everything I do through the bond. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. There is a part of me that is apologetic yet the other part—the one that only presented itself after he humiliated me the other night—is smiling. Maybe he senses it. Maybe he doesn’t. Either way, he says nothing about it. He doesn’t say anything. He nears the bed slowly. His eyes never leave my face. It’s only when he gets nearer to me that I notice how there is fire in his eyes. I stay exactly where I am, positioned on top of the pillow, as he nears my bed. It all happens quickly. He stands over me and stares down at me with an expression that terrifies yet thrills me simultaneously. Then, he grabs my chin and runs his thumb over my lips. I part my lip
MaxThey say the morning after is always the worst. ‘After’ could mean anything. For some people, it’s that terrible migraine after a full night of drinking. For others, it’s a sickening realization. Perhaps even an acceptance of something. In my case, it has the worst of meanings. I had sex with Rayne last night. I groan as I sit up in bed. I’m in my room, mostly because I avoided Alaska the night before after I came from Rayne’s room. I told her I was too tired and that I needed to get some work done and she believed me. Then again, why would she have any reason at all to doubt me?I’m supposed to be the man who would move mountains for her. I’m the man who loves her more than anything in the world. I can’t begin to explain what happened last night. I don’t know what it was that drew me to her. It was strong, so strong that I couldn’t move for a few beats. Hot pleasure coursed through me and all I could think about was her. This happened shortly after I left her room. I felt he