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Chapter 5
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2024-10-29 19:42:56Noah
The only subject for argument over these past months between us has been my refusal to visit a psychiatrist and Ella forcing me into it. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what to ask for. What I needed to get peace. I wasn’t satisfied with my life. Even though I had a reason to. I could just ignore everything. And focus on my family. My wife. My future children. I didn’t know how to tell about my feelings. Feelings about Jenny luring me to meet everyone. But I hated it when she says that. I wanted to forget that I was the reason they died. I remember how she said to me that if mom knew she would be very disappointed. It was a mistake. Just a mistake. That cost me everything. And cost them their lives. I wiped my tears.
My head rested on a squashy grey pillow while my eyes gazed out of the glass window at a lonely nightingale perched on a branch of the tree. Its head turned towards me; eyes set on mine. A moment later it cruised through the air scanning the ground below.
My brain kept turning over the pages of souvenirs, countless thoughts whipped through my mind leaving the muscles of my forehead to tense up. The practicality of my thoughts vaporized some time ago yet my head churns on in the darkness like a runaway motor. I turned my head over to Ella; she was sound asleep. In the clearing, a grin of moonbeams arched across her dainty nose. This woman should be entitled to all the gifts and glees this world has to offer.
There had been nights when I could only fall asleep after staying up for several nights without consuming any stimulants. That was it, I had given up on forcing myself to sleep therefore I ran my fingers across the surface of the side table beside me to get some sleeping pills. I’ve always preferred taking Restoril as they not only help to fall asleep but also stay in the same state for as long as it is required.
I swallowed a pill without any water. What if you die in your sleep tonight? Dude shut up! How do you know that there are no dead souls lingering in the air? Pills won’t work if you don’t shut up. The last one, maybe there's a way you could contact Jenny? I mean people tell all kinds of stories about connecting to your twin. I strived to tackle my thoughts. My subconscious won’t shut up.
A sharp-witted beam fell on my eyelids, it wasn’t the moonbeams, it was intense enough to make me believe that the sun had come out to play. Is it dawn already? I had just zoned out. My eyelids parted; light dwindled. The sky was still dark. Ella wasn’t sleeping beside me, perhaps she had gone to the bathroom. I laid drowsily in my bed waiting for her to come back.
Fifteen minutes had passed, and pessimism began to cross my mind. I got up and wended my way to the bathroom, the door was partially closed on pushing it open my sight fell on the bathtub quarter of it filled with water, I scanned across all four corners, but she wasn’t there. Where was Ella? Admit it Noah She was exhausted of you and your messed-up life. Shut up! Not the time.
“Ella?”
I wandered through the hallway peeking into the rooms through partly opened doors.
“Ella? Answer me!” My voice got louder.
I made my way down the stairs and switched on the lights in the living room. The main door was locked from the inside just the way I do, and a portable door lock was installed with a motion detector fitted into the wall beside the door frame.
“Ella? This is not funny. Please!”
Maybe I was dreaming, maybe Jenny is yet to appear. Okay … it’s fine … it’s totally fine, she will … call my name, wake me up. Ella will call my name.
I whispered to myself, “Ella will call my name … she will call me back. She will yank me out of here … calm down. Sit and wait. Sit … and … wait.”
I collapsed into the couch behind me, felt like an eternity what had passed. Jenny hadn’t appeared yet; Ella wasn’t calling me either. My mouth dried up, heart leaped into my throat, freezing beads of sweat rushed down my neck, spine crept up, muscles in my stomach clenched, ears anxiously wanting to hear Ella but the only voice I heard was: this is real, you’re not dreaming. I thwacked my cheeks, endeavoring to escape the nerve-wracking terror.
I mumbled, “Wake up … Noah … wake up …”
Ella Is gone. No … no … no. I got to my feet and lingered in circles around the couch, my mind recalled that sharp beam of light that woke me up. I advanced towards the main door and tried to unbolt the lock with my trembling fingers. The absence of light and chilly blows of wind had an uneasy and creepy vibe to them. The water in the lake played no music, crickets were not chirping. That night did not seem normal, the deepest part of my heart still believed that I was hallucinating keeping me from the bitter reality.
I ran to my left into the woods the side that was visible from the window of our room.
“Ella!”
My throat closed up.
“Ella! This is not funny, please.”
Tears welled up in my eyes.
“Ella it’s not safe for you! ”
A ball of despair hit me.
“Ella don't do this to me, please! I won't last a day without you. Ella! I love you! I will do whatever you ask for!” I screamed at the top of my lungs.
Lost. Is what I will be without her. My wife probably needs me. She might be in danger. Maybe she went for a walk. And got lost. Or maybe she left. She must be tired of my messed-up life. She was pretty and had a life ahead. I didn’t. I was just surviving. I never wanted to leave this place. Maybe she did. I tried to stop every thought.
Searching eagerly through the forest bush after bush I tripped on a rock, welled up tears finally dripped on the dried leaves. Muscles in my body were paralyzed, head spun violently leaving me jammed to the ground. My heart pounded as if it would burst open any second, nerves swelled up. I laid like a lifeless body, arms and legs stretched out, and the right side of my face rested over the dehydrated leaves. Soon the view before my eyes gradually blurred.
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That Night in the Woods Chapter 11
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NOAH I could see Liam gazing at me in an awkward manner. I didn't get it. Probably he had heard about my first meeting with Lane. Olivia had told me that it was not quite what they were expecting. I wholly broke down when they asked about my family. “I have a wife. I don’t know where she is as if now. But Olivia … she said that she’d help me find her,” I answered his question. "And what about your parents?" he came up with another question. "They died. And m--my twin sister. She also died." His face ran blank, eyes felt like peering right into my soul. He was still expecting something. An extended answer perhaps. Or probably a reaction. I had nothing else to say. Olivia stepped into the awkward pause between us. She stood there for a while without saying anything. “Liam.” She sighed. “Monica and I were taking Noah out. Lane said to take you with us. If you wanted to go.” He rose to his feet. I overheard him whisper, “wait … he got a pass already?” Olivia didn't both
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OliviaEzra, Alyssa, and I perched in the waiting area. I wondered if this was the hospital she worked at. But if she worked here, then why was she sitting with us and not on her duty? She probably was employed in some other hospital or a nursing agency. My heart was throbbing. Any of the veins attached to it could explode any moment sending me up there to God. Every time a nurse passed by, my body was ready to jump up to listen to what they had to say. Hopefully, they’d tell us that she’s alright now. And we can go meet her. And probably take her home with us a few hours later. My sight fell over Ezra’s fidgeting fingers. She appeared as anxious as I was. A faint smell of medicine which was continuously lingering around my nose grew stronger. I lay another glance at Ezra. She looked like her name. A nice middle-aged lady with short hair and a fair complexion. Which made me think if she looked like her name in her teens. I don’t know about other people but that is what an Ezra would
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Olivia Then Two Months Later I stood before the stove, the sole of my foot resting on the side of my knee. As the bubbles started appearing over the pancake, I stuck the spatula beneath it and flipped it over. The pancake liberated a sweet and buttery aroma, only because I added butter essence. But, it would taste like crap. I could only make scrumptious pancakes using the mix. But they were way too expensive. We were running out of money. Dad’s bank accounts had been emptied. And after mom’s medicine, we only had a couple of hundred dollars left at home. She wasn’t in a condition to work. She could barely get out of bed lately. The future appeared dark to me. We hadn’t heard about dad since the cops took him. Mom could barely take care of herself, and Alyssa and I were left on our own. The stress, of how everything will end up, was catching up to me. The ringing of the house phone tore through my eardrums, making the sizzling noises unnoticeable. I set my foot on the ground, flip
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OLIVIA20 years ago“When your parents tell you to back off, you back off Olivia!” mom scolded me with one hand on her waist and the other holding her phone.“But--““I don’t want to hear any ifs and buts, young lady. What if someday your dad has to bear the consequences of your actions like this? Huh?” she interrupted.Alyssa gazed at us. I shot a glance at her. She was petrified. “I’m sorry.”The hand on her waist went down with a sigh. She dialed a number on the phone and walked into another room. Guilt engulfed me as mom’s words sauntered into my mind. I just wanted to be a good daughter. I wanted to protect him like he provided a shield for us. I knew my father was innocent. ****Mom had been strolling around the house, with the phone in one hand tapping her nails on it. Alyssa perched on the couch, peeling the skin on her lips, staring at mom. My stomach grumbled. But I was too stressed to eat something. “It’s okay girls. Don’t worry your dad will be alright.”Mom sat beside
That Night in the Woods Chapter 29
NOWNOAHElla lay curled up in bed. A white mushy blanket wrapped around her, eyes squeezed shut. I drew open the curtains and went back outside to grab the breakfast tray and bouquet of roses, which I ordered this morning. Holding the tray in one hand and flowers behind my back with the other, I gushed, “good morning WiFi!”She wrinkled her nose, cheeks raised up, a pout on her face with a hint of a smile.“No,” Ella shook her head, “No.”“No?” I asked.“Yeah--no.” She let out a chuckle.“I thought you’d like some breakfast in bed, with a thing I got here in the back.” I raised an eyebrow and beamed at her. “About the WiFi thing silly.” I knew she was talking about the ‘WiFi’ thing. I adored how my cringe pet names wrinkled her nose every time. She rested her back against the bed’s headboard, still enveloped in the blanket. I placed the tray before her, in which sat a stack of perfectly cooked souffle pancakes. Perfectly cooked according to her, overcooked in my opinion. She love
That Night in the Woods Chapter 28
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Noah It had been over a month since Olivia yanked my heart out of my chest and chopped it into a million pieces. It still is divided into a million pieces that I have scattered now. I wasn't prepared to believe her. My mind wasn't ready to believe this atrocious truth. I just wanted to sleep. I didn't want to feel anything. I didn't want to feel this air engulfing me. This mushy bed, I was sitting on. The body my soul dwelled in. I just wanted to stop. Stop feeling everything. Every time I hear her words heat of anguish arises in my body and soul. The fury takes over. I couldn't control myself when it happened two weeks ago. I slammed the door shut pounding my head over it, expecting the physical pain to put an end to that agony inside of me. It didn't go away. I smacked the glass window with my bare hands until the shards of glass punctured my hand. It still didn't go away. It won't ever go away. I wanted to do it again. I wanted to hurt myself for believing she existed. I wanted t
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Olivia Sunday 24th June 1990 We were having the time of our lives. Alyssa's fifth birthday was right around the corner when she desired to go to Hawaii. She didn't say that she wanted to go to Hawaii. Last Friday, we were sitting on the patio after dinner. I rested my head on the armchair's backrest, with one hand over my bloated stomach, holding back a burp because mom taught us that it was discourteous to let out a loud belch around people. I couldn't help cramming that delicious salmon and sweet potato wedges in my mouth. Dad swiped through the images of travel destinations on his tablet, racking his brain that what will be our destination for the family vacation. We go on vacation twice every year. On my and Alyssa's birthday then Mom and Dad's birthday each year alternatively. While he was swiping through photos of some of the eye-catching places in Hawaii, Alyssa, who was dangling over the armrest of Dad's chair, pointed at one of the pictures and screamed with excitement, "I
